All Comments on 'A Twin Desire Ch. 06'

You're back and better than ever! Take your time. It's worth every minute of waiting to get more.

Loving this immensely. I hope this news really makes them a true loving couple with a family.

While I fully agree that all sweetness and no drama makes for a dull story to tell I do hope you don't intend to break them before reconciling over the baby, there was a story with similar plot twist and it only ent downward after the incident. You minimal approach to the coming of to friends was real nice touch and in turn only boosted her friendship with Vanessa & Jill, even the sharing joke came over nicely. The whole progress was amazing and now that their home dynamic is about to take another twisting path in the near future I'm absolutely on the edge of my seat to see just how much and what they (and obviously their father) come up with.

A solid 5*+++ for this one! Take care of yourself first and see you when you can and will!

Please keep this going. I really like this couple (and their parents. too!) Thanks for this series. 5*, what else?

This is a great series for lit incest and prose in general. You do a great job of composing real characters and showing the emotions they go through instead of just telling us things and it gets the reader involved in their thoughts, aspirations, and motives at a deep level. I loved the poster thing because they have to stand up for themselves against each other as no relationship between people is ever completely composed of uniform love and affection. The reality of everything setting in is great in this chapter. I do have a small problem with just problems being solved by the parents having money and I think a good deal of conflict could arise from the financial obligations between them. There will always be a line that two independent people feel is appropriate when it comes to receiving money from an outside source. I think either the parents could draw a line or possibly a loan or B&B could start making an effort to being more independent. I see the honeymoon and apartment as gifts which is good, but I see that any problem happening being resolved by rich parents as being too much.

Thanks Great Story Overall though!

- MisterSlate

Good point about money and independence. So far, the money from the parents have been gifts for making their new marriage more fun. These are college students on scholarship. As the story moves forward, money issues will arise and cause stress for them, just as Brian's class schedule is causing frustration for Barb's libido.

In chapter 3 (I think), we already saw that dad has made his boys work for what they get. The girls get things a bit easier. (As a dad of 4 girls and a boy, yeah, that's life.) These kids will face challenges that will test their relationship, over and over, just like all of us do. I don't even think I'm capable of writing a fairy tale let alone a fairy tale ending. Remember their candlelight dinner is on a "poor student budget".

Thanks for the feedback.

I've been giving the chapters of this story 5 stars, up to now. To me, this chapter was mostly wasted on tales of practical jokes, and Barb's growing potty-mouth. 3 stars, for this chapter - and that's only due to the last few paragraphs!

Brian is right: they CAN get through anything together. And this will show them that truth. They can have genetic counseling, the baby can be fine, and they can have their own flesh and blood child. It is not the end of the their world. And in one way, they will mature from this. Keep rising!

Honestly, 3 stars and the accompanying feedback are very helpful. I can't always fix things for a single person but I do listen. Where appropriate, I make changes.

The practical joke stories are for giving insight into a twenty year relationship filled with fun and laughter. Other stories have been told to give insight into their heartbreaks and sorrows. It's part of the character development. It may not work for everyone. At the same time, if one person says it, many others may be thinking it as well. More comments are welcome.

As for Barb's potty mouth, as explained in a previous chapter, Barb has felt repressed. She's now feeling her oats and is becoming the woman she wants to be. At some point, as with most things in life, she's gonna go too far and have it bite her sweet ass. She'll learn. Brian has already let her know he's not the most comfortable with it. She has to get it on her own.

Again, please, dear reader, give me feedback. Thank you in advance.

Most of his story was par for the course of how these past 5 have gone. The sexy bits were sexy, the romantic bits got me smiling. BUT THAT END, my jaw hit the floor man, huge twist. Knowing these two they'll fight about this probably but I think they can get through it pretty easily and come out pretty much as they were. Very good writing choice, as usual I can't wait to see how the next part goes. Also I agree with you on what you said about perfect seemingly relationships, it started to seem a bit strange to me too but I know they come out on top.

So far and today I have given 5 stars! It is well worth it. To the 3 star people, you have them spoiled with the quality,and this was just sort of a COAST CHAPTER. They just coasted along until that bomb shell at the end. Please don't ask us to wait too long? Your writing is so perfect with grammar, spelling,etc we fall into the trap of expecting perfection every time! Carry on, this is shaping up to be an all time classic on this site!

it seemed like a bridge to the next chapter in their lives. i gave it 5 stars. you write great sex scenes - this chapter could have used a little more of them, and i agree -less with the jokes. But you need some angst to make a great story. seems like you added some!!!

is gonna be hit sooner or later...huge part in the journey of our twin/sibling lovers is getting through that ...I'd hate to say this but it might break them...though only for a short while because I still trust your romantic bone to win this one...I mean, you started an epic twin sibling love story here...give some room for dramas but we must see a happy ending...like your many readers...I for one, religiously check the site for new chapters of my fave stories like this one...I'm glad that you added more chapters too...take Brian and Barbara anywhere but hope their baby when he or she ( or they?)(they're twins after all...) comes, would lead them back to where they first started...when they fell in love, that is ... five stars all the way...

That was a really great lead up. I can't wait to see how they get through this challenge together. I know you're going to make it great. I can't wait for your next chapter

I haven't enjoyed a story this much in a long time. So much that I read all six chapters in one long sitting. Thank You!

I received this in an email and wanted to share for those of you who are waiting patiently for the next chapter.

This message contains feedback for: MarriedHeat

I'm not as gifted a writer as you so I'll keep this short. Where is Part 7 of A twin desire. I've been checking almost ever day since Part 6 came out. I need to know what happened it was such a big cliff hanger.

My response

I'm happy you're enjoying the story. I don't know if you've read the comments on each chapter but I've mentioned that I have health issues. I have a lot of chapter 7 written but it's rough and I'm having a hard time finding a suitable storyline to finish it off. My health issues cause me to get very tired and I sleep a lot. The more I tax my brain, the worse things get. 

Thanks for reaching out. I simply have to ask for your continued patience knowing more is coming. 

Nick 

MarriedHeat 

Please send me a note when the next chapter is done.

Capewide@aol.com

When I was getting through all these chapters I found it quite boring, if a little cringey, near the later chapters. I wondered why I found it boring. Then I realized, with the exception of the internal conflicts Brian and Barb in chapter one and the one that popped up at the end of this chapter, there was no conflict.

Anything, that could have become a conflict was snuffed out as soon as it came up. The family completely accepted their relationship without putting a second thought into it. Their friends accepted it. Brian's view on pregnancy, did not affect his relationship with any body else, not even barb. Not when it was revealed that he had second thoughts on impregnating his sister, and not when it was revealed why he had second thoughts on impregnating his sister.

So I hope this problem is not going to be immediately resolved (especially not with him immediately accepting the pregnancy and/or the board allowing her to keep her position in the volleyball team and allowing her to keep the scholarship), or at least if it does, it would definitely cause some more problems (Their true relationship being discovered, or one or both of their social lives going down the drain) later down the line. What I'm trying to say is that a story with the immediate and complete resolution of all conflicts as soon as they pop is a boring story. Conflict is what makes a story interesting. I'm hoping to see some real conflict (even if it's not the pregnancy one) in the future.

I do have a suggestion that would be extremely juicy for you to write about after this one gets resolved. What if their father screws up trying to make it so they can be married and gets arrested for falsifying documents?

Lastly, I'd like to say your writing skills are superior to most others I've seen on this site. Thank you for putting so much effort into this great story. You mentioned getting sick before, in case you did't get better already, I hope you get better.

Love this story.

Your interaction and banter between the characters make me believe they are real and genuine.

Your humor is awesome.

I love that the twins are only involved with each other.

My only thoughts so far as to improvement would be their ages. When I read this I get an overwhelming feeling that they are older than their stated ages. They seem to make decisions and act as if they have much more life experience. Your characters are mature and the decisions they make show this. Because of this I think you would do well if you write this level of quality and make your characters older in future stories. With this story they are what they are and I am still going to read this till you end it.

Very impressed with this story!! Keep it quality and take as much time as you need to maintain it as such.

To sum it up: THANK YOU!!

any updates about chapter 7? I've still been checking frequently and I want it so bad

My health has been getting progressively worse. I'm not terminal. I have issues which cause a lot of fatigue. Doing anything requiring focus and concentration exhausts me. I can only focus on something for 30-45 minutes and then my brain and body shut down. Having kids and grandkids, I have to budget my time.

Thanks again to all who have been encouraging. I am seeing doctors but no solutions have been forthcoming. I am trying. I promise.

Great story, hope that your health improves, really looking forward to chapter 7.

To those who are looking forward to Chapter 7, I've been working on it. It deals with some very intense emotions so I'm taking my time to get it as right as possible.

Thank you all for being patient. My health has been a disaster.

While working on Chapter 7, I had another fit of inspiration and wrote another story. This one is a mother/son story. I'm getting it ready right now. And no, it doesn't deter me from this story. I write when a good story hits my brain. Watch for it and I'll look forward to your feedback.

I do hope you are able to find a solution to your health issues, they can be so frustrating. I am really enjoying your work and am in awe of your talent with imagination and the written word. Thank you so much for entertaining me.

I really like this story can't wait for more

This chapter was amazing!!!!! I cant believe theyre going to have a baby together. Heck Yes. Brian better just suck it up and learn to live with it. 5 Stars from me as usual.

Well so much for not having kids. I bet they will find out that the having babies will be fine. Another 5 star chapter. Well Done