All Comments on 'Birds of Prey - Hetero Edition'

Some of my favorite authors can make my day when they post a two or three page story. By that metric I suspect you have made my week. :) Thanks, I appreciate all the work you do and then post for us to enjoy.

I'm on chapter five and just wanted to say thank you, it is great so far.

You are writing some solid and engaging sci-fi stories that would stand on their own even without the addition of the sex scenes; the holographic "First Contact" brief made me laugh as I remembered all the boring and stupid "Annual requirements" briefings that I was forced to endure while in the military. Well done and thank you very much.

Now back to reading chapter five...

Good read, what's coming up next.

Well done.

Might be your best story ever.

You deserve to be paid for your hard work.

Giant alien asteroid hitting a planet full of dino people Haha. But seriously i freaking loved this.

Noting that Betelgeuse is in the Orion spur and 10,000 light years away, which is quite close in galactic terms, but not human ones, I really enjoyed this story . I have liked this series end to end and I think the aspect of alien interactions as development of character and stories is a great process.

Well done, look forward to more.

I had really high expectations for this and you exceeded them. Everything about this was excellent. The characters and the pacing were wonderful. I really really want to see this as a movie. The finale is as good as anything I can remember. Thank you so very much.

My previous comment was when I hit chapter five so here is my follow up now that I am done.

As I said before your stories have been solid and engaging sci-fi, so much so that I wanted say it again. From your very first story to this one you have painted a vivid picture of human expansion in space that is classic sci-fi and flows smoothly enough to completely engage the reader.

I may be out of my lane with this but I for one would love to see this particular story fleshed out as a screenplay and turned into an epic movie; combined with your other stories you easily have enough material for at least three movies.

Anyway keep writing awesome stories for us and thank you very much for all your hard work.

So far I have only "Return to Krell" unread as I didnt find the characters interesting enough. But this was the best so far. The sex scenes didn't drag too long in miniscule detail as I find some of your work to be doing, and the story itself was awesome.

I'd love to see more Val'ba'ra'nay's in future, and see what kind of roles they can take on in coalition.... and see what kind of incidents they might cause on Pinwheel.

I love your stories in this universe and this might be the very best! I was worried when you hadn't posted since June but I see that you were crafting a masterpiece! I can't wait for more from these sexy raptor chicks!

You are by far my favorite author - and the most consistent - on this site. Not only do you build amazing worlds and universes, it isn’t just fluff, there’s actual plot and character, and no shortage of content. Keep it up, you’re doing amazing work. Also, is it just me, or do the Valbarans resemble the Avali in many ways?

Keep up the great work. I love your adventures.

A real masterpiece, I found it hard to stop reading even for things like food!

This story certainly deserves a wider audience.

There isn't much to say other than that this story is wonderful and I really enjoyed reading it. I liked how you have thought about the mechanics of space fighting, usually sci-fi stories get the combat scenes completely wrong.

I would love to get a story about the Brokers, it seems reasonable to assume that the worlds with intelligent life were seeded, considering how many similarities life on all these worlds has. Maybe the Brokers are the ones responsible.

Brilliant story as always. Only intended to read half but before i knew it i was on page 30 and it was 1am on a work morning! I really love your world building and imagination when creating alien societies, I always get absorbed by it.

One tiny correction that jumped out at me as it came up twice. You can't have a geostationary orbit at a pole. It has to match the planets rotation which means it needs to be at a point on the equator unless you have some technobabble for it.

Snek, I love your worlds! All I can add is ditto to others comments that have heaped praise on your writing skills much better than I can. May you have lots of success, and many more years of writing. Five Stars!

What's coming up next.

I do like the way you build your universe. Great stuff.

I agree with the others who have said this might be your best story yet. I hope you do more of these stories where you introduce new species (not that the Krell/Valbarans/Borealans aren't great), it added some really cool dynamics to the story and made it a joy to read from start to finish.

Fan-fucking-tastic as always! Keep it up.

Will the flock go see earth and the pinwheel and what will they think about the bug queen that joined the unn on Jarilo. What's next.

Came here to read a spot of erotica, this was the most recent at the time, had no clue it was fucking 35 pages. But once I started reading I couldn't stop. Amazing writing, absolutely fucking stellar. I don't normally write reviews on this site but fuck me that was a good read.

I am almost tearing up

Lovely lovely characters, great interesting aliens (story, culture, looks, behaviour, roles, ..), good story line, nice relationship, ...

Just very enjoyable to read

Kept me flying through all 35 pages - Highly recommended!

Keep writing! Your mix of sci-fi and erotica is uncommonly good, both are really well thought out and balanced.

Well done

Look forward to next chapter in the story

Sorry I can't respond to every comment, but I read them all! So happy to hear that you guys enjoyed this one. I just finished work on the next story, it comes in at a whopping 147,000 words, so I may need to shave that down a little in editing.

It's called 'Black Velvet' and it introduces a new Borealan subspecies to the setting, lithe, stealthy cats based on panthers.

Editing should take about a week, and then if Literotica's approval process doesn't drag on too long you should be able to read it soon. Do note that you can read the story in its unfinished state and see character art on my Patreon if you'd like to (links in my bio).

I hope you'll look forward to it!

Cracking story, especially the sexy bit! Have you thought about publishing this as a novel?

It's really really good. Long (for this site's standards) but never boring. I enjoyed it a lot

The action was tents well-thought-out as was the world. The World building felt natural it never felt like an exposition dump the sex part was exceedingly well written and there wasn't a single part of it that felt unbelievable. The whole story was just a page-turner. The only gripe I have is that I wish there was a lot more. 10 out of 10 excellent story!

Great work! Fabulous plotting! Great characterizations! Winner!

Great story I couldn't put it down read the entire thing in one go didn't finish until gone two in the morning (good job I'm retired).

I have reread all of your pinwheel stories and I think this is the best. I love the world you have created and the various aliens that inhabit it. This has the best of everything as well as a vibrant planet for them to be on. I'd love to see this in particular as a movie! I look forward to a new story after Black Velvet, maybe including the new Boreleans and the Valbaranay in new situations.

This is the first story I’ve read by this author. I must say I am stunned; by the originality of the tale, by the character building, the descriptions of everything (and everyone) and not least by the quality of the writing. The sex was good, and the amount was just right. No need for more in a story of this quality.

Did I say how fantastic the entire 35 pages are?

Thanks for sharing.

This is the second of your stories I've read. I'm super excited to read more! They are so good!

This is the way science fiction should be. Hope you go viral

Honest to god your a great writer!

Seriously

I love your writing.....its so creative and makes me desperately wanting to read more.

The only bad thing I can say about your stories is that they have an ending!

This was a great read. It was long, finding I enjoyed sticking around with characters I'd gotten to know instead of starting a new story and having to get to know everyone all over again. I also liked that you really fleshed them out so well without going into the long drawn out stuff that wasn't germane to the story. I fact, they were almost too real, meaning I hoped they wouldn't start dropping in battle. That would've broken my heart. The world you built was also full of detail and vibrant. That made me really root for the good guys. The only place you gave noticablly less detail was with the bugs. I'm happy you did that. To me, that's part of writting 101. If I know too much about the enemy they lose the mystery needed to make them feared.

One of the very best I've ever read and I don't say that lightly. Well done.

Oh, the joke? I thank you for refraining to have one of the pilots, drunk or not, seeing their social structures and say "Hey, let's flock!" or something to that effect. Good call.

All of your stories have been fantastic. But I have to say the Valbarans are my favourite addition. Whilst the Borealeans are a mainstay I have found their stories very similar. I like the consensual femdom stuff but the borderline rape is occasionally a bit much. It's good but sometimes feels a bit much or "one note".

This one balances a number of things, firstly being a damn good sci fi story; the sex was worth waiting for, the build up amazing. And I want more! I was almost hoping for a "Housecat" style follow up, seeing Jaeger settle into the family. I hope this story gets a bit of a sequel (About to start Firebrand to see all the characters coming together).

Looking at this story, you can see how your style has become perfected; your narratives, descriptions, flow of language and nuance with the characters. Each of the flock felt distinct, having their own voice.

Absolutely fantastic. I just wish your stuff was on the UK amazon store as it won't let me buy from the US one!!! have to sign up to patreon to dollar bills clearly!

I really loved this story and I really hope you continue to write stories set in this universe you have created. My one suggestion would be to put the stories set in this universe into a section of it's own under the stories you have written. It would also be helpful if they were in suggested reading order it would make it easier for everyone to read the series. Other than that I just hope you keep writing this series it's so good I couldn't put it down. Usually I don't read a whole lot of sci-fi I usually stick with different types of romance but this story was so well written I'm going to have to keep coming back to see what else you write.

Great epic adventure love story, I loved it, thank you.

This is one of the best Coalition stories so far, Very Well Done Snekguy. And I truly hope for a followup. I read the list a couple of years ago and This one was added since then. Also, I very much approve the edits on the older ones. Congrats on that.

Ramjet75

PS, found housecat...

I absolutely loved this story. The balance of action, great storytelling and sex scenes was perfect. Please please continue this story. I have to know how things with the flock progress.

This was my favorite one so far. An entire race of adorable, lightweight little reversed gender roles aliens? 10/10

First off it was an EXCELLENT story and well written. I DID however want to correct a term that you mis-used in the early part of your tale:

When a superior officer countermands an order given by a subordinate to another, they tell them to "belay that order", NOT "delay that order" as you have it.

Also, the G-suits that fighter pilots wear are more familiarly referred to as "speed jeans".

One final thing that I felt wasn't correct but I suppose was necessary for the story was that this is supposed to be set a hundred years (or more...?) in the future, yet the drone technology we have currently, far surpasses what your story claims...

USAF Pilots call their flight suits "Zoom Bags."

The part about "extinct missing link between birds and reptiles" is a bit of a weird statement considering he immediately goes on to use the word "dinosaur-like". Why not just describe it as a dinosaur?

super minor nitpick

PLEASE MORE WITH THIS STORY

Easy 5/5, thanks!

Excellent story development. Enjoyable technological development and detail. The cultural and physiological detail is exquisite and quite engaging. I will be looking for your name. 5/5

I wonder if there might be an imminent tungsten shortage, with how much of the stuff humanity fires off into space. I figure there's probably a strong tungsten economy, with opportunists scouring battlefield planets for spent munitions to sell back to the military, but a whole lot of it is doomed to drift into oblivion, and it isn't exactly the most common metal. Unless they just found, like, a whole system of the stuff.

An absolute triumph. My only point of feedback is that the future space navy would absolutely, positively be using the metric system. A bit immersion-breaking. :P

I would dearly love to see more of these amazing people in future stories. I like all your species, but I fell absolutely in love with the Valbarans. "Love Me, Love My Flock" would be a superlative title for a sequel of some sort, by the way. ;)

Loved this...could not hardly put it down until I finished it. So well crafted, thought out, believable!!! I will now have to read more of your stories. Thanks for the entertainment!!!

Wow, what was there not to like. Adventure into new space, meeting a new civilization, new friends, combat against villains, a romance. Five stars. Thanks for sharing. DogFuzz.

Great!!!! Way to tell a good story!

I really like the Val'ba'ra'nay, great addition to the coalition.

Too good for a free-to-read site.

All the folks that give 5 stars to some real crap stories on Literotica should take note of this work and use it for your standard. This is what 5 stars looks like. Anything less deserves less.

Wow this story is just simply amazing. I love your stories with the species, but the Valbarans are a breath of fresh air. I hope you add a sequel or keep expanding onto the Valbarans species.

I was fortunate enough to be able to read the whole shebang, instead of waiting on new chapters.

This was an amazing, well-crafted story. Sci-fi is probably my favorite genre, but it can all too easily focus too much on the tech. I appreciate stories that focus on, well, the story. Basically, the plot lines and narrative should, generally speaking, work no matter what the genre/setting is.

Even if there hadn't been any sex in the story, it would have been fantastic. The pacing and buildup show how much care and work you poured into this.

Bravo!

Excellent story, great read, worth more than five stars.

I don´t usually read stories that long, but this one drew me in immediately.

One major criticism, however: there are no different human races. The term "race" in its current meaning was coined by white men who needed a pseudoscientific reasoning to prove that their skin colour was superior to others.

There is only one human race, and we all belong to it. Period.

Got to say I loved the story. The part where Maza and her flock initiate sex with Jaeger was outstanding, even if it was exhausting and draining, lol. I did think some of the descriptions of the city and such were a little over done and didn't contribute that much to the story. Easy enough to fast forward through, but that's just me. The handing out of the Navy Cross like it was a subway token was a bit shabby. Should have been done while everyone was in attendance in the meeting or even when Jaeger was still in sickbay. Definitely at the same time Baker was awarded his medal instead of a post script. Still, a well written and worthwill story to read.

Worth more than 5 stars!

Let it be known, that the planet broke before the Guard did.

Great story, very engaging. the intimacy of the flock was bonus gravy to an already very enjoyable read.

I just finished binge reading 🙂😚😊 This was pretty awesome, @Snekguy!

More, please.

Love an Peace

NovaM

I agree with others commenting: just Awesome!

Thanx for a great story!

WOW ! - my second read ... enjoyed just as much as my 1st read. Good writing continues to "SHINE" no matter how long ago it's creation !!!

Can't believe that a sci-fi story on an erotica site made me cry at one point.

(When they showed honor for our dead)

Awesome read.

Wow, all bases covered! Great plot, story lines and well written. A 5+ from me. Thanks for sharing.

now and then you find an author that is just beyond amazing (

Isaac Asimov, H. G. Wells are 2 of the very few.) i personally put you up to that level.. im soooo going to be mad once i finish all your stories.. lol

VERY long, but VERY excellent!