by qhml1
Sorely missed and hope this is a teaser of more to come
The good:
You're back.
The not so much:
This is too short, too little meat on the bones for a good BBQ.
I'm hoping there ISN'T more to come of this and you get back to writing good stories again. This was not at all worthy of your talents.
But I'm not a big fan of flash stories. By the time I get introduced to the characters it's all over.
Man, when I saw that you posted a new story I broke out a grin. Welcome back to a great author. Looking forward to whatever you decide to post.
oshaw
Excellent work qhml1!
(even if flash stories ARE the premature ejaculations of the literary world...)
Great to see you back. It's been a wasteland here lately. They're going to change the category to "Wives and the cuck softcocks that love them"
A quick retrospective of a man and his cheating wife. It doesn't get any better.
I liked this story a lot. Other than the assault with the fork, I thought that this was a realistic story. I would suggest taking this type of story one step further. One interesting part of cheating is the betrayed's role int he cheating. Sure, you hear cheaters tell their spouses that it had nothing to do with them, but of course that is a lie. The cheater is not satisfied with marriage and has so little respect for the other person that they cheat. So what is it? The lack of respect? Then why? The lack of love? Then Why? Is the cheater just an arrogant person? Then why did the spouse marry them in the first place? The spouse bears the responsibility for allowing a security threat into their lives, if nothing else. How did that happen? Be honest.
Nice to have anothter story from you. Thanks.
Glad to see you are still a very skillful and entertain author. Thanks for sharing.
"The bitch is cheating on me, but I don't give a fuck anymore." – The problem is even IF you don’t “care” anymore, you still can’t let her just get away with it!
For those complaining about the length - It's a FLASH story; they are SHORT!
For those who don't like flash stories - We are told at the very beginning it's a flash story, if you don't like flash stories, why read it? Or if you DO read it, don't read it and then complain that it is a flash story.
Glad to see that you are back, I look forward to seeing more stories from you.
For all the authors out there that submit unfinished stories they term as "Flash" - take a look at this one.
Bill1104
I look forward to the quality of your stories on this site. Ignore the negative comments.
Nice to see that you are back. I look forward to reading quality stories again.
About the story? A good little exercise to shake the rust out! Slightly different style this Narative Descript but enjoyable. BTW Welcome back you were sorely missed!
Not sure why someone who has never submitted believes he can accuse you of being lazy.
Always a pleasure to read your material.
I agree that it is AWESOME to read ANYTHING new from you!
The NICE thing about a flash story exercise, is that it just whets our appitite for more.
I appreciate your "typical ending" theme. The point is even made about the neighbors; they don't think it would happen to them, but it eventually does. Long winded explanations, and details of counseling remain uneccessary. The very point of this story is that with cheating, sometimes you CAN see it coming from a mile away, and yes, you know exactly how it is going to end. So why drag it out? Seems a perfect fit for the flash story format.
Perhaps what I liked the most about this story is what others might NOT have liked. Once he realized that she was drifting away, and had lost respect for him and the marriage, HIS response WAS immediate (even if the confrontation took a while to play itself out). Once respect was lost, it was lost totally on BOTH sides of the equation. His apathy became his defining characteristic. But it was the same for the entire marriage. "You don't care, so why should I? You don't care, so I don't either! You don't respect me, I certainly don't respect you. You don't want to talk about it, then there really isn't anything to talk about, is there."
Now someone rightly might say that if he really loved her than he would have fought for her. Nah. Of course he fell out of love, because SHE fell out FIRST!
If you were to expand this story, it is this destructive apathy that would need to be explored further. The whys of her cheating no so much. But more about the pain of realizing that she had destroyed her marriage, because it was in effect, HER actions that changed him into sombody else. If there were tears, and begging for forgiveness, is there really true remorse? What loss is she feeling? The loss of his love and respect, or the the loss of that limited time in her life where she THOUGHT she could have her cake and eat it too?? The best consequence of his apathy is actually DESTROYING that notion for her. "Yeah, you might be getting fucked elsewhere, but if you were expecting to be coming home to safety , security, and love with me, than you thought WRONG!"
So many times I dislike stories where it seems Hubby WAITS too long to have a confrontation. Oh, he needs to gather evidence, or some such. The really annoying ones are when he has doubts. This guy MIGHT have waited for a confrontation, but he immediately knew what was wrong. His reaction was swift. His feelings DID turn off like the proverbial lightswitch. Oh, it might not have been the best way to handle it, but it does seem like it was better than many portrayed fictionally here in LW Land. He may have had to escape from a broken marriage, but at least he manages to escape without a totally broken heart, and at least his SELF-RESPECT remains intact. The argument could be made that if his heart wasn't broken, then it was because he never fully gave it to her in the first place, and maybe THAT is why she strayed. Maybe, but in this flash story at least, we don't know for sure. But it seems MUCH more likely, that she was never the type of woman who really ever deserved his total unconditional love, or never had fully earned that trust, and it is JUST as likely that they never should have married in at all. The cheating was an inevitable conclusion because she just wasn't the type of woman who could stay faithful. And realizing all of THAT, keeps this "typical ending" actually a fairly happy one!
Thanks Q! Glad you have been feeling better, and can't wait to read more!
Eagerly looking forward to more. This little tale was pretty damn good.
Usually I love this author's work. I only liked this one.
I know that it is only a story - but storing propane cylinders in the basement. Walmart won't even let you bring filled cylinders inside.
This elegantly crafted little piece is not exactly my taste BUT if the author of Boston to Birmingham and Terrible Taste in Teas intents to continue posting on this site I will eagerly read anything he chooses to write.
No Navy SEALs, no totally over the top revenge, just a realistic ending. Something like I hope I would have done in similar circumstances. Thanks for a nice little flash story. Oh, and welcome back !
I'll put as much effort into this comment as the author put into his story.
would put the effort of fucking off with his stupid comments, go find your sick writers and comment on them and their garbage.
It was too short. Not because it misses something but because it is a qhml1 story and we want more. ;-)
This isn't a story. But, it will be rated far higher than a lot of stories that a lot of authors put real work into because it appeases the lonely, pathetic old men and the hateful little Internet virgins who make up this section's core demographic these days. This whole category needs to be put out of its misery.
More like an outline for a story. There is no meat on this bone. Can't give it a grade. Only stories get grades.
process would be during that time and with those happenings. And the one that said violence ruined the story, I say that the violence was warranted and actually quite understated compared to what would happen with people I know. I never did live in a close neighborhood where we all partied with each other and so allow spouses to interact with each other in cozy settings. We did however party with work friends of mine and I never saw anyone get out of line with another's spouse, but then most of us were kind of "rough and ready" fellows and most didn't want to chance the hell that would rain down on them most assuredly.
Okay so what the whole story from both sides and why. What dumb wife goes into the basement to give head ,knowing someone will come down any time. Needed more detail.
Glad to see you back. Anxiously awaiting some new substantial offerings. Keep up the great work!
outline. Would have loved to read the actual story. Maybe next time.
Vanadorn, you pompous prick, this is how you write a flash story.
that makes some complain about this "flash" story. We are used to your full fledged, fleshed out characters and plot lines. Those are excellent.
That being said, I agree with others that it is a good thing that you are back with us and hope to see more from you in the near future.
I liked the story. All the elements are there and we only need to use our imagination to understand what has and will be happening.
Thanks for the story and welcom back.
Woodmanone
If he didn't like and respect the host he could have just opened the valve on the full propane cylinder stored in the basement, and allowed events to follow.
A flash, a loud boom, no messy bitter divorce.
No actual humans were harmed in the making of this comment.
George Foreman still has a jab better than most heavyweights' uppercuts! First minute of first round. K.O.
Welcome back!
This was a short story. Read Ohio's "Scenes From A Marriage" for a true flash story. This story was kind of interesting, but predictable, with typical actions, reactions, and feelings. A flash story has all the components of a detailed intriguing drama, but distills all the essence into fewer but powerful scenes and words. There was no power, drama, or real surprises here. Just a report of the final denouement for a marriage that we already knew was over, and with no emotional energy left.
So I enjoyed it; it was a good short story. Thanks.
The last few months of LW has been horrible. Unimaginative drivel. Did the LW All Stars get together and go on vacation? Thanks for this skinny meatless story. It's still better that 95% of the shit that has been posted.
* * * * *
if you left in oven longer it would have been delicious.
But it's fitting if you are back.
I was disappointed and surprised that he didn't jab the fork in the guy's ass. I was sure that was going to happen. BBQ rump roast.
Looking forward to stories with more meat.
I suppose I'd want to just be done with her , it. Life isn't suppose to happen thisway, is it?
Was this a prequel ? I always appreciate your stories.
Glad to see you have returned, you have written some of my favourite stories.
And what a great taste you've given us with this little gem. Thanks Q! More, more, more!
gave us an unremarkable story. It didn't really go anywhere or create much emotion. Q is a top tier writer, but this just isn't a top tier story.
I personally thought the fork in the hand was priceless.
Welcome back and thank you for sharing.
Brujay
Do you know what? I come here to read stories. I have a favored set of themes I like. Maybe they aren't everyone's cup,of tea, but I happen to like them. If I don't like a story, I (and you might start taking notes here) DON'T READ THEM!
And here is another thing: I also don't comment on them for the most part.
I certainly do not come to this site to be insulted. While you no doubt feel you are doing a 'lone voice in the wilderness' thing, I am not impressed. I am not edified. I am not convinced of the incorrect nature of my ways. And whether you do, indeed, have a point, all I am truly convinced of is that you are an asshole, who, by reports, is trying to dissuade anyone who writes a story you don't like from writing here.
So you are also a censorious asshole.
So thank you EVER so much for your 'truth', but we aren't in the market for it.
If you want to insult an author, I will accept that as the price of 'fame'.
Deciding to insult the readership from your (metaphorical) mother's basement? Go play in traffic or something.
Thank for doing what you do so well. Thanks for sharing!!!!!
Like the the trailer that is used to whet your interest and persuade you to spend money on the actual book or movie.
Now that qhml1 has caught your interest, you can log in to amazon or Barnes&Noble, plunk down $9.98 plus federal and state sales tax for all 1,998 pages of the full length book. I expect the full length novel to be a best seller.
Oh wow...
Huedogg posted a comment, and I could almost understand like 90 percent of what he said. Those English as a second language classes coming along well then dogg? You even used actual punctuation!
Once you get quotation marks figured out your stories might almost be readable!
A marriage strife story hub was the solution and the sexual minority or disorder readers and authors could make happy each other. The sexual mayority readers could read stories how the sexual majority husband (wife) treats a cheating wife (husband) problem. Such hub could attract more good authors to publish and more stories were written about the aftermath as well........many good story stop at the divorce........After divorce the ex husbands would have success in the love department!
What a relief it is to see you out there again. I don't care what anybody says; this was a five.
This category needs to be overhauled, especially get rid of all the sicko humiliating willing cuckold tales, and their followers. Wouldn't that improve this category by about 100%? Also take the likes of swingerjoe and the cunt bonnietaylor2 with you on the way out. Now there would be an improvement worthy of mention. Author, your kind of stories is what makes loving wives tolerable.
Good read. Another page on what happened to the forked guy and if they are dating or not. If Esther of them are at the bbq's and how the neighbors treated them. Thanks. 4*
flc tells those who complain about cuck stories "Don't read them if you don't like them, then you can't complain."
Then he reads this, knowing that the author doesn't do cheater acceptance stories, and what does he do?
He complains about it.
It appears some readers didn't see the first sentence. Nice quick read, thanks I needed that.
Congrats. Welcome back Q. I gave this a four but it is hard to rate a flash story. It's like eating one potato chip. I hope you are inspired to write more because your other stories are amazing. Cheers Steve
I would have loved it to be about 3 pages with a love interest for him and more pain for her but you're the writer and I respect your work.
Morgan DeWolfe
Yep, yadda yadda yadda style, effective and to the point. Good to see you back writing.
damned if I didn't like it better this time than before and I really, really liked it the first time. Great read and should be required reading for neighbors and friends who are just a little over the top with their interactions with each other. A spouse shouldn't have to come with a "Do Not Touch" tattoo already in place. And inappropriate is what I say it is, not some troll living in Mom's basement. My wife has her own definition of inappropriate and danged if it isn't the same one as mine. How it should be.
Gave it a 5. Should be two chapters time air it out some but still good.
And an excellent return! We are all looking forward to new stuff from Q...
I don't think you were really into it when you wrote this one ... a lil flat for me sry Scotty
The tone of your story was perfect for a man who didn't give a damn about his wife any more. Excellent read.
Welcome back. Looking forward to more wonderful stories.
As a always, thank you for sharing your stories with us.
Brujay
thanks for another great read. As always your talents exceeds what one would expect on a free site....glad your back...hope you finish "finding an editor" and would love any other new stories you have to share... THANK YOU AGAIN.....
a promo of coming attractions.
a teaser, letting us all know what we can expect in the future
I hope
I couldn't help myself. Still a good read and for those that don't like a man being a man I say you guys should just be happy with the man you have and you girls should too. Like I read in another story, can't remember who wrote it but they said that cheating was all fun and games until someone had to die. And that is a very distinct possibility in real life. Some men and women don't sit idly by while their spouse cheats on them. The edge is not that far away sometimes.
Good story, good read. Thanks for sharing.
I once read a story and I will do just that if the need arises. The slut got her clit CUT OFF and her lover GOT is dick and balls cut off. just a story and I'll remember it...
I have an Uncle that quit HS at 18, became a whore mongering ass with married women, returned to HS to graduate at age 21 after he had been run down 3 different times and shot with buckshot on 2 other occasions. Of course some of the offended husbands received jail sentences, not all, but I always wondered why he seemed to think it was worth it. He never did change his ways.