Absolution Ch. 03

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Time slows to a crawl as Jolen brings his javelin about, deadly blade brought back into play. He is drinking again. His vision is obscured. I will at least free him and her from this monster, he decides with a fatalistic sense of acceptance. He projects to Adianna once more, I love you, Adia. I am sorry.

The aged Sparra warrior lets loose a throw with his javelin, he has never thrown truer, with greater certainty or conviction. The weapon flies, keen as a blast from the Aether and slams into the reclined form of the exulting chieftain, the power of its flight causing the blade to emerge halfway from his back and send him tumbling backwards off the dais. He never has time to draw another breath as his death is instantaneous, face frozen in mortal shock that is his last emotion. All movement stops as every eye in the cavern turns to the corpse of Akmah, blood leaking from the corners of his mouth and spilling from his chest to pool on the stone floor. Khor recovers in a matter of moments, tearing his eyes from his grandfather's dead face. He leaps, wings outstretched and war-cry shredding the silence, spinning in mid-air, scimitar cutting a precise path towards Jolen's neck.

With no time to react, Jolen only closes his eyes, resigned in the knowledge that Adianna and Khor will be free of this tyrant. A sudden, mind-numbing surge of energy erupts from Adianna behind him. Fueled by adrenaline and desperation, she manages to send a single, erratic blast of power through the mental barriers that block her abilities. The attack blankets the room, incapacitating the minds with a brutal psionic flare. Khor stumbles, fumbling his weapon which lands at his feet, metal clashing against the stone. The Karsh clutch at their temples in pain and confusion.

Grasping at the momentary diversion, Adia reaches out for Jolen, taking his hand she drags him after her pelting down the nearest tunnel. Jolen pants, shaking his head to clear it from the mindthrust and hurrying to keep pace. The whoops and screeches echoing from the near darkness behind them warn that the Karsh too are recovering and in pursuit. Weaving her way with a sure certainty, Adia counts the tunnel openings under her breath, turning to take one. A breath of cool, night air sweeps over their faces, and they duck down into the shadows. Doing her best to stifle the heavy, ragged gasping for air, Adianna crouches low, dashing for the relative safety of the forest with Jolen closely following. As they reach the treeline, she straightens and together they disappear into the woods.

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AnonymousAnonymousover 12 years ago
Absolute nonsense with all this dialect

You do not seem to be aware that there are a lot of readers whose native language is not English. Using dialect is an uncaring way of you as an author towards all of these readers. Besides that I thought reading a romantic Non-human story not a bloody and cruel one. No stars here.

cantfightfatecantfightfateover 12 years ago
Interested in the story

but the dialect is distracting. I would have been happier with a description of the dialect and then having it written normally. Readers are capable of hearing a dialect even when it isn't written. Having it all spelled out for me makes it harder to read and stops me from getting into the story.

I would also like to hear more about Adia and Jolen's past... why he left her, why she didn't come after him, etc.

Thanks for writing.

MizTMizTover 12 years ago
Where to Next

Now that they have been reunited and her father has been taken out, what next? They still have both their children to try and get. And what of a new leader, will Khar be the new leader since he's the closest relative?

Just post the next chapter, and hurry w/it. hehe-he

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