All Comments on 'A Promise to Jared Ch. 01'

Mmmmmmm. I have a fantasy Jared too. Trouble is, he is my brother in law. Dreams are free anyway. Was hot reading this and thinking "what if"

James

I found this awkwardly written and poorly crafted. Grammar was awful. Many, many misspelled words. Nothing about this story was believable,clever or erotic.

I recommend you get an editor. There are alot of problems with tense and other errors that slow you from reading. Aside from that, it would have made more sense to have him prep the guy for 10 in. If not, OUCH! Keep writing though.

I Don't care ... If there are a few, or many typos or 'improper English' flubs, the theme comes through clear and ... far better than many other more prolific writers here and on other similar erotic sites. That's life, and it's a learning process. How many of us "So-called Critics" have had the courage to post a few 'mistakes' for the world to read? I've tried and trashed them all knowing I couldn't create the 'theme' to my satisfation - I tend to ramble too much. This story stayed on point. I'll gladly offer my opinions and even a few random thoughts, mostly in Private directly to an author, but I won't intentionally degrade a person in public ... who "TRYS" ...

I found this to be poor written as well, needs editor. A little seduction would be nice

I wonder if the author met up with Jared and this fantasy he had came true..