A Month in the Heart...

"Gimme the butter," he muttered, and I heard footsteps. I opened my eyes and saw Steve leaning down with the butter dish in his hand. Chris took it from him and then I felt his fingers smearing the slippery, soft butter deep into the crack of my naked bum. His fingertips brushed against my tight, quivering anus. Now, I lost all doubt about what they wanted to do to me, or what Chris at any rate wanted to do to me, and I was scared. I craned my head over my shoulder and saw Chris taking his engorged cock out of his jeans and kneeling behind me.

"Oh god, no," I gasped, really not wanting him to do it, wanting to keep my dignity, my virginity, my masculinity. Was this really going to be my first experience of sex - to have my supposed friends strip me naked and use me like their sex doll? I started to get up on my hands and knees, but Danny went on his knees and grabbed my arms, holding me down. I looked up at him, terrified.

"No!" I begged him. "Please!" But then I felt Chris mounting my naked hips from behind. I was on my belly, reared up on my elbows, Danny holding me down on the floor.

'Seriously, Alex,' Danny said quietly, 'it's gonna be a lot easier if you don't fight it.'

'I don't know if I want this,' I moaned, feeling shaky and scared. Chris paused behind me.

'You said yes,' said Chris impatiently. Danny glanced at him sharply, and then looked at me, holding my hands gently.

'Okay,' he said softly, 'let's stop a second. We don't want to do anything to you that you don't want us to do. Right, guys?'

I stared at the carpet, feeling weepy and ashamed of myself; here I was, naked on my belly in front of my friends and I'd already begged one of them to use me, and now I was pulling out of it. I didn't want to let them down. But I was scared, most of all of what it meant about me that I was doing this.

'Of course we don't,' Chris said eventually, in a quiet voice. 'Listen, Alex, it's okay. We thought you wanted to go there.'

'What are you scared of?' Danny asked me. 'Tell us.'

I was quiet for a long time, listening to myself, trying to figure it out.

'I'm scared it'll hurt,' I finally admitted. 'I don't want to get injured.'

'It doesn't have to hurt,' said Danny. 'We've got shitloads of lube. It doesn't have to hurt at all.'

'You promise?' I asked, looking up at him. He nodded.

'It might sting a bit,' he said. 'But the more you relax, the less it'll sting. We just...we just thought you were so fucking hot that we wanted you.'

'Seriously, Alex,' said Chris, 'you're so fucking cute.'

'Seriously hot,' agreed Peter.

'Since when?' I asked, the pleasure of being flattered overcoming for a moment my pride and dignity.

'Since whenever,' said Chris. 'Hardly anybody's 100% straight. Most of us don't ever get to act on it, though. We thought that since we're all here, it might be cool to try acting on it.'

'With me,' I said over my shoulder, but my fear was ebbing and the secret delight in being desired was starting to well up in me again.

'Of course you,' said Chris, and I felt his hands stroking my bare legs and I gave a little gasp.

'Ahh...why?'

'Why do you think, Alex?' said Peter, grinning. 'It's because you're the only one of us that we all fancy.'

Chris' legs moved up to my thighs and I was blushing like mad because the nearness of his hands to my bare ass was making me very aroused, once again, and I was excruciatingly, delectably ashamed that I could be so turned on by my male friends admitting that they fancied me.

'So you just thought you'd make me your girl for the week, is that it?' I said, breathing heavily, blushing and smiling despite myself.

'Sounds good to me,' admitted Peter.

'But I don't get to do the same to any of you?'

'Who knows what'll happen?' said Danny with a smile. 'But for now...is that something that you think you'd like to do?'

'What,' I said, glancing at them all and closing my eyes momentarily and moaning softly as Chris's hands massaged my slippery buttocks, then looking at them again, 'I just let you all use me as a girl all night?' I was actually squirming slightly with the pleasure and prospect of it, my body betraying what I wanted deep down, despite the tone of my words.

'It does look awfully like that's what you want, Alex,' said Danny softly.

'Oooohh,' I moaned and lowered my cropped head as Chris stroked my ass, pushing a finger between my buttocks, touching me more intimately than anyone had ever touched me. 'Ohhh god.'

'So that's you giving your consent, then?' said Danny.

I let Chris finger me for a few more moments, and then I felt a sense of peace flow through me as I accepted what was happening, accepted that what I wanted more than anything else was to let my friends use me however they wanted; to be a piece of meat for one night, an available sexy body for them to use as they wished, instead of just a guy among other guys, with all the game-playing and status and bullshit that guys did.

'Yes,' I said, raising my head and shutting my eyes.

'Oh, Alex,' Chris gasped, 'you are so going to get fucked tonight.'

'Yes please,' I breathed. Danny held my hands. I felt Chris mounting me, his weight on me, and then the presence of his hot penis pushing between my warm, slippery buttocks, urging up towards my most secret and private place -

I squirmed. Danny gripped my hands tightly. 'Oh, fuck,' I gasped. Chris's cock tip was pressing at me, forcing my bum apart. I could feel him directing himself where he wanted to go. It was going to happen, he was going do it.

'God, that looks hot,' someone said.

'I'm gonna do it,' Chris grunted. He leaned his weight on my hips, then he reached up and clamped his hands over my eyes and hauled himself forward into me, his cock tip surging up into my anus, stabbing me.

'AAAAUUHH!' I squealed, because it did hurt -- it stung deeply. But then, I felt him splitting me and the shaft of his cock sliding up inside my rectum, penetrating me, violating me forever, taking my virginity. And it was suddenly different.

I screamed once again as Chris slid up into me and Danny murmured soothing reassurances into my ear, but I could do nothing, and the last ounce of resistance went out of me as the pressure of Chris's cock deep inside me made my own cock go rock hard and ache for relief. Because yes, I was aroused. It's not unusual for rape victims to experience orgasm during the assault, but I was not fighting it anymore, I was not experiencing it as rape. I moaned thickly, letting the huge wave of sensation flood through me, the piercingly painful and yet thick feeling of Chris's cock up my arse and his hands over my eyes making me wallow in my role as convenient piece of meat, pure flesh, just a hole for Chris to fuck so that he could get his rocks off.

"How does that feel, Alex?" Chris gasped as he buggered me.

"Ohh-hh-hh..." I moaned. "Ohhh god...ohhh yessss..."

There were murmurs of approval and excitement from the others.

"Oh god, Alex, that feels fucking great," Chris gasped as he pumped his hips into my naked rear, mounted on top of me as I lay on my belly on the carpet, naked underneath him.

"Oh fuuuuck..." I whimpered. I was keeping my eyes closed because it was happening, the ultimate violation of me, I was naked and on my belly in front of the guys and one of them was using me like a girl, and I was not only not even trying to resist but I was getting off on it. A part of me was standing back from myself, amazed that I was finding this arousing, amazed that I was using the muscles in my rectum to milk Chris's cock, trying to urge him to come inside my arse, to fuck me up my bum, to use me in a way that I had never ever dreamed of being used.

"Oh, ummmfff, god, guys, oh please," I moaned as I squirmed helpless and naked beneath Chris, and although I partly meant it to beg them not to go too fast, to give me time to absorb what was happening to me, they seemed to take it as an invitation. Because the next thing I knew, a cock was pressing at my lips and I was obliged to let it into my mouth. Hands gripped the sides of my cropped head and my face was buried in a groin as whoever it was began to fuck my mouth.

Now I was being fucked at each end I had no choice but to give in to what was happening to me. I had an image of myself as a naked, squirming boy being spit-roasted by two bigger, clothed young men and I found that I was weeping with arousal. My cock was stiff beneath me, pressed into the carpet. Whoever's cock was in my mouth was large and it was as much as I could do to keep it where I could manage it, licking and sucking on it deliriously as its owner pumped it into my face. "Mmm, mm, mm, mm, mm..." I moaned as my body was jolted and shaken by the fucking I was receiving at each end.

The force of Chris's pole of muscle shoved up my anus was overwhelming, and I no longer had any strength to pretend that I was not deeply excited by what he was doing to me. I had got up that morning as a heterosexual teenager, but now, over twelve hours later, I was the naked bitch for a group of guys, their helpless cock-slave.

Whoever was fucking my face made a repeated grunting noise, grasping his own prick and jerking on it, and he pulled it out of my mouth. I blinked and then moaned as his cock erupted cum over my face, the sticky white semen blinding me. He stuck his cock back in my mouth for the last of it and I licked it up and swallowed the unfamiliar salty white goo. I had tasted my own cum, experimentally. Swallowing somebody else's was quite different.

I couldn't see but I guessed that it had been Danny whose cock I'd been sucking. The sight of him coming over my face must have put Chris over the edge, because he snorted and pushed hard into my arse, making me whimper with pain, and then I felt him coming deep inside me, his warm semen flooding into my rectum. He sagged as he did so, his weight and soft belly pressing onto my naked hips, and I moaned as I felt him deliver his final domination of me deep into my arse. Danny slipped out from in front of me and I lay face down on the carpet as Chris spurted the last of his cum in me, then he pulled out and stood up.

I lay prone, shaking, my eyes closed; naked and violated; breathless and scared; my body tingling with the ache and sensation of being buggered but also with the helpless satisfaction of orgasm. Because, as Chris had being coming inside me, I too had ejaculated, uselessly, over the carpet, for all the other guys to see.

My anus was tingling and throbbing and aching. I felt sticky all over and the sweat was cooling on my naked body. I lay there for a second, recovering, but also letting them look at me, letting them see that I had accepted it, letting them take in the sight of me, naked and sweaty and sticky and fucked.

Then I reached up and wiped the sticky cum out of my eyes, and I knelt on the floor. Someone handed me a damp tissue and I wiped my face thoroughly, still breathing heavily, still nude, still ever so present as the boy who was being the bitch for all the other boys. When my eyes were clear, I opened them and looked at the others.

Chris was slumped in a chair, panting, sated, lighting a cigarette. Danny was likewise satisfied-looking, wiping his cock and sitting back in his chair and sipping his drink.

My own cock was now semi-erect and a thread of cum linked me to the carpet. I wiped it and wiped the carpet, too. I looked at the others, blushing, smiling.

'Who wants to go next?' I asked.

'You want to do it some more?' said Danny.

'Why not?' I said.

'We thought you'd just do maybe one of us,' said Ray.

'If I'm gonna be your girl for the night,' I said, 'I should take it seriously, shouldn't I?'

'Would you like to have me?' asked Steve quietly. I considered it, and smiled. I liked Steve.

'Sure,' I said.

'Then I think I'd like it if you maybe had a shower?' he said. 'I don't really want to smell Danny and Chris on you.'

'Okay,' I said and stood up. I could feel them watching me. I liked the feel of their gaze on me.

'I'm going to have a shower, now,' I said. 'I won't be long.'

I walked, naked, out of the living room, and up the stairs, aware of what I'd done, aware of what I was doing, knowing that I was consciously being their slut. My asshole was pulsing gently and I felt incredibly satisfied, and yet at the same time I wanted to see what would happen if I could seduce them all, get them all to fuck me. Now that there seemed to be no escape from my role on this trip as the piece of meat, the cute boi, I wanted to play it to the hilt and see how it suited me. I had felt tired and a little drunk; now I felt energised and scared and ready for anything.

I went to the bathroom and the first thing I did was sit on the toilet and shit. Then it occurred to me, as I was wiping my ass, that I might try to clean myself out a bit, if the other guys were planning on taking me.

Some rummaging around in the bathroom cabinets yielded a white box with a sticker on it saying 'enema kit'.

I looked at it, considered the situation, and thought that either the guys had been very prepared, or else we just happened to have rather strange hosts. I filled the bag with warm, mildly soapy water, and squirted it inside myself until I felt full -- then, gasping, I shat the water into the toilet. I went a couple more times just to be safe, then I washed the kit out and stowed it away and got under the shower. I felt clean and purified and cleansed and ready for anything they wanted to do.

Only after a while did I become aware that two or three of them had entered in the room and talking quietly. I pulled back the curtain.

Steve, Ray and Pete were sitting, drinking, waiting for me. I was shampooing my cropped hair.

'You like to watch, then,' I said.

'We told you, Alex,' said Ray, grinning, 'you're the only one we all fancy.'

'Danny and Chris not up to it?' I asked, blinking water out of my eyes.

'They're totally done,' Pete said. 'They've gone to bed.'

'I've gotta say, Alex,' said Steve, 'respect to you for doing this.'

'Big time,' said Ray, and they all clinked glasses.

'You thought I wouldn't do it,' I said.

'Of course we did,' Steve said. 'I mean, yeah...we didn't think you were gay. I mean, I'm not even sure what that means. Are you gay?'

I stood naked under the water, feeling it running off my body, and thought about it for a moment.

'I don't know,' I said truthfully. 'I don't think so. I mean, I've never fancied a guy in my life. But yeah, I don't know quite what it means. I mean, I like...you guys fancying me. I like how it feels. I like that you find me sexy.'

'But if we went downstairs and there were six naked girls,' said Ray, 'would you want to fuck them or would you want us to fuck you?'

'I think I'd want us all to take pot luck,' I said, grinning.

'You're a perve, Alex,' said Pete sardonically.

'Maybe so,' I said, 'but you're the one watching me shower.'

'The reason I'm watching you shower,' he said, 'is that to me, you're a girl in a guy's body. I don't fancy you like I'd fancy a guy. I fancy you like I'd want a girl.'

I eyed him, and he winked at me. Pete was tall and rangy and athletic, as well as bigger and stronger than me. I wondered exactly what he had in mind for me.

But then I was clean, and I grabbed a towel and wrapped it around myself. The guys stood up as I walked out of the bathroom and stood on the landing, blushing, smiling at them.

'So,' I said. 'Does someone want to go next?'

'Me,' said Steve. He grabbed my hand and pulled me along the corridor. I managed a smile over my shoulder at Pete and Ray, but then Steve had pulled me into his room.

'Alex,' he said, 'I gotta admit, I'm just really, really horny. I'm desperate. I can't make with a lot of lovey-dovey stuff.'

'That's okay,' I said, shrugging. 'You just tell me what to do.'

'Take off your towel,' he said, 'and get on the bed on your hands and knees.'

I obediently dropped the towel and climbed naked onto the bed. Steve wasted no time. In a matter of seconds he was smearing lube over my ass and I was gasping and feeling myself starting to get hard again.

'Oh god,' I moaned.

'I'll be as gentle as I can,' he gasped, inserting a finger into me, loosening me up again, and I whimpered, and then he was quickly stripping to his boxers and getting up behind me and then I felt his cock tip pushing between my tight buttocks, and I shivered with anticipation, and then he pulled his finger out of me and pushed.

Steve's cock was long and narrow and I managed to let him in without too much pain. I gasped as he entered me and then I felt his long fullness filling my bowel as he began to ass-fuck me. It didn't take me long to respond and soon I was fully erect, kneeling before him submissively.

There was little affection or tenderness in it, just a certain unwillingness to hurt me. Steve just wanted to fuck, and I was the only convenient and willing hole. He gripped my hips and pumped into my ass for about three minutes while I whimpered and moaned, face down on the sheet before him, and then he was coming inside me and I let out a long 'Aaaaaaahuuuuhhhhh...' as I felt his semen fill my rectum.

'Oh god...' he gasped as he came, and then he pulled out of me and I sagged, burying my face in the sheet, feeling seriously used for the first time that night, especially as I hadn't come myself.

Steve wrapped himself in his sheet and muttered 'Thanks, Alex, you can go,' and then he laid his head on the pillow and began to breath regularly.

I felt a little shaky and weak. I got off the bed, feeling Steve's cum leaking out of my throbbing ass, and I gathered up my towel around myself and left his room.

I went down the landing and back into the bathroom, where I washed myself off once more. While I was doing so, I felt the door open and I looked up.

Ray was there, a glass of wine in his hand, his face flushed, smiling down at me.

'So Steve's been, has he?'

'He's not exactly a romantic,' I muttered.

'He doesn't appreciate you like we do,' said Ray.

'I don't think any of you fucking realise,' I said, 'that I woke up this morning totally straight, and now I've been fucked twice up my ass and once in my mouth. It's...fuck, I mean...'

I stopped washing myself and sat for a moment, naked on the edge of the bath, resting my face in my hands.

Ray sat next to me and put his arm around me.

'It's because you're so, hot, Alex,' he murmured, and kissed the back of my neck. 'We can't contain ourselves.'

'It's a lot to take in,' I said quietly. Ray hugged me and kissed the back of my neck some more. Being told that I was attractive seemed to have a magical power to heal my doubts and resentments. Even as Ray told me I was cute, I felt my anger towards Steve melting away.

I sat up and looked at Ray. Even this situation was bizarre; there I was, the no-longer-virgin sex toy of the group, sitting naked next to Ray who was fully clothed, wondering what he wanted to do with me, quite prepared to let him do it.

'So what do you want with me?' I asked, feeling myself blush.

'I thought,' said Ray, 'we'd try something a little different. For one thing, I'm not totally crazy about this.'

He fingered the sparse hair on my chest and my groin. I looked at him with surprise.

'What were you thinking of doing about it?' I asked.

'Kneel,' he said to me, and I slid to the floor on my knees.

Ten minutes later I was kneeling on the bathroom floor, naked and docile; my face, chest, belly, groin, legs, back and buttocks completely obliterated under a coating of shaving foam, and Ray was methodically shaving me.

I felt his razor skimming my eyebrows. 'Please,' I gasped, 'be careful.'

'I'm being very careful,' he murmured. 'I just don't want any hair between you and me. But you want me to keep the eyebrows?'