Beetlejuice at CONvergence!

The elevator opened its doors, revealing the lobby of the hotel filled with a mixed melee of sci-fi characters, anime, horror, and everything else under the sun... but with a full heart, I punched the doors closed again and pressed the button to go back to the 14th floor. I couldn't believe BJ had done so much research and tailored the fantasy for me so well in almost no time at all. As much fun as the conference was, I didn't want to be away from him anymore, even if it meant spending the evening in the room watching Shannon Tweed with him.

I walked down the hallway, smiling to myself, when I saw the door to our room was slightly ajar, the housekeeping cart parked nearby. Curious about how BJ was handling the situation with the maid, and whether he would remain visible or just disappear to avoid her, I crept quietly to the door to listen.

"You're so different now... so cold. You never used to be so cold in Martinique," a woman's voice purred. The intimate tone sent blood rushing to my cheeks, like I was overhearing something between lovers.

"Well, you'd know all about being cold, wouldn'tcha? It was your coldness that drove me to this," BJ's voice hissed.

"I was never cold to you, my love... only to those that would keep us apart. My coldness kept you from making a terrible mistake," the woman said.

"You were the only mistake I ever made. You killed the only woman I ever loved... I won't let you do it again. You had your hooks in me once, but you no longer control me. I'm dead and your witch's curse is ended," BJ spat, angrily.

"Nothing is ended, only suspended for a time. We can begin again, my darling... we both know you will be alive again, soon. You loved me once, I know you did. How long do you think you can resist me when the blood flows in your veins once more?" the woman cooed.

I jumped at the sound of glass shattering against the wall. "Anything I once felt for you disappeared the moment I saw you for what you really were. Lies and distrust poisoned any appreciation I might have had for your beauty. Nothing I ever saw in your eyes was real," BJ growled.

"Fine," said the woman, her tone dripping with cold menace, "Squander your paltry remaining years, my love. If you choose to live them without me, then you shall have my pity, but not my mercy. For while you live, everything that loves you will die, so I suggest that you rid yourself of that bit of fluff before you are reborn, because unless you've forgotten, my curse stands for all eternity!" she screamed.

The door was suddenly wrenched open and I just had enough time to duck into the ice machine enclave to avoid being seen by the woman leaving with the cart. Breathless, I waited until she was no longer nearby and then poked my head into the hall again, just in time to see the back of a French maid's skirt disappearing around the corner.

Stunned, I went back to my nook in the enclave and slid down the wall to the floor. My head was spinning with questions. How did that woman even know BJ? It was obvious they had a history together. It sounded like they'd even had a relationship, but how? Was she a ghost? If not, how was she still alive, because BJ had been dead for about 600 years. What curse was she talking about? There was a time I would have just shrugged unimpressed at the threat of a curse, but that was before I found out that ghosts were real. If ghosts were real, maybe curses were real, too?

Determined to find the truth, I screwed up my courage and went back to the room, ready to press BJ until everything came out... but when I opened the door, he was gone. Gone were the dishes from lunch, the wet towels from the bathroom floor, and Shannon Tweed from the TV, and on the crisply made bed was a folded note with my name. With a feeling of dread, I began reading:

Hey Kid,

Something came up. Juno says I'll be reborn soon and she needs me to fill out some paperwork before I go. Looks like I can't do the Tim Burton Monster Mash thing with you tonight. Shannon and I saved up a bottle of BJ juice for you, just in case things take longer than I expect. Should be enough there to keep you going until you won't need it anymore, since I'm gonna be reborn soon anyway. It's in the fridge. A couple tablespoons every six hours should do the trick.

I also wanted to say that I'm sorry. I was only thinking of myself when I roped you into this. Even if it turned out okay in the end, you never really got the chance to choose it. I never got your consent, and consent matters. These last few months together have been the best ones I've ever had, alive or dead, and I've never felt like I deserved them. They were only great because you looked past what an ass I was to pull you into my problems. I'm not going to let my selfishness rule your life anymore. I'm going to let you go... because you deserve to choose what you want your life to be.

Please don't call for me because I'd never have the strength to stay away. Just trust me that this is for the best.

With more love than you know,

BJ

Emptiness overwhelmed me, as I sat on the bed reading the note. His handwriting was strangely elegant and old-fashioned, the ink bleeding out where my tears had begun to fall onto the page. It seemed so strange that I'd never seen his handwriting before... and now, I knew that I would never see it again.

He had left to protect me, framing it as an apologetic gesture for not getting my consent, not that he had bothered to get my thoughts or consent about leaving. Was he really cursed that while he lived, everything that loved him would die? Did he believe in it so completely that he couldn't risk even seeing me again, or asking me what I wanted? What was I supposed to do with my life, now that all my choices seemed like curses?

I pulled off my red wig and the rest of the Doctor Crusher costume and curled up under the covers, hoping against hope that I would awaken to find that it was all a bad dream.

Hours later, I opened my eyes to a sense of unreality that penetrated me to my bones. I walked around the room, disconnected from everything around me, acting without volition or thought. It wouldn't have surprised me if I could pass through the walls. I drifted over to my suitcases and put on my final costume and fitted on my last wig. I had intended to make my skin paler and to shade dark circles around my eyes with makeup, but after looking at my reflection in the mirror, I saw that it was unnecessary. I was the very image of Josette DuPres.

I took out the costume that BJ was going to wear when he went to the Tim Burton Monster Mash with me. I spread it carefully out on the bed and lay down next to it, putting my hand where his would have been if he had been wearing it. It didn't ease my pain. Nothing would ease my pain anymore because nothing could touch it... because I no longer had substance.

Rising from the bed, I left the room and glided back to the elevator, summoning it with my ghostly finger. If BJ and I were doomed always to be separated by the veil of death, I knew what I needed to do, but I would need help to do it. The elevator brought me to the first floor where I glided through the vibrant crowd of Jack Skellingtons, Alma Peregrines, Sweeny Todds and Red Queens until my eyes fell upon a buxom woman in the short, fluffed black and white dress of a French maid. She turned to face me with a knowing smile on her face and I put my hand on her arm, allowing her to lead me back to the elevator where she hummed cheerfully as she placed her key card on a panel and then pressed the button to take us to the restricted-access roof of the building.

Strangely, I felt no particular enmity toward the woman. We shared an eternal love of the same man, and so she was more of a sister to me than anything else. Her claim to him preceded mine, and so my claim must fail. These were the rules of the Soon to Be Recently Deceased. I only wished I could have seen him once more.

When the elevator doors opened, my final wish was granted. There, stood my beloved in the elegant garb of Barnabas Collins, the passion in his face like a deadly storm. He had come to stop me from doing what I must, believing in vain that happiness could be borrowed from a future without hope.

The furious wind whipped my hair wildly around me when I stepped out onto the roof. His black hair remained unmoving, plastered against his pale face by the torrential rain. He held out his hand to me, his fingers unnaturally long and knobby, his nails clawlike, yet perfectly manicured. "Josette!" he cried, as I desperately tried to evade him and run to the edge of the roof to embrace my fate. I darted around him, but tripped over a bit of unsecured cable and fell, tearing my frock. I scrambled up again, sobbing and overwrought. I was but a few feet from my salvation when he caught me up in his arms, pressing his lips to mine. "You cannot do this! This profane act is not the answer! A witch has deceived you with treachery! Do not leave me to wander this cold world alone with nothing but the dark shadows of my soul for company!"

Knowing my love for him would doom us both, I struggled desperately against him as he pressed his lips to my throat, eventually going limp in his arms, appearing to accept my unholy fate. When he opened his mouth to bestow upon me his immortal kiss, I prepared to tear away from him and throw myself off the roof with a final frantic burst of energy, but we were most oddly interrupted by the sound of crunching.

"Man, they just don't write melodrama like they used to..." said a short older woman dressed as Lady Olenna, where the devious French maid had once stood. She took another bite of toast and chewed it thoughtfully as she leaned on a gnarled staff. "Ever since the 90's it's been all about the snappy banter... never mind if the world's ending, we gotta get those one-liners in. Well, don't let me interrupt. I just wanted to see if you two jackasses would really go through with it," she said, dryly. The night's sky was suddenly clear and filled with stars, the wind no longer whipping my hair and BJ's cape around dramatically.

"Juno?" I said, bewildered. The woman threw the crust of her toast aside and lit a cigarette before hobbling over to where we were.

BJ blinked, appearing to give himself a mental shake, then helped me back to my feet where I wobbled dizzily, having gotten a glimpse of the plunge I'd intended to take to the street to keep myself from living forever as a vampire. "Uh hey Boss, I toldja I had it all handled. See?" he said, displaying me to Juno as if I was evidence of him being in control of everything.

Juno raised an eyebrow and took another drag off her cigarette. "What is the first rule of bringing costumes to life?" she asked him, gripping her staff threateningly.

BJ mumbled several unintelligible things about Shannon Tweed before she rapped him in the forehead with her stick. "ALWAYS KNOW THE BACKSTORY!" she yelled. "How much trouble is it to check out a couple fansites before deciding to make the costumes turn you into the real character? That way, you might just find out if she's going to go jumping off something because she's a suicidal tragic heroine! Not to mention putting on a costume you'd magic-ed up for yourself, as well, you moron! Did you even bother to look at what the costumes were, or did you just jerk a bunch of magic spooge over her goddamn suitcases and call it done?"

Juno yelled at Beetlejuice for a good while, so I sat back down on the roof, cross-legged in my torn dress, glad to feel like a normal person again. As it turned out, BJ's stunt with the costumes was a big violation against some magical restriction the dead had, so he would need to stay a ghost for another year instead of being reborn within a couple days. I didn't mind so much because it was kinda fun to have a magic husband, but BJ was pretty pissed.

"Well, you'd think you'd want to get rid of me sooner, then! Why let me keep all this magic if I'm such a jackass about using it? What's with the raisin lady getup anyway? I liked you better as the French maid," BJ griped, walking toward the door back to the elevator after helping me back up again.

Knowing what was coming, I bit my lips to keep from laughing as Juno smiled slyly, took another another drag of her cigarette before reaching up and patting him on the cheek, "I wanted you to know it was me..."

Beetlejuice at CON: Where Science Fiction and Reality Meet