All Comments on 'A Mind is a Terrible Thing'

Very good. Sluty wife=sluty shot

Great story about a.nice little BTB sting. Short and , oh, so sweet. Write again soon.

fuck that bitch, she got what she deserved, same with loverboy.

...what a great story. Well done. 5 star. Thanx!

Loklie

"Apparently Annie Oakley chokes under pressure." Great line there. Makes the stuff you wrote in the beginning useful, I like that. Really enjoyed this.

After you bombard your target to rubble, then make the rubble bounce!

Yehudi

Despite what you see in the movies , handguns are woefully weak in terms of actual killing ability on something the size of a man unless you strike the central nervous system or the heart .

Don't believe me , then simply Google Chicago shooting victims divided by deaths , I'll wager its less than 10 % .

Bullets that expand make sure that most of the projectiles energy is dissipated within the body , and also gives a much larger frontal area that will cause crush damage to organs and tear arteries and major veins . They will accomplish this so much more effectively than a fmj , or a pickaxe handle !

Really enjoyed this story Moreandmore .

Very original. I can’t remember who, but a while back, someone submitted an LW story wherein the wife was caught by a red-light cam photo. “A Mind” kinda reminds me of that. We can’t escape the eye in the sky any more.

Here’s an interesting premise: Shauna gets out on parole hardened and embittered seven years later - can the spider in Blake weave another trap when she comes gunning for him?

A pleasure to read. Thanks *****

Novel revenge well executed.

That was a glorious BtB!

Using Shauna's secretive slutty double-life against her, the weeks of mental torture as she was trapped in her own lies, then tricking her into shooting her lover... and getting 20 years for it! Brilliant!

The pep talks with the spider made me laugh too. Thanks for the entertaining story.

A crazy bitch with a loaded gun?....A recipe for Disaster!.....As for the story... Oh it was.... GOOD....but it gave me the impression that it ran out of Puff a couple of chapters before the end?.....Prior to that this is a Brilliant Witty Story!.....So that's My Comment 5 Stars ★★★★★Woof!

..Ray's surname, Stronzo...in Italian it means "shit"....was that a coincidence or did you pick it for that reason..?

Gotta love it when their own words come back to haunt them.

5/5

Drive the bitch crazy, then trick her into shooting her lover and frame her for the murder.(Or at least the attempt) Thank you for sharing the product of your twisted mind.

Love your story!!!

5

PS: NO... he doesn't need help with his jealousy.

(he is no tret to the public, or love ones)

A dark comedy...And a good one...I assumed it was a comedy as soo as I read the lover's name "Stronzo"...In italian it means: "Asshole"...The weak point? the second shot should have hit the lover in the balls, not in the ear, and so the story would end with a "No balls Stronzo"...4*

You tied it up fairly well in two pages. The device of using her own mind to facilitate the revenge was Hitchcock-ian. I do think twenty years is a bit harsh for an affairs, but it's your story so you get to decide.

Again, you are congratulated an excellent yarn. A story with imagination and originality. No long drawn out verbal porn... 5 *

Great Story!!!!

that is a BTB story. lol

I liked the way you wrote the character perspectives between Blake and Shauna. I tried that and it didn't go over very well.

AND clever. I like different.

I like clever also,

Thanks,

MGM

what a story what a concept. LOVED IT

"slow clap"

I would have liked more from both sides. Why? Would have liked to know more about Ray and his wife. Why?

That said, I appreciate this short and tense story. Had me on edge even though I knew who the stalker was.

Good shot.

Got to love it when a. Plan comes together!

I don't like a lot of the BTB stories, but this one resonated for me. It had a different take on the revenge angle. Well told.

I enjoyed it and didnt expect it to be Ray getting shot.

I think a good defense lawyer could have used the following:

- the photos sent to her with the accompanying messages... traced back

- the records of all the calls to her office and cell phone... traced to a burner phone

- cell tower records showing where the mysterious calls originated, and showing she could not have made the calls herself

- the opening of a new private account and transfer of exactly 50% of their joint assets into that account... the same day the mysterious calls started...

- wonder if blood, tissue and hair tests could indicate the presence of heavy, prolonged and repeated doses of sedatives...

Maybe an interesting alternative would have been Blake composing this from prison.

Lucky timing for the accident but well planned counter assault against the wife. Sad that Ray's wife had to learn about his affair while trying to care for him after the shooting but that will be in her favor during the divorce.

Never saw this revenge before; good story; 5* in my book.

Went well with the coffee thanks

Don't you love it when a plan comes together? ;-)

On a side note, two hits our of five - shooting blindly through a door in panic - was enough to get the job done.

Thanks for another entertaining little tale!

Quick flash about well planed out, yet still quite crazy scheme to get even with a cheating spouse.

Sure, the whole thing working out so perfectly is kinda implausible - instead of trying to pin the whole thing on her husband, a good lawyer would have tried to make Shauna looks like a poor wife who's, after inviting her lover to her home, had second thoughts and shot him when he insisted to get in her bedroom. 'Don't know, would have sound more plausible...

In any case, she has no one, but herself, to blame here, for her getting jailed for two decades - all she had to do was come clean to Blake, and she would have walk away single, sure, but not in prison! Everybody got exactly what they deserved here, 'cause their desires were the reason why they ended up where they are now.

I like the structure of this tale, but I would have like Shauna to get the last word here, since we got a glimpse of her thinking right to the shooting, but nothing afterward. I would have love to hear her thoughts as she figured out that Blake was the mastermind behind her downfall. Doubtful she would have taken any personal responsibility for it, but it would have been fun to read about her, venting and ranting, against the man she 'loves'. Plus 'wouldn't have mind hearing about the state of the Stronzo marriage - zero doubt here that the missus has dump his sorry ass, but it's always nice to have some confirmation, on those things (BTW, if Ray could somehow sue Blake over his shooting, wouldn't Blake to able to counter-suit him on the grounds of 'alienation of affection, resulting in the end of my marriage'? But yeah - nobody got a hell of a lot of money here, so... empty moral victory, this would be.)

Ah well - whatever. Very fun little thing to read, on this sunny Sunday morning. ★★★★★

Debating: 4 or 5-stars.

Gotta love the hysterical anons who claim you're mentally ill. It's a FICTIONAL story, calm down and take your meds before your mom calls you for bedtime.

"Not making a decision is the worst thing you can do. So long as you feel you made the right decision based on the information you had at that time, there's no need to fret about it. If it fails, you'll know what to do next time." ~ Bo Schembechler

GO BLUE!

Nothing like going all psycho killer on those pesky cheaters! 💪👃👅. Wife gets in a fender bender? Give her a little dose of poisonous mushroom. She wears white after Labor Day? Show her the pickaxe handles. There's a hair in your soup? Burn down that restaurant! Assholes deserve what they get!📿👒🎩.

Wife has overdue library books, children got an F on that report card? Throw a rattlesnake in the shower with them. We'll get rid of all this rude shit and the country will only be populated by manly men of virtue. Great story! 5*****😶😆😅🙂😁

AMerryman

Let that be a lesson to the naysayers that insist all the discovery methods have been used and there are no wild story lines out there.

Again, well done.

Excellent BTB. A pretty fresh and fun take. Two minor issues I had were that since we Shauna's perspective, it would have been nice to get her reasoning behind the affair. It didn't need to go in-depth, but she even asks herself at one point, "Why did I get involved in this?" I don't know. You tell us.

The other minor issue was that the wife still believes she had a psychotic stalker, yet figures out her husband set her up and sent the text. If she figured out the husband was actually the stalker, it would make sense she'd come to that conclusion, but if she still believes she had a stalker breaking into her home, why wouldn't she assume the STALKER had sent the text?

Anyway, looking forward to more from you. Thanks for the story.

Cog

Nice ... a very dark sinister payback ... awesome.

Very few cheaters win. A little over the top but in comparison to the willing cuckold shit posted daily this is a good read. Five Stars.

"BTB over the top not justice just a criminal himself

A divore without kids is a simple solution. This is pure criminal and evil."

You say that like it's a bad thing.

She played, she paid.

Simple, yes?

With only a hole in his kidney and a nicked ear? C'mon, twenty years for her? BTB begins to sound like fascism!

Very good. Liked it.

Great Frame, the Democrats could have used you during the Kavanaugh hearings

Annie Oakley didn't get life and knows he did it. 20 years later, she has nothing to lose.

and if Ray had been crippled for life.

It does beg the question, he never inquired about her trips in detail, never took time off to travel with her, never attempted to surprise her by showing up at one of her travel destinations? And she went from loyal loving wife to Rays fuck toy with absolutely no change in her demeanor, her attitude, her sexuality, her mannerisms? Just makes you wonder how a wife could turn into such a selfish arrogant slut with no change in personality or behavior. Makes you wonder how close and intimate the marriage really was.

But a good plot and good execution. Thank you for your time and talent.

You have a sick mind, but you write well. Those praising the outcome of the story are sick too, but you individually, have talent which shows in the telling.

Nice change of pace and good plot twist. Unique spin from what I have read on this site. Thanks for the story!

5*s

loved the hell out of it, to bad it isnt a true story might make ppl think twice before cheating. that could have easily been a murder, suicide so 20 years probably better? idk what a women's prison is like

Someone mentioned below that the epilogue should have the husband in jail. I was just wondering what legal charges he might possibly face?

All he did was send a text to her lover, tricking him into coming over to the house. The husband didn't pull the trigger and wasn't even there at the time. Yes, he was obviously hoping that events would play out the way they did, but he certainly didn't force his wife to shoot her lover.

The best I could come up with was reckless endangerment... but it seems a bit of a stretch. I think any good defence lawyer would be able to get him out of that.

Before she gets out in 5 or so years (don't you love our legal system) have him visit and tell her "yes, you are right; it was me!"

and different; I agree with the comment that her POV might have been given another crack at the end. For me the detective story aspect of how things are discovered is always a big draw and here was a great example. It reminded me a bit of a Columbo tale where the offender used a photo of himself pasted over his co-conspirator's face to trigger an automated shot of him speeding somewhere distant from where the crime was (um -- if I remember that right). I think the ability of the "stalker" to know too much about what was going on indoors would have resulted in the wife getting the hang of what was going on a bit quicker. Then she might have turned the tables by eg not actually being in bed and letting loverboy in during the night to catch hubby in the act of taking the photos etc.

I'm puzzled by the location of the shooting however, from her bed (where she pissed in it), through the bedroom door, seeing as she had locked all the doors and had not invited Ray over herself. Others have commented on the extent of the sentence -- but that's US law not for me to comment on!

But all in all an engaging plot, fun to read.

Too many guns in the hands of unstable people.

'Psycho killer'!? What the...?

'Got that bout of sarcasm out, buddy? Feel better, now that you made sure everyone (well, not everyone, but some) paid attention to the outrage you felt toward the mere idea of men (and, yes, women - BTB isn't gender bias!) not taking being cheated on lying down?

SMH... then you'll hear from some commenters that the pro-BTB crowd is full of unstable individuals. But THAT comment - yes sir, THAT was the perfect example of a well-thought-out, serene remark.

But it's JUST A JOKE, right? Nothing to take too serious. You know, exactly like this story...

Whatever you need to get yourself going, AMerryman.

My, what a devious mine that you process. Twenty years in prison for cheating. Wow, remind me not to get on your bad side. 😎. Thanks for sharing.

This was an interesting, creative story of how to get revenge. Two major lessons to get from this story. When cheating, drive very carefully and keep the guns out of the hands of cheaters. Self destruction is a sad thing.

Tiny Tim

Is a great device that is not used enough in these types of stories. Its one of the more common DV themes and really allows an author to twist the amount of disbelief a reader can endure. Full marks.

that pulled me out of it was where the wife gets 20 years for attempted murder.

If you look at the statistics, she likely would have gotten something closer to community service with time served. Women are convicted or molesting children, stabbing their boyfriends... all sorts of stuff, and they get the proverbial slap-on-the-wrist for it.

I'm not saying that because I'm of any particular political persuasion or about any particular cause. The statistics just bear that out; women get vastly reduced sentences, if they get a sentence at all, for the same crime in the same court by comparison to men. Particularly poor or black men (or poor black men).

Particularly in the UK. WTF Brits, get a handle on that.

Gun control for unstable people? Per the story, these two had all the major gun safty courses and went to the range often. Both had CCP, which is a whole different level of background check. Seem to be highly qualified gun owners. She just panicked under pressure.and still got a solid, center mass hit. She was a cheating bitch, unfortunately that doesn't disqualify you from gun ownership.

Loved the originality and the BTB. Well-crafted for a short story. Just dark enough to be in my wheelhouse.

Hooked

For those clueless people pontificating about the 20year sentence as unrealistic, do your research. From attorney dot com "First-degree attempted murder carries greater penalties and often means a life sentence with the possibility of parole. Offenders typically spend at least 10 years in prison"

Looks like moreandmore did the research

*****

Loved it, great story, great concept, masterfully executed.

See you in 20, Shauna.

Don't drop the soap. :)

Diabolical. Fucking cunt started losing her mind then she lost her freedom. No one died. Shouldn't have cheated. Oh well. Another day in fiction. A good day.

Five Stars

Ray did not get punished enough,Blake should have told his wife about her husband's affair.

Great timing and depiction of the gloom and doom as it materialized

Nice BTB tale. Nobody got killed, but the bitch got burned nonetheless. *****

an errant ricochet shot that would have hit him in his wiener and facilitated a surgical removal of the unit lol.

I'm confused by his comment

"I really do need to get some help on how to deal with the jealousy thing."

He doesn't need help. He delt with it just right on his own. 😀

5* for a great plan coming together.

Wow, what a number he did on her head. The way he had her chasing her tail I’m surprised she was lucid enough to figure out that maybe, just maybe, her husband set her up. I did question one thing. Husband printed a copy of the pic he took of her pussy, printed it out on their home printer. Most modern printers have a built-in memory. And if you know how, you can access that memory and reprint any or all those pics. If the cops had dug a little deeper that might have been problematic for good old Blake. Oh well, all’s well that ends well, I guess. Very good story. Definitely Five Star worthy.

Nice touch with gaslighting of the wife. You would think it would be used more commonly in these kinds of stories.

I disagree with the comment that a check of the printer would be an issue. The "stalker" told her on the phone he had been in the house - why not print the picture right there.

Good story - love her getting hers & the method used - sleep deprivation coupled caused by the phone calls : classic !

For the read.

Excellent story!

You play, you PAY!

As the song goes......BURN BABY BURN!!!

but how far should one go to have your reckoning, TK U MLJ LV NV

Best BTB story I’ve ever read. Clever !!!

Revenge is something to enjoy at leisure. Not rushed into.

A definite winner.

Practically every story of yours that I have read has been pure gold. These have been awesome!

Must say that was great. Turn the tables on the bitch.

See the beauty in this prose

So nice when the husband isn't lipsticked into a lifetime with his wife/another mans whore.

Maybe I missed the posts from people who have actually had a cheating spouse. Otherwise, Blake is as bad, or worse than, the wife. When I found out about my spouse's affair I had all kinds of revenge fantasies, started planning for divorce. But at the same time, the person you love is now the person you hate, they are still the person you love. IF you really loved them in the first place. In real life only the evil could inflict that kind of torture on some one they loved. Despite the blind rage, I still had too many other conflicting feelings to actually hurt my spouse. Blake purposefully tortured his wife. Can't do that if there was ever any real love,

As for the twits who think Blake was the bad guy, they've just internalized a feminized worldview that causes them to think that adultery isn't a serious crime. In the past it was, but predatory men and feminists got control of both family law and the courts and have trivialized marriage.

Great job keep it up

This story stands alone. One of the most inventive revenge plots ever in LW.

The wife was shooting through a solid door, can’t blame her if he wasn’t stand dead center in the doorway! (And yes, I wrote “dead center, on purpose)

Wouldn't worry about the jealousy thing, it served you proud. Signed: BTW

Blake did what he had to do.

@KingBandor - I don't think there's any way to trace the picture and the messages. As far as the phone calls, so they're traced to a burner phone. So what? Whether, as here, it was him setting her up, or a real stalker, it's likely a burner phone was used, doesn't incriminate him. Cell tower records? The only pertinent call was the one calling Ray over, made from their driveway, cell tower would be the same as from the house. I agree on the account business. She was obviously too panicked to think of it, and her attorney was too incompetent, as evidenced by his/her inability to get her to take the plea deal. The blood work would only have been done if there was suspicion of the drug use, and there wasn't.

@MightyHorny - Good idea about her changing her mind and shooting Ray when he insisted, but as I said to King, her lawyer was a dolt! How can Ray sue Blake over the shooting, since nobody thinks that he was involved?

@Anonymous Cog Re: Stalker - She rightly figures that why would a stalker use her burner phone to call Ray over. Supposedly the stalker wants what Ray is getting.

@VickieTern - As far as Blake is concerned, SHE'S the guilty party, Ray swore no fidelity to him. Presumably Ray's wife will extract her pond of flesh!

@Anonymous Re: "20 years for infidelity?" - WE know it's for infidelity, but in the context of the story it's for shooting Ray.

@Powersworder - Also, they would have to PROVE beyond a reasonable doubt that he set it up. A lot of conjecture, WE know it's true, but in criminal cases, it's not what you know, it's what you can prove.

I love it when a plan comes together. Hummm, 20 years for cheating, is that any different than child support for 18 years for a kid that isn't his?

Bitch got what she deserved. Good story

I love this story. These negative commenters are idiots! These commenters who don’t want the husband to get away with this are just that, idiots! It was perfect. No evidence can be connected directly to him.

I'm not sure about moving half the investments to cash in advance. It does tip his hand if the police checked. However, he could say he was preparing for some other type of investment. Good story. Gas light her and then let her dish out revenge on them both. I like it!

Only problem is , that when she does get out she may come looking for some payback

Reading again. Perfect revenge on both cheaters. Twenty years for infidelity sounds reasonable. At least he didn't kill her.

Your stories are very original, this one was excellent.

Thanks for writing and sharing!

Great set up. BTB!!!

Great story, very creative. A little extreme for the cheating slut, but on the flip-side, there is no downside to cheaters anymore. The sluts get half or more of their cuckold husbands assets and he gets all the pain and agony of her cheating. 5 stars

The BTB crowd will never view any punishment as too much. But the results here were extreme and criminal. Please recall the girl who was criminally charged for convincing her boyfriend to commit suicide. There are ways to turn the law on these things. Perverting the law for revenge is not my thing.

There is also very little on why the adultery occured. Sometimes women cheat because their husbands are the problem, and divorce is out of the question for family or financial reasons.

Would have been a 6* but for a few misses. Did Ray's wife divorce him?

Since Shauna confessed to the CHEATING (as a lame defense), what about her families/friends attitudes?

What about the tie-in of the truck accident report? I assume there were no kids in either family. 4* only