All Comments on 'Allison's Descent into Slavery Pt. 02'

This "Slave Grading" story as bad as i expected it be. A loose rambling collection of meaningless buzz words taken from 50 other terrible "slave grading" stories on Literotica. While not the worst story I could not read entirely (sorry, but it was that bad) it is amongst the bottom 50 I have read on Literotica.

Another great chapter!

Just loved the side discussions by all of the different characters. Using Dr. Nikki Sheldon as an authority in the 60 minutes interview by Leslie Stahl was entertaining. It looks like you did a good job capturing the Nikki character.. Just wonder if Carl Bradford agrees and what Joe Doe thinks about your depiction of the Big D. How many of these characters will we see in the following chapters? There are so many possibilities. Which ones leave as free women and which leave in a cage wearing a collar?

So her mother-in-law is screwing her over and selling her.

Rut roh, Shaggy.

I don't think the MIL sold her, as they described her as being repo'd.

It is possible that the MIL's profligate spending habits have ensnared her DIL.

Great Story

I do not think the mother in law sold her either if she was repo’d. It looks like there were other options available to the mother in law. What did the power of attorney cover? I believe it authorized Allison’s sale but the author could have done a better job explaining that in the first chapter. Other that that issue I really enjoyed this chapter.

JUICING!

There I know and understand about the power of attorney that is standard procedural, but her stepmom gave Allison her word that she would protect her and have her back, not screw her over and sell her. She only went to get graded because it was required for her loan, that the only reason she was going to get graded, to begin with. It sounds like her fears and what she was afraid of would happen to her in going there.

I hope there is more buttsex in future installments

The next instalment is pending review and should be posted sometime this week. I will not address whether or not there is a betrayal at this point in the story. The power of attorney in this story authorizes the Amelia to sell Allison. Amelia also has the power to accept the bid in the Any Chance Auction. Whether or not Amelia exercises one of these options will be addressed in the next chapter.

The "Juicing" idea was something I came up with after finishing the chapter and went back and added into the story. I confess, I had fun writing that part.

Regarding the request for "buttsex" there will eventually be some anal sex but not in the next chapter.

I want to thank everyone for taking the time to leave a comment. All comments, even the negative, are appreciated.

"You have been repo'd, your Any Chance auction has been revoked"

Really? I'm S.H.O.C.K.E.D!

I kid, lol. Interested in seeing what happens next. Is the alleged "future mother-in-law" up to something? I suspect so...

Loved the “Midas Touch”! Hopefully we see more of Pixie Girl as the story moves forward. Really enjoyed the description of Pixie Girl masturbating her former babysitter to climax while the babysitter was strung up on display in the slave market.

You have a great story concept. I like it and the imaginative details in the slave trading universe. This much is compelling. Your story telling is quite another thing, however. You need to write simpler sentences with one concept. Break up the layers of subordinate clauses. When a sentence is as long as a paragraph, you become far less clear. Your story loses impact and energy. How many times did you start over telling this story? The last third of the story is rehash. Unnecessary. I bet the last third was your first version. Your protagonist asked questions. You have to answer them somewhere. The news of betrayal hardly rocked the boat in a sea of rehash. Isn’t betrayal terrifying? Do you understand how women respond to betrayal? The reader needs to feel this. Also, your protagonist has a dripping pussy for four torturously long pages! The most reaction any story character has is to take a sample taste. The supporting characters are supposed to enact possible reactions of the readers. This portends an underwhelming reader response. Good story telling will have readers seeking relief after half a page! Writing is not easy, I well understand this point. So peace! Live and learn. But don’t stop! I like the concept so I will keep reading in hope for better storytelling.