tagCelebrities & Fan FictionBatgirl: Last Laugh

Batgirl: Last Laugh

bySean Renaud©

The room is black, not dark but black. The kind of complete darkness where Commissioner James Gordon wasn't certain if his eyes were open or not, it they felt like they were open but he couldn't see. He could smell though, the scent of sawdust and peanuts and the faint aroma of animal droppings. The darkness didn't block his ability to hear either, there were people probably in another room, walking and whispering but he couldn't recognize any of the voices. James could feel the ropes binding his wrists behind his back and the gag painfully stretching his jaw open. He could taste the rubber gag as well not that he wanted to. He had no idea where he was or how he'd gotten there.

"Let me tell you a story Jimmy." James Gordon recognized the voice and it sent a shock of pure terror racing through him. Even if the circumstances were reversed and the psychotic clown was the one handcuffed in a dark room James would still be frightened. The infamous Clown Prince of Crime had that effect on most sane people. "I'm sure you'll like it! It's kinda like a create your own adventure!" Joker screeched. "I bet you want to know why you're here, well let me tell you why you're here."

A flood light came on pointed directly at the Commissioner partially blinding him. He could see the silhouette of the Joker walking towards him. Even the way the man walked was frightening, a cheery swaggering strut. When Joker leaned in close to James he wasn't smiling and his voice had dropped several octaves. "I want you to listen very carefully to me Jim. If you do exactly what I tell you, then you go home, I go home, we all go home. If you don't do what I tell you . . . well you don't want to find out what happens then. Do we have an agreement?" Joker paused for a second looking at Jim Gordon, then raised a brow and canted his head to the side. There was no way of knowing what was going through the clown's head as he stared at the Commissioner for several seconds. "Nod your head if we have an agreement."

One of the first things they teach cops in Gotham is that it's always safest to play along when a crazed psychopath takes you hostage. That goes double for the Joker whose special brand of insanity might have him using a pair of scissors to widen your smile; he also might show up at your poker party to do card tricks. There was no rhyme or reason to any of it but he could hope. Commissioner Gordon nodded his head.

"Good, good. I was afraid we were going to have to plan B. Well you might still need Plan B but that's for later." Joker chuckled slightly. "Harl turn on the lights!"

The room filled with light and it took James several moments of blinking before he could see. The clown was still standing next to him wearing his signature purple suit with the green shirt. "Well Jimmy boy do you like what you see? I did it all for you."

James slowly scanned the room; the first thing he spotted was the Joker's number one henchwoman, Harleen Quinzel better known as the chaotic clown girl Harlequin. Normally she wore a black and red costume that left terribly little to the imagination, whatever the occasion was Joker had dressed her differently for it. She was wearing a lacey red nightie and with black garters. Seeing that she was nearly nude brought Jim's attention to his own lack of clothing, the only thing he was wearing were his glasses. "I see you approve of Ms. Quinn's outfit." Joker commented flatly noticing the first twitches of an erection. "Would you like her to get you started?"

That was a trick question if ever there was one. What man didn't have fantasies about slender young blond contortionists? Even being a happily married man Jim was still a man, of course he wanted her. There was still the pressing matter of figuring out what exactly the Joker was playing at. It wasn't likely that Joker had kidnapped him so Harlequin could have sex with him. It wasn't impossible just very improbable. James nodded his head and the Joker smiled.

"Did you hear that Harley? The Commish would like you to get him started come on over!"

"Coming Mister J." She responded skipping over to the men her breasts bouncing with each move. "So what should I do to him?" Harley asked standing next to him and cocking her hips to one side.

"Whatever you want Harley. Make him happy but don't get him off. That's for later." Joker replied his voice becoming deadly serious at the end.

"Okay." Harley sank to her knees and wrapped her black painted lips around Gordon's hard cock. Seemingly without effort she slipped him completely into her throat grinding her nose against his belly. "He's kinda yummy." She commented coming up for a break of air. Her tongue snaked out from her lips to lash against James' scrotum occasionally pulling it into her mouth and suckling softly. Harley wrapped one hand around his shaft stroking it as she did occasionally moving up to slurp or lick at him again.

"I hope you're enjoying yourself Commissioner. I went through a lot of work to set this all up for you." Joker smiled leaning close. "If I'm not mistaken today is your birthday and I thought long and hard how I could thank you for being such a great upstanding guy." Joker stepped away from the chair James was tied to. "My first thought was a poison gas whoopee cushion lovingly slipped into your office. But then I thought what if someone else sat in your chair first? I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I hurt an innocent person!"

James knew that what the clown was saying might be important. His life might very well hang on being able to remember something that was being said right now but it was increasingly difficult to focus on anything but the nude blonde expertly sucking his cock. The painted woman was took his entire length without effort swirling her tongue over his smooth flesh. Everything that Harley was doing with her mouth made it nearly impossible to focus on anything coming out of the Joker's mouth.

"Harl. Slow down a bit I don't want him to miss out on his gift. Do you?" Joker said turning slowly. In a wild moment James realized that Joker was aroused by the situation his purple slacks forming a tent as he walked. The clown's eyes moved to meet Gordon's then eased down to his situation. "No no. It's a gun in my pocket." To prove his claim Joker reached into his pants and produced a long nosed revolver and pointed it straight at Gordon's head but the tent in his pants remained. "Oopsie. Guess I am happy to see you." Joker giggled, then laughed, then howled each growing a little louder until it seemed certain he'd bust a blood vessel if he kept it up then he stopped suddenly. "Really Jimmy boy I think we should get to the main event. The reason why you're here."

He pulled a remote with a big red button it out of his trousers and pushed a button. Another spot light appeared this time illuminating a woman's body but she was too far away to recognize other than she wore a mask. Another push of the button she was lowered down between Joker and Commissioner James Gordon and at that distance she was unmistakable. "This is the one you were looking at wasn't it Jimmy? I mean you're not. . .into Batman are you?" The Joker grinned. "If you are I'll take this one out back and shoot it and get you another one."

Batgirl's green eyes widened as Joker threatened to shoot her. James didn't notice the look on her face it was to far from her more alluring assets. Joker had taken his time modifying her costume. The tights had been made into chaps; the entire crotch area removed revealing a patch of red curls directly over her smooth shaven slit. Holes were also cut for her breasts just beneath the obscenely stretched yellow Bat symbol on her chest. The mask remained in place keeping her identity secret.

That was one of the things that James had never understood about the psychopaths of Gotham City. Every one of them had had Batman, Robin or Batgirl at their mercy before but never did they peak beneath the mask to find out who they were. The secret identities were sacred in some way that he didn't fully understand but the villains, men and women who raped, killed and maimed for entertainment respected that fact. James Gordon didn't want to know the real people. He had his suspicions on who the Dark Knight and Boy Wonder were but no idea who the woman was with her wrists tied over her head hanging there like a piece of meat for him to observe.

"You know I already explained this to Batgirl but I think you should hear this too Jimmy. Batgirl here has the hots for you. You make her all buttery in her nethers but she doesn't have the balls. . .err ovaries to say anything to you so I've set this all up because I know you feel the same way about her." Joker walked around behind Batgirl hefting on of her breasts to his tongue and lashing his tongue over the bared flesh. Batgirl was doing her best to fight her body but it wasn't working. As soon as the Joker started suckling on her nipples she started squirming like a worm on a hook. Her eyes hooded over with pure lust, her mouth slipping open as a light moan escaped her. As was often true of the Joker he lost interest in her after just a few seconds of pleasuring her he stepped away and started to talk again. "So it's really very simple. You get each other off, you go both go home. You don't and I shoot one of you and the other. . .maybe I run over with a bus? Sound fair?"

"Don't do this Joker!" Batgirl shouted.

"Quiet you. I've seen how you look at him this is exactly what everybody wants." Joker responded walking over to Gordon and pulling the gag from his mouth. "So make your choice do you want to eat hot lead or Batgirl?"

Commissioner James Gordon didn't need to reference the Gotham SOP to make that decision. Joker was right about his attraction to the mysterious Dark Damsel. What man in Gotham didn't lust after Batgirl? She might not have been first on everybody's lists; Harvey Bullock had a news clipping of Catwoman over his desk and had made many crude comments about the feline felon. The former district attorney, Harvey Dent, would have claimed Poison Ivy as his woman of choice but Gordon preferred the good girls and in Gotham City that left Batgirl as the undisputed queen. "I want to eat Batgirl." He answered. Even with the Joker's revolver aimed squarely at him there was no way he'd be able to claim that he made the decision under duress. It was exactly what he wanted.

"Good choice!" Joker laughed producing a switchblade from his pants using it to cut Gordon free. James leapt out of the chair entirely to fast too claim innocence after that. He hooked Batgirl's legs and put them over his shoulders relieving most of the pressure on her wrists and twisted his tongue into her shaven slit. Being in his fifties had some advantages when it came to pleasing a woman. He knew exactly what every subtle twitch of her thighs meant. It only took him a few seconds to chase her clit out of its hiding spot and wrap his lips around it. "Damn old man knows how to get it done doesn't he Harley?" Joker whistled reaching one hand into his pants to stroke his cock.

"Sure does Mr. J. B G seems to be enjoying it too." Harlequin responded looking up at her oft time rival. Harley's hand slipped beneath the nightie flicking against her clit. There was no denying that the look on Batgirl's face was one of pure rapture. She was trying to fight down the screams and she managed to strangle them down to mere whimpers and moans. Batgirl had no control over her hips. They were twisting of their own accord forcing James' tongue to follow her this way and that to keep after her clit. Each time he caught it a jolt shot through the heroine arching her back and clenching her thighs around his head. "Why don't yo-"

Harley was cut off when Joker smacked her across the face hard enough to bring tears to her painted face. She should have known better than to ask the psychotic clown to pleasure her but then again she was more than a little masochistic and along with the tears came a smile. A smile that was wiped off her silly face but a punch to the gut that left her breathless but more importantly it left her doubled over with her mouth wide open. Harley managed to squeak out a complaint just before Joker stuffed his cock into her throat. With one hand he twisted the pompoms that held her pig tails over her head and used them to wrench her head up and down. Harley tried to get a grip on his thighs and pull back enough to catch her breath but Joker wouldn't allow it and continued to brutally skull fuck his sidekick. "Go on let her down Jimmy boy." Joker said waving his gun at the Commissioner and Batgirl. "Just don't untie her hands and Batgirl, I wouldn't try anything heroic.

Batgirl probably weighed just a bit over one hundred pounds, lifting her up off the hook that held her took next to no effort setting her on her back. "Spread your legs Batgirl. I don't want to give that lunatic a reason to kill either of us."

Batgirl. Barbara Gordon looked away from her father as a hot blush flushed over her entire body turning her pale skin pink. She obeyed the thinly veiled request and spread her well toned thighs. He wanted her, it wasn't the Joker's gun that had James fully erect and about to push into her. If the danger passed he'd still keep pushing into her. He didn't know it was her beneath the mask. James was completely unaware that the tight folds squeezing shut around his cock belonged to his dear daughter. The only thing he was focused on was how it felt to slide into her warm wet hole. James wrapped his arms around Batgirl holding her slender frame tight as he sank into completely into her. He let the young woman adjust to him inside her for a moment before he started pumping against her.

My God Dad is good. Barbara thought as she squinted her eyes shut trying partially to block out the reality of her twisted situation. As much as her mind was trying to keep focused her father wasn't letting her body off nearly as easily. Her body was completely betraying her wishes quivering at the older man's touch. His hands were on her breasts massaging her flesh. It was no wonder he'd had a successful marriage. In addition to being a great man he was incredible in the sack.

Less than five feet away the Joker was still throat fucking Harlequin who by now was a complete mess. A combination of tears and spit coated her cheeks and dripped down onto her tits pooling on the floor. The thick black eye shadow she wore was running in long black tears down her face and the white foundation that covered her face was starting to spot revealing her pinkish flesh. Every time Joker thrust forward there was a loud quaffing sound sputtered out of Harley's lips along with bubbles of spittle. "How's going over there Gordon?" Joker called.

That voice snapped him back from the fantasy for a split second. "Just fine." He growled. At the moment he wasn't scared of Joker, just angry that his attention had been pulled away from Batgirl. "I'm sorry about this but we should do what he says and make the best of this situation." Batgirl nodded not trusting her voice to betray either her identity or her lust. James took her by the waist and twisted her over onto all fours before easing back into her.

So deep. Barbara thought as her hips started rocking back against his. She knew it was wrong but it felt so good. It was her first time with an older man but there was definitely something to be said for experience. She didn't even know what he was doing with his hands but one was wrapped around her waist sending the most incredible shocks through her clit with her fingers. The other hand was pressed against her asshole, it wasn't pushed in instead it was just circling her tight virginal hole. At first she tensed up but it was actually a nice feeling. Biting down on her lower lip she pushed her ass up invitingly. James took the hint and eased his thumb into the caped cutie's rectum. It feels so good in my ass. Batgirl thought thrusting her hips back against the intruder until it was completely inside her. "Harder Commissioner!" Batgirl squealed unable to hold it back any longer.

No man alive would have rejected that request from Batgirl. Especially not a man who was on the of his own orgasm. He could feel hers building as well, her already that already fit like a second skin squeezed down pulling him deeper into her. Batgirl was fucking her father as hard as she could manage moaning louder and louder before the sudden thought hit her that she couldn't let him cum inside her. "Not inside me!" She was a second too late with that plea. James pulled her against him and thrust as far into her as he could manage as he came flooding her insides with his cum. The sheer taboo of what had just happened sent Batgirl over the edge with an orgasm that rocked through her entire body before leaving her slack.

For a moment she was able to bask in the glow of her orgasm, not even concerned that her own father's semen was oozing out of her pussy as she lay there. It didn't matter that her most private places were lewdly on display pushed up as if she wanted more. All that mattered was the faint feeling in her head and the weakness in her legs. That moment was shattered when she heard the Clown Prince of Crime laughing. "Well show's almost over." He pushed a button and Batgirl noticed a faint red light in the darkness, then another and another. Cameras. "But my first porn needs a big finish!" He pulled Harlequin off his cock which oddly enough matched the rest of his ghastly white skin tossing her the revolver as well. Batgirl wasn't sure what he had in mind until after he'd done it. "Every porn ends with a facial!" He reached down with and tore Batgirl's mask off aiming his cock and spraying her face with his cum.

"Gross!" Batgirl shrieked getting about to punch the clown when Harley cleared her throat and cocked the revolver's hammer back.

"I know you." Joker said in shock. In all the years that she had chased the Joker she'd never heard that tone of voice from him. It wasn't his insane laughter nor was it the darker tone he used to scare people. It was almost hollow with shock. "You're-"

"Barbara!" Commissioner James Gordon shouted cutting the Joker off.

"You mean?" Joker started laughing again throwing his head back and holding his belly as he stared at the father cradling his sperm soaked daughter in his arms.

"We had a deal Joker!" James snarled thrusting a finger at the laughing clown.

"Yes we did. You can walk out of here. This. . .this is great! Harley! Batgirl is Gordon's daughter!" The beautiful clown girl was laughing but she was also furiously fingering herself, four fingers jammed into her pussy. "C'mon Harley it's been a good day. Maybe next week we can get Catwoman!" He chuckled as he walked away. Harley was having a little more difficulty walking since she refused to pull her fingers out.

"Daddy. There is something I've been meaning to tell you."

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