Against The Odds Pt. 01

"All in all we're very close."

"That's great."

"What about you, are you close to your family?"

"Not really, we never had a big falling out or anything, we just were never that close. We speak on the phone and stuff but that's about it."

They arrived at Rita's apartment, it was beautiful. Whilst Chris was happy with his, it was at best functional. This was wonderful, lots of art work and beautiful furnishings adorned the living area.

"Would you like a beer or something else?"

"A beer would be great."

Whilst Rita was gone Chris looked out the large windows, not much to see but the lights of Pasadena below. Rita returned with two beers, "There's a great view in the daytime."

Chris took his beer, "This is a really beautiful apartment."

"Thank you, and it's all mine, paid for and all. I've worked hard for it."

"I'm sure you have, cheers." He said, raising his bottle.

"Cheers!, So mister how's it feel being in the lair of a porno queen?"

"Very nice, no seriously can I tell you what I've been thinking?"

"Of course."

Chris paused, trying to get his thoughts in order. "I know it's important for you that we talk about this a bit and maybe we can't get anywhere till we do. I normally sort things out in my own head and keep them to myself, but I think I want to try and tell you what I think and feel."

Rita interrupted him, she leant in and gave him a gentle kiss on the lips "That's wonderful, tell me how you feel." A cheeky grin crossed her face as she said it. As far as Chris was concerned it was the sexiest grin he had ever seen, little dimples, that he hadn't noticed before, forming at the side of her mouth.

"Fuck, that is not helping me think clearly." They both laughed. Chris fought the urge to pull her to him.

"Before you rudely interrupted me I was trying to say that I think you are incredible, I look at you, I listen to you, I look at this place and I know how much hard work has gone into it all. You could have ended up a right fuckup but you didn't. You're a smart, strong, independent woman and I think it's brilliant. I don't look down on what you do and at the moment it doesn't bother me at all. I'm sure there will be times when it does bother me but I think if we are together then between us we could work it out."

Rita looked at him seriously, it was her turn to lighten the mood and make a joke of things, "Is that you trying to be charming again?" They both smiled before Rita gave him another kiss. "Thank you." She said, leading him to the sofa.

They both sat, Chris sensed that Rita was feeling as nervous as him; he took another sup of his beer before saying in the worst mock American accent Rita had ever heard "So babe, you wanna talk some more or you wanna go screw?"

"As you put it so nicely I think we should talk some more." She went and got them another beer, when she returned she asked him what first attracted him to her.

He looked her up and down, "What, apart from the obvious?" he said smirking.

"I bet you get to rub oil into good looking woman all day."

"It's one of life's hardships, but I've learnt to cope."

"No seriously. I knew I liked you and I sensed you liked me, but what was it? I'm use to men trying it on with me, thinking I'd be an easy lay but there was something different in you."

"I liked your ballsiness; like this is me, deal with it. I know some of it is an act but I still liked it. I think I also saw vulnerability, you were hurting and there was a bit of me that just wanted to pick you up and hold you." Chris started to ramble on about knowing she was strong and didn't need protecting but Rita stopped him.

"Don't over analyze it, I get it. You're a big strong man who wants to look after the weak woman." She chided him.

"It's not that, it's..."

"Shhs, I'm joking, for someone who's normally quiet, you don't know when to shut up." They both laughed, Chris clinked his bottle off of hers. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For having the same sense of humour as me and for telling me to shut up."

She leant in and kissed him again, Chris pulled slightly away, leaving Rita with an uncertain look on her face. "Your turn now. So porno queen what was it that attracted you to the handsome hunk of a man."

"Well he was so dishy, and then he told me to take off my blouse, I tell you, I was in slutty heaven." This was all said in a ditzy, silly voice. Chris laughed out loud and Rita joined in.

"Seriously, you exuded a calmness that I've never felt before. I felt safe and wanted. Then you made me laugh and a bit of my heart melted."

Chris kissed her, they kissed and kissed, nothing rushed, gentle kisses, discovering each other's lips and mouth. Chris felt light headed, aroused and loved all at the same time.

"Do you want to sleep with me, you don't have to and I'd understand fully if.." Chris put a finger to her lip. "Now it's your turn to shut up, I'd love to sleep with you."

When Chris awoke he was aware of Rita fixing her hair in front of the mirror.

"Morning my sleepy headed man."

"Good morning, what time is it?"

"Six thirty, I have a shoot out of town today, so need to get a move on."

She must have seen the look on his face, was it hurt? Anger? Disgust? She came over to the bed and sat down, her head slightly tilted, nervous. "This is what I do, my job. You're going to have to get use to it. We can talk about it, but you need to get your head around it."

"I saw one of your movies."

Rita was a bit surprised "What one?"

"I don't know, it was on one of those free site where you get a few minutes of each one."

"What was my name in it?" She saw the puzzled look on his face "I have a couple of different professional names." Chris nodded and told her.

"What did you think of it?"

"It was horrible, nothing sexy or nice about it at all. It was just some asshole fucking you, hitting you, choking you." Chris was surprised by the passion and anger in his voice, he didn't know whether he wanted to shout or cry.

"I know it looks horrible but it's just acting."

"That asshole seemed to be enjoying it way too much to just be acting."

"Maybe." Rita had worked with some actors and directors who got off on hurting women.

Somehow she managed a lighter voice, "You don't have to worry today, today I'm just doing girl on girl stuff, mother and step daughter I think." She paused "We'll just spend the day licking each other's asses and cunts."

Against his will a grin crept across Chris's face "You have such a nice way with words."

Rita lightly kissed him "See you later, let yourself out when you're ready to go."

Chris was all over the place at work, one minute he was as high as a kite the next he felt in despair. The poor clients probably got the worse treatments he had ever done. Mel asked him if he wanted to talk about it but he said he'd sort himself out. He had the afternoon off but instead of going to the gym as he planned he went home and laid on his bed, thinking.

The previous evening and night had been the best of his life. The meal and the talking had been wonderful, if not a little strange. When they had gone to bed they hadn't even had sex. They had lain there with the moonlight coming through the window, caressing and studying each other's bodies, whispering to each other. It was the most intimate, wonderful thing he had ever done. Then this morning when he realized she was going to make a movie that day, he had felt like his head and heart were about to explode.

He laid there arguing with himself. He knew what Rita did was only acting and she was good at it, but more importantly he knew the way she was with him wasn't acting. Slowly he found space in his head for both these things and as he done many times he felt himself calm.

Around four Rita phoned, "Hey babe how's your day going?"

"It's going good, how's your day been?"

"Great, we just finished filming, I'm heading back into town now."

"How was the licking?"

"What? Oh that. it was really good, I was so full up I could hardly each my lunch."

Chris just stood, smiling to himself.

"I was just wondering, what you doing later?" Rita asked

"I'm working till just after nine, but after that nothing."

"Would you like to come over after you finish?"

Chris hesitated, "Yes I would, very much."

"Great, I'll see you then."

When Rita opened the door she was wearing a toweling dressing gown and a towel around he head, having just came out the shower. Chris smiled.

"What you smiling at?"

"I was smiling to myself because even dressed like that I think you're breathtakingly beautiful."

"Man I don't know what it is but whatever it is, you've got it bad." They both laughed.

"I'll just go and get changed into something more comfortable."

Rita returned wearing loose, shapeless pajamas "Still breathtaking."

"Piss off." Said Rita "How was your day?"

"It was ok."

"How were you after our little talk this morning? Sorry if I was a bit brutal, I just get very defensive and then go on the attack."

"I understand, I think. I was a bit discombobulated this morning, but I'm getting there now."

"What does discombobulated mean, I can hardly say the word."

Chris laughed "It was a word my mum used a lot when I was a kid, it means you're all over the shop, don't know if you're coming or going, that sort of thing. God, I haven't used that word in years, I wonder why I used it now."

"Probably because you're still discombobulated or however you say it."

"Maybe."

"It's a very hard thing to get your head around. I don't know anyone in the industry that isn't going out with either someone else in the industry or a douche bag who sees them as a trophy and doesn't give a damn about them. I don't know if it's even possible for someone normal to love and care for someone who does what I do for living. That's why I never date."

"I'm trying to get my head around it, I really am. And I think I'm getting there, there's just some things I don't understand. I didn't want tonight to be all heavy, I wanted us to be all lovey dovey, but now we're talking about it is it ok if I ask you about the things that are bothering me."

"Yes."

Chris thought about the things he thought he could handle and the things he knew he couldn't, he thought about how much he'd already fallen for Rita, more than anyone else ever in his life, he started.

"I know we've only known each other a very short time but If it's possible I think I'm in love with you. You fill my every waking thought, I feel a connection with you I've never felt before. If I didn't none of this would matter. I know you're an actress and a good one at that, I know you have sex with other actors so people at home can wank off, I get all that. But in my head I keep seeing a picture of you being choked into near unconsciousness. I just don't get it, how do you do it, why do you do it."

Chris had been so intent on getting all that was in his head out that he hadn't noticed Rita was crying.

His heart melted and he was angry with himself for being such a tosser, only thinking about what mattered to him. He held her tight, their bodies rocking in time with each other and the tears flowed.

When Rita stopped crying Chris asked if she'd like some water,

"No I'm fine thanks."

"I'm so sorry, I was being such a selfish prick I.."

"Stop talking!" Chris stopped. They were silent, Chris not knowing what to do, waiting for Rita to say something.

"My head is spinning, I can't think straight." Rita laughed, not because anything was funny but because it was just the way her body reacted. "You know nobody has ever told me they love me, lots of people have wanted to fuck me but nobody loved me, not since I was a child anyway. And you know what? I wouldn't have let them love me even if they wanted too. But I want you to love me because I think I love you. That bit is simple believe it or not, the rest is more complicated."

Chris kissed her and went to speak, but Rita stopped him, "Let me finish."

"About being abused and choked. The simple answer would be that it's the best paid work, it's only acting after all and I'm coming towards the end of my career so I want to make as much money as possible. I've told myself that for a long time." Rita paused, Chris just waited for her to continue.

"I've always said this was just a job and that I was a good actress. Sometimes I would argue that life and society was just too vanilla and that I was doing everyone a favor by pushing the boundaries, sometimes I would say that I loved sex so much that I just couldn't help myself. But it was all bullshit. Most of the time I just felt sad and worthless, a sense of self loathing growing all the time.

The first time I signed up to do an extreme fuck movie I was nervous. This guy had his dick in my mouth and kept slapping my face hard, I mean real hard. I nearly passed out and had bruising on my face for about a week. I hated it but there was a bit of my brain saying 'it's what you deserve.' That bit won out and I went back for more."

Chris was angry, not at Rita but at the whole fucking world, he was also heartbroken, overcome and unable to help himself, his eyes welled with tears. They were now both crying, trying to stop and laughing at the absurdity of it all.

"Hey mister soldier man, you're meant to be tough."

"I know." They laughed, cried, kissed and just held each other.

"We're so fucked up it's not funny." Rita said.

"I know. I will never ever let anyone abuse or hurt you again." Chris said.

"I know." Rita tried to smile but Chris knew she was worried.

....................................................................................................

"Listen bitch, get you're your thick spic ass here next week or else."

Rita held the phone away from her ear, away from the shouting, an anxious look on her face. Chris could hear it all clearly and signaled for Rita to give him the phone.

"To whom am I speaking?"

"Who the fuck are you?"

"I'm Miss Acosta's representative."

"Suck my dick you limey cocksucker."

"Is that before I cut it off and stick it up your ass, or after."

"Fuck you!" The line went dead.

Chris wanted to laugh but could see that Rita was worried, he smiled, hoping to reassure her.

"That went well."

"They are scary men, tied up with all sorts of people."

"I'm a scary man."

Rita didn't look convinced, "you're tough but you're not the frigging equalizer." They both smiled and Chris pulled her in close.

"Where did that accent come from, you started off talking like a lord or something and ended up like Jason Statham." They both laughed, tension easing out of them.

"I don't know, it just came out all posh when I started."

"I know they are dodgy characters and you're worried about upsetting them, but I promise you we'll get it sorted and nothing will happen to you."

Chris didn't know what he was going to do, but there was no way Rita was going to make that movie.

The previous evening.

They were both drained but had things on their minds that had to come out.

"It can take me time to get things straight in my head and you might have to bear with me but what I know for certain is that I don't judge or look down on what you do. I was laying in bed thinking about you." Chris stopped at this point, unable to stop a stupid grin creeping across his face, Rita just smirked.

"And I actually think that what I did as a soldier and what you do as a porn actress are not that different."

Rita looked at him, thinking this is rubbish but just said, "How so?"

"Well I was in special forces and much of what I did was extreme and if the truth be known, quite unpalatable for many people. Yes I got paid and yes it was for my country but really I did it because I could, because something inside of me drove me that way. When I hear you talk about doing porn and how you feel about it then I see similarities."

Rita could see some logic in it but wasn't convinced, "But you are a hero, a decorated soldier."

"Other people think of me as a hero, I think of me as someone who was just doing the job they were trained to do."

"I thought you didn't analyze things too deeply."

Chris smiled "You see what you've driven me too."

They talked about all sorts but kept coming back to how Chris felt about Rita doing porn, which at this stage she wasn't prepared to stop.

"I think this is a bigger issue for you than it is for me, I've already said that with your help I can get my head round it, I know it's a weird bloody situation but it is what it is, I want you, I want to be part of you. I can understand how you ended up doing the really violent stuff but it breaks my heart to think of anyone doing it and I want to hurt the men doing it and filming it. I can't tell you what to do but it would kill me if you filmed another one of those abuse movies."

Chris was near to tears again, he had been in some incredibly stressful situations in his life, firefights, hostage rescues, the lot, but this was the most emotionally drained he had ever felt. Rita held him, comforted him, feeling his distress. Distress caused by his love for her.

"I don't want to do that film, I won't do that film." She whispered into his ear, all the time thinking about how to get out of her contract.

The next day

"They aren't just dodgy, they're dangerous. Not the asshole you were just speaking to but the money behind it. These films have done well and they won't want to lose me. My contract is for one more movie, maybe I should just do it."

"No fucking way!"

Rita was shocked by Chris's shouting, "This is what I do, I can do it and we can get on with our lives and forget about them."

"I won't let you do it, you don't want to and I don't want you to, and can you imagine how fucked up it will be, these cunts enjoy hurting women and they'll hurt you bad knowing it's your last one."

Rita didn't like being told what she could do but she knew Chris was right.

"Well, how we getting out of it?"

"Do you think they'll take you to court for breach of contract?"

Rita laughed, "These guys don't need courts, they just scare you and hurt you till you do what they want."

Chris wanted to ask why she'd gotten mixed up with these guys, when she could get plenty of mainstream porno work. Rita had explained some of it and it hurt her to do so, he didn't want to make it worse.

"Do you remember me mentioning my friend Jon and his wife Belinda who I stayed with when I first moved out here, me and Jon are best mates and served together for years."

"He's the foul mouthed one you were telling me about."

Chris smiled and nodded.

"Well Jon works for Belinda's brother doing high level personal protection for some real dodgy fuckers, powerful but not always nice people."

"And?"

"If it's ok with you I think we should meet up with them, explain the situation and see if they have any ideas."

Rita was silent, thinking, finally smiling, "Well I suppose if he's your best friend it's only right that he should meet your future wife."

Chris was gob smacked, thinking two can play at this, "I do."

"Do what?"

"Agree to marry you."

"You think I just asked you to marry me?"

"You definitely did, and I accept."

They both got into a fit of giggles, all the tensions and worries disappearing, if only for a short while.

Still laughing but trying to gather himself Chris said, "This is so fucked up, I've only known you a short while but I love you with every inch of me." Dropping to one knee, "Rita Acosta, will you marry me?"

She thought he was still messing but could then see by his face that he wasn't, "Oh my god, oh shit, you're not messing are you?" Chris shook his head, Rita looked at him, her eyes welling up and her mouth dry. "Oh my, yes, Yes, YES!"

Chris stood up and pulled Rita close, wanting to scream, shout and laugh all at the same time. They kissed and just held their faces close, noses touching, cheeks rubbing, light, loving kisses.