Better Than New Ch. 04

"As long as I can still enjoy the benefits of our relationship, I'll do my best to be patient."

"Typical male," she snorted, slapping my shoulder. "All you ever think about is sex."

"Guilty as charged."

Monday, May 3rd, 10:15am

"Good morning, Valentine. Do you have a moment?"

"Yes, of course. What can I do for you?"

"I think my dilemma with my son has resolved itself. Last week, I proposed the father-son working relationship at the new venture and he promised to consider it. I was doubtful at the time that he would agree, but I had to at least offer it and give him the opportunity.

"He came to me this morning and announced that he had joined McMurtry-Fellows, a San Francisco investment firm. Apparently, he contacted a former fraternity chum and they discussed the opportunity over the past week. I was surprised since it would mean his starting at the bottom and working his way up.

"He seems to have taken a hard look at himself ... for the first time, I suspect. When he thought about it, he knew he was ill-equipped to step into a responsible management position. He also knew he didn't have the love of the old automobiles that I did. He decided it was time, as he put it, to 'grow up.'"

"That's quite something ... for him, Warren. I have a feeling he may be making a very good decision for himself."

"Yes ... I think you're right. He's enthusiastic, even though it's going to be a challenge for him. He's even talking about some night school courses that would help him along. I never thought I'd see the day, to be frank."

"It must be a big relief for you. I hope somewhere in there was a reconciliation."

"Yes. He knew, I think, that he had been aimless and self-absorbed for most of his life. I think our rather heated discussion must have shaken him quite thoroughly. I suspect we're going to get along much better now. He won't be living at home, but he won't be that far away. I have a feeling it's the best thing that could have happened."

"I'm glad. You don't need that kind of stress. He's your only offspring. Maybe when he gets settled and finds a nice woman, he'll produce some grandchildren for you."

"We'll see. One thing at a time, for now. Oh, by the way, I understand he and your ex-wife are no longer seeing each other. I don't know any more than that."

"I don't need to know any more. She part of my past, and I like the look of my future much more."

"Good for you, Valentine. Good for you."

Saturday, May 15th, 1:50pm

"There's still time to back out, you know."

"No way. Carolyn would kill me."

"When they get to that part about anyone having any objections, I could yell out something like, 'Don't do it, Paul. Don't do it.'"

"You do, and I'll kill you."

I clapped him on the shoulder and reassured him. "Just kidding, man. You two were made for each other. I'm just jealous you beat me to it."

"Why," he said, looking surprised. "I didn't know you were in love with Carolyn."

The pause was followed by laugh and a punch on my arm as Paul congratulated himself on slipping one by me.

"Gotcha! Seriously, though, have you popped the question to Doreen yet?"

"Nope. We're not there yet. She's still battling some past demons that I can't get her to talk about. When that comes out, maybe then we can get on with it. In the meantime, I'm just enjoying every minute I get to spend with her."

"Well, you've got a hell of an advantage over me. You get to see her every day, all day. What's it like?"

"It's been great. She's all business in the office and on the shop floor. The guys like and respect her. She's learned so much in the past year, and what she doesn't know or understand, she asks. Most of the time she asks the guys out in the shop. I think that really impresses them."

"Well, in a way, I envy you. Then again, in a couple of minutes, I get my wish. There are two anniversaries that I want to celebrate. The first is the day we met those two women at Sunnydale, and the second is today."

"Yeah. I'm with you on that. I've got June 20th marked on my calendar. I have a plan for that day."

"Anything you'd care to share?"

"Not yet. It'll depend on one or two things happening first."

It was at that point the usher appeared and led us into the church from the waiting room beside the altar. Paul was visibly nervous, and I was a little myself. When I saw Doreen walking slowly up the aisle with the other bridesmaids, I could feel my heart catch in my throat. She was so beautiful in her champagne colored dress. I remembered chuckling to myself when she told me what the bride and bridesmaids would wear. It brought back memories of New Years Eve.

"You look gorgeous," I whispered to her as she stood near. I got a quick kiss on the cheek as a thank you.

There wasn't anything remarkable about the ceremony. It was mercifully brief in the overly-warm church.

"I hope we're that happy when we get married," I said in a moment of thoughtless enthusiasm as we stood on the front steps.

Doreen turned to look at me in surprise, almost unable to speak.

"What? What did you say?"

There was no going back, I realized. "I said, I hope we're that happy when we get married."

"Is that supposed to be a proposal, Valentine David Keating?"

Oh, Oh. I had stepped in it this time. Think fast, big mouth.

"My dear, Doreen. I would never dream of being so informal when I asked for your hand in marriage. It was just an off-handed remark. Maybe just a wish that I said aloud instead of to myself."

She looked at me steadily for what seemed a very long time. At last, with the slightest of smiles, "Chicken!"

"Never. Don't you think I should ask your father's permission first? Give me his phone number and I'll call him this afternoon."

"No ... no ... don't do that. I was just teasing you."

"Now who's chicken?"

"Let's not go there ... please."

I knew the fun was over. "Okay. But the subject isn't closed."

She'd been holding my arm as we challenged each other. I felt her grip stiffen momentarily, then relax. The tension was broken ... for now.

Saturday, May 15th, 10:40pm

"I wasn't kidding, you know."

"About what?"

"Wanting to marry you."

"I know."

"What's it going to take for you to say yes?"

No answer.

"Are you unhappy with the sex?" I pressed.

"No ... no ... it's wonderful."

"Then what's it going to take?"

Silence. I waited. She had to tell me sooner or later.

"The truth. I've got to tell you the truth ... sooner or later."

"I'm not afraid of that. I know you well enough to know that it won't hurt and it won't change my feelings for you."

"How do you know that? You don't know me ... at least ... my past. I could be married already, or have three children, or be a serial killer. You don't really know me."

"I suppose all that is possible ... but I don't believe it. I'm in love with who you are now. I'm having a hard time understanding what this big secret of yours is. I don't think we'd have the kind of relationship we have if any of those things were true."

"Damn you, Val. You aren't going to quit this pushing me to tell you, are you?"

"I don't want to, but I'm trying to think of some way that I can make it easier for you."

"How?"

"Uhhm ... is there any legal reason you can't marry me?"

She didn't hesitate with her answer. "No."

"Do you have some kind of disease or physical problem that would prevent you from marrying me?"

"No."

"Is it a problem with your parents?"

This time there was a pause. "Partly."

"Explain."

"I can't. I mean ... I don't want to."

"Why?"

"It's very painful."

"If you told me, would the pain go away?"

"I don't know. Maybe."

"Aren't I worth the risk?"

That stopped her cold.

"Go on. Think about it. Am I worth the risk?"

I wasn't ready for the tears as she broke down, putting her head on my chest. I wrapped my arms around her naked back as we lay in my bed. I let the emotion take its course. I had my answer.

"I had an abortion," she finally whispered, still with her head on my chest. "I got pregnant and I had an abortion. I wasn't even finished high school. My mother was so angry ... she ... she ... disowned me. I had ruined the family reputation. She hasn't spoken to me since."

"Oh. Oh, Doreen, I'm so sorry. That must be a terrible hurt. But ... you told me you still see your father."

I felt her head nod as her sobs became intermittent.

"He was hurt, but he stood by me. I went to live with a girlfriend's family. They were very good to me. I stayed there for two years while I went to community college. Then, I knew it was time to go. I wanted to say goodbye to mother, but she wouldn't see me. Wouldn't even answer the phone. It hurt so much."

"So ... help me understand. Why wouldn't you want to marry me, now that I know?"

"That's not all. I ... I have ... a criminal record."

"When? How?"

"When I came out here, I didn't have very much money and I couldn't find a job right away. I got caught shoplifting some food at a grocery store. The manager decided to make an example of me. The judge sent me to jail for ninety days because I couldn't pay the fine."

"Oh, Doreen, that must have been horrible. I'm so sorry for you. What did you do when you got out?"

"That's the worst part. I sold myself to get some money to live on. There!" she cried, "now you know! Now you know how low I sank!"

"Easy, girl, easy. You were desperate ... and it was along time ago. It's all past now," I said quietly as I rocked her in my arms. We were quiet for a while until I thought we should finish this story.

"How did you get a job at Beeson, then?"

"I answered an ad. I lied on my application. They didn't check on me. After a couple of years, I was sure I was safe. Now, it's all come back. You know the worst about me. I wouldn't blame you for leaving me. I'm not who you thought I was."

She didn't know how relieved I was. As bad as it was, I could live with it. Desperation drives people to do things they would otherwise never do. She had made a mistake in her teens, and with one thing and another, she had paid a very high price for it. In time I would get the whole story, but for now, I was satisfied that I knew enough. Enough to feel we had swept away all the barriers between us.

"I don't care about your past, love. It was all a long time ago. You aren't that person any more. I fell in love with the real Doreen. The one who was given a chance ten years ago and grabbed it with both hands. Now ... it's time to take another chance. This time, it's a big one."

"What? What do you mean?"

"I mean you will have to take a chance on me. No guarantees, just my promise that I will love you until the day I die. I will never hurt you, or betray you, or fail you if it is in my power. I love you, and I want to marry you."

Her head came up, and she looked at me as if I was some stranger that she had never seen before.

"You mean that, don't you? You really ... really mean that."

"Yes. I mean every word."

The tears began again in earnest, as she desperately tried to smile and crawl up to me at the same time. She was so exhausted by the tension of her confession that she was almost limp, and I pulled her to me, kissing her with the love I truly felt.

We fell asleep in each other's arms, not making love. She was far too drained for that. I slept soundly, now knowing all the important things about the woman I wanted to marry. She hadn't said yes ... yet, but I could wait.

Sunday, May 16th, 8:40am

"Ohhhhhhh ... god ... Val! That feels so good. Make it last forever, baby."

"I would ... if I could," I grunted. "Even Superman has his limitations."

"I like it nice and slow, just like this."

"I'm going to roll you on top, girl. I'll last longer that way."

Any regrets or worries from last night had been banished. She knew her past was behind her now, and there wasn't anything to fear.

"So ... back to the question," I said as we lay in each other's arms. "Will you marry me?"

She rolled toward me, her arm over mine, and kissed me. "Yes. You know who I am now. All my dirty little secrets. If you're sure you still want me ... then ... yes."

"Thank you. You've made me a very happy man. I have to admit, I was wondering if I would ever find what I was looking for ... but you came along at just the right time. I love you, Doreen. I really do love you."

"I know ... I can feel it. I think that's what gave me the courage to tell you everything. I didn't think I could, but ... now ... it's all out in the open. No more secrets."

"No more secrets, except the ones just between us."

We lay together for a while before Doreen spoke.

"What do we do next?"

I didn't answer right away. I had something I wanted to propose, but I had to frame it just right.

"Well ... tradition says that I should ask for your father's permission."

"Really? Do you want to do that?"

"Yes. First, I'd like to talk to him. Let him know who I am and that you will be safe and loved in my care. Then ... I think it's important that I tell him I know about your past ... at least the part he knows about."

"He doesn't know about me being in jail ... or about me being a ... prostitute."

"And I won't be the one to tell him."

I heard a sigh of relief at that.

"I want to talk to your mother, too," I ventured. This was unknown territory, and I felt her stiffen again.

"Why? She doesn't want anything to do with me. She hates me. I ruined her life, she said."

"That was a long time ago. Things change. If she won't talk to you, maybe she'll talk to me. Anyway, I want at least to try."

She looked doubtful, but didn't shut me down.

"Before that, I think we should visit my Mom and Dad today and tell them. That will be a lot easier. They think you're something special."

"They've made me feel really welcome."

"Of course, Mom will want to know when she can expect grandchildren."

"Oh ... Val ... we haven't even talked about that."

"Well, since it involves you more than me, tell me what you want. I was thinkin' six or eight, but it's up to you."

She smacked me hard on the shoulder.

"Wrong! How about two ... or maybe three, tops."

I grinned my approval. "I can live with that."

"We'll see. You only have one sister, don't you?"

"My older sister Sharon is married and living in Dallas. She used to make my life a living hell when she was a teenager. We get along great now."

"I'm an only child. I think that's part of why Mother was so upset with me. The other part was her high society friends. She said I ruined her reputation with them. Ever since Daddy became a 'somebody' in government, she was kissing up to a bunch of so-called important people in Washington. She wanted to become part of the 'in crowd.' I messed that up for her good and proper."

"Humph. Sounds like your mother's friends were more important to her than you. Doesn't sound like your father thought so, though."

"That's the way I felt about it too. It was a bad time for me. I was angry with myself, angry with the boy who got me pregnant and then took off with the help of his parents. I was angry with Mother when she shut me out. The only people who gave a damn about me were my father, my friend Tania, and her parents."

"Then we've got to make sure we let Tania and her parents know that everything has turned out for the better. You owe them at least that much."

"I owe them a lot more. If I hadn't been so anxious to get out of Alexandria and come to California, maybe none of those really bad things would have happened to me."

"Yeah ... but on the other hand ... you'd have never met me," I smirked.

"I paid a high price to get to you," she said, poking me in the chest with a finger.

"I'm going to prove I'm worth it."

"I think you already have." I got a nice, warm, wet kiss as proof.

Sunday, May 16th, 4:10pm

"Welcome to our family, Doreen," my mother said with tears and squeezing my fiancée in a bear hug. "It's so good to see Val happy again. I know you'd never hurt him like ... oh ... never mind. That's the past. You are the future. I only have one question for you."

"How many children?" the two women sang in harmony.

When the laughter died down, my father, still shaking his head offered the opinion that the whole thing sounded rehearsed.

"Let's wait and see what nature provides," Doreen said, wiping her tears away as well. We're hoping for at least two ... one of each if we're lucky."

"That would be wonderful. And you'll be here ... nearby ... I'll be able to visit them and spoil them just like grandmas are supposed to."

It wasn't any surprise that we were invited to stay for dinner. We talked about which date we might plan the wedding for, and who should be invited. I carefully brought up the subject of meeting her father and mother at some point. Mom knew about Doreen's estrangement from her mother. She didn't know about the abortion.

My father and I were talking by ourselves while Mom and Doreen cleaned up in the kitchen.

"I think you've got a fine woman this time, Val. I like her. She's got a good head on her shoulders, and the look in her eyes says she's in love with you. You can't get much more than that. I'm really impressed by how much she has learned about your business. That's a real good sign in my book."

"Yeah. I agree. I hired her on a chance that she could do the job and it's paid off better than I could have hoped for. Then ... on top of all that, we fell in love. I sure didn't expect that after what I went through with Monica."

"It's funny, you know. Your mother has some kind of sixth sense about people. She never did warm to Monica. She said there was something about her that didn't sit right. And she mentioned this long before she left you for that jerk, Trip Beeson. But she really likes Doreen. She's top quality, according to your mother. I think she's going to make you forget about Monica."

"She already has, Dad," I smiled.

Monday, May 24th, 10:00am

"Thank you for agreeing to see me, Mr. Gordon. I appreciate that you're a busy man."

"You said this was a matter regarding my daughter. Is she in trouble again?"

"Ah ... no, not at all," I stumbled, caught off guard. Again?

"Actually, I'm here to ask your permission for her hand in marriage."

I saw the look on his face change immediately from suspicion to outright surprise. "Marriage?"

"That's right. I love Doreen, and I have asked her to marry me, and she has said yes."

"And you want my permission?" he asked again, seemingly astounded by my request.

"Yes. I thought it was only reasonable that you knew who she was marrying and what I am about."

"Just what are you about?" he asked, still apparently unsettled.

"I am a small businessman. I own an autobody repair shop in San Rafael, California. I am also a partner in an automotive restoration business. I own my own home free and clear. I don't have a criminal record, and I'm free of any diseases, as far as my doctor knows." I was smiling slightly at this point.

"Your business. Is this the place Doreen is working now?"

"Yes. She is the administrative manager, and is invaluable to me. That's not why I fell in love with her, but it certainly didn't hurt."

He was shaking his head, still trying to get his thoughts together.

"How much do you know about her past?" he asked after a long pause.

"She has told me everything. I know about the abortion and the estrangement from her mother."

"Did she tell you about her criminal record?"

"Yes sir ... although ... she doesn't know that you know."

He slumped back in his overstuffed leather chair, closing his eyes momentarily. "Unfortunately, I know everything ... perhaps even things you don't yet know."

"Do you mean how she supported herself when she got out of jail?" I asked carefully.