An Indecent Proposal

Second, I needed a new place to live. I called my friend Pete. Pete had lots of friends, because he had a pickup truck. People were always calling him for help with moving. I told him what happened.

"She did what? Left? Just because some rich asshole waved a bunch of money at her? Damn, that's cold! I can't believe she would do that!"

"Believe it. I'm still in shock. Need to find a place to live and get my crap out of the apartment before she gets back on Sunday. Thinking about that extended stay motel near the office."

"Absolutely not! You can stay with me. How much crap do you have to move?"

"Not much, really. Clothes, a few books, stuff like that. I don't care about the furniture."

"OK, get packing. I'll dig up some boxes and be there as soon as I can."

I packed a week's worth of clothes into a duffel bag. The rest went into garbage bags. Pete showed up with some boxes and we loaded them up with books and a few other miscellaneous possessions. I didn't care about anything in the kitchen. Silverware is cheap.

All my stuff was packed into Pete's truck or my car. I looked around the apartment to make sure I had everything. I saw a picture of Jill and I at our wedding. It was one of my favorite pictures of us. Was. I decided to be petty.

I removed the picture from the frame, tore it in half, and put the pieces on the coffee table next to Jill's purse. Then I removed my wedding ring and put it on top.

I thought for a second and decided to be extra petty. We had a fireplace, and a couple of fire logs. I put one of them into the fireplace. I got our wedding album off the shelf, opened it to the middle, draped it over the fire log, and lit the thing.

Then I left and followed Pete over to his place.

I wasn't very good company that night, but I wasn't trying to be. I know I watched a bunch of TV, but I can't remember any of it. All I could think was that my wife had dumped me to go fuck a billionaire for money. Eventually I took a dose of NyQuil and fell asleep.

I woke up late Sunday morning. I felt better physically, but I was still a wreck emotionally. Pete kept trying to get me to engage in conversation, but I wasn't feeling it. I thought about drinking, but knew that wouldn't solve anything.

Eventually, my phone rang. I saw that it was from Jill and declined so that it would go to voicemail. I didn't want to talk to her at all.

Then she sent me a text. "I'm back. Please call me. We need to talk. Nothing happened! NOTHING!"

Yeah, right. And even if that was true, it didn't matter. She ditched me knowing that something could have happened, and was willing to do it.

Then I remembered something. I fired up my laptop.

----------------------------

JILL

He wasn't in the living room. I went into the bedroom. He wasn't there either. Then I saw the open closet. His stuff was gone.

"No no no!" He had left! I ran back into the living room and looked for a note or anything.

Then I saw what was on the coffee table and collapsed onto the sofa. It was our wedding picture, torn in half, and Jack's wedding ring on top.

I don't know how long I sat there. Could have been a minute, could have been an hour. Then I realized that I had to find Jack! I had to tell him that nothing happened!

I grabbed my phone and called him. It went straight to voicemail. I left a message. "Jack honey! Where are you? Please call me! We need to talk. I love you!"

Then I sent him a text. "I'm back. Please call me. We need to talk. Nothing happened! NOTHING!"

I looked around the room. Some of the bookshelves were empty. He'd taken his books! He's moved out! Then I saw the fireplace. It looked like... NO NO NO.... Our wedding album! It was half burned. No! This couldn't be happening! I had to talk to him!

----------------------------

JACK

Then I remembered something. I fired up my laptop.

I logged onto the bank's website and looked at the shared account. There was a fresh deposit of $1.4 million into the savings account.

I transferred $700K to my new account and logged off. If my marriage was going to be destroyed because of money, I was going to get my half.

----------------------------

EPILOGUE

They stared at each other over a conference table in a lawyer's office. The lawyers had just stepped out allowing them to have a private conversation.

"Jill, you said you'd sign the divorce papers if I'd talk to you. Here I am. Talk."

It was the first time they'd spoken to each other since that night at the restaurant.

"Jack, I don't want a divorce. Nothing happened! All he did was make me do home maintenance chores! I painted a room. I cleaned a bathroom. I mowed a lawn. I didn't do anything else! I didn't do anything the least bit sexual! I did not break my vows!"

"You don't get it. You ditched me at the restaurant thinking that you'd be fucking him. It doesn't matter whether you fucked him or not. You left me intending to fuck him. That's all that matters."

"I know. You're right. I can't ever make that up to you. But I have to ask you to please let me try. I love you. We can get past it. I know we can."

"Loving you is not the problem. In spite of everything, I still love you."

Jill looked up hopefully.

"But!" he continued, "I can't trust you anymore. Who's to say you won't make some other big unilateral decision in the future? I mean, if you'll agree to fuck another guy for money, what else would you do if you think it would 'be good for us'? I'm sorry Jill, but I can't get past this. Please sign. The split is 50/50, I've taken everything out of the apartment that I want, and I already took half the money. Sign, and we're done."

With that, Jack got up and walked out.

Jill sat silently for a moment. She grabbed a pen and signed the papers in front of her and walked out herself.