All Comments on 'A Sister's Relationship Going Deep'

This story reads like it might have been written by a person in the fifth grade. The mechanics of grammar are horrible, the punctuation is either missing or inappropriate, and the thought process is wandering all over the place. There is no organization, no sequence of the story. I would encourage you to attempt this again. Take the same basic idea, (it's a good one) and get it organized, use good grammar and punctuation, and then have somebody edit it for you. I think you will have something worth reading if you do. Keep trying.

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Plainly written by a 12yo!

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The first paragraph hinted at things not being quite right, but this, in the second paragraph definitely threw up the warning signs: <i>"The lake was basically a dock with a table and a bench with water."</i>

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Everything about this submission is wrong, as already commented on by others. Please Lit, get rid of rubbish such as this pile-o-stink.

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Don't listen to them, so what if there were a few grammer mistakes. You still told a Hot story, great desciptions of how you went down on eachother. Please write more!!

I bet they played with there self while reading your story, because I did Please more

It was a good story, don't listen to people who likes to judge others. Keep up the good work!

OI MAN UR A DUMBSHIT HOW DARE YOU PICK ON THIS WRITER UR PROBBALY A MOTHERFUCKING DOG HUMPER A WOOF WOOF

THIS HAS TO BE ONE OF THE BEST IV EVER READ KEEP IT UP I WANT MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Godd this story is so damn sexy I would love to fuck my sister she's gorgeous I fingered myself over this and came everywhere , my mum came in and sed wat are you doin and bent down and licked my pussy I wawas like woo you go mother fucker and we grinder are pussys :)

Excellent. story. Covers all my fetishes except my love for women sneezing.