Big Mack

"Like I said, I'm in Milton, just on the other side of Lang Park."

Yoshi wanted to be sure. "You're inviting me to your place?"

"Yeah, guess so," confirmed Mack. He was well-known at the Caxton Hotel, and he knew that the sight of him leaving the bar with someone half his age would raise eyebrows, but he'd deal with the fallout later.

*

Mack opened the door to his short-term rental. "'Scuse the mess," he apologised. It was the mess of a married man suddenly living on his own -- a newspaper was spread across the table, coffee cups were piled up in the sink, and a stack of empty beer cans were waiting to be recycled. Yoshi didn't care. All he wanted was to play with the mechanic's big fat cock.

"Want a beer?" asked Mack.

"Nah," said Yoshi, feeling a little light-headed, "I'm all good. Have one yourself, though."

"Take a seat," Mack offered, and Yoshi sat on the couch. Mack came over with two glasses of water, fresh from the kitchen tap. "Sorry, but I gave the bartender the night off," he joked. Out of habit, he picked up the remote and flipped the TV on. They sat for a while.

Yoshi wasn't sure what to do. It wasn't his house. He'd been invited back for an obvious reason, but should he make the first move, or should he wait for Mack to? He sipped his water. "You working tomorrow?" he asked, trying to make conversation.

"Yeah," Mack sighed. "I'll be up at 6am."

"I can't remember the last time I set my alarm that early."

"I can," replied Mack. "This morning."

Suddenly, Yoshi felt uncomfortable. He checked the time on his phone. Ten o'clock. He guessed the hour was late for early starters. "I should go. I'll get an uber. Thanks for the beers. Nice meeting you."

"You sure?" Mack asked. Even as he tried unsuccessfully to stifle a yawn, he felt a million kinds of horny.

"Yeah," Yoshi said, standing up. "I should get going. But thanks for inviting me over. The water was nice." He pulled Mack's front door closed behind him. Standing in the corridor, he waited for the lift to take him back down to street level.

Mack stood in the middle of the room, wondering what just happened. Maybe the emo didn't like the look of his apartment, maybe he was disappointed with the glass of tap water he'd been served, or maybe he just changed his mind. In his overanalysis, Mack didn't consider that Yoshi was just being polite, not wanting to keep the early riser up late. He shrugged his shoulders, took a shower and went to bed, making sure his alarm for tomorrow morning was set. In the next suburb down the river, Yoshi did pretty much the same thing.

*

Days passed. Yoshi checked the app from time to time. He noticed Mack's profile was still there, but he made no further attempt to communicate. Mack went to the rugby on the weekend with some buddies. They met up at the Caxton for a few beers before walking down the hill to Lang Park. The Reds pipped the Brumbies, visiting from Canberra, in a close match.

The mechanic donned his overalls on Monday morning. He arrived to find cars up on hoists, ready and waiting for him. He loved his job and he did it well, and it helped keep his mind focused. In idle moments, his mind drifted back to his wife and kids. Part of him pined for the life he once had, but he wasn't sure if he could ever wind back the clock. When he told his wife that he still loved her but that he was also attracted to men, she was surprised. She thought her husband was as straight as men come, and initially, she was shocked beyond belief to find out he wasn't. But inside, she was honest with herself -- she'd felt attracted to women before, so why shouldn't her husband get the hots for dudes? They still loved each other, but they'd been together for a long time. They agreed to separate for a few months so they could think things through and maybe experiment a little. They explained the entire situation to their teenage children -- they were old enough and mature enough to understand what was happening. That's when Mack moved out.

Yoshi went to class and spent his nights reading books, writing essays, or at pubs watching bands, occasionally pulling a sweaty metalhead into the bathroom for a quickie. He thought about Mack now and then, but that ship had probably sailed. Hey, it's a harsh world, and nobody ever gets what they want.

Mack was hard at work on Thursday afternoon, under the bonnet of an old Toyota, when he felt an insatiable urge to jack off. "Just gonna go rub one out," he told his boss. "Back in a sec." He walked to the bathroom, closed the door, and sat down on the toilet seat. He tickled his sweaty balls until his shaft began to respond. He felt it thicken in his palm. He spat on his palm and made a fist, stroking himself. The head of his huge, circumcised penis grew and thickened as his hand pistoned up and down his shaft. With a masculine grunt, he came. Thick globs of warm sperm oozed down the length of his massive prick and drooled across his knuckles, soaking into his thick pubes.

He reached for his phone in the top pocket of his overalls. He took a photo of his spent cock and the massive pool of semen he'd produced. He reached for the roll of toilet paper and cleaned himself off before throwing the wadded ball of cum into the bowl. He adjusted himself, flushed and prepared to resume work on the Toyota, but just before he left the bathroom, he opened his Grindr app and sent his dick pic to the emo.

Yoshi was waiting for a suburban train at Roma Street station. He was running late. As he checked the brightly coloured TV screen on the platform, mentally willing his train to arrive, his phone hung loosely in his right hand. He'd already checked his email account and Facebook, but he didn't have a book with him. He was at a loose end, and he felt frustrated to know he was going to be late. To pass the time, he opened Grindr. He was surprised to see he'd received a message from Mack; he thought he'd been completely forgotten about. He wondered what the mechanic had to say, expecting it to be nothing more than 'hey', but when he opened the wordless message, Yoshi's eyes nearly popped out of his head.

Mack was in possession of the most beautiful penis Yoshi had ever seen in his life. He couldn't tear his eyes from the thick, beautiful pool of glistening, delicious sperm swimming around in the mechanic's pubes.

Fuck the train. Yoshi picked up his bag and almost ran to the men's toilet. Locking himself in a cubicle, he gazed at the image of Mack's cock and came in record time. He took a photo of his smallish uncut penis before cleaning up, making sure most of the droplets of his load were in the frame. He returned to the platform, but the train he'd been waiting for had been and gone. He opened the app and sent an image of his own.

He called the person he was meant to meet this afternoon, made some lame excuse, and went home. He fired up his laptop, and while it booted, he drizzled lube all over his favourite buttplug. He rammed it home, feeling his anal sphincter scream for a delicate moment before relaxing as it gripped the base. He lay on his back, adjusting his weight on the base of the plug. The tip, buried deep inside him, pressed lightly on his prostate. He moaned as a thin trickle of precum seeped out of his semi-erect penis. He grabbed his phone and looked at the picture Mack sent him, and by shifting his weight on the plug, he fucked a load out of himself hands-free. "Fuck," he moaned. He scooped his semen up and swallowed it before extracting the plug from his ass. He cleaned up, rolled onto his side and took a short, luxurious catnap.

He didn't get a response to his own pic until later in the afternoon, presumably after Mack had knocked off for the day.

Mack: did i make you do that?

Yoshi: yeah that was in the toilet at roma st station and then i went home and fucked myself looking at the pic you sent me and i nutted again without touching myself ... like oh my FUCKING god, man, your dick is amazing, did you really mean to send that 2 me?

Mack: thanks for your pic, yours is nice too

Yoshi: there's nothing special about mine, but yours is unbelievable ... fuck, no wonder they call you big mack

For the mechanic, this was the moment of truth. It would've been a total dick move to send the black-clad emo a pic of his impressive cock and then not follow through. His wife was still on his mind, but he'd been given a licence to experiment. He knew what he wanted to do, but he didn't know what to expect.

Mack: you wanna meet up again?

Yoshi: after seeing yr pic, you need to know im in 'drop everything' mode right now

Mack: wait, hang on, i didn't mean right now ... maybe friday?

Yoshi already had plans for Friday night, but fuck plans.

Yoshi: fuck yeah

Mack: ok maybe let's keep it simple -- caxton at 6pm? we both know where it is, it's not too far from where we live, and we both know how to tell the time ...

Yoshi: c u then

Yoshi showered and slept, wondering what might happen tomorrow. But in the next suburb, Mack was awake way too late. What the fuck was he doing? Sure, he wanted to experiment, but the emotional price was high and he wasn't sure if it was worth it. Maybe this was all a mistake. He missed his wife, he missed his kids and he missed his house. And he knew he would've felt much more at ease experimenting with people of his own age and interests. He wished he'd kept his photo to himself. He wanted to call his wife just to see how she was doing, but as he checked the time, he knew it was way too late for tonight. Maybe tomorrow.

The emo slept well that night, but Mack didn't.

*

Friday rolled around slowly. Mack went to work, spending seven solid hours working on busted cars. Friday's study load was light for Yoshi, and he was done with classes by lunchtime. He headed to the library to do some research for some assignments that were soon to fall due -- he hated leaving everything until the last minute. It was warm, and he didn't mind spending the warm afternoon in an air-conditioned cavern. The river was just outside, and as he studied, he watched the ferries moving back and forth, left and right.

He kept an eye on the time. At 4pm, Yoshi packed up and walked along the river from the campus to his apartment. He dumped his bag, took a shower and brushed his teeth. He took a few bites out of a dry, stale bread roll in an attempt to settle his anxious stomach before heading back out. He changed his clothes, caught the Citycat to the CBD, and walked to the pub.

Mack was already there. He left the garage caked in sweat and oil, so he went home to shower and change. He was sitting at the bar with a cold, refreshing beer planted in front of him. He felt like he'd earned it. Today, there was no need for the Queensland Reds jersey; he knew the emo would find him. He wore a regular t-shirt, though it was perhaps one size too small. A cap was on his head, peak turned backwards, holding his long red hair in place.

Yoshi walked up. "Hey," he said.

"Hey," replied the mechanic. (Sometimes, it's hard to tell the difference between the openings of a conversation on Grindr and a conversation in real life.) "It's Yoshi, right?"

"Yeah," replied the emo, nervously brushing his black fringe out of his eyes. "Can I call you Mack?"

"Sure you can." The mechanic held his hand out for Yoshi to shake, and Yoshi braced, knowing what was coming.

Yoshi cracked his knuckles, seeking relief. "You've got a pretty serious handshake there, Mack."

Mack smiled and motioned for the emo to take a seat on the stool next to him. "Saved this for you," he said, and Yoshi sat down. He turned to the barmaid. "Pour him a beer, would you, love."

"Cheers," said Yoshi, and they clinked their glasses together before sipping. "How's your week been?"

"Fuck," sighed the mechanic, "long hours and hard work, but I love it. Friday afternoon is always the best time of the week. Two days of nothing, and a walletful of cash."

Yoshi's financial situation was very different. His bank account was nearly dry, but he politely agreed. "I hear ya," he said, raising his glass. "And thanks for the beer."

"What about you?" asked Mack.

Yoshi sipped his beer and paused. "I don't really know, to be honest. I've got uni assignments to do most weekends. Friday just feels like any other day." Nervously, he looked up at the TV screen. "Who's playing tonight?"

"Two Kiwi teams," Mack replied, shrugging. "Don't really care who wins this one." They sat side by side for a few moments. "You wanna get out of here?" he asked.

Yoshi smiled. "Yeah."

"Then drink up," said Mack. Again, his friends across the bar assumed the Asian-looking guy he'd been drinking with was a distant family member. They waved him goodnight. Maybe the strange-looking kid was staying at Mack's place for a few days.

Mack led the emo to the bus stop across the road. "We can get one from here straight to my block," he informed. Yoshi nodded and they waited quietly. The bus arrived on time, and as they boarded through the rear doors, they swiped their Go cards. The machine beeped.

They rode in complete silence, sitting away from each other. Yoshi read a few pages of his book. He wasn't sure exactly where the mechanic lived, so he watched for body language cues. When Mack stood up ten minutes later to disembark, Yoshi followed.

The night was warm, and as Mack led the emo away from the main street, the ambient noise died down. Soon, all they could hear was muted traffic and the buzz of crickets. No words were spoken. Yoshi followed the burly blue-collar man.

"Come in," invited Mack as they arrived once more at his building.

The elevator ride was awkward as hell. They were grateful they had the lift to themselves.

Mack pulled his keys out of his pocket. He opened the door. His guest followed him in, and the mechanic closed the door behind them.

Mack was about to offer his guest something to drink, but he didn't have time.

"I know you want this," breathed Yoshi, ramming his tongue deep inside the mechanic's mouth, "and I know you want me."

Instinctively, Mack pulled his face back, forcefully pushing the emo away. He'd never kissed a man before. He knew he could snap this cunt in half if he wanted to, but ...

Yoshi was surprised. "You don't want me? You invited me back to your place for a reason, didn't you?"

Mack gazed at the carpet, trying to make sense of his rampant thoughts and emotions. "You'd be my first."

Yoshi's jaw dropped wide open. Mack was a same-sex virgin. "Fuck, dude, I'm so sorry for being so full-on ... I just assumed you'd ... you know ... done this before."

"It's OK," Mack replied, breathing hard. "Just give me a sec to process." He sat down on the couch, and the emo sat down next to him. "I want to do this," Mack confessed, "and I like you, but it's ... it's ... not what I expected. And it's not how I thought it'd happen, either."

"We don't have to do anything," said Yoshi. "I can leave if you want me to ... there's no pressure ..."

Mack wasn't sure what he wanted, but he knew he didn't want to be alone. "If you don't have anything else on tonight or anywhere else to be, please don't go."

Yoshi thought for a moment or two. "OK, but ... I don't know what you want me to do."

"Well, I could do with some company for starters," Mack sighed, beckoning the emo over to his couch. "I go to work each morning, and while I love my job, I come home to this quiet apartment every night. I watch shitty TV while I think about my wife and kids. Sure, I've got buddies I could hang with, but right now, I don't really wanna see 'em. They're gonna ask questions about my life that I don't wanna answer. Well, not right now, at least. I think they understand." He shrugged. "So like I said, I come home from work and I close the door behind me, and I know I won't speak to anyone else until I go to work the next morning. After a while, it starts to feel a little lonely. You're the first person I've invited here since I moved in, you've been here twice, and I hardly know anything about you. Isn't that weird?" He took a few settling breaths. "Fuck, where are my manners? Can I offer you a plastic cup of warm, chlorinated tap water?"

Yoshi smiled. "I'd love a beer if you've got one in the fridge."

Mack grinned. "Done," he said, bringing two bottles of beer across to the couch -- one each.

Thankfully, from Yoshi's perspective, the television remained off. "Fuck, man, I know we don't know each other very well, but if you want to talk to someone ..." He left the end of his sentence unfinished.

The floodgates opened, and for some reason, it was so much easier for Mack to spill his guts to a stranger. "Buddy," he began, "I don't know where I am right now. I feel anchorless, and it's all my own fault. My wife and I got married a long time ago, but right now, we're separated. We met at school. We used to sit next to each other in maths in year 12. She used to jerk me off under the desk when the teacher wasn't looking. Eventually I knocked her up, so we got married and we bought a house in the suburbs. That was how things happened back then. We each fucked around with other people from time to time, but somehow, we always gravitated back to each other. Fast forward a few years and we've got two kids enrolled in school. They're getting older now." He paused for a second, and Yoshi respected his silence. "I think I mentioned I used to play rugby. I showered with my teammates after we played. I used to get my shower done quicktime, not ever wanting to check out the bodies of my teammates. I guess I was worried where a road like that might lead. Looking back, that seems strange to me. A loose-head prop is one of eight men who pack down in a scrum against eight other men. The game of rugby is based on men touching men, but mentally, I shut down the idea of touching men in any other way. Well, until I got sucked into the vortex of internet porn, that is. I used to wait until my wife was asleep before loading up some porn on my phone. I'd pretend I was reading the news before turning in, when really, I was staring at chiselled chests, hard nipples, chunky asses, and fat cocks dripping cum, while trying not to bone up under the covers." He coughed nervously. "Sorry. I've said way too much."

"Is that where 'big Mack' came from?" asked Yoshi. "The rugby showers?"

Mack answered obliquely. "Well, I couldn't hide it, if that's what you're asking."

Yoshi sipped his beer. "Maybe it's a generational thing, but for me, being bisexual has been the easiest thing on earth. In high school, I had sex with girls and boys, and nobody ever gave me shit for it. Maybe, in that respect, I've been luckier than you. Sounds like we grew up in very different times. Nobody in my generation will never own a home until their parents are dead, but at least we have more sexual freedom. Is that better or worse? I don't really know." He showed Mack the ring on his thumb. "These are the colours of the bisexual flag. I wear this proudly every day."

Mack reached out to touch the colourful metallic ring on Yoshi's thumb. Sparks flew, and he pulled his hand away.

"I'm so sorry for kissing you like that before," whispered Yoshi. "I didn't know."

"That's cool," Mack replied, and they sat in silence for a while. He studied Yoshi's facial piercings. "Hey," he said, trying to change the subject, "I've been wanting to ask. Are you a punk?" he asked.

Yoshi smiled. Explaining the ins and outs of darkcore subcultures to a suburban mechanic who probably listens to Nickelback might not be the easiest thing in the world. While he'd be willing to try, maybe now wasn't the right time. "Yeah, I guess," he replied. "Close enough."

Mack clasped his hands, intertwining his thick fingers, not sure what to do.

Yoshi moved slightly closer. "You don't have to be scared of me," he said.