All Comments on 'Apocalypse Wow, Pt. 02'

More please

Again, Nice apocalyptic story, and well written...5 Stars

Sorry, I gave up. The constant "like, I mean, you know", etc. were grating on my nerves too much. I completely get that this is supposed to be a transcript, and it even may be a realistic one, and the concept even is an interesting one, and very well executed to boot, I just couldn't stomach it anymore.

Not gonna vote, don't want to blemish this otherwise outstanding tale.

So let me get this straight, "Jim" is a 16yr old valley girl?

Who are these idiot commentators? This is a great story!!

There is a great story hidden inside, but it’s difficult to appreciate through the bad grammar and awkward storytelling. I really hope you take another shot at this. Maybe find someone to help you edit. I’d love to come back to a revised version. But as it stands right now, like… I can’t keep reading, you know?

While I love the post-apocalyptic premise, I can’t take Jim’s immature teen-like ramblings anymore. He’s a science teacher, but he sounds like an immature girl in how he talks. I gave it two chapters… that’s all I can take, sorry. 3 stars from me. You gotta polish up your writing and you might have something here. I think a classic narration might be better rather than this odd first person story telling method you’re using. It’s very distracting and annoying.