by funkitty
Your story has what many lesbian stories miss, which is that regardless of the genders involved, good sex requires a Dom & a sub. Keep it up. Oh, and don't forget to spank her!
i loved the story and can't wait to read the next part, thank you
I love this story. A long slow buld up to this lesbian domination.
Hope the next part's going to be posted soon!
You are doing a fine job of matriculating the delicious Tiffany into the lesbian experience. I particularly enjoy the subtle, maddeningly slow but dominant techniques employed to seduce this babe. Do take your time turning this babe all the way inside out. Thanks and hope to be reading you for a long, long time.
At first wasn't sure about this but now really looking forward to part 2.
i wasn't sure about this at first but when i finished it i thought to myslelf, where's the rest of it? this is turning me on so can you please write more?
Tiffany is not only being seduced...but, so, are we; your readers please...write more!!
Please say your writing it! I am waiting with bated breath.
As other people have said I enjoyed your story and am looking forward to another installment.
As other people have also said I wasn't sure about your story at first. For me, this had to do mainly with the punctuation and sentence structure. There were places where it seemed that you joined several separate sentences together by placing a comma between them.
However, as I progressed through the story it seemed that you had improved with practice as I stopped being distracted by grammer. Either that, or the story go hot enough that I stopped paying attention to trivia...
Good luck as you continue writing.
Again, another apology. I have contacted member help as to why my story is taking so long to go from 'pending' to 'approved' as I uploaded it quite a while ago. Hopefully it will go through soon and thank you for all the wonderful feedback!
It is apparent that it is a written from a male perspective. It is utterly unbelievable that the main character is a female, especially in the way she is described. Unrealistic.
Don't listen to that kid, he/she can't even speak English so how can they possibly think they have the right to critique your writing? Honestly, I loved it; can't wait for more.
I wish I could find a girl that would let me eat her pussy...ri I've always wanted to try It...this was a good start of a story