All Comments on 'Bailey’s Butthole'

It is 9 am where I am now, and after reading this story, I have realized that I have had my quota of stupidity for the day.

Thank you for submitting this story. I know it can be tough to show your work to a bunch of people, unsure of how it will be received, but there are quite a few people who value it very much and I'm sure many others who are quietly reading through their screens.

I really enjoyed how it was short and to the point. With some erotica, there's no need for a huge 3-part tale of how Bailey has anal sex because there's nothing more to it, so why exaggerate? With that being said though, I think your story could have benefitted from a bit more foreplay between Bailey and Cole.

You said in the beginning that they were roommates; I assume from that they must be good friends, and as a friend I would think Cole would build up to the anal sex with Bailey since she was hesitant about their last encounter. Even if it's just a few extra kisses over her body to get her worked up, or him being like, "Hey! I know sex is a big deal for you and I want your first time doing it anally to be special, so how about we go see a movie first?" Describe how attractive Cole is for considering to wine & dine her before jumping into the main course. It provides a greater picture of who they are as people without too much fluff.

By building up the story with a little more exposition, it could make it that much more powerful to read. We all know they'll fuck since it's an erotica, but HOW they get there could come from anything. It is up to the writer to make it unique.

Again, nice work and I hope you continue writing <3