All Comments on 'Andi's Dream - A Blizzard in Buffalo'

Almost perfect! Maybe your best story yet.

5

long, but definitely romance

Very nice - the last line is brilliant. I enjoyed the story and the journey. It is very well written and emotive. Thank you

I was surprised that was the end. Long but I like a long one and very detailed. Loved the little details like the girls calling omelette hamlets, etc. Excellent throughout

Not sure if you've finished it there or there will be a part 2 as there seem so many untied ends around.

What a really good story, kept me till the end.

Well done!!!

S

Great story, but it seems to stop mid way. Is there a part 2 coming?

Loved it.

Liked the characters and the story.

Thank you for a pleasant read.

Great story would love to see a 2nd part

A wonderful story....but, somebody forgot the ending or the to be continued.

Five stars plus

Story makes me want to crash into a ditch thank u

A nice half finished story. If it was finished it would be a 5* but now it is unrated.

Thank you so much for all the great feedback. This was a writing exercise from 2020 that ended here. I finally dressed it up for the contest and thanks to the love you've shown, follow up stories will become a Christmas event

Andi's Dream-PreWedding Gitters

Andi's Dream-The Wedding

Andi's Dream-Andi's Dream

This story is the Genesis of We're a Wonderful Wife and Stormwatch so I'll pull in a few of those characters also.

Thank you so much!

This was a wonderful surprise. It is even more amazing that it was your first long story. Thanks

Part 2 please!

@ender2k2k The original story from back in 2020 goes over 210,000 words. Most of it is so poorly written, but I was just throwing ideas on the page.... and the ideas in there! I love the ideas. That's why I tell new writers "Never throw anything away." What I did here was to pull out the ideas from the first 50k of words and edit, edit, edit, edit... Looks like I have my work cut out for me

Lovely story. Read it while it was raining outside. Very appropriate. Thanx. Chrissy

It's a 6 star for me. How long do we have to wait for the wedding & the trip to Florida?

Some son making and other details are required.

Wonderful story. A good proofreader could clean up quite a few errors.

No way is the former doctor Andi backing out of the deal now. Not with 10 car dealerships in the bag, not to mention a mansion in town, a vacation hobby farm out of town, a place in Florida, a boat and who knows what else. Plus her prospective husband has twenty odd years on her and no doubt a handsome insurance policy. Instead of Christmas songs she's probably humming "We're in the Money". Andi's dream blew in from Lake Erie that's for sure. 5 stars

You get ten stars for mentioning Damon Runyon. Love the story. This may be your best Christmas story. Which is saying a lot.

Guess I'm more interested in the payoff of the football bet. ;) Maybe too much for this story, it is plenty hot enough already.

Great mix of romance and sex.

Anyway thanks for the great story and shoutout to Damon Runyon. I did theatre in college and we did 'A Slight Case of Murder' and of course 'Guys and Doll's' so I did a lot of research reading Damon Runyon stories. What a great story teller.

I enjoyed the story and would very much like to read part 2, 3, etc. Two tiny errors, in my opinion. "The damn broke and Andi broke down into tears at the thought of neighbors waking up at sunrise to help another neighbor in need." I think the sentence should start, "The dam broke..." The New York Giants may play in the New Jersey Meadowlands but most fans wouldn't say that the Bills are the only New York NFL team.

Is there a follow-up coming? Bit abrupt ending if not.

I liked it, enjoyable read. One nit, I believe all Kubota tractors are diesel, not gas. Source: have 2 Kubota tractors and a Kubota excavator. I bleed orange :-)

The daddy sex talk was weird, but you lost me when she wouldn’t let her children call him daddy.

Everything changed and happened way too quickly. This should've been a multi chaptered story taking 4 to 5 chapters, at least, for them to fall in love. I love the plot and the writing. But the execution...not so much.

I'm so glad I happened upon your story. It is my first of yours, but not my last. I confess I tend to shy away from lengthy writing's as they tend to ramble, become repetitive, and I lose interest. Your writing captured me, and I couldn't stop reading. Thank you for what you do.

I've added you to my select few of favorites.

WTH? You stopped there after 13 pages? You're killing me! Some bumps in the plot lines were the twins were way too advanced for five year old's to get my buy-in. You overplayed her reluctance to think our good doctor was an axe murderer when it was well established he was loved and respected in the community. Otherwise, pretty good story - SO FAR! LOL! 4.7*

Fantastic story, can't wait for more. As a Buffalo native now living in SC I love the setting and the nods to the old WNY. Side note though, if you're gonna talk Bills, Kelly wire 12. 😁

Definitely a "5" story. However I gave it a "4" because the "daddy" talk is really creepy. It takes me out of the bubble the story has created each time it is said. It also makes me wonder if Andi has some other issues. The story was very engaging and the long form of 13 pages works well for the story. I would to find out more about this couple as the relationship develops. Please lose the "daddy" talk.

My good man, you have out kicked your coverage!!, Glad you’re back with the Stormwatch people. Laying the ground work for Josh’s recovery with Andi and others help. Just finished this story today and loo and behold you published second part today. On to reading it. Thanks

Fantastic story, loved reading all of it.

Nice story with interesting character development. But it’s either about 3 pages too long or 5+ pages too short.

I'm going to nit-pick. Jim Kelly was number 12. As was Daryle Lamonica ad Joe Ferguson before him. 14 was his cohort Frank Reich and more recently Ryan Fitzpatrick and Stephon Diggs. Even being from Chic ca da waga dere I don't think you would confuse da Youngman (I-290) wit da Niagara Truway (I-190). GO BILLS!

Ha! Genny Cream, my first beer around 1969 I think. I enjoyed the story, did jump some but it’s your story and I’m happy you shared it. The daddy thing with Andi and Paul really did bug me, but it’s your story.

Side note, it’s Jan 17 2024 as I write this living in Denver. Just a couple days after the Bills beat the Steelers after a day delay in playing due to a lake effect storm dumping a couple feet of snow in the southtowns. Love it when a story is set in an area I know well.

A Great Work of ART !

I Thoroughly Enjoyed IT !

THANK YOU !

I was raised in Western New York and trout fished the small streams around Morton Corners and . also went through Springville all the time. I am living in Chicago and it was so good to hear a story from my home town. I lived for snow and went to UB for course work and my sister graduated from State Teachers College in Buffalo. I was a pastor for Trinity Gold Street church in south buffalo...What a wonderful story and son true about the snow in the snow belt.

Was there anything more said about his dead wife after the mention of her death from taking Plan B?