All Comments on 'Auntie Fun after the Pool'

Loved it

All the errors in language/punctuation creates a barrier to the story.

I think this could have been a good one except for the many, many errors in spelling and word usage. One or two maybe, but this author got really worse the more he wrote.

A good editor could have saved this as the story line was great. But, he totally sank his own ship.

it could have been a much better story still if you, or someone else, had read it through for errors before you submitted it. I know this is an amateur site and that you want to get your work up and published, but you owe it to yourself -- and the readers you hope to attract -- to make a better presentation of it than this is,

Please keep writing, and try to get some help from someone who knows more about writing and publishing. Three stars,

I agree - this could have been seriously improved if you had an editor, or at least a proofreader. Otherwise, a good premise.

The "character" supposedly earned a 4.0 in high school.

Either the main character is not an accurate reflection of the author or the author was trying to indicate his/her high school cannot teach spelling, punctuation, and grammar.

This story is an example of bad story writing. BTW, at least the author could have spelled Danielle correctly! (Unless her parents couldn't spell!)

Danniel is a boy's name.

The Aunt is the mild of the family. You meant milf.

Just so many mistakes and dumb sentences. I couldn't finish it.

well I have to disagree with hornack, so many names are interchangeable these days who knows who is whom?

the writing is a problem. It appears English is not your first language. Your tense and moment of time is inappropriate.

Cute tale, worth a couple.

This may have been a good story, but two paragraphs into it I had to stop. Please proof your work or get an editor. Good luck on future writing.

Fucking gibberish. I think you meant to call your aunt "Dannielle", but who knows? Maybe in whatever NON-ENGLISH-SPEAKING-COUNTRY you're from, you can get away with spelling it Danniel. Or maybe you're just really into your uncle Dan. (What is a "mild" of the family, by the way? I never did figure that out.) Did you write this by flogging your keyboard with a shoe? Give it up. And give me back the time I wasted on this piece of rubbish.

Grow up! *

Adolescent twaddle!

I mean it was the persons first time writing so you gotta give them some slack

Still liked the story though. I wrongly assumed this was first in a series which often have a different structure.

Because of that error I was able to enjoy the story.

If a simple assumption can make it acceptable there is content.

Hope there are more.

Woeful. Just woeful.

Unfortunately you can't write and have no sense of how to construct a sentence - let alone an entire paragraph. Get a style manual or go back to grammar school - or both!

You're all reading a sex story about a guy fucking his aunt, take it easy on the guy who wrote it bc you're all sick fucks if you read this anyways, why let grammar be the difference?? Of course, I'm not denying that I'm a sick fuck but that doesn't matter, leave the writer alone, they tried and the story was good.

Great how they are honest about desires

Hope you got your aunt pregnant then married her had more kids me I fucked my aunt got married had 4 kids together that was 18 yrs ago even are boys fuck her gangbang her cum in her cunt ass and down her throat

Terrible grammar, terrible spelling, just can’t get into the writing. Terrible plot