Anne - Whole World Come Undone

That's what cheating does. It destroys trust. It puts into question every action, every decision, every word that has come out of the cheaters mouth. All of it is now tainted. All of it is now slathered with the acrid musk of deceit and betrayal.

The three of them tried to make the most of a very bad situation, but it was pointless. There was no fun to be had. They swam, they water-skied, they walked, they lazed by the pool. Most of all, they talked and talked, about things that they knew and how the future was now looking. The girls accepted that their parents would divorce. Their father was never going to be able to forget, none of them were, and forgiveness would be a long time coming, if ever.

Steve tried to get the girls to talk less harshly about their mother, but it was a hard sell after what they had seen, and what they all knew was lost to them. What they thought was an amazingly happy and loving family, had been ripped apart. The girls, especially Christine, vocalised a lot of the hard questions over the few days they were there, that Steve was asking himself. Steve was thankful that they never voiced, and hopefully never even considered his worst fear, that he was not their biological parent. That would crush them, and if it was true, destroy them all. As much as he knew it will kill him, he also knew that he would have to find out. Not that it would have any impact on how he felt about his daughters, and they were his, no matter what the result. But the idea, that some other man could come along, and make claims on them as his own, was making him feel physically ill every time he thought of it.

Over the four days and three nights that her family were missing, Anne was slowly going insane. She had no idea where they were, and she couldn't call anyone. How could she possibly explain why they were gone, or why she didn't know where they were. She thought of calling her mother-in-law but just couldn't do it. She was lost in a sea of self-loathing and despair. All she did was cry and ache all over as she awaited some sign, some forlorn hope that they hadn't completely abandoned her.

Steve looked at his two beautiful girls as they exited the airport terminal on Sunday afternoon and headed towards the long term parking area. Their faces had aged years it seemed in the blink of an eye. They had all been forced to face a lot of truths over the last four days. Life as they knew it was forever and irrevocably changed. The girls had confirmed that they had no interest in living with their mother. There was way too much pain still to be processed for all of them, and just looking at their Mother was going to cause them to relive certain aspects of the cause of that pain.

Arriving at their house, no longer a home, the three sat quietly in the open garage, the rising tension was palpable. Annes' car was still there and they expected the sound of the garage door opening to get her attention, so they sat and waited in silence to see if she appeared. With a deep and tense sigh, Steve made the first move to exit the car when Anne didn't appear. 'Maybe she wasn't home' was a sadly universal thought at this stage.

Steve and the girls grabbed their bags and made their way into their house. They had talked about this and tried to prepare themselves for the first time they saw Anne again, but the here and now was a lot more intense emotionally than they could have predicted. It was a strange feeling, the tension was rising as they were almost preparing to defend themselves from an assailant. Their eyes darted around, first the kitchen, then dining and finally the lounge room, as they entered, each cautiously with their guard well and truly up.

The house was quiet as were they, as they made their way through to their bedrooms. They noticed the master bedroom door was closed, all three now coming to a stop as they stared. Steve opened the door and they saw a lump under the bedclothes, and assumed correctly it was Anne. Bags were dropped into each girls bedroom and the threesome retreated to the kitchen to ponder things. The girls were holding their Fathers hands and finding support in each other. It was a horrible time for them and they knew it was only going to get worse.

Steve finally looked at what there was in the fridge and pantry for dinner and realised there was nothing added to either since they left Thursday morning. He was in no mood now to cook, knowing Anne was in her bedroom. He could no longer call it his. His, now massive amounts of self-doubt and insecurities about Annes fidelity had destroyed his trust. Now everywhere he looked in his house, was a place that Anne could have fucked someone else behind his back. He looked at the dining room table,

"Come on girls, let's go get something for dinner" He said sadly.

They returned to his car and left with no real destination in mind.

Anne stirred and her eyes opened. Did she hear something? She wasn't sure anymore. She had lost hope by this stage and was doing little more than existing at this point. Dragging herself out of bed, she made her way to the kitchen. She had eaten hardly anything for the past four days, living primarily on strong black coffee. Her phone had rung a few times but since it wasn't Steve, she let them go to voicemail.

As she passed her daughters' rooms, she suddenly came to a halt. There were bags in their rooms. She was shocked, elated and fearful. Her pulse sky rocketed and her breathing became laboured as she moved down the hallway. She noticed Steves bag in the spare bedroom and she sobbed at the implication. Trying to hold herself together she moved through the lounge into the dining room and finally stopped in the kitchen. They weren't here. Anne sat at the kitchen bench and sobbed as the pain she had been dealing with flowed over her again.

An hour later, Anne heard the garage door opening. She sat tensely and expectantly as she waited for her family to come in. What would they say or do? What would she? She had managed to pull herself together somewhat, knowing that they were back, and hoped they would return again soon.

Christine was the first through the door and came to an abrupt halt as Bianca walked into her back with a squeal. They both just stared at their Mother with tense faces and furrowed brows, their breathing short and strained. By this time Steve had moved up behind them and the four just stared blankly at each other for a few moments. Anne sobbed and rose from her seat as she began to move towards her family.

"Don't!" was almost hissed at her from Christine, causing Anne to stop in her tracks. Her faced screwed up as a wail came from her collapsing body as she looked into the deadened eyes of her daughters. In a scene all to reminiscent of Thursday morning when they first discovered her betrayal, Anne sat bawling on the floor, while desperately pleading through woeful sobs, her hand extended to her family for comfort and forgiveness. None was forthcoming.

Once again, her family walked past her and went to the spare bedroom and closed the door. Steve did notice, with some distaste, that she now wore her wedding rings. 'A bit late for that now you cheating slut', he thought.

Anne sat dejectedly on the floor for some time. No one checked up on her and she had never felt more alone in her life. Self-pity was rife in her mind as she struggled to reconcile what she has done to herself and her family. The pain of realising the devastation she has caused her once amazing family was almost unbearable. And there was still so much more pain to come. Extended family and friends were yet to learn what she has done. They would all be disgusted, no more than she now was in herself. She knew that she had thrown everything away, all for a fling with a younger man because she was feeling old. 'Well how are you feeling now, you stupid slut?' she asked herself as she again cried over her agonising loss, that was all too clear to her now.

Steve and Bianca sat cuddled on the bed in the spare bedroom, again lost in thought and pain, as Christine paced back and forth, getting increasingly agitated.

"Nanna, you need to come to the house right now!" Steve suddenly heard Christine say. He looked up to see Christine on her phone and asked what she was doing.

"Someone has to be with Mum." She stated. "I hate her and I don't want to have to deal with her. Do you?"

Steve nodded no, and resigned himself to the fact that his Mother-in-law would be there in about 20 minutes or so. He thought it wasn't the best option and wished Christine hadn't been so impulsive, but it was done now and had to be dealt with.

When they heard the door bell, they all left the bedroom and wandered into the lounge room. Anne was still in the kitchen, and had at least gotten herself onto a chair at the table. She was staring blankly at the glass of water in front of her, and didn't even register their presence as they walked by. Steve opened the door to a distressed Coral Ambrose, Anne's mother, and Larry Ambrose, her father, standing behind her with a furrowed brow.

"What on earth is going on Steve?" she questioned as she quickly walked in. "That call from Christine was so short, it's made me frantic. Is Anne ok? Are the kids ok? Did something happen? What's going on Steve, why do you all look so upset?" she finished as she looked at the three standing there.

Steve resigned himself to having to deal with things, something he was in a way, hoping to somehow avoid forever. Taking a long deep breath, he let out slow, sad sigh. He looked at the scared face of Bianca, and the much angrier and harsher face of Christine before beginning.

"Coral, Anne's in the kitchen. Maybe you should go see to her for a few minutes before we go any further." Steve suggested.

Coral was concerned, but also confused as to why her two daughters were not with their Mother. They seemed to be hovering closely to their Father and all of them were in some emotional pain, it was all over their faces. She knew she wasn't going to like what she was going to see and hear as she made her way into the kitchen.

Larry Ambrose was a quiet man, always listening more than talking. Always looking and really seeing what was in front of him before acting. What he'd seen and heard so far was very disconcerting. His son-in-law was tired and depressed, his beautiful grand-daughters were sallow and on the tipping point of emotion. Whatever was going on, was destroying them. He feared the worse. Cancer? Disease? Or the one thing he didn't want to consider, infidelity.

Coral paused and stared at her daughter as she sat at the table in front of her. Anne's vibrancy was gone. Her once serene and cheerful demeanour crushed by a weight of pain and anguish as she now looked at her Mother. Anne got to her feet and seeing her Mum's open arms, moved quickly to be enveloped by the loving embrace. An embrace she wasn't guaranteed to receive again once her arrogance and stupidity was revealed. She cried woefully in her Mothers arms, great wracking sobs of heartache flowing from her.

Larry sat quietly with Steve and the girls in the lounge room, as they listened to his daughters emotional release. He wanted to go to his child, but he also wanted to see her family's reaction. Larry again studied them as they huddled close together for support and comfort, their eyes blank and devoid of any real emotion. 'This is real bad' he thought to himself. 'None of them were even tempted to go to Anne, and other than what looked like a snarling smirk from Christine, there was nothing. What has she done to them? God, please don't let it be cheating. Not Anne, please'

Anne finally started to quiet down as she allowed her Mother to move her back to the chair she had previously been seated in. Drawing another chair next to it, Coral sat and held her daughter as she cooed and tried to sooth her.

"It's alright baby, I'm here, your Dad's here, your family's here. Whatever the problem is, we're all here and we'll get through it. We all love you" Coral softly spoke.

For the next few minutes the house was filled with the sounds of Anne's tortured soul as her honest belief that her family did NOT love her, caused her to break down and cry piteously all over again.

Larry could hold off no longer and went to join his wife and daughter to support them both. His fears were evident on his face as he looked into the sad eyes of his wife of over forty years. They both knew that whatever has happened, Anne was the sole cause, and it has quite possibly, destroyed her family.

It took a long time, with several stops for her crying, but Anne finally got out what had happened while she was at the conference. By this time the whole family was sitting around the kitchen table. Coral and Larry were shocked beyond anything they have ever been before. Anne was bawling and pleading for forgiveness all at the same time. Steve and Christine were almost impassive, while Bianca hugged her Father and wept into his chest.

Steve's emotions were somehow deadened. He felt nothing for Annes' pain. No sympathy, no desire to comfort the woman he once loved. Yes, he accepted, he no longer loved her. Some say you can't turn love off like a tap, no matter what has happened. Well, Steve realised, he could. From the highest of highs, that his love once was, it was only despair and disgust that fuelled his emotions now.

Anne had pushed him off a cliff in the worst possible way he could imagine. He was once safe, secure and happy. The love of his family, and the love he felt for his family, was immoveable and impenetrable, or so he thought. The absolute betrayal that she had perpetrated was soul destroying. There was no excuses that could explain it away, no perverse self-serving rationalities that could absolve her. The marriage was done, simple. He'd had days to think and anguish. Days spent running an endless parade of thoughts and emotions through his head, trying to search his heart for a glimmer, a spark, of hope, for his sake, for the sake of his precious girls.

His girls. Yes, no matter what, they were his. He would fight the world to keep them, no matter what any test may tell him. Did he even want those tests? Did he want to know? Did the girls need to know? 'God damn you Anne!'

Sure, the last few days could have been handled a hell of a lot better by him, especially as far as the girls were concerned, but they saw it all, up close and personal at the same time and in the same way as he did. He was barely able to hold his own mind together, let alone being cohesive enough to deal with his daughters emotions. 'God, what a fucking mess.'

Anne spent almost the next hour pleading with her family for forgiveness, for another chance. It was a mistake, she was feeling old and unattractive, she was seduced, it meant nothing to her, it was just sex, just a fling, they could get past it and be happy again like they were. And on and on, and round and round it went until Anne made a final, fatal error.

"Think of the kids Steve, They don't deserve to have a broken home. You can't do that to them."

Steve, by this time had been on a slow boil as she was rolling out the best of the Cheaters Handbook of Excuses, obviously sold in all major bookstores, since it sounded so formulaic.

He quickly came to his feet and just stared at Anne with disdain.

"YOU did this. YOU caused all this. YOU betrayed me, betrayed the girls, betrayed US! For what Anne? FOR WHAT? So you could feel younger, more attractive to other men, younger men? Well congratulations. We are done. You can have all the younger men you want, and feel as young as they make you. Your pathetic justifications disgust me. You disgust me. Coral, Larry, please take your daughter home with you. I will be seeing a Lawyer in the morning. It's over."

Anne collapsed with a wailing "NOOOOOO" as what Steve said sunk in. She watched as he walked out of the kitchen, followed by a scowling Christine. Poor Bianca just sat and hugged her Grand-mother as she cried. All but Anne seemed to know this decision was coming, but it was still hard on everyone.

Anne was eventually helped to her parents car. Coral and a sobbing Bianca, packed a couple of bags of clothes for Anne to take with her. Larry was worried that Anne was having some sort of breakdown, as she sat in the back seat muttering and shaking her head constantly.

He tried to reason with Steve, but knew it was pointless. He couldn't accept his daughters behaviour in the slightest, so had no sincere hope of changing Steves' mind. But he did make a token effort.

As was expected, Steve met with a Lawyer that following week and sought a divorce. He petitioned for sole custody and got it without even a whimper from Anne. She knew the girls were devastated by her actions and Christine especially, wouldn't even talk to her. She wasn't going to force them to live with her, she had lost that right with her actions.

The split of assets was close to 70/30 in Steves' favour. He kept the house and took over the mortgage, while Anne moved to her parents, needing at least some support. Anne remained at work, and had her pay garnished for Child Support.

Steve needed some assistance with baby-sitting the girls because of his work hours. Anne cried initially when Coral was asked to be at what was now Steves' house when the girls came home. She knew that they didn't want it to be her, even if she could get the time off work.

All four of them needed counselling for some time after this all happened. Anne was never able to truly understand, let alone justify, even to herself, why she did what she did.

Steve and the girls saw a nice therapist for a few months, who's efforts made the pain lessen and the transition to a broken home more tolerable. The memories of their Mother from that hotel room were especially hard for the girls to get over.

Anne was given reasonable access, but was at the whim of her daughters. Initially, they didn't want to see or talk to her very much. The pain and memories were too fresh. Over time, Bianca softened the first, but Christine held out much, much longer. It took some joint sessions with the Therapist and her Mother to sooth the pain enough for at least some dialogue.

Steve had no interest in ever seeing Anne again, and only communicated through email if needed regarding the girls. He held onto the pain of loss for a much longer time.