A New Perspective Pt. 03

Cass surprised me with a smile. "Tara knows what happened to you. She was actually the first person to offer her support when she heard."

My head jerked back in surprised. "She what? Why?! Even after what I did to her?"

Another voice sounded from behind Cassandra.

"Because, I've learned to forgive you for what you've done to me, and I know exactly how you're feeling right now."

Cass moved aside to let another girl into the bathroom. She was a tiny girl, about as tall as me, but slender. Where I was all curves and boobs, she was lean muscle. Her brunette hair was shaved on both sides of her head, with a long flop on top. I felt my heart sink.

"I heard what happened." She said with a sad smile. Her voice had a light, country twang to it that made me think of wheat filled fields and jars of tea. "I thought I'd come up and see how you were doing."

I remembered her alright, and I felt terrible for not recognizing her at first. We had met my sophomore year, and I was instantly attracted to her. She had an almost fairy like appearance, and I had a thing for short girls. Eh, explains why I'm short, now that I think about it. We had 'hit' it off instantly, but in reality, I just wanted to fuck her. And I did.

Memories of that night came flooding back, and I realized with horror that it was an almost mirrored replica of my dream. I had raped her, violently. Oh my god, what have I done?

Getting up, I walked slowly to her, my head down in shame. When I reached her, I surprised both of us by wrapping my arms gently around her.

"There are no words to convey how sorry I am." I whispered, my voice shaking. "I can't even begin to describe how much I regret what I did. I am so, so sorry for destroying you like that. There isn't an excuse in the world that I can give you to justify it, and I won't even try. I'm so sorry, Tara."

After a moment, I felt her arms hug me as well, and I felt a sob wrack her body. "I had hoped and prayed for a long time that I'd hear those words out of your mouth." She said, her voice muffled by my shoulder. "After it happened, I tried killing myself twice. The coven saved me both times, thankfully. I spent months dreaming of you dead, as bad as that sounds."

Pulling back, I could see that her face was wet with tears, her eyes bright with gratitude. I shook my head, squeezing her shoulder. "I understand why, now, and I don't blame you one bit for it. I probably deserved that sort of hate from you after what I did. Let's go sit down, if you're ok with that."

She nodded, and the four of us moved back into the bedroom, with Tara and I sitting cross legged on the floor across from each other. Bella sat behind me on the bed, and Cassandra leaned back against the wall, her arms crossed.

"I know you've probably explained a thousand times already what happened." Tara said softly, apologies in her eyes. "But if you're comfortable with it, I'd like to hear it."

"I'm don't think I'll ever be comfortable with it, but I think it's the least I can do to make up for what I've done."

At her nod, I retold the dream. My voice didn't waver this time, but I know the anxiety was evident, because I couldn't stop tapping my fingers on my thigh. Part way through, Tara reached over and grabbed my hand, holding it in a gesture of support. When I got to the very detailed part, I felt her hand squeeze tight, but she said nothing, her hazel eyes locked on mine. She was my rock in the stormy seas, and I was eternally grateful for that. Once I finished, she loosened her grip, smiling her apology at me.

"I'm sorry to hear that you went through that. Like Cassandra said, nobody deserves that sort of experience, not even you. I'm not going to lie, a small part of me feels immense satisfaction that you...let's say 'got a taste of your own medicine.' And I am sorry about that."

"It's not wrong to feel that way." I surprised both of us with the strength of my voice. "I don't blame you one bit for feeling like I got what I deserved, because what I did to you was wrong on every level out there."

Tara nodded, relief on her face. "Thank you for understanding. I want to ask a few questions, if I can. And I apologize in advance if they seem harsh, but I think you'll agree that you owe me some answers."

Taking a deep breath, I nodded, squeezing her hand back before letting go.

"I guess the first question is, why?"

I immediately understood the implications of what she was asking. Why did I do it?

"I don't have a solid answer for you on that. I think it's partly because I just could. I was bigger, stronger, and used to getting my way. My dad was always bringing girls home, and he was telling me how they enjoyed every moment of their time with him. I misread that, thinking that girls like it no matter what, even if they don't at first. And, above all of that, I think it's because I refused to take no for an answer. I demanded respect from everyone else, but refused to return it."

"Why didn't you apologize earlier? Why did it take it happening to you for you to realize what you had done?"

"Because I was a child in a mans body." I responded simply. "I had anger issues, and I didn't hold myself accountable for my actions. If I saw something I wanted, I took it, with no regard for anybody. Even after the change, I spent the first couple days wondering what I had done to deserve this. Why me? That was the bottom line. It was all about me."

"And now?" She prompted. I shrugged, looking down.

"Now it's a struggle. Brent still exists within me, as a part of me, and he's angry that we're being called out. It's something I'm going to have to fight on my own, and I'm not looking forward to it. The shame that I feel right now from realizing what I've done is almost too much to handle. It makes me want to shut down and turn into the cold person again. But I think I've accepted that it won't make anything easier for me."

"No, it won't." Tara agreed. "But you're on your way. You've taken the first step on the road to recovery, and that's the hardest step. Am I glad that you were changed into a girl and forced to see the consequences of your actions? Like I said, partially yes. But I'm glad in the sense that who you really are is coming to light."

"Who I am?" I asked, my brow furrowing.

"Like I said earlier, Faith, witches have a way of looking into someones heart." Cassandra said, and my gaze shifted to her. "When we looked into yours, we were expecting someone that was doing this all for pleasure and nothing else. But we found pain and turmoil, along with something buried deep inside. It's why we gave you this chance."

"Chance? Why did you tout it as a punishment, then?"

All three of them laughed, sharing looks with each other. "It was a fear tactic, Faith." Bella piped up from behind me. "Do you really think they'd do this to me without my consent? I knew about the plan from the day it was conceived."

"Bella was your number one supporter." Cass said, smiling at the younger girl. "She convinced us to give you a chance, saying that under it all, you were scared."

I almost argued. It was such a pure instinct that I opened my mouth to do so. But I shut it and thought for a moment. I was scared. That much I had realized over the past couple of days. I was scared that I would never reach the level my dad was at. I was fearful that he would never be proud of me. My dad wasn't one for words, and whenever I got a trophy at school, he'd just mutter some sort of good job and move on. I was always trying to be like him, to impress him. So yeah, Bella was right.

I was extremely scared. Turning around, I offered a small smile to her. "Thank you." I said quietly, meeting her gaze. "It means a lot to me to hear that."

She just beamed at me, love on her face. "I know you better than you know yourself, girl. I've got your back."

Turning back to Tara, I sighed deeply, biting my lip. "I guess, in the end, an apology is all I can do. And I am truly sorry."

"And I forgive you." She said, smiling. "But you can do more. You can always do more." Her words hit me like a hammer, and it took me a minute to process them.

"You...you forgive me? After what I did to you? Why?!"

"Because you can't live with hate in your heart, Faith. Things may not happen for a reason, as what you did should have never happened. But if it didn't happen, you wouldn't be here on a path that will help you find who you are. And because I can feel the pain that it's causing you. So again, I forgive you. And thank you for being honest with me. You've helped me in more ways than you'll ever know."

Getting to her feet, she helped me up as well.

"Now what?" I asked, laughing nervously.

"Now you continue on with your journey. And if you ever need anyone to talk to when your nightmares get too much, I'm down the lower level. Room 101. Never hesitate to knock, alright?"

After she left, Cassandra came over and gave me a hug. "You know, when we were dating, I knew there was something else underneath all of that macho attitude."

Frowning, I said nothing. She just laughed and kissed my forehead. "The funeral has been pushed back a day, due to 'technical errors.' You and Bella can head out tomorrow to finish everything, alright? I'm proud of you, Faith. You can do this." With that, she too exited the room, leaving Bella and I alone.

"What say you about ordering some food and binge watching a show?" Bella asked, patting the bed next to her.

I thought about it for a moment, then shook my head. Walking to her, I grabbed her hand, pulling her to her feet. Laying a hand on the center of her chest, I looked up into those beautiful chestnut eyes. "Can...can I ask a favor of you?" I whispered, my voice shaking again.

"Anything for you, baby girl." She said, stroking my cheek.

"I need to feel alive right now. After that dream, I need to know that I'm ok. Can you help me feel that?"

Bella smiled again, with such love and admiration it made my heart ache. "Like I said, anything for my baby girl." She said, lowering her lips to mine.

This kiss was different from any other I had experienced. It was slow and passionate, something I had felt before. But there was more. There was true love, trust, and a sense of belonging in it. I felt myself melt into her, safe and warm. Our hands didn't roam at all. I kept mine on her waist, and she had hers on my shoulders. I poured my heart into that kiss, and for the first time in my life, I let go. I let go of all my fears, my need to belong. I let myself not only enjoy the love this girl was offering, but the trust she had in me.

Pulling back, she rested her forehead on mine, wiping the tears that were dripping down my face. "What's the matter, Faith?" She whispered. "I see those tears far too often in your eyes."

Closing my eyes, I let myself bask in the warmth of her body. "I'm so scared, Bella. I don't know what's going to happen, or where my life is going to take me. I'm scared that the scope of my sins is going to become quickly apparent to me, and I'm afraid I won't make it through. I barely remember what I did to Tara. How am I going to deal with everything else?"

"By knowing that you aren't that person anymore." She said simply with a smile. "You can be better than him. You can be more than him, and that's why he's so angry. He's angry and scared of change. Don't let him win, Faith."

Nodding, I sucked in a breath, burying my head in her chest. "Help me feel alive, Bella." I said softly. "Show me that I can be loved."

Saying nothing, she sat down, pulling me onto her lap. Locking lips with me, she let her hands roam gently up and down my back, mindful of my still fragile state of mind. I sighed, letting myself melt into her amazingly soft lips. When I felt comfortable, I broke the kiss, tipping my head up so she had access to my neck. She kissed gently down my jaw before reaching my neck. Unlike my dream, where my male counterpart was rough and tumble with me, Bella was sweet and caring. She kept in mind what I had gone through, but my sighs and moans only stirred her on.

Pulling a hand around me, she traced it up my stomach, leaving little trails of pleasure as she went. I still had my shirt on with the exposed shoulder, so she took the opportunity and pulled it down a little further, tracing a thumb over my nipple. This girl was playing my body like a violin, and I was loving every moment of it.

"Lay down, baby girl." She murmured, gently pushing me to the side. As she got above me, I had expected to feel some sort of fear or anxiety about this situation. Instead, the love and trust in her beautiful brown eyes eased me better than I could have ever hoped for. After pulling my shirt off, she undid my bra, tossing it to the side of the bed.

She then kissed my neck again, working her way down my collarbone. Her teeth nipped here and there, a playful tease compared to the brute in my dream. I was moaning freely now, my body responding to her masterful touch. But it was heating up in a different way. Unlike before, where I went from 0-60 in two seconds flat, this was a lazy climb. My pussy was getting wet, but the warmth spreading from it was slow and calm, spreading throughout my body in soft, even waves. When she reached my breasts, she latched onto one with her lips, sucking gently while swirling her tongue around. I ran my hands through her hair, my eyes closed and lips parted slightly.

She switched to the other breast, causing me to tighten my grip a bit on her hair. Her eyes locked on mine, and I nodded my head at the unspoken question. You can go further if you want. Getting the ok, she kissed down the center of my chest and tummy, causing me to both giggle and moan. As she reached my hips, I raised them up, expecting her to pull my jeans off. Instead, she scooted down, kissing the inside of my leg. Starting at the knee, she used her teeth to nip here and there, and the feel of her lips through the jeans was heavenly. By the time she reached my groin area, my body was relaxed, happy, and VERY horny.

Her hands moved to undo my pants, and I lifted my hips to ease them off. After she had them detached from me and tossed to the side, she lowered her nose to my crotch, inhaling deeply.

"Damn, Faith." She said, her voice husky. "I never thought my best friends pussy would smell so fucking good."

I bit my lip shyly, my fingers tracing my erect nipples. "Don't be afraid to take a taste, Bel." I said softly, my pussy aching in anticipation.

"Don't mind if I do." She murmured. Before I could respond, she latched her mouth onto my clit, panties be damned. My hips tried lifting from the bed, but her strong hands held them down, so I was reduced to a guttural "Fuuuuuccckkkk", my head dropping back to the bed. I heard her chuckle as she sucked and nipped at the sensitive nub through my underwear, and her finger lightly trailed up and down my pussy. This girl was driving me fucking crazy!

Her tongue did lazy circles around my clit, and the feeling of that plus the material of my panties only added to the exquisite sensation. I let one of my hands rest on her head, running my fingers through her full hair. She was still going slow, keeping it sensual and relaxing. I could already feel an orgasm starting to build, but this was a gradual climb up the hill. The heat in my belly increased slowly, like a slow cooker warming up. Every inch of my body was turned on, and everything felt good. The sheets on my back, my fingers now tweaking my nipples. Hell, even running my fingers through Bellas hair felt fucking amazing. I had never felt this turned on before, and I was amazed at how relaxing this type of sex could be.

But it did come. And so did I. The orgasm built and built before the dam burst. It started in my tummy and spread from there, enveloping me in a cocoon of pleasure. Every inch of my body was on fire, and I felt my thighs clamp around Bellas head as I let out a series of squeaks and moans. My brain went blank, lost in the sea of bliss that this beautiful girl had given me. The love I felt from her swamped over me, and my heart sung with happiness. THIS is what people mean when they say they feel loved.

But she wasn't done yet. Before I was even down from the first orgasm, she shimmied my panties off my hips, taking a deep whiff of my girl cum before tossing them off to the side. Scooting up my body, she lifted me up slightly, kissing me deeply as she undid my bra. Pulling both it and my shirt off, she laid me back down gently.

"You're so beautiful, Faith." She whispered, staring into my eyes. I half expected myself to bristle at the comment. I even felt Brent scoff in my head. But me? I actually blushed at it. The way she said it, with such love and emotion, made my stomach flutter. In the non sexual way, of course. I mean, she could make it do that, too. But...yeah.

So I shyly bit my lip, unsure of what to say to such a comment. Giggling, she kissed my nose, making me scrunch it up. "And you're so damn cute, too!" She said, winking at me.

"I am not cute!" I said, huffing. "I am fierce, and fiery, and...oh my jesus fucking christ." I trailed off. Bella had slid a hand down below, and right as I was about to defend what masculinity I had left, she slid one, long finger up my pussy, causing my brain functions to cease. Giggling again, she kissed me. "You talk too much, Faith. Just sit back and let me take care of you."

I didn't have the willpower to respond, so she brought her mouth back to my chest, lightly flicking her tongue over my nipples. Another finger joined the first one, and her thumb moved to my clit, moving in circles around it. I may not have been as vocal as I was with Violet, but I was still vocal nonetheless.

"Oh my god, Bella. Please don't stop. Fuck...god, your fingers feel so good. Little deeper...OHFUCK yes...please, baby. Don't stop."

Faster and faster she pumped her fingers, adding a third one so that my pussy felt nice and full. She was pumping hard now, and my hips raised up to meet each thrust. I could feel another orgasm coming. This one was going to be stronger than the last, and I was perfectly fine with that. Pulling her lips off my nipple with a 'pop!', Bella crushed her mouth against mine in a show of passion, kissing me deeply. I felt her tongue dueling with my own, and the act only added to the fire that was building in my tummy.

Breaking the kiss, Bella stared into my eyes deeply, and I felt like I could see into her soul. That beautiful soul, the one that's been there for me no matter what. The girl who stood by me when others didn't, and who was patient with me despite my shortcomings. The love in those eyes overwhelmed me, and I felt myself on the edge. Bella brought her lips to my ear, and whispered "I love you, Faith. Cum for me baby girl."

I came unwound. My orgasm hit me like a freight train, and my body arched up on a wild, high scream. She captured my mouth again, and that scream echoed into the kiss. My pussy clenched so hard it literally pushed her fingers out, and I heard my fluids dripping onto the bed. I couldn't breath, couldn't think, not with the explosions that were going on in my brain. Higher and higher I went, my body being pushed to the limits with the biggest orgasm I had ever felt in my life.

I finally collapsed, my chest heaving hard and sweat covering my body. Bella just stroked my hair, waiting for my body to calm down. Aftershocks jolted me here and there, my body trembling with each one. Laying down next to me, this beautiful girl gently rolled me over, laying my head on her chest. I curled into her, warm and safe and happy. If this is what love and home felt like, then sign me up. She pulled the covers over us, and I did a little happy wiggle at the warmth. Giggling, she kissed my head.

"Get some sleep, hun." She said softly to me, and I nodded, already trailing off.