All Comments on 'A Perfect Summer Day Ch. 01'

Rewrite a generally fair story and remove the anal sex, it kills the full plot.

Yes, your story needs some editing, (for clunky language), but the anal is fine. Four stars.

Maybe try working with one of Lit's volunteer editors next time...?

xx

I think it's agreed that you do need some work on your story but don't get discouraged. For your first one you did a good job building up to Lexi and Ava on the couch. Of course anal is good but then again, incorporate that along with alittle more pussy, clit and nipple play. Maybe for a future story, them taking a weekend and going camping where they can skinny dip, enjoy eachother around the fire. Anyway, good first story.

I dunno what everyone else is complaining about - I liked the story just fine. Sure, it could use a little fleshing out, but it was still well-paced and very erotic. Looking forward to reading more!

Confused about the 'brother/sister' tags at the bottom of the page, though. Upcoming, perhaps?

Nice one realy good first story carn't wait til chapter 2. P.S don't listen to the nay sayers xx

I enjoyed reading this story & I can hardly wait to read the next chapter. Please post it soon.

brilliant hot horny story love it. from start to finish. i hope you are planning more parts of this awesome story.

great story, sad that it ended, but waiting for more

WOW!!!!!!!! you have got to finish this!!!!!!!!! i'm DYING to read more. you're AWESOME!!!!!! i wish i was in your family.