Belinda Rose

Back to the evening of that discovery

It was near dawn when I had thought this through. What evidence did I really have?

One photograph taken six years ago or there about; that is the time she was going for council

This photo turns up on the net after she is sworn into parliament

My suspicion fell on Adrian Wilson. If she has moved on to greener pastures in Parliament may be he feels he has been passed over and has posted this to destroy her; maybe.

Is there anyone else? Don't know.

There was opportunity when she first joined that criminal reform crowd. She Knew Adrian then. Shit! Were the boys mine? Adrian looks a lot like me but he is very short, close to Rose's size. The boys were dark haired looking more like me than Rose but both were tall, in fact taller than me. Somehow I doubt he's the father, but I will have to get the DNA done.

Was there any other hanky-panky on the way; who knows? Maybe that will turn up on the net.

Has she embarked on a new affair? Based on evidence from the past, that is, one naked photo, I would say anything is possible. I can no longer trust anything that Rose has told me about the past and why should I now.

Obviously she has not been as determined for her marriage as whatever other agenda she has. Thinking about her rhetoric on the campaign I would say it is her law and order objectives. This goes back to her trauma and she is on a mission and to quote her debate so long ago the 'ends were justifying the means' even if our marriage is going to be collateral damage. It was my lucid light bulb moment. My anger returned.

Ok, I decided I will not approach her first with the photograph and ask her to explain. I decided that I will have to talk to Adrian's wife first. I had met her, a couple of times on the campaign trail. She was not usually involved and a bit stand offish. I wonder why?

If he has had affairs and he seems the sort, she may know about them and have considered divorce. I need the dirt. Then I will talk to the boys and make a decision about our future. This career of Rose, I thought, was not going to lead to a sustainable marriage; and there is one photograph that means reconciliation is already too late.

Alternatively, do I want to kill Rose's career to try and recover the marriage? Affairs do not always kill careers and might, in fact enhance it.

I decided I don't want revenge on her. I did not want some media circus that would affect everyone negatively. I just wanted out. Just slide on out under the radar seemed the best option but to satisfy myself I needed an explanation that wasn't bullshit. Although I had my boys, I wanted to believe I had not wasted all those years.

The boys would follow me I am sure. Her political career would not want too much controversy. The boys did not like politics and seemed to have ceased to have anything in common with their mother. She attended birthdays and Christmas and so on but I bought the presents; even the one for me from Rose for my last birthday. Rose never asked about their girlfriends. I don't know why. It was me that pumped them for info. It was me that made their girlfriends breakfast when they appeared unexpectedly out of the boys bedrooms in the morning.

In the finish I got no sleep that night.

I rung into the department in the morning; I had no lectures or important meetings for once so I decided I would immediately start what I needed to do. I first of all gained Adrian's home number. I knew he would not be there but his wife would hopefully be in because she did not work

Luckily she was in. I was very careful initially. I asked her if we could meet for lunch as I needed to discuss with her some important outcomes of the election campaign. She must have guessed. She did not say anything but when she turned up for lunch she came prepared.

I chose an upmarket restaurant offering to pay. I brought my leather briefcase and I had a copy of the photograph.

I arrived early and when she arrived she waved at the maître d' and came straight to my table. I ordered wine and had a bottle of Malbec delivered to the table which was poured into our glasses.

We looked at each other in silence for a few seconds, clicked glasses, and sipped the wine then Beth, as she introduced herself, asked the inevitable question. She was straight to the point. "So what did you wish to speak to me about? Do you think my husband is having an affair with your wife?"

"I don't know but there is a story there somewhere."

"Well the answer anyway is that he is not. She dumped him but they had an affair for a long time; I don't know when it started. She was not the only one for my Adrian."

"Was anyone else involved?"

"I don't know. It is possible. You know she has taken up with a cabinet minister."

"Oh shit."

"Oh shit indeed."

"One thing that is eating me up; are my boys mine?"

"Heaven forbid. Anything is possible I suppose but looking at them I would say yours."

I pulled out an A4 copy of Rose in the buff.

"Do you know anything about this?"

"Beth nearly dropped her glass spilling it on to the table. A waiter rushed across and hurriedly soaked up the red wine. Fortunately nothing spilled on our clothes. Beth recovered herself,

"What has he done now? What has the idiot done? When was this taken?"

"About the time Rose was running for Council."

"I bet Adrian took it. He fancies himself as a bit of a photographer, you know. Where did you get it?"

"It was posted on the net."

"No!" Beth almost screamed. "This is out there. You know your wife is going to be toast but I can tell you now worst things are to come."

"Like what?"

"Before I tell you must realise Rose dumped Adrian. Adrian was in love with Rose. It was he who built her up, convinced her to run for council and Parliament. She would never have done it without Adrian. When she took up with the cabinet minister Adrian went into a screaming fit; I mean, I knew any way but he rammed his love for her down my throat and said he was going to get her back. He was certainly in mind for revenge and this looks like a revenge posting to me. But he must know that when this gets about he will be implicated; he is destroying himself as well as her."

"What's he doing now?"

"Well, he is strangely normal."

"I recognise Rose because I know how to, but maybe Adrian thinks people will not and he is just getting satisfaction of it being there; something to hold over her."

"Plausible. He must have other compromising images. Have you done a search?"

"A bit of a search but I haven't turned up a clue."

"Well I can tell you now I am getting out. There is more to it. There has been a misappropriation of campaign funds. I can't say whether your wife had a hand in it but when it blows up, mud sticks. If this gets out as well there will be hell to pay. So how do you want to play it? I take it you will go for divorce."

"My thinking was to just slip out without any fuss. Rose believes in what she is doing and she has apparently sacrificed her family for it. It does not seem like her to get directly involved with misappropriation of funds but she may know something about it. Thing is, if this explodes we are all effected negatively. There will be media frenzy. I suppose if there is evidence of this and it can be confined, all the better, reducing the collateral damage."

"I'm surprised you don't hate her."

"It has been a long time leading to this, I have had flashes of anger but I suppose I have adjusted to it. Maybe when the reality sinks in my emotions might change."

"Listen I may not be taking action tomorrow. The serious fraud squad has been notified, I believe, but their investigation has only just started. I just happen to know this, I won't say how, but my husband does not. They will take a while. The investigation will at some time become public knowledge so I guess you will have to make your mind up to how you want to swing this promptly."

"Well my career might be on the line as well."

"Yes I understand, you're a professor aren't you?"

"At the moment I am Dean, President of the Society among my responsibilities."

"Oh dear! Do you want some time to think about it?"

"Can you give me a couple of weeks? I don't see Rose until this weekend. I will take it up then. I will need to get a lawyer to advise me on to my options and work through our financial situation. Then of cause there are my boys."

"I can live with that but keep me in touch along the way. Maybe we can lunch on Friday and catch up on progress."

And that's how I left it.

The next event could not have been foreseen. It changed everything as far as I was concerned.

My anger was settling in once again. I spoke with the lawyer and lawyers do like to move things along so I had put the divorce in train.

It was the following Thursday and on that day I had a visit from one of my female students. She was one that I had only taken a glancing notice of. As Dean I saw a lot of the students but this was early in the year and I had not recalled her in my office before. My secretary ushered her in.

I gesture to her to the chair. I took off my reading glasses. My first thought was that she looked remarkably like Rose when I first went out with her so many years ago. And I said so right off, remaking how much she looked like my wife when she was younger. I was not expecting the reply.

"There is a good reason for that. Her name is Belinda Rose Shannon isn't it. "

I looked at her curiously. "What do you mean?"

"I believe she is my mother."

I stared at her. She was a mature student in her twenties. She was older than my sons, I thought. It plausible but I knew nothing about the possibility

"You haven't approached her yet?"

"Not yet, I thought it might be a shock. It was kind of a closed adoption. I don't think she wanted to know me. It has been very hard to track you both down."

"It's a shock for me."

"Oh I'm sorry."

"Don't be; I'm fascinated. Listen, you would have been born long before she and I were married. How did you find me?"

"Belinda and you were on my birth certificate."

That floored me. "What the fuck, I had no idea she ever had a baby. We knew each other briefly but only met up after a gap of a number of years."

"And Belinda never told you?"

I nodded. "You called her Belinda. Do you know who she is?"

"Uh no, I don't know much at all. I was focussed on you."

"She is a Member of Parliament."

"Oh shit. She is not going to want to know me then."

"It gets worse. There is a huge controversy involving her brewing...Golly, I'm sorry, can you be discrete about this?"

"Of course, I don't want to jeopardise any chance of getting to know you two."

"I've got to think about it. You might have to do with just me for the time being. You better tell me all about yourself."

Her manner was matter of fact. I don't know whether she was thinking we would fall into each other's arms or not but as the conversation carried on my feelings at least started to warm, softening my initial shock.

Apparently she had literally enrolled in a degree course that I oversaw as part of her quest. She could have done this degree in Auckland, her home town, but she elected to come here to reach her mother through me. Part of her issues was the loss of her adoptive parents through an accident. She felt alone and set out on a mission to find her biological parents.

"Ok, it seems pretty certain that I am your father but will you agree to have a DNA test. It will settle any doubt." She agreed. I was thinking I could have the boys done at the same time.

"Look I am really sorry, this is really stupid but I don't know your name."

"It's Georgina."

"That's a lovely name Georgina. I couldn't have named you better if I had named you myself. What do you like to be called for short?"

"Georgie."

Well Georgie, would you like to start with a hug and we will move on from there.

We did that, but then came the hard yards.

"Do you think my Mum would want to see me?"

"Regretfully I can't say for sure. You know she is an MP. You need to be discrete about this as this controversy is about to break and Rose will be caught up in it. It's going to be complicated. I would suggest we meet regularly while this situation works out and then we can meet your mother when she is in a good frame of mind."

I then cancelled my other appointments for that afternoon and we went for a stroll and a coffee. She told me about her life and I told her about ours, even our early liaison but I stopped short of the affair and the impending divorce.

We parted arranging to meet later. Rose would be in on Friday pm but I did not think that would be a good time to tell her. I had to talk with the boys. They knew virtually nothing about a possible divorce and this had really queered the pitch. I got Georgie's contact details and arranged to meet her for dinner Monday.

The immediate effect was to dissipate my anger. Georgie was a total distraction. Georgie's loss of her adoptive parents had been awful for her. She was desperate in her search for something stable in her life. It seemed she was stepping from one mess to another. Georgie raised paternal feelings in me. I really wanted to help her. Suddenly there was a need bring Rose back into the fold for Georgie's sake.

It also dawned on me that having Georgie at that young age must have been difficult for Rose. I remembered her remark about me being a bloody great Iceberg. The comment now seems to make sense. She probably thought her life had crashed and sunk.

That evening I rounded up the boys. It was a lot to take in. They had guessed for a while of what their Mum had been up to so were remarkably stoic about the possibility of divorce. When it came to Georgie however they were excited. Georgie had given me a photograph to show around and they were positively drooling over her. It's a pity she is our sister, Alex put it.

I then put it to them about what we were to do. I said to them that Mum's career could be destroyed. One option is that she has to resign, she would be devastated; maybe learn her lesson. Maybe the appearance of our daughter might be a game changer and bring us together. It might not be easy but what do they think?

"Well she would have to stop her drinking as she is already an alcoholic." Alex was to the point.

"If her career is in tatters and she has the threat of divorce over her she may admit she has a problem and we can get her some help."

The boys just shrugged; "You're the boss." I realised then that they had ceased caring about Rose. They had ceased to have a model for a normal family.

I had another sleepless night. I resolved that I had to confront her with the whole deal there was no way out. I will tell Beth Friday of my plan. I would put it to Rose Saturday morning. I needed back up. I would ask Gina to come down, it being urgent. I would however keep Georgie out of it until we had reached some kind of conclusion.

I rang Gina in the morning, She knew nothing of what Rose had done and was actually hurt and felt that Rose had done this to her as much as me. She agreed to be there Saturday morning. I paid for hotel accommodation and she would be on her way later that day.

I had lunch with Beth. She was not happy about what I was going to do but realised I probably had no choice. We discussed some eventualities if things got out of control. She wanted me to wait but I just could not. It wasn't in me to act innocent as strung out as I was. I had to get it over with.

I had told neither Beth nor Gina about Georgie.

I picked up Rose from the airport. She seemed surprised but happy to see me. Everything was fine and dandy in Wellington it seemed. She asked me if I had any plans for the weekend. I said there were a few things to sort out and I needed to have a meeting with her Saturday morning. She started on about having to go into the electoral office and I said, "No this is very important. Gina will be arriving."

"Ooo this sounds ominous", She said in a semi- joking sort of away.

I said, "It is quite serious but unfortunately I am not at liberty to say anything until Gina is here."

"Has something happened to Craig?"

"Look, no, no, no, I'm sorry can we just wait until they are here."

"The tension was thick that night, the boys headed for the hills. They just did not want to be around. Fortunately Rose did not take that as a sign as she was used to their coming and goings.

I noted the alcohol on her breath when Rose arrived. Immediately arriving home she was into the gin bottle and was snoring by time I got to bed. I had another sleepless night but Rose did not seem to notice.

Gina turned up with Craig early about eight. They hadn't had breakfast so I made them an omelette. We were all sitting around having a pot of tea when Rose came down sleepily in her floral house coat. She wanted coffee so I ran the expresso and organised that.

It came time to speak. We had just been discussing pleasantries up until then. Rose didn't seem to notice how nervous Gina was so she was completely unwitting at what was coming next.

I started, "Rose, there are a few things I am going to say to you. This is going to be a shock but I will not speak for long and you need to hear me out."

Rose was looking at me with a totally querulous look on her face.

"These are serious things we are going to have to sort through. One, it is widely known you are having an affair with the Minister of Finance"

Rose began wildly looking around but couldn't speak.

"Ok that could probably be kept discrete but unfortunately I have been advised that the serious fraud office is currently investigating your campaign manager, there is a high risk you will be implicated."

At this stage Rose had slumped and was staring up at me in a kind of trance.

"Now I do know that you and your campaign manager have been lovers for some time. At least he loved you I can't speak for you. Unfortunately he seems to believe you dumped him and appears to be seeking some kind of revenge." With that I pulled out the picture of Rose naked. "Do you have any idea how this got on to the internet. It seems to have been taken about when you were elected to council."

The site of the image caused Rose to immediately projectile vomit followed by dry retching there was no control. She soiled her dressing gown then collapsed onto the ground curling up in her own vomit.

Gina was crying. "What have you done Paul? Wasn't there better way than this?"

"No Gina, the axe is about to fall. It is better that she knows the consequences now and to know the absolute gravity of the situation she has been led into. She needs to know she has to talk to the serious fraud office. We have to get her out of harm's way as soon as possible. Maybe then we can help her."

Craig was bending over Rose who was not moving and mumbling incoherently. "I think we better get her to hospital."

Emergency services eventually arrived and she was admitted to hospital and given sedation. Gina, Craig, I and eventually the boys took turns to sit with her.

I didn't know how this was going to play out but I felt I was still in love with her. The hope of a new family life had been rekindled with the arrival of Georgie.

Yes, what had happened was a major betrayal of the boys and me; but she believed she was seeking the greater good driven by the trauma of the home invasion. I realised this was probably going to be her third and greatest trauma. Her first was the pregnancy and the taking of her baby. It must have been appalling for a girl not out of her teens.

Now her passion had been used by those ratbags around her; I didn't want to be another rat failing her.

There was the possibility that this latest trauma would finish her. For the sake of her boys and her newly found daughter I did not want to block a path to some kind of new happiness for her. We needed a path out of this.