Arnie 01

"Sally!"

"Babe!"

"Ahh, hello, attention everyone in the car, am I lying?"

So, you see, folks, cars get eerily quiet when nobody speaks, so. Also, stupid smart girl knowledge and logic.

"And quite frankly, I'm happy about all the baby oil Brad uses when he whacks off to your sexy and nude silhouette photo, Arnie, I mean, at least I don't have to deal with rough and chaffed cock skin, so."

"Sally!"

"Babe!"

"What, too much info? Ooh, ooh, honey, if you need gas, whip it into the filling station right there! I hear that Arnie is quite popular there every few weeks, so."

[Screech, hard left, roll to a rocking stop, park]

"Pump it, Arnie, just like you want to watch my step brother, Mickey, pump it for you!"

You see, folks, sometimes a quiet car is the best car.

"(Squeal, squawk) Pump 3, this isn't funny if this is a 3-way thing with my favorite (squeak) customer (squeal, squawk)."

"OMFG, it's true then!"

[Unknown, but furious texting]

"Sally, Sally, just go, well, go inside and get some stuff!"

"Can I slide my finger between your butt crack and give Henry some stuff to sniff?"

"Sally!"

"Babe!"

"Well, fine, I just wanted to get all up in there before my step brother does, so."

"Sally! Wait, did you text Mickey?"

"You need a real boyfriend, Arnie!"

[Vroom, vroom, screech, sliding in sideways, whoop, whoop, wheel hop, whoop]

"Um, I was in the neighborhood and I was driving on Sycamore Steet and then I saw your hair, Arnie and then, tee he, I just pulled in. Sideways, so?"

"Mickey, I'm busy pumping gasoline!"

"And I'm going inside to be with Sally or Henry or literally anyone else! Hey, Mickey."

Yeah, Brad had enough. And so did I, I think.

"Anyways, Arnie, um, you look nice, like you're dressed for a date, so?"

"Oh, and is that short for you're going to schmooze me and then expect me to be your little bitch boy right from the get go and be rude about it too, hmm Mickey?"

"Nah, that's third date stuff. Just kidding, Arnie, so?"

"Well, I've been on the Strip twice tonight and I've been in the Malt Shop once and the river parks are closed by now, so?"

"(Squeak, squawk) the late showing at the movies! Dumbass mother (squeak, squawk)."

"Oh, I know, Arnie, we could catch the late showing at the movie theater or something, tee he and I'll even make sure that you can safely use the Men's room, so?"

"(Squeak, squawk) aha, aha, aha (squeak, squawk)."

"Don't flip Henry off, Mickey. He's my gasoline guy. Anyways, Mickey, I've had quite enough for one night, so since your step sister is in there listening to us through the gas pump speaker, I mean, if Sally fills a bag with snacks and beverages, I mean, we could go to my place and watch a movie there or something."

"Sold! What kind of movie, not that I really care, Arnie, hmm?"

"Anime, of course. With the appropriate anime watch attire, so?"

"(Squeak, squawk) aha, aha, aha, OMG, OMG, OMG, aha, aha, aha (squeak, squawk)."

Also.

"(Squeak, squawk) argh, argh, argh, OMG, OMG, OMG, ooh, ooh, ahh (squeak, squawk)."

Well, LOL, Sally filled a bag with goodies alright! Like three bags! And I think Brad's gas was free.

And if you can't figure the rest, well, Mickey and I watched anime, so the sex thing was checked way off of the bucket list. Oh, and my anime watch attire got a new and updated shopping list.

Oh, and I guess I still have my "watch" fantasy. And how I started things out with Mickey didn't count. That was "do" and not "watch", so.

End Arnie 01