All Comments on 'American Dream'

Ms Tzang,

There is no question, you are definitely number one when it comes to story, character, emotion and writing. This is another example of the quality you exhibit.

Cheers, Terry

Even better than I expected and now I guess I better get to wiping up the coffee that I spit all over the ceiling.

Always look forward when I see you’ve posted; almost always a crazy, fun sexually charged escapade. Compensated dating — perfect and timely. Apparently originated in Japan, but who cares. You made it fun. Entire piece streaming/rambling fun with April and her acquaintances, including “poor” Gavin — you could not resist now could you. That scene was perfect Chloe Tzang; so much commentary across the spectrum mixed with outrageous sex. Nice combination. Piece did not feel long as we enjoy her unraveling American Dream.

As my favourite lit author I just have 5* .... now I'll go back to page one and start reading. Yeh, I got that much confidence 😉 This one looks epic Chloe, 70k words...

The story is fantastic, but your sense of humor is what elevates your work to the very top of the site :D. Thank you for each word shared.

Hot hot hot, but no novel will ever beat "Fingerprints on my heart" as April Fool's Day story!

This is some funny stuff. Chloe does have that kind of affect on men. Thanks for the 15 seconds of fame, as well as that long weekend in Paris!

Waiting and waiting for more Jeong but I can sort of forgive you for doing this first because it has a cherry popping scene in it which is what you do best, but you did say Jeong was next and then did Hanging Seven and now this were done first. About time we got more of My Asian Sister too!

superb writing !

Chloe is my favorite erotic author by far, enjoy !

Kinda hard to read when the author is taking political tangents and making rants about social issues every other paragraph lol.

Ahhh, but after I threw Gavin in as a character, I had to include a little in the way of going off on political tangents and ranting about social issues - it fitted in and a girl has to have some fun with her writing. I mean, Gavin and the money all over the floor was too good to resist, and the reporters.....rotflmao when I wrote that. Anyhow, Jeong is next....no politics there, or in my next few stories.

It wouldn't be chloe if there wasn't a political implication.... it absolutely adds to the story, otherwise it'd just be wall to wall sex scene.

The thing that gets me is the way that chloe writes that space between "I'm oblivious and sexy" and "I'm sexy and you know it" drrrn drrntit drrrn drrntit...

Great story! Glad you were able to finish it. It took me several days to read it since I'm a slow reader.

5

So you purposefully drop a very long story at the last minute. Only your most devoted fans will read it and vote 5* resulting in another blue W. Neat trick.

One learns, one learns. It is, isn't it but it's not something I generally aim to do. It's more my approach to writing up to the last minute, the categories I do stories in, and I almost ALWAYS write loooooong stories. The last minute drop was typical for me tho. I generally never finish early and almost every story I've dropped in these contests has been a few minutes before the deadline, because I'm so bad at hitting deadlines, as readers of Jeong know all to well. And all of that said, if it's a crappy story, it won't score high regardless. The best you can do is write a good story that readers like and cross your fingers. I have a gazillion entries that never placed at all and one that's never cracked 4.5..... And category IS important. A story in Loving Wives or Incest has about a 99.99% chance of never placing unless you're Lovecraft or silkstockinglover. IR isn't that popular overall but it can work if its my style of IR Asian romance. Sci-Fi disappears from view in a couple of days and very low # of readers. Romance and FirstTime are good categories but not really something I write that well. NonCon is okay, depending on the story, but your best chances are in a category with lower #'s of stories posted, so that it stays in view for longer. There ARE ways to improve the odds, but I actually never worry about them, it's just the way my writing goes....it was nice to win the contest tho.

Congrat's ChloeTzang on a well deserved win. I too put in a last minute story, but I was hurried so I got what I deserved from it, lol. It does make me wonder how fair the contest is, when it is acknowledged by the vast majority, that certain topics can not win. They really should change the scoring. Established writers have a gigantic advantage. If they have a fan base, some will even one bomb other stories without reading them. To tell you the truth, there isn't a single story on Lit. that makes it past the gate keepers, that isn't worthy of a 2 maybe even a 3.

I gave this one a 5. It was well written, it hit the theme, and it stood alone. Not all of the stories hit that criteria, in my opinion.

Love your stories Chloe and feel they have a good grounding in the Chinese expatriate experience as my wife is Chinese and my daughter's live a multicultural life in Auckland.

Just a little amazed that a Chinese family weren't following the American Dream and recognising Fox News as more fake than CNN. But I'm a Kiwi so what would I know?

I agree with the other anon, that this story won because of the late entry and high word count. But hey, you do what it takes to win. Late entry with high word count isn't CHEATING, it's called hedging your bets. (I hope) no one here needs the $150 to survive in life, so it's more about getting recognition and fans. This story will do that because it won. If the story really sucked, then it would get 5* and it wouldn't win. The story doesn't suck, (although, to be fair, the characters are gossamer thin and lack any deep emotions). The sex is hot enough, and the story's entertaining. So hey. Good win, no sarcasm. (If I had to add one gripe though, this story needed more accurate tags. Lesbian sex was present in the story, but not the tags because two spots were hogged by "ChloeTzang" That's hella dumb) haha

Thanks for the comments and feedback everyone :) - and the last minute entry was more inadvertent force of circumstances than intentional. I just didn't finish writing it and I was editing and formatting like crazy the last evening or it would've been in earlier. Jeong readers know how appallingly bad I am with deadlines (sorry guys - you ARE next). As for the prize money - going to the Ukraine Defense Forces - probably hearing protection for artillery gun crews. I'll have to take a look and see what's needed this month.

Thanks for another CrackerJack of a story, Chloe Tzang. I was intimidated by a 19 pager at first and held back till I had a weekend free to dive into it, but I'll guess that the entire CZ fan club pitched in and fired the 5* button long before they got to page 19, or even wended their way into the socio-cultural commentary intermixed between immigration transition and compensated dating. Congratulations on another success. First Timing is always a winning category.

A tour de force of sarcastic wit and pithy criticism of teen social media indulgence, society's lack of morals and integrity. Really well done, humorous, timely, current and the sex scenes, esp at the beginning, were hot af. Oh how great it would be to meet and indulge in a girl like April. You are a very good write, will have to check out some of your stuff.

What's the Bolivian necktie reference?

Hi Chloe,

Perfectly crafted story as always. I loved that you included "Social studies" which is one of the all time great stories on this site. I mentioned it in a comment on another of your stories a few years ago, and you responded positively.

Love your work,

Jeff

Fun story, engaging enough to read through, and enjoy, despite its length. Nothing against long stories, but this appeared to be long because of so much redundancy and repetitiveness throughout; I believe it would have been a stronger story if it were more tightly edited. And I also want to know what a Bolivian necktie is; I looked it up, thinking it was some sort of cum/semen reference, but it seems to be a form of murder/execution that is quite disturbing.

A rollicking good sex story w7th gehuine ROFLMAO moments (yes, I know, technically there should be a "T" in that acronym, but I lijk to read it as a word, as in "Roffelmao" which to my mind seems to capture the meaning in sound somewhat, whereas 'Rotfulmao" just sounds like commentary on the late Chairman Mao, may he rot in hell). Your first place award is absolutely well desrved! No April Fools joke that!

Re Bolivian Necktie, I was actually thinking of what's referred to as a Columbian Necktie - the Bolivian seems to be a variation on this, but essentially, it's taking slitting someone's throat high enough up to be able to pull the tongue back down through it, ie, a tongue necktie. In the context of the story, Conchita is a Bolivian Coke Princess and her mom's the boss, hence the reference

Hi Chloe - Congratulations on your win! I just saw this and wanted to say hi. I haven't read the story yet, since with your longer stories I like to wait till I have time to read it w/o too many starts and stops. We have corresponded before, and I'm a big fan of your work, esp NTL, Teddy Bear, and Tales from old Shanghai. Thanks for sharing your gift with us.

Obviously, you only tolerate glowing feedback. I don't read ANY stories with racial slurs. That includes self depreciating slurs. If I were Asian, I'd hate this even more. I know you WILL NOT post this. Too bad.

A story that starts with a fuck scene, slut calling and such, and it wins first price, 19 pages, if it had a nice build up I would love to read it, but my dick shrank beyond visibility after the first few sentences. Nope...

LOL. You gotta get past that first few paragraphs to realize what it' s about.

I am quite fascinated by the mix in your writing, from exceptionally crude to your obviously clear thinking above and beyond the kinky fuckery.

I guess my first thought was "I don't know any women who are that cock-hungry" but my second thought is "I know lots of men who are that cunt-hungry. So why not write about women like that?"

You have an incredible writing style. Very engaging and easy to follow. Thanks for sharing your skills with Lit.

I can see why this was a contest winner. WOW! Don't let the trolls get to ya. There are more of us red pilled than then, they are just more vocal.

I could rate many of your stories with 6 stars out of 5, including this one. Your characters become believable as you write their thoughts in a 'stream of consciousness ' technique. On top of that, the descriptions of the female's experience during sex are exquisite. That is probably why so many of your readers fall in love with you. Including me I'm afraid. Please continue to add to your serial stories. Too many have left me hanging.

Sometimes a forced make over takes you a step up or Two …… Aprils American dream came true and it sounded like she had some kind of fun …… but with that many followers exposing will be on the threshold

✨✨✨✨✨🍀

You seem to always leave me wanting more. Maybe she falls in love with John??!!

It is hard for me to roll my eyes while I'm compulsively reading. I enjoyed this on many levels.

Loved it. Loved the sex scenes and that opening some people are complaining about, well, Ima a white guy and I've dated plenty of Asian women, even married one, and only one never brought up trying race play with me. It could have been the fact that we hadn't dated long enough for us to explore our kinks together.

Just read for second maybe third time after already commenting. Could not help myself. So much fun, tongue in cheek sarcasm and commentary at one level, but also a personal story as long as you don’t take her too seriously. You are having too much fun creating this stuff. Love it.