All Comments on 'Betrayed for Love'

Good story!

4

Dont know if I could forgive that. They all did break her heart and left her to her own devices. Thats cruel on so many levels.

Cunt shit.

Wow, William was certifiable.

Heartbreaking.

Incredibly stupid story, the kind that kills your braincells for trying to read it

that was a sad tale

Sorry. Nothing about this story makes any sense to me. If you say that it is a true story, I suppose you must be believed, but there must be additional details that would give the story some believability.

Very well written. A couple of word level gaffs indicate that you relied over much on computer grammar checking and did no slow year your final product. The story is just so sad it wasn't entertaining, and the idea that it was based on a true story made it even worse. Nevertheless, your enormous collection of followers tell me that you are new star on the horizon. Keep up the good work.

Pure garbage. Proof reading always help you and others to understand what you are writing. You jump around so much my interest was lost in the first page.

Beautiful

5/5

So sad.

A Tale of True love is so refreshing

I give this story 3 stars because it was written very well. I would have loved to have given it a higher score except for the reactions of the people involved. However I like the concept of the story.

Sincerely,

Payenbrant

Oh, i believe it and not just because i recognize that the males of our species daftly confuse self sacrifice with pride. I encountered a similar situation once though not executed as crudely as William here. I had a patient for a while that was traumatized badly because her husband thought it a good idea to "release his wife" and die alone... the dumb shit. He didn't pretend to cheat and throw it in his wife's face. He simply said that he had found someone else and walked out. Like any woman, my patient proceeded to channel her inner hell demon; destroyed his possessions, cursed him and his family etc. No one told her he died until a couple years later when she encountered an old acquaintance from college. He had tried to contact the husband through the parents and found out. When he saw my patient he mentioned how sad it was. Events happened from there and it wasn't pretty. She went off on her former inlaws which I completely understood. The mother apologized for her family. She knew it was wrong and deeply hurtful to someone they viewed as family but it was her son. I don't think that was particularly helpful because my patient commented that the actions proved she wasn't actually viewed as family (I tend to agree). Horrible situation that left a barely 30 year old completely unable to build relationships due to lack of trust.

I haven't seen her in years but

a well written tear jerker. it kinda feels wrong for this one to be in the cesspool of the LW category.

Nice set up and ending. Well told.

Wow hate to say it but i think it was a rather selfish and dick move no matter what the intentions behind it were. For Better or for Worse are not just words bandied about in a nuptials ceremony for nothing. So to spare Renay the hurt of watching William die he decided without telling her to betray and break her heart in a most vicious way with a faux adultery!!!

What an evil selfish think to do. I have known people who committed suicide for that sort of betrayal. Another who never dated again and spent their lives alone. William denied her the chance to love him and show that love by walking through that valley beside him as far as she could go, up to that last mile that he had to walk alone. That was not self sacrifice but selfishness.

Stupid story.

Nice story and well-written. Have to say, however, he had no right to take that decision out of her hands.

I fought hard wether to give 4 or 5 stars. In the end it was a 5* story for me. William took an unusual and entirely selfless approach for Renay's happiness. I'd like to read more of this.

I gave it a 4. If Renay not found out the truth until after William died preventing the reconciliation I would have scored higher.

A hint for odiouser. 5 stories with 120 followers and low scores doesn't make one an up and coming author.

True story? I don't think so. What a convoluted mess. If you'd have stayed on one path it may have made a bit of sense, but you chased down to many rabbit trails to keep my interest.

Wow - that was great! It felt good to cry at the end. If it is indeed close to a real life story, my prayers for the wife and her new family. She'll struggle to live with the memory of her ex!

well u need an editor but damn man u had my mind going this way and that way. shit im still playing tennis with it in my head. very thought provoking ty for the read

I know the feeling only too well.

A sorry pathetic tale! Not "sad" but pathetic. Deserved a "1" star but did give it a "2." Renay should of been given the treatment she deserved (not "good" but "payback" for her actions to William's family. They should NEVER forgive her for her actions. And for Travis to marry her after finding the kind of woman she is...right after Hell freezes over!

Sorry, not buying that the hurt of his "cheating" was better than the hurt of watching him die, which she ended up with anyway, even if she WAS spared the progression of the disease.

\

Since he was relatively healthy at the start, better would have them give his mother another grandbaby, then an amicable divorce, freeing her to find a new love, without the burden of recovering from his cheating.

Sad and poignant story.

Would have scored it higher but, it was difficult to read due to a number of proofreading and editing errors. Too many incorrect words used that repeatedly disrupted the flow of the story

I'm unsure whether there are any people like Will. Also, he put her through a world of hurt. D

"For those who may think this is too unrealistic and far-fetched"- put me in this group. Hurting her the way he did, silencing the whole family, causing her SO much pain with absolutely NO explanation- that is beyond cruel. She was almost to the point of suicide, and THEN how would he and her family felt about his 'solution'. Nope, cannot, and will not believe it. But, for a gripping and suspenseful story, it almost can't be beat.

Travis is a tough man. How can he be in that marriage when she really loves husband #1 and now for certain in her eyes (not mine) he is a saint? I mean he was a revenge rebound guy at the start but now, raise a kid named after hubby #1 and always be lower in the rank? Wow...

William was a piece of shit. He should have talked to his wife and let her know he was dying. Doesn't matter if she would have been "years in arrears" getting started on that baby or not, doing things the way he did was just selfish in his part and caused the woman he lived undue pain.

Based on a true story? Just goes to show that people truly suck.

I enjoyed your writing ability and quality. Many thanks. The actual story... well, I would have told the family, including my former BFF that they were all arseholes for deciding for me, manipulating me, about my husband, the person I loved at the time. I might even, in his hospice room, tell my former husband he was a complete prick for withholding the truth of the situation and that no, I didn't forgive him. He deliberately caused two years of mental anguish, just to satisfy his selfish interests. That I was a big girl and this this major truth should never have been kept from me. That I never want to see any of his tratorous, lying family again. That they never included ME as a family member if they could do this to me. Fuck them all.

Absolutely heart wrenching , beautifully written and passionately expressed , but extremely heart wrenching ! I tried to remain dry eyed but it was impossible even though I’d figured out early on page 2 , but I still wept ! You deliver drama with a screaming capital D ! And I’m sorry for the loss of your friend , but you certainly paid homage to their memory ! I normally don’t like tear jerkers , and I still don’t , but I’m very glad I read this one ! 5 stars ! Your name should be in a star on Hollywood’s walk of fame in front of grohmans Chinese Theater

Loved it, a beautiful story, a real tear-jerker. It was well thought out and executed, yes I can believe it was based on a true story. As it has been said I'm not sure it should have been in LW, perhaps romance would have been better but I enjoyed reading it Thank you 5/5

Sorry, but his betrayal was not for love. He was incredibly selfish and denied his wife the opportunity to face the end of his life together. To spend those last precious years, days, minutes together would be everything to the surviving spouse. His family were fools to go along with his cruelty. Renay was devastated and bitter as result of William’s actions. Travis was the only likable character and he will have his hands full as Renay grieves for her lost love.

I thought it was pretty well written and flowed quickly.

Shallow people.

Dumb, and if this really has some basis in reality they also were dumb. To make the love of your life hate you so that she can potentially have a child with someone else is stupid and cruel. She could have frozen his sperm, she could have frozen her eggs, she could have fucking adopted. Just because something is logical doesn't make it right.

That wasn't her husbands decision to make. And rather than let her make her own decision and living out the rest of his life to it's fullest with someone that loves him he inflicted the worst paint imaginable. Arguably the emotional pain he inflicted was worse than that of his death.

What an unbelievable piece of crap. He deprived the woman who loved him that much the last three years of their life together and kept the secret from her. And then on his death bed offers her the lamest, vainest explanation.

As I usually do, I read the other readers' comments while gathering my feelings. It seems that some missed the story and ranted about BS. One thing I have come to realize in my advancing years is, that life doesn't always make sense. While I have not encountered this exact situation, I have been aware of something similar happening. Some people feel that they are making the ultimate sacrifice to someone that they love more than life itself. Yes, I agree that it may be misguided without the consideration of the ones that loved them the most. People, sometimes life is just a bitch, suck it up and face reality. To BlueGee, well written and hopefully it will strike a chord with someone and they may understand something in their life.

Husband was stupidly even though unintentionally, evil

Great tale but the character’s reactions felt … stilted.

gave it a 3 only because William was selfish and a fool not to connect with his wife and tell her what was going on. No excuses here

What a tearjerker. Well done

What a sad story.

William was neglected by his workaholic wife, got cancer, and died.

Life really took a shit on that poor bastard.

It speaks volumes that when Renay stumbled into his faked affair, she was late home as usual, and was panicking about making it up to him... having also not had sex with her husband for weeks.

Outstanding, well written story of love and emotional turmoil that is a solid 5 Star effort IMHO.

Thanks

The ultimate example of being cruel to be kind

This story shows a very selfish and self-centered dying husband. He betrayed his wife so HE wouldn't have to see her morn for him. And his family betrayed her too. Marriage is for better or for worse, in sickness and in health and she walked away with a send of incredible betrayal, loss and distrust rather than great sadness and loss.

The husband and his family were wrong to treat her this way, and wrong to support this. I would not have forgiven his family.

This is a beautifully written story, and I absolutely hate it. I understand William’s motivations, but he made decisions for Renay that he had no right to make, put her through month after month of emotional agony that was probably MORE painful to her than his being honest with her about his terminal diagnosis would have been. That’s an utterly horrible, vile thing do to someone one claims to love. And his family are just as culpable, just as vile, for going along with it.

I’m not going to give this story a star rating. On a technical level it’s nearly flawless, and as an example of good storytelling it deserves a far higher rating than my emotional response to the story will allow me to give it. My rating it at this point would be totally unfair to to the author, so I’m not going to do it. Maybe in a few weeks when my emotions have cooled I can revisit the idea of a rating.

OK writing I guess but probably a non erotic topic. Wife did nothing wrong but honestly if it were me I would be so pissed that he felt he had the right to determine how I should face his death. Same with the family that I would disown. Vows are in sickness and health till death do us part. Not until I get cancer and feel I need to act like some hero and "let you go".

The writing is decent, but the premise of the story is ridiculous. You've gotta start with a believable premise, kids. Otherwise, the story lacks the universality necessary for others to relate to it.

Well done. And for me at least, anger was easier to get over than grief. My first wife was killed when we were in our 20's.

It took a LOT longer to get past that than it did getting over the next woman I fell in love with walking away from me. She didn't cheat as such, but her announcement that she had to leave -- but that it was nothing I'd one --made me angry and despise her. That anger fueled my plans to start living again much faster than I had after becoming a widower.

4 stars and yes, this story is in the wrong category.

I recently lost my closest brother-in-law to cancer and I am so thankful we were able to spend a week visiting with him in the palliative care unit 2 weeks before he died. We were both the same size over 6 feet and 200 pounds - when we visited, he weighed less than 100 pounds and was a skeletal shadow on the edge of death. It was heartbreaking and yes, I would do almost the same thing as this guy in the story. I would not want my family to watch me die slowly for over a year - NO WAY.

Gave you 5 stars for a well written story. William was dumb as a rock and cruel to do what he did even if he thought he was doing it for her. And he could have given her that baby. But people sometimes only see one avenue.

Pretty neat trick to pull off the supposed sex scene. They'd have had to have spray bottles of water to fake the sweat. Grace would have found them. Plus a fresh fucked vagina would have to been hard to fake as well. Perhaps a dildo, again none mentioned. Would have been easier to just be caught cuddling as she walked in. Maybe not as erotic, but more realistic considering the actual events.

I guess I can't argue against reality, such as it is. That said, the cruelty in how William destroyed his marriage was devoid of love. In fact, it is that level of self-centeredness that I equate what he did along the same lines as committing suicide. Only in this case, suicide wouldn't have caused the mental health problems to his wife that his approach did... 4*

Beautiful story. Good writing and great characters. Thanks.

Well written. Your story tugged at the well spring of my heart.

The husband is some odd variant of an entitled, malignant narcissist. The world is fortunate he died young and without reproducing. The wife's desire to see him on his deathbed would only make sense if she took the opportunity to piss on his face as he lay struggling to breathe. The author is mistaken if he/she believes the husband truly had love for his emotionally abused wife, who he condescendingly felt deserved something other than truth and respect.

William was an asshole. He loved her so much that he decided to put her through hell. he lived for a long time after his vicious stunt. He didn't deserve her continuing feeling for him. His family did not deserve her forgiveness. Renay should have spit in his face, taken Travis' hand and walked away.

That was a betrayal worse than cheating, what a vile personality her husband and so called friends turned out to have

It was a sad tale.

But nevertheless, it was a bittersweet love story.

Nice work BlueGee.

Well witten narrative.

Outstanding

5 Stars, This one hit home. I watched 3 important people in my life die from this dreaded disease. First my Father in law, a great man. His was in the Pancreas. Next was my Mother in law, Hers was Ovarian cancer. She was the greatest lady to ever walk this earth. Not many men will say that about their Mother in law. Last was my wife of 35 years, she had lung cancer. Trust me I understand the motive of the dying Husband. My wife and I moved a thousand miles away from our daughters because she didn't want them to see her go down hill. They understood. Since this is based on a true story I cannot condemn any of the characters in this story or the writer. I will condemn the medical industry for the devastation they put patients and families through. Cancer is a cash cow for the medical industry, with out Cancer the medical industry would go bankrupt.

A solid 5 star, because I can't give more. And yes a very cruel thing to do, to take away what any carring spouse would have done, to care with all the love you have, how painfull it is. Yes it will alwways hurt, but you can remember with love and foundness. Now not so much.

I knew it! I knew it! Didn't QuickMagazine say in comments on "Lament" that this new author would be "someone worth monitoring closely"? This is as different from "Lament" as both were from "The Race." Though it does share with "Lament" the elements of tragedy. Based as it was on actual events, a heartfelt 5.

Wife is more forgiving than I would be. Thanks for writing

The writing was top notch! 5 Stars.

Now as a general rule I don't like deaths is a stories, except we justified (protecting yourself or others).

I'll remember this story for it's negative impact, and still give it 5 stars.

Please no follow on stories like "February sucks"...

Mostly this story made me very angry. William acted in the most selfishly destructive way possible, tossing aside not only his wife’s right to share his illness with him, as a wife should, but also in contriving the most hurtful and disgusting exit he could heap upon her. He left her tortured by anger, intense hurt, and no closure by running away like a coward. the story is very well written but like the remarks by Lord_Gro below, I can’t bring myself to rate this based on the literary merits. Easy to get emotionally involved in the story but difficult to find how the author thought William’s actions were in any way an act of love, they were an act of unadulterated cruelty.

There are a lot of authors in LW who you put to absolute shame with your willingness to attempt new angles, explore potentially-unpopular dramatic angles, and tell human stories. Some of them are very houseproud of how tough they perceive themselves to be. Their desperate grip on the safety of repetition and comfortable ground betrays them.

Your characters often make choices that are outside the bounds of rational thinking or even emotional bonds, but whenever they do it is in service of a story and not a fantasy ego trip. Well done.

It would be very easy to side with Renay against William. I find her—as many first person narrators—to be unreliable. Renay never once asks herself how this all detonated or even think of her own role after she finds out “the truth.” How were they going to manage a pregnancy and a family? He finds out he is dying and says squat about it to his wife. Thinking about that, how so? I am guessing, and the text supports, that they don’t really communicate that well. Depending on where she works, she has a 1 1/2 to 2+ Hour daily commute each way. It will take you longer than an hour to get to Newcastle from Gosford, so we have a picture of a work obsessed spouse and a resentful partner. Two months talking about babies—how does that work? Two months of exhaustion suggests, not well!

So, I can imagine that without support and being somewhat unhinged by his circumstances that William thinks that though it will be hard at the beginning that his wife would adjust relatively quickly—given the evidence of her behavior over the course of their relationship. After all, I am guessing he wasn’t feeling the best and had gone to the doctors and specialists to get to the point of knowing he had limited time. Maybe he was really good at deceiving his spouse about this, but the option also exists that she just wasn’t paying attention to her relationship and that this wasn’t just recently. She forgets often to let him know when she will be late and does not treat her lapses as being particularly serious even after her husband has made it totally clear that it is. It is a big red flag to make light of your spouse saying that you are showing them a lack of respect. I think it is possible that he would have been genuinely surprised by how badly she took it. After all, their lives were working at cross purposes and the possibility having children? Really? When was she going to have time? The family complicity is just messed up. They should have had the decency to let her know after the divorce at the very latest. I noticed that there was not a smidgen of self-reflection on her part as to why someone who really loved her would do this. And poor William couldn’t say much at the end. And what would be the point? So, there is still a big hole in her because of that as well. At least she has William the son to see comfort her inner denial. I think it was a mistake for Travis to suggest William as his son’s name. High creepy squirmy icky factor… Looked at her reflection in the epilogue again; yeah, high. CSI factor…

William should have given his wife the chance to decide. What he did was cruel.

Man, the husband really has a God complex. Who is he to decide what is best for her? What would scare her worse, his death or him abandoning her. He and his whole family are idiots. There is NO easy way to go about this. He may not have had sex with that woman but he still betrayed her.

Very gut wrenching, I can see William’s point but there were less drastic ways of doing what he did that would not have caused such pain to all involved. He still had three years, he still had time for kids in three years and even after he died if he banked his sperm. Together they could have worked it out.

A new low and pathetically stupid. Let's assume everything is as the story says and the facts are actual facts thanks. Why was it necessary for dying husband to separate from the workaholic wife by posing A fake sexual affair in their marriage bed?

.

Who the fuck thinks that way?

.

......lets see....I Want to spare my wife the agony of seeing me die from a terminal cancer so I will spare her the pain by posing a fake Sexual affair which will cause her years of suffering and anguish ... And ensuring that the rest of my family never has any contact with my wife so she continues to suffer for years afterwards?

.

Is thus author like a moron?

A touching story of love and selflessness. From the comments I can see that not many are familiar with giving so deeply. You wrote well, Don't let the bitchers get to you.

I'm a BlueGee fan now. This story is well told and interesting, especially if it really is true. Having recently gone through a serious cancer treatment myself I can't imagine having kept the diagnosis from my spouse, so there had to be serious problems with that marriage beforehand. Good to see a new author here with this talent.

This story is just plain stupid.

Stupid

A waste.

Didn't do her right but I can understand why he did it. Heartless it was especially for his family to do this.

Really seemed dumb to me. So instead of having a couple years of loving one another, They had hate and pain for no reason.

Sad, but well done.

Wonderful story. One of the best here. 5***** all the way! I don't agree with William, but it was a good story. I suggest that you delete the comments from children who can only comment by throwing slanderous curses and take some satisfaction in what you have done here.

4. Enjoyable but kinda ridiculous. I get the aim of William in the story but it seemed so over the top and done badly, his effort to break their relationship to not hurt her by seeing him dying wound up hurting her bad along with his family. It seemed more selfish on his part, didn't want her to watch him die for his own benefit then hers.

It may be that your story is true, but the decision W. made is just idiotic. Why am I making a marriage vow that reads, among other things, . "till death do you part" if I then break that vow. Or don't you think his wife could have said goodbye better if he had stayed with her? Today, with home care, it's no longer magic. I am convinced that there is nothing more loving than being able to accompany your partner, if he has to die, as far as possible on this path!

The road to hell paved with the best intentions. Reminiscent of ‘The Luckiest Man in the World’ by Tx Tall Tales. A well written story. Thanks very much.

You write well but the plot was pretty stupid.

Seemed really fucking stupid to me.

What if she had spiraled completely off of the rails, mentally? What if she had lost her job over it and never trusted men again? They came pretty close to destroying the rest of her life.

The new husband seems to be a bit of a saint. He single handedly saved her from a horrible future.

The first husband loved her so much he destroyed her on purpose. He still had a wedding photo at the hospital. I wonder if she saved anything from her first marriage. It seemed pretty scorched earth that night.

Cant say he did the right thing, this kind of issue would be for both of them. He stole that decision from her, it would be a selfless act for someone to be willing to do, but at the same time she wasn't given an option involving her own life.

Well written though.

Too sad, you said it is based on truth. I hope not.

What William did was wrong, he should have told the truth. People cross this bridge every day and to the end they are honest with their spouse. My father died a brutal death, mesothelioma, my mother and he fought this brutal death side by side, she never left him. We all rallied to him to give him that support to the end and it was hard, so hard. When a cordotomy or a trepanned hole the size of a fifty cent piece with a pad to allow direct application of morphine to the brain are the only options to fight the pain how hard is hard.

No William needed his wife and his family to meet the grim reaper, his way was selfish by denying his wife the closure she needed to get thru it.

Scores 4/5

Very well done, but not a story that I could enjoy.

In the story William lasted 3 years after the trick on Renay. He could have given Renay a son, a daughter or both. He was very selfish that he never gave her that choice. The story was good but that's as far as I can go. I don't think it was really his choice to make also a very mean act on his part.

Well-written story. At my somewhat advanced age there's plenty of evidence that people aren't always sane. And illnesses--especially terminal ones--often create physical and emotional imbalances causing loss of context--which William surely exhibited in this tale. What a start; the first few paragraphs set a frustratingly depressing atmosphere for Renay from which she sought relief in her haven only to find even more pain. William's actions aren't unrealistic though one might question his family's acceptance and silence. Made for a more interesting story though. Finding each other at the end bears some interesting comparisons to Longfellow's Evangeline at the end. Not the most enjoyable short story but a successful composition, especially measured across the spectrum of the comments. Thank you.

Whether or not the story was based on actual events makes no difference. It was fairly well written, but just an awful story that belonged elsewhere. Probably not on Literotica because there certainly wasn't anything erotic about it and it provided a really bad experience. Please don't do this again.

1 star

There is no adventurous wife! This would be more appropriate in Romance or Non-Erotic!

On the surface this appears to be a LW story. OTOH, thematically it’s better suited for the Romance category. Many critics are upset about the lack of a happy ending, either with someone burnt to cinders or with a “happily ever after” ending. Unfortunately, sometimes stories are just sad. One cannot know joy without knowing sadness. It’s better experienced vicariously through a few words and a little imagination than in real life. If you don’t get it, you will eventually.