Bee's Story, My Story Ch. 11

"Hi everyone, I've missed you. I hope you've missed me too!

I wanted to start by saying thank you for taking it a little easier on me during the wait for this one. I know it was a little longer, but there are 5 dates covered in it. I really am trying to get completely caught up. Hopefully this is worth the wait.

Also, there's a lot of lactation stuff in it, that doesn't seem to be bothering anyone nearly as much as I thought it would though, especially with all the comments I got after the last update mentioning I may have gotten some of you curious if not completely into it. But I just thought I'd warn the silent handful of you who might still be uncomfortable with that. This is also easily my most explicit post to date. I did initially try to keep things more vague but it didn't feel right to me and it made the writing sound more detached, so I just let myself enjoy reliving these moments as I cleaned them up. I feel like most of you would have preferred this way anyway.

I also really wanted to thank you all for the birthday wishes in my profile! I seriously didn't expect that much of a response, I felt so loved. I didn't think anyone would care about a non-update post from me like that. And also thank you to those of you who sent me gifts!!! I was a bit unsure whether I wanted to accept anything despite the numerous people expressing the desire to, but I really do appreciate it, and am surprised at the amount of you who were serious! Thank you so much! If anyone else is ever feeling generous my most recent personal post has the info.

Heads up, this post also exceeded the 40k character limit. So it continues in the comments!!!

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Monday, June 17th 2019

I woke up from the most incredible dream today. So vivid. He was sucking my tits hungrily, and I was giving him so much milk, reveling in the feeling of it being drawn from me, the milk rushing through my nipples, the release of pressure, the sensation of his tongue occasionally brushing my sensitive nubs. He made me cum, there was just no avoiding it, it was too much for me to handle. I woke up soaking and flushed, minutes before my alarm went off.

I was actually kind of disoriented when I woke up from the dream. My nipples were aching in a different way, and I felt extremely rested. Not quite the kind of unsatisfied way I'd feel after a dream like that. And then I opened my phone and checked my notes and immediately remembered it was absolutely NOT a dream. I had straight up offered myself to my brother. I came for him last night. I had his lips on my breasts. I felt myself go hot and red, and felt my stomach doing flips. How the fuck do I talk to him after last night?

By the time I took my shower and got ready, he had already left for his class. Which now meant he would be waiting for me by the time I got home from work. I was going to have to sit at my desk all day, anxious about coming back.

Luckily/unluckily it was a busy day. It went by fast despite having to stay a little later. But then the drive home was excruciating. We needed to talk. There was no avoiding it. I had crossed a line last night... and I pulled him over it with me. We needed to talk about what that was going to mean for us. I was more nervous about this than when I confronted my ex about leaking the things I'd sent him. I was more nervous than when my dad found a totally unopened pregnancy test under my bathroom sink and I had to admit that I was sexually active (I wasn't having unprotected sex, I've actually never had unprotected sex, but I had the test just to be safe). I felt like I hit every single red light possible coming home, just drawing out the inevitable. And yet still, when I made it to the apartment... I sat in my car for a few minutes just feeling my heart beating in my chest. But eventually I did force myself to come inside, only to find that he wasn't even home.

In my nervousness over what I would say to him, I'd failed to notice his car wasn't even there. I texted him to ask where he was and if he was okay, and he said he was fine, but that he'd be home late because he was working at school. I was starting to worry that... maybe last night had been too much, and now he wasn't comfortable being around me. I felt such a weird mix of emotions over the whole thing. I forced myself to eat something and tried to milk a little bit, but because of the anxiety of the day, I was feeling pretty drained and ended up going to bed early.

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Friday, June 21st 2019

We've missed each other all week. I've had late nights, and so has he. But this whole thing has been killing me. I can't delay this any longer, I need to talk to him about Monday.

He's started another group project so I knew he'd potentially be home a little late, but I made sure he'd have to face me when he got home, now that I could stay up as late as I needed to. While before I was just nervous about the conversation, now I was nervous because I hadn't seen him since that night, and I had no idea what he was feeling about me, if he was upset with me or what. His texts sounded normal, but I was actually a little afraid of how he would look at me after how I'd behaved that night. I didn't have to wait long to find out, however. He came home about an hour after I did.

I was sitting in the chair that faces away from the door, still in my clothes from work. I was sitting sideways with my legs over the arm so I could see the door, and when he came in and we locked eyes, I felt like my heart stopped. I couldn't read his face at all. But he closed the door and came closer.

"Hey," he said as he approached, "I've missed you this week!" He smiled, and it made me feel better. Clearly he didn't hate me or think any less of me. In truth he was his usual self. But his smile faltered and I could tell I wasn't being myself.

"Me too." Was all I could say.

"Is.... everything okay? You look kind of pale."

That kind of caught my attention and I felt my face grow hot.

"Well, you DID look kind of pale?" He observed, and it actually got a slight chuckle out of me before I felt the anxiety return. I looked up at him, pleadingly.

"Have you been avoiding me?" I asked as evenly as I could muster.

He looked genuinely confused. "What? No! I- it really has been a busy week. I- why would I be avoiding you?"

"Well, because of... Look, umm... this is really hard, okay? But... about Monday-" I started.

Now it was his turn to go red. He tensed and I wish I could have read his mind.

"-We need to talk about it. Okay?" I said softly while I sat up.

"Yeah..." he admitted as he set down his messenger bag and sat on the couch facing me.

We sat in silence, and I was wringing my hands, trying to figure out how to start. I opened my mouth to talk a few times before changing my approach. And finally the words came.

"I'm sorry for putting you in that situation. I- I shouldn't have done that, and... I just... I don't know. I hope you don't hate me, just-"

"HATE you?" He interjected. "Why would I HATE you for something like that?"

"I-"

"You don't have to apologize for what happened. I wouldn't have gone through with it if I didn't want to."

I paused and contemplated for a second. "I just never want you to feel forced to do something- I don't want you to do something you'd regret- I don't want you to feel coerced-"

"I felt- I FEEL none of that. Seriously. You gave me a choice, remember?"

I thought about it, I know I did, but I feel like the way I presented the options may have felt a little... weighted. "I know, but I was just afraid of you feeling like you DIDN'T have the choice"

"I wanted it just as much as you did." He said. And it pierced the air. I felt my eyes widen. I gripped the arms of the chair a little tighter.

"So... you don't regret... anything? Even though I'm your-"

"Not at all. It was the hottest thing I've ever experienced. And I don't know. I love that it was you. I never thought I'd say that, but it made me feel closer to you?"

"I mean, it's kind of hard not to feel closer to someone after you nurse from them and make them... yeah."

He sat back a little and nodded his head. "Look, do YOU regret what happened?"

I stared at my knees and shook my head. "No... I- I really don't. If it had pushed you away from me, or made you hate me... I would. But really... I couldn't stop myself that night, I don't know what happened. I'm kind of glad it did though. In the moment I wanted nothing else. And I just wanted to be close to you, and for you to enjoy my milk and-

He touched my hand, startling me. "Me too. I'm still here, and I'm not going anywhere. I definitely enjoyed it. Maybe I'm wrong, what with my lack of experience, but it sounded like you enjoyed it too."

I blushed hardcore.

He sat up a little higher. "So wait, did you REALLY- did you cum?"

I nodded my head, embarrassed, and held up two fingers.

"Twice??"

I nodded a little faster.

"Whoa..."

"I told you I was really sensitive... plus I'd never had someone drink from me. It felt a lot better than I'd imagined."

"Yeah but, I didn't think- Seriously that was the hottest thing ever. I can't believe I made my sister cum. TWICE!"

I felt a prickling sensation on my skin when he said that. It felt so... it was thrilling, in a dangerous way. But it reminded me of the reality of all of this. "You understand that what happened has to stay our secret, right?"

He nodded stoically. "I understand. I know this is- that we- I know it stays between us."

I turned my whole body in the chair to face him head on. "If you can't use discretion as far as this is concerned.... I need you to tell me right now."

He looked me in the eye. "I promise. I get it. This is weird, and I never thought I'd be having this conversation with you in a million years. But to me, what happened was just another way of showing how much I love you. And I don't need anyone else to know or understand the way I express that when it's just the two of us."

I smiled weakly. "I love you. This is all new for me too, and I just want you to know that I never want you to feel like you can't say no if something like that were to happen in the future. Understand? I'm still looking out for you, and I still want to take care of you, and I'm always going to be your big sister. That always comes first."

He perked up when I mentioned something in the future. I'm pretty sure he thought that night was a one time lapse in judgment. And maybe it was... but I didn't want to close the door on the possibility of more. Not after how good it felt. Not with how much more I wanted, hoped for.

He nodded. "I understand."

"So are we good? I don't want things to be awkward after... well..."

"We're more than good. I loved every second of that night. I would do it again if I could!" He kind of stopped himself but didn't look like he said anything he didn't mean to say. I felt my nipples come to attention but I felt like we needed to decompress after that conversation and jumping right into something wasn't the way to do it.

"I loved it too... seriously. You were uh... you made me feel really good. And I'm glad you don't seem to mind the milk."

"I actually really love it. It tastes really good. And I'm glad I could make you feel so good while I did that. It makes it so much better."

I nodded and could feel myself reconsidering whether or not I didn't want a repeat tonight. But I decided to stick to my guns. "Do you want to go out and get something to eat?"

"Yeah actually I'm super hungry."

We ended up getting a group going and went out to eat with my friends. I felt a little numb, and maybe wasn't myself while we were with everyone. We kept catching each other's eyes at various points and it was a little awkward. By the end of the night the feeling had mostly subsided and I felt more like myself. When we came home, we played some Crash Team Racing together for a while, until I got tired of getting my ass handed to me. Despite how much I'd played the original as a little girl, I was too used to Mario Kart's mechanics at this point. I was having a hell of a time adjusting. We sat in comfortable silence for a little bit, but eventually I got tired and headed to my room to milk a little and do my bedtime routine. It took me a while to fall asleep. It felt like I'd left a lot unsaid, but it was so hard to organize my thoughts in the moment. It felt like we understood each other though, and I saw that as a success. He didn't hate me. In fact it sounded like the opposite, and that left me feeling warm and reassured enough to finally doze off.

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Saturday, June 29th 2019

The days following that talk were a little awkward. I think we were just unsure of how to navigate each other. How do you continue being siblings and cohabitating after the other person makes you cum on your kitchen counter while drinking your breast milk. I couldn't tell you how many times I caught myself watching his lips and biting my own, aching for that feeling again. I had finger fucked myself to sleep almost every night that week. As the days went on we fell back into our comfort zones and routines. And everything felt right. I was dressing a little conservatively at first, mostly that weekend after the talk, but by now I was back to being comfortable in my more casual clothes. I was wearing my cute panties with Angry Beavers print all over, no bra with a pink tee covered with Slowpoke, knee high pink socks, and my hair up in a messy bun. I was even wearing my glasses today, mostly to fight the fatigue from staring at my computer all through the work week, which had kept me so busy that I hadn't gotten to spend much time with my brother lately.

I was making myself some eggs when I heard him step out of the shower. While I absentmindedly prodded the eggs in the frying pan, I was scrolling through comments on one of my previous posts when suddenly I felt him behind me. Before I could react, he lightly touched my sides with his fingertips, causing me to jump, and almost drop my phone as I scrambled to close the Reddit app.

"Oh my god, you're jumpy today!" He laughed.

I brushed some loose strands of hair out of my face and held my boobs for security. "You dick! I could have burned myself! It's too early for this!"

"Bee, it's like 11. Some people are already drinking." He gave me his smart ass smile and I rolled my eyes, turning to tend to my eggs. "I'm sorry though, you didn't burn yourself right?"

I shook my head, before looking back over my shoulder. "What if I had? I bet you'd feel like a real asshole right now."

"Oh, the biggest. How would I make it up to you?" He asked in a mock concerned tone. I could have slapped him.

I'll admit. My mind went to a few dirty places. You could kiss my boo-boo. You could make me feel something to take my mind off the pain. You could- "You could let me win in CTR."

He scoffed. "Where's the satisfaction in that? How about we do battle mode instead since racing isn't really your forte at the moment."

I made a face, and quietly ate my eggs while he started up the game. I watched him do a little bit of the adventure mode while I finished, getting up to wash my plate and go brush my teeth. When I came back he offered me my controller and we played a few rounds. I ended up winning more than losing, but I think it was more luck than actual skill that helped me there. I vowed to get better at the game though. I said I needed a break and he went back to adventure mode.

Really I just felt a bit of an ache in my breasts and wanted to milk a little bit to avoid getting uncomfortable before my usual time. I went back to my bedroom with the intention of doing it in my bathroom when an idea hit me and sent tingles through me. I came back out and grabbed a small towel and the mixing bowl from the kitchen "the one I'd been using the night he first walked in on me). I set the bowl on the table and sat on the couch next to him, placing the towel in my lap. He glanced at the bowl for a second and then went back to the online race he was in the middle of before doing a quick double take and looking at me just as I was hooking my fingers in the bottom of my shirt.

"Is this okay?" I asked innocently. "I figured you're probably comfortable enough with this that I don't have to seclude myself to express."

He looked a little fried but nodded gently. "Uh sure, go ahead." And he went back to his game, now in 8th place.

I hesitated for a second, undressing this close to him was even more intense than doing it from the kitchen, even if his eyes weren't glued to me. I was also fully aware of what I could be instigating with my next move. If anything that made the decision easier. I pulled the shirt over my head and threw it on the floor, making sure he saw it land. He definitely glanced at it, but snapped back to focusing on the game. He'd worked his way back to 5th.

My breasts needed no coaxing at this point, my nipples were achingly hard, and when I grabbed the bowl and started to knead, the milk came easily. I let out a small, unintentional gasp as the first satisfying tingle of release, before biting my lip, unsure if he'd heard me. Before long the gentle spray of the milk hitting the bowl could be heard slightly amongst the din of the shoulder buttons of the PS4 controller and the hectic soundscape of the race. He was in 2nd place now.

I switched breasts and he glanced over at me, as if to confirm that I was really doing what he thought. He looked back quickly, but not before I caught his eyes widening, his brow shooting up, and his jaw going slack. I acted like I was just casually watching him play while I did this. As he looked back he was flattened by a player boosting into him from behind. He went down to 6th.

He never recovered, I think after he saw me his head just was not in the game. He ended up finishing in 7th, only above the sole AI player in the race. I felt a small victory in being enough to throw him off the game as I continued to massage the milk from my breasts. He backed out of the lobby after the race and I looked over to see him watching with rapt attention, the thin streams coming from my nipples. He swallowed hard and met my eyes.

I worked the milk from me while maintaining deliberate eye contact with him. It was electric. I wanted him to just snap and swat the bowl out of my hand, pin me under him, pull my panties aside, and-- oh fuck. I was getting wet. I slowed what I was doing and cocked an eyebrow at him.

"Did you want to help or something?" I asked casually.

His eyes dropped to my boobs and he nodded his head wordlessly.

"Okay." I said softly. I stopped my hands, and with my finger, collected the bead of milk still threatening to drip from my nipple and brought the finger to my lips to suck it clean. I set the bowl aside on the table, well away from the edge, just in case. I pulled my legs out from under me, bringing my knees up, and turned to face him. I let my knees fall gently apart, and looked at him, feeling my chest heave as my breathing became shallower.

He took the hint and set the controller down on the table, he turned to me, and leaned over, planting his hands on either side of my waist. I felt my heart racing, and leaned back a little bit. He came forward more, I leaned back, until I was against the throw pillow on the couch, laying on my back, and he was on top of me. I looked up at him, he was still on his knees, not letting his hips fall against mine. He had his hands planted on either side of my ribs and he froze there, looking at me intensely. I couldn't keep still. I arched my back a little, pushing my chest up for him, and with my left hand, gently caressed myself, running my fingers over the smooth, round flesh of my left breast, before gathering the mass of it and bringing the nipple to my own lips.