tagCelebrities & Fan FictionAdventures of Hollywood Jim Ch. 70

Adventures of Hollywood Jim Ch. 70


The invitation was hand-delivered to me, and written in raised gold-leaf printing.

"Mr. Robert Welles requests your presence at a party commemorating his years in entertainment." I read out loud as Jeff Murphy idly read a magazine nearby.

"Welles...Welles...where do I know that name? Is this the guy that-"

"Yes, it's THAT Welles." Jeff Murphy said without looking up.

"The same guy who produced those old films?"

"That's the guy."

"I don't get it, why am I being invited?"

Jeff looked at me with exasperation in his face.

"Why do you always put yourself down? This is a big invite that even Chuck didn't get!"

"I know but..."

"But nothing! Go to the party!" he said "Do you know how many people get an invite to his place? Jesus, Jim I'll never figure you out!"

With that, Jeff walked out of my office, probably yelling all the way down the hall.

I could tell he was jealous, but he was probably right.

But what some would call insecurity, I'd call disbelief. I knew Mr. Welles from his books and his career in films was legendary, I'll say that. He produced several classic films, ran Hollywood Pictures for many years and was really seen as a classic Hollywood mogul. Even my director friend John McDonald, who never failed to scare the hell out of me at some point, was intimidated by him. But I still wondered why someone like me was being invited to a party at his place and not the higher-up at Artists Unlimited, people like my boss Chuck Tyler. And/or his second in command Jeff Murphy.

Only one way to find out.

Deep in Beverly Hills was a house called Woodland. It was Mr. Welles' pride and joy and would be the site of this party I'd been invited to.

The home wasn't garish or high-tech, it was old time Hollywood glamor, with large double doors, lush greenery outside and antiquities inside. But for what seemed like a huge event, the guest list seemed was either very small or I was an early arrival. I parked my Mercedes SLK convertible and was immediately drawn, not to the house but to another car that had arrived before me, a bright yellow Lamborghini.

"Mercy...mercy me!" I said to myself as I looked over its sleek lines that seemed other-worldly. In all the time I'd been in Hollywood I didn't ever recall seeing one of these on the roads, only in the pages of car magazines. I crouched down to look closely at the gleaming logo on the nose and I could see my reflection in it. I had to get a photo of this.

"Pretty nice wheels, huh?" I heard a female voice say, making me look up from adjusting the camera app on my phone.

"Very nice...I've never seen one of these." I said as I stood up.

"Yeah, I never had either...it was an impulse buy." she said "Still can't believe I own it."

"It does seem like some kind of dream mobile."

"Hi...Jenny McCarthy." she said as she extended an elegant hand.

The mystery woman was revealed to be Jenny McCarthy. She had the blondest hair I'd ever seen, it looked like it had been hand painted in gold. And she wore a beautifully simple and sexy red silk dress.

"I'm Jim." I somehow said.

"Jenny and Jim. Hey, that's got a nice rhyme to it."

"It's all in the 'J's I guess."

"Oh, yee-ah!" she replied with that wiseguy (or girl) tone of hers "So why are you here? Friend of Mr. Welles?"

"To be honest, I'm not sure. I've never met him."

"Same here. Let's go in and find out."

She impulsively took my hand and we went inside the elegant house where we were met by a well-dressed English butler who directed us to the pool out back.

"Holy shit!" Jenny said to me "The only other pool I've seen like this was at the Playboy mansion."

"You said it..." I replied.

At first glance it seemed a little ordinary, an egg-shaped pool. But the elegant fountains and the greenery that surrounded it were unlike any I'd ever seen. It was simple elegance personified.

"The guest list must've been pretty small." I said as I looked around.

"Yeah, where do you suppose we could get a drink?" she asked

"Over there looks promising."

I pointed to a small bar that actually had a few people around it.

"Ah, signs of life." she said

Jenny and I got glasses of wine and she began chatting with a couple who seemed to know her. But their conversation somehow bored me and my eyes drifted back to the house and then to a smaller building near the tennis courts. Several more people began arriving and Jenny recognized them too.

"I wonder if Mr. Welles would mind an explorer like me?" I thought to myself.

The party sounds drifted behind me as I cautiously began walking the grounds. The small building was unlocked and I quietly stepped inside. It turned out to be a screening room with aged leather chairs and framed posters for films Welles either directed or produced, all classics. I might have the nickname of "Hollywood Jim" but what I was staring at was real Hollywood history. Perhaps that accounted for the reverential silence I had as I looked at all the photos and posters on the walls. On a shelf, behind glass that was probably bulletproof, was a glittering gold statue.

"No way..." I mumbled as I looked closer.

It looked like an Academy Award.

Then I saw the inscription;

"Awarded to Robert Welles for best performance by a Cocksman in a leading role"

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Jenny making her way to the screening room door.

"Hey, I wondered where you went. I never got to talk to you, you just disappeared."

"Oh, just looking around...curiosity, you know." I said

"Yeah, this place is something...whoa is that an Oscar?" she said excitedly.

"A slightly twisted Oscar if you ask me."

Jenny looked closely at the inscription, then put her hand to her mouth and laughed.

"That is be-yond twisted!" she laughed.

"Demented, maybe?"

"Yes, that's it!" she laughed.

"I think he must have very interesting friends too."

"I found out Hef's one of them."


"Yeah, they had some fun times together at the mansion."

"Maybe he gave him that award."

"It would be the kind of joke he'd do."

"Um, if you don't mind my asking...uh..."

"What's Hef like?" Jenny replied, it seemed like she'd been asked that question many times before.

I sheepishly nodded.

"He's a good guy, he never forgets his friends."

"Sounds about right, I almost met him once."

"Almost met him? What happened?"

"It's a long story, but I helped out a friend of his and he thanked me over the phone" I referred to the time I helped out Bridget Marquandt of "Girls Next Door" fame when her car broke down in the midst of a rainstorm and word got back to Hef "He sorta gave me an invite to the mansion but I never knew if it was serious or not."

"Ah, I see...he probably meant it."

All the time we'd been talking, Jenny had been looking at me and idly twirling a lock of her hair.

"What do you do, anyway?" she finally asked "I've been talking to you all this time and never asked."

"Oh, I work for Artists Unlimited." I said as I fished out a business card and gave it to her.

"Special Photographic Projects Director, huh?" she read.

"A fancy way of saying staff photographer."

We both laughed at that one.

"I like that." she said

Just then her phone buzzed, she quickly took a few steps outside to answer it. She looked at me and flashed that electric smile of hers at me.

"Hey, I've gotta take off." she said "I promised my son I'd take him to Disneyland tomorrow so I need to make it an early night."

"That's cool, I've never been there."

"Oh, you should go. At least once to say you've been there."

"I'll add it to my bucket list, then."

"Well it was good to meet you Jim...I'm gonna hold onto this." she said as she held my business card "you know, in case I need my picture taken."

"I'll be glad to do it."

"You'll be glad you did, bye babe." she said as she quickly walked back up the great lawn.

I felt it was time I left too, I never did meet this mysterious "Mr. Welles". Maybe I can bluff my way out of any questions I get about this evening. At least I met someone with perhaps as many stories as Mr. Welles.

Two weeks later, I was flying to New York, accompanying Tigress to an appearance on "The View" in conjunction with announcing their world tour which would start at the Barclays Center in Brooklyn. Usually it wasn't necessary for me to go, but they liked having me along, they always got good photos, so a day or two away from the office was nice.

That morning I rode with "the girls" to ABC's New York studio and we were ushered down a long hallway and past what seemed to be offices for each of the hosts. Whoopi Goldberg immediately came out of the makeup room and was eagerly chatting up the girls, so photos were a must here.

"Get a shot, 'Hollywood'!" one of them giggled.

"Hollywood? What kind of name is THAT?" Whoopi asked quizzically.

"Don't ask!" another laughed

All I could do was shrug my shoulders and click the camera. Sherri Shepard soon appeared which led to another round of laughs and "why do they call him "Hollywood?" jokes.

An announcement that echoed through the hall was soon heard by all;

"5 minutes to air everyone! 5 minutes to air!"

Everybody scattered to their "positions" as it were. I checked my gear and looked for the green room, just as I turned a corner I collided with 3 other people, one of whom suddenly recognized me.

"Hey! What are you doing here?" one of them happily asked.

It was Jenny.

"My job, I said I was with Artists Unlimited."

"Oh, cool! It's good to see you again."

Her assistant cleared her throat as if to imply something important.

"I think we're running late, Jenny." she said diplomatically.

"Right, will you be able to stick around?" Jenny said as we began walking.

"Yeah, I'm here with Tigress."

"Great! See you later, then." she said as she headed for the stage entrance.

The stage doors closed, a red light began blinking and the audience was heard as the ladies of The View came out. Candy and Mandy from Tigress were guest co-hosts today so my photo taking would be fairly limited. An assistant showed me to an area where press people or special guests were usually seated and, lucky me, I was by the show's producer who was often the brunt of jokes from the show's cast. But I was also close to Jenny who gave me several happy glances during the show until Sherri finally noticed.

"Girl, who are you looking at?" she asked while they were still on the air.

"Oh, the guy over there, he's with Candy and Sandy." she replied as she pointed me out.

"We know him very well!" Candy said laughing "He takes all our photos."

"Stand up, then!" Sherri said

The cameras had found me and I had no choice but to acknowledge them.

"That's Jim, he always makes us look good." Sandy said, knowing how shy I could sometimes be. So I humored them and gave an elegant wave to the camera and the audience who got a good laugh.

"I wonder if Mom's watching at home?" I said clear enough to be heard.

This made everyone laugh heartily.

The rest of the show went smoothly enough and I was set to head back home, but the girls wanted me to get some more shots backstage.

"Why not?" I said

Candy and Sandy posed with crew members backstage. Then the show's hosts wanted extra shots too.

"You never told me why he's called "Hollywood"." Sherri said to them.

"I can guess why." Jenny replied

"Oh, yeah?"

"'Cause he's a star, that's why, he works with them so he must be one." she said with a big smile and wink towards me.

She did have a point there.

"You would say that!" Sherri laughed

Once our photos were done, everybody began to leave but Jenny stayed behind.

"Hey, could I see that last shot you took?" she asked

"Sure...I wouldn't worry though, you always look great."

"Oh, yeah? Even with glasses on?" Jenny said as she looked at the shots I'd taken throughout the show.

"Uh...yes, of course."

Jenny gave me that smile of hers again.

"Good answer. How long will you be in town, anyway?"

"I was planning to fly out this afternoon..." I said, then realized the tone in her voice might be implying something else "...but that can be changed."

"Good...um, feel like going for coffee?"

"Only if I buy the first round."

Her eyes widened, as if surprised.

"Another good answer...and yes, you may."

Jenny soon reappeared in a stylish black wool coat that only highlighted her golden blonde hair even more. I'm sure if anyone saw her with the geeky guy in a New York Giants varsity jacket they'd think she had a stalker, but being in New York I fit right in as we got into a limo and drove away.

"So where are we going?" I asked

"Little place in the Village, they have awesome stuff there." she said in that giddy voice of hers.

She was right, it was a very anonymous place we arrived at that had its entire menu written in multicolored chalk on a giant blackboard. Jenny quickly ordered a strong blend for both of us.

"It's one of my few indulgences." she said as we split a huge blueberry muffin.

"I can see why these would be so tempting."

"So, Mister Hollywood..." she started as she looked down and slowly stirred her coffee before leaning in close to me, her chin resting on her hand and that sexy inquisitive look on her face "How did you got that name?"

I had to take a deep breath before answering, she knew how effective that "look" of hers was.

"W-well...kind of a long story..."

"I've got time." she quickly answered

"OK...back where I grew up..."

"Where was that?"


"OK, go on...I won't interrupt you."

"...I had a friend I used to hang out with all the time...and I was always into movies...so after awhile he started to call me..."

"Hollywood Jim...I see..."

"Y-yes, that's how I got the name."

We were both looking at each other in silence.

"I like that...good story."

"No matter how many times I've told that story I always get flustered telling it."


"I don't know...just seems weird that's all."

"I don't think it's weird."

"OK, that's good to know."

Just then, my phone buzzed with an incoming text message. It was from Jeff Murphy, one of my bosses at Artists Unlimited, he wanted to know how things went with Tigress.

"Important message?"

"No, uh, just work, They want to know how the appearance went, when I'll be back."

"When do you have to be back there?"

"I was planning to grab an afternoon flight."

"Do you have to?" Jenny asked with a slightly naughty look on her face.

"No...not necessarily."

"Then...maybe you'd like to see my loft?" she said while stirring her coffee.

"That might be nice...I've never seen a New York loft before."

"You can scratch something off your bucket list too." she said before looking up at me and winking.

"Let me do one last bit of business."

I quickly wrote a text to Jeff telling him the appearance went fine and I'd call him when I got home.

"Let's go see your humble abode." I said with a smile to Jenny.

"Well, alright!" she replied happily as she grabbed her coat.

A quick cab ride and we arrived at what looked like a rehabilitated factory building.

"This is it?" I said as we got out of the cab.

"Uh-huh, brand new development. Like it?"

"Yeah...kinda funky."

"You'll love the inside." Jenny said as we got on the elevator.

Jenny unlocked the door and gently grasped my hand as she led me inside while looking over her shoulder at me. Then she pulled me in close to kiss her. Jenny's lips felt very sweet for some reason.

"Hi." she said softly

"And hello to you, too." I replied as I kissed her again.

"I wanted to do that in the cab...but I was too nervous."

"I would be too."

Jenny's loft was a beautiful mix of cool furniture and her trademark goofiness. The only evidence of her Playboy days seemed to be a framed cover of the issue when she was named Playmate of the Year.

"So, what does Hollywood Jim think of the place?" she said as she slipped off her coat and tossed it over a sofa.

"It's you."

"Oh, yeah? What's your place like?"

"Kinda like this...is that Evan?" I said as I looked at a photo of her with her son.

"Yep, he's in school now...he'll be home later."

"Oh, uh, then I won't stay too long."

"No, no..." she said quickly "It's OK, he's got a friend nearby, he'll be OK."

Jenny and I kissed again, deeply this time.

"Besides...Mommy's horny." she said.

Jenny began to slowly rub her body against mine, giving me that "Jenny look" she always had in photos. The one that was goofy and sexy all at the same time. I could feel a hard-on building inside me and I wanted her in the worst way. Every Playmate image I remembered of her was rushing through my mind. And seeing the sexy lady she'd become was even more of a turn-on.

And it was right in front of me!

Go for it, "Hollywood"!

I reached for those beautiful tits of hers and she immediately breathed in sharply.

"Oh yeah, babe...everybody loves my boobs." she giggled

"Yes, but...you have gorgeous hair..." I said as I stroked her blonde locks.

"...and pretty eyes too." I said as I slowly removed her librarian glasses and kissed her softly on the cheek.

"Ooooo...you wanna go in my bedroom?" she whispered

"Or we could...do it here?" I said

Jenny's eyes lit up.

"Oh, kinky!" she giggled

My hands reached around to her ass and caressed it. Then they slipped under her skirt and felt it even more.

"You've got a nice ass."

Jenny's face showed how much she loved what I was I doing.

"I think you've got something nice too." she said as her hand cupped the crotch of my pants "Very nice."

Jenny caressed the crotch of my pants and my hardness grew more and more.

"Yeah...really nice..." she said in a softer voice.

This blonde beauty was giving me an experience I'd only dreamed of before.

I leaned in and kissed her again.

"That's nice." she said "Would you like to...take your clothes off?"

"I would..."

"I would too..." she said in the same soft voice.

Jenny stepped back a little and slowly pulled her black sweater up and off. As I unbuttoned my flannel shirt, I could see Jenny's satin bra. She casually removed it, exposing those beautiful tits of hers.

"W-wow..." I croaked out

Jenny giggled a little, she knew I liked what I saw. She was standing in front of me wearing only a cute pair of bikini panties, she could definitely see my hard-on through my underwear.

"Um, c-can I do that?" she asked

"Do what?"

She got close to me again and our bodies touched.

"Take your underwear off? I like doing that."

"Oh...y-you can do wh-whatever you want."

Jenny smiled back at me.

"You'll be fine, hon." she said softly "I like you."

Jenny's hands slowly slid down my shoulders and chest until they were on the waistband of my underwear. Thankfully, she didn't choose to simply yank them off, but slowly slide them down until my dick popped out, very straight and very hard. Jenny looked down and I could tell she was impressed.

"Oh...it's beautiful." she whispered as she kissed my cheek and her hand gently grasped it.

"S-so are you." I said

"Aw, Thank you." she said with a bashful look before it became a very sexy look "Let me make you feel good."

Jenny slowly knelt down and held my dick, lightly touching it with her tongue and then licking all around the shaft before getting to the head and swirling her tongue around that. I was breathing sharply and trying not to look down but I couldn't help myself. When I did, I only saw a mass of blonde hair and felt her lips and tongue as they enveloped my dick.

"Ohhhh...Jenny..." was all I could say.

Jenny casually tossed her hair back and looked up at me

"Like that, huh?"

I could only nod my head.

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