All Comments on 'A Moment in Time'

by potsherd22

Sort by:
  • 11 Comments
The_PedantThe_Pedantalmost 9 years ago
Nice!

A well written tale, which I enjoyed.

I would have liked it to be a bit longer, though, with more fleshing out of the characters.

fanfarefanfarealmost 9 years ago
That last sentance...

...I consider it a strong ending but everyone thinks I'm peculiar.

However, it is very bad advice. Abandoning the inherited estate without specific legal actions such as a formal disclaimer. Though I doubt if that would be sufficient for Sally to escape Death Duties and whatever property taxes are due or will come due on the estate.

In addition, even posting legal notices of non-liability probably would be insufficient for Sally to avoid being billed for non-payment of utilities, association fees, mortgage payments, or liability at law if there is say, a slip&fall lawsuit or other civil action against the property and recorded owners.

After all, Sally's sister and brother-in-law are religious believers. Which means they are incapable of even the most basic intellectual effort of common sense at either morality or ethical behavior.

MitchFraellMitchFraellalmost 9 years ago
Very good

Well described and enjoyable to read. Thanks

chytownchytownalmost 9 years ago
Thanks***

For the read,

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago
A fine start

I was surprised at the relatively abrupt ending - the story seemed well started, with some real character development. Two lost souls forging a relationship - the story begs for more. I urge Potsherd to develop it further. Sally fighting for her rights, a solicitor who is a good customer helping the the of them etc. The story thus far is well written - keep it going!

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago

Pleasant read. Did not mind the lack of erotica.

Then again, her sister ought to buy Sally's share of the house.

potsherdpotsherdalmost 9 years ago
the customer is always right

Funny, I thought it was a complete short story, but some reader responses are making me rethink. I have two stories in the pipeline, but then I shall come back to write part 2. Thanks for reading my stuff, and thanks even more for constructive criticism.

Potsherd.

LadyVerLadyVeralmost 9 years ago
Excellent story

I appreciate good stories that are one page. Well done.

AnonymousAnonymousalmost 9 years ago

Thank you.

You took a slice of life as it usually is and worked it into the shape it should be. Has the flavour if Ohenry to it.

Well worth the time of a read and worth well more than the 5 I was able to give it.

AncientTravellerAncientTravellerabout 8 years ago
An excellent miniature

A little rainy day story that somehow brings out a smile.

rightbankrightbankover 7 years ago
I agree with Fanfare

If the estate is to be split according to the will, the sister and brother in law should buy her out. Worst case, she lets them have it, they give to the church.

lose, lose.

and Sally needs some serious counselling help.

Anonymous
Our Comments Policy is available in the Lit FAQ
Post as:
Anonymous