Bittersweet Irish Cream Ch. 14

Jack was turning red and Ethan had no desire to help him, instead turned to face him as well with everyone else at the table. Jack chuckled and took a sip.

He looked at Chris and said, "I came out to my family and friends two days after you left, the day before the first day of school. He approached me the second day of school wanting to know... what it was like... to have these feelings for a boy. He walked me home and we talked about it. Then he... he kissed me on my porch."

They all laughed, Chris laughed the loudest. "Four days! I knew it. I smelled it on him. He continued to be nasty to me all summer because he was jealous of how close we were. He wanted to be... just as close with you."

Ethan observed as Jack looked at him intently and Chris held his gaze, then grinned slyly. He resisted the urge to punch his husband in the face.

Chris said, "I'm glad he had you Jack, to navigate this world we're in. It's not easy if you don't have the right support. And you've always been good at that. Putting people at ease around you with your calm mannerism. Good at supporting others."

"Well I had you at first. You helped me. You're good at... helping to navigate.... things...."

Jack trailed off. He tore his eyes away from Chris and looked at Ethan who he noticed was silently watching him. He said to Chris, "Ethan knows... about us... so..." He glanced back and forth between them turning pink again.

Chris chuckled and looked at Ciaran who looked at him with amusement. He said to Jack, "Well Ciaran didn't know about us so thanks for that."

Jack went completely red and his eyes went wide, "Holy shit! I'm so sorry... I...I..."

Chris cut him off, "I'm just fucking with you Jack, Ciaran knows everything about me. All my partners, my whoring past and all. There are no secrets between us ever."

Ciaran laughed. Chris looked at Ciaran again and they smiled at each other. Jack took another gulp of whiskey and looked at Ethan who tried to keep his face neutral as he watched Jack lose all his inhibitions one drink at a time.

"So you still didn't tell me what happened to your eye," Chris reminded him.

Jack said, "Oh right. Actually it was Connor's brother. He's a white supremacist and an agitator and he said some pretty racist and homophobic shit to Connor and his boyfriend. And he spit on Afia, you remember her, and called her a monkey. So I slugged him. Repeatedly. Liam helped. This was the only thing he got off me and it was accidental."

"Whoa Papa!" said EJ with astonishment. Ethan looked at Jack annoyed.

Jack said to his son, "But, I should have handled it differently and that's what we do EJ, we find other ways to handle things without fighting first." He spoke really for EJ. Jack had no regrets for beating the shit out of Matty and wished he'd done more harm.

Everyone was quiet for a moment, then Ciaran said, "So basically, you punched a Nazi."

Jack snorted a laugh as Chris laughed loudly. Ethan found himself chuckling as well. EJ said, "I don't get it."

Ethan said, "Get this. Time for bed, son." He took EJ's hand and led him away from the table. He said to Jack, "You're going to be ok?"

Jack looked at him, and said, "I think I'm drunk." Chris and Ciaran laughed.

Ethan laughed as well. "Yea, I would say that's a correct assessment." He glanced at Chris then back at Jack and said, "Don't do anything I wouldn't do." Then he left with EJ.

Jack wasn't sure what that meant, so he excused himself from the table and followed Ethan toward the hallway where the bathroom and bedrooms were. He stood against the wall and watched Ethan start EJ's bubble bath and take off his clothes to get him in. When EJ was settled he came into the hallway with Jack.

Jack said, "I'm acting weird again, I can feel it." Ethan looked at him but did not say anything, keeping his face unreadable. "I mean... I don't know why I'm acting weird. I just... I don't know." Ethan sighed and looked around the hallway.

"You're not going to say anything?" Jack asked him.

"I don't know what you want me to say," Ethan said nonchalantly.

"I don't know, say anything."

Ethan just looked at him for a long moment, then said, "Why don't you give your son a bath while I check on your daughter?" He walked away leaving him to stand in the hallway alone.

Later Ethan showed Chris and Ciaran to their room, leaving Jack to tend to EJ's bedtime. As Ethan turned to leave them, Chris asked, "Do you mind if we hang out a little more? Unless you're ready for bed, being daddies and all."

Ethan was not sure if that was a dig or not, but said, "Sure, just come right on down after you get settled."

When he returned, EJ was in bed and Jack was sitting on the couch nursing another drink. Ethan looked at him and scoffed.

"What?" Jack asked.

"Nothing," Ethan said. "Jackie is asleep?"

"Yes, she was moving around for a bit, but she's in our room now in the crib."

Ethan nodded. "They want to hang out some more so they'll be down soon." Jack nodded, then smiled to himself. Ethan rolled his eyes and went to their room.

Jack followed him. "So what do you think of him?"

Ethan began changing his clothes to sweatpants and a t-shirt. I think he's an arrogant asshole, Ethan thought. But he said, "I think he's an interesting guy."

"Yea, he is." He looked far away for a moment smiling again.

Ethan's eyes narrowed. "You might want to tone down the admiration just a bit. He's a married man."

Jack laughed. "I'm a married man."

"Yea? Couldn't tell."

Jack stopped smiling. "You've got to be kidding me," he said incredulously. Jack thought he was working hard to not allow Chris's flirtation get to him and it annoyed him that Ethan couldn't see that.

"You're right. I'm joking," Ethan said dryly.

He finished getting dressed and started to leave the room when he heard Jack say, "At least he's not trying to kiss me."

Ethan pushed air out of his nose in frustration, turned around and folded his arms across his chest in the doorway. "Ok. Start talking."

"What?" Jack asked innocently.

"Is that what this night is about? Payback for Carlos?"

"I would never be that petty," Jack said with a smile. "But if I was and he tries to kiss me, you should just let it happen." He winked at Ethan.

"Fuck you, Jack," said Ethan annoyed with him.

"I'll tone down my admiration for him if it's making you uncomfortable," he said with amusement in his voice.

"No, you know what? Change of plans. Do whatever the fuck you want to do, ok?" Ethan said.

Jack stared at him. "Don't test me, Ethan."

"It's not a test. Do what you want. Stare at your sexy ex-boyfriend all you want. Reminisce about all the fun times you had with him in the barn which is obviously code for fucking. You want to kiss him? You want him to kiss you? Have at it. I owe you one, right? Fuck it, see if they'll talk you upstairs and make a threesome out of it." Ethan shrugged.

Jack's eyes narrowed. "You don't mean that."

He shrugged again. "I don't know what else you want me to say here."

"Say you're jealous. Say you want me to stop acting like a love sick puppy. Say you'll break his fucking nose if he tries to touch me. Say you give a fuck. Say anything other than, go have a threesome with him." Jack said angrily.

They heard a knock on the door. Ethan said calmly, "Do what you want, Jack."

He left to go open it for their guests. Jack finished his glass in one gulp. Game on, he thought.

Ciaran and Chris also changed into more comfortable clothing. Chris asked, "Do you have a deck of cards? Jack and I used to play Gin Rummy all the time."

Ethan went to get cards as Chris sat at the table. Jack came out the room and slid into the seat next to Chris. Ethan froze for a moment and gave him an icy glare but Jack did not look in his direction.

"I'm better at it now," he told Chris.

"I'm sure you are better at a lot of things at your age," Chris said with a smile. Jack laughed. Ethan felt a flash of anger but said nothing. He sat across from him and Ciaran sat across from Chris.

They started playing as Chris and Jack drank more than Ethan and Ciaran, talked about all the fun things they did that summer, sang Coldplay songs and exchanged Irish phrases. Ethan noted every laugh Jack did, and how he would touch Chris's arm repeatedly. He also noted that Chris would do the same, touching him, leaning into him, and having moments where they would just stare at each other.

These disrespectful shitheads, he thought.

Ethan tried to catch Ciaran's eye a few times but he seemed oblivious to the fact that his husband was blatantly flirting with Jack, and continued to play cards and nurse his drink. Ethan, also starting to feel the effects of the alcohol, felt like he was in the Twilight Zone.

Chris said, "I taught Ciaran a few phrases after we visited Ireland last year and now he tells me often that I'm acting the maggot." They laughed heartily as Ciaran smiled. Then he said to Jack casually, "If I remember correctly, you were planning a trip to Ireland at some point. Did you ever make it out there?"

Ethan gave Jack a glance. Jack said, "Yes, a few years ago. But only briefly."

Chris nodded. "Did all the sightseeing you wanted to see?"

Jack nodded back. "I did. All of it. It was a good trip." Ethan knew they were not talking about a simple trip to Ireland and was shocked that Chris knew.

"Good. I know it's something you always wanted to do," Chris said.

"Well you helped me plan my trip didn't you? I would have taken you with me like we planned if you had given me any contact information about you before you left." Ethan's eyes grew wide as he looked at Jack but Jack still did not look at him.

Chris held his gaze for a few moments. Then said, "Right. But it looks like you made out alright on your own out there. So no regrets."

"None," Jack said definitively.

Chris nodded, holding his gaze. Then he ran his hands through Jack's hair, making him smile and blush. Ethan felt another flash of anger over how comfortable he was touching Jack and how Jack was letting him.

At the right time, the baby cried through the monitor and Ethan got up to get her, thankful that she was saving him from putting hands on Chris. Or Jack. Or both of them.

"Can we see the little one?" Chris asked excitedly, glancing at Ciaran, then back at Ethan.

"Yea, I'll bring her out," Ethan said. "It's time for her feeding anyway, she's been asleep for a few hours already."

He went to pick Jackie up and bring her out as Jack grabbed a milk bottle and put it in the bottle warmer in the kitchen. Chris got up to meet Ethan as he was coming toward the table holding his daughter. He was in awe of her.

"Wow. She's beautiful. The boys will fancy her, that's for sure." Then he gasped as her cap moved a little from her head. "Ciaran, she has red hair!"

Ciaran smiled as he looked up. "Brilliant. Irish or Scottish roots?"

"Scottish, from her mother's side," Jack told him.

Chris asked, "May I please hold her? You are well within your rights to tell me no, as I've invaded your home enough." He smiled at Ethan.

Ethan wanted to say, fuck no, but instead remembered his manners and said, "Sure. Wash your hands first."

Once he did, Ethan handed his baby girl to Chris, whose face was pure delight. He started cooing to her and rocking her, then speaking in French to her and she smiled at him. Ethan was now annoyed that both Jackies in his life seemed infatuated by Christopher Jennings.

Jack came over with a bottle and handed it to Chris and he wordlessly took it and began to feed her. He sat down next to Ciaran with the baby in his arms and smiled at him and Ciaran smiled back.

"What's her name?" Ciaran asked.

"Jacqueline. We call her Jackie," Jack said.

Chris smiled. "Wonderful! Last name Redmond or Frazier or..." He looked at Ethan.

"Starling. But we haven't decided whose last name yet. We go to finalize in court next month. We still have to decide on a middle name too. Elizabeth to honor his mother or Suzanne to honor mine."

"I've always been partial to the name Chrissy," Chris said and smiled.

Jack laughed, but then said, "Actually, Jackie Chris sounds pretty good. Oooh we could call her JC!" He looked at Ethan and smiled widely.

Ethan wanted to throttle him. "How about we don't name our daughter after your... friend."

Jack laughed. "I'm just saying. JC is a good nickname. We have an EJ and then we can have a JC. It's perfect."

"Ok, so how about her middle name be Carla?" He gave Jack a look.

"I think Jackie Chris sounds better than Jackie Carla, don't you agree?" He looked at Ethan amusingly, who did not return his amusing smile.

Chris said, "Well whatever you name her, it will be perfect because she is perfect in every way. Absolutely exquisite." He looked down at her lovingly.

"Are you planning on having children?" Jack asked.

"Yes," Chris said automatically.

"We decided to wait a few years but yes, eventually we will," Ciaran said.

Chris murmured, "You decided to wait a few years."

For the first time all night Ciaran looked annoyed at Chris, seemingly because of the airing of their obvious continued disagreement over the subject matter in front of strangers.

"Ok. I decided. You agreed," he said factually. They stared at each other in a silent conversation, then Chris looked back down to the baby in his arms.

Ciaran turned to Jack and Ethan and said, "We had just moved so quickly. We fell in love quickly and were married within a year. I wanted to slow things down, stop and smell the roses. Know ourselves more as a couple before adding to our family. I don't think there is anything wrong with that."

Ethan nodded. "I know what you mean about getting together so quickly without knowing each other more. We went through something similar. Sometimes I feel like Jack and I are still getting to know each other, four years later." He smiled sarcastically at Jack who rolled his eyes.

Ciaran watched baby Jackie stared back at him with her light brown eyes, ironically similar to Ethan's. When she had finished her bottle, he asked them, "May I hold her as well?"

"Sure," Ethan agreed. Ciaran got up before Ethan could tell him and washed his hands in the kitchen sink.

Chris handed the baby over his husband who instantly smiled. "She is beautiful. Congratulations. EJ is a brilliant lad as well. Well done, mates. You've got a beautiful family," Ciaran said.

Chris stood up. "Well, speaking of family, it's my nephew's birthday so I'm going to call him. It's about 6am there and he's certainly up. I'll step out for the call."

He left the apartment. A few moments later Jack stood up and began to walk toward the front door. Ethan's eyes narrowed. "Where are you going, Jack?" he asked quietly.

Jack turned around. "Just going to check on Chris." They stared at each other for a few seconds. "What, you're going to tell me to sit down, that I'm not going anywhere?"

Ethan's mouth opened slightly, then he closed it. He side glanced at Ciaran who obviously heard the exchange and was pretending not to. Resisting the urge to get out of his seat and yank Jack by the scruff of his hair, he said calmly, "Do what you want, Jack." Then he turned away.

Jack stood there a moment more, then went upstairs after Chris. Ethan was pissed but kept calm in the face of company. Then Ciaran started talking.

"Chris is dynamic, isn't he? He's beautiful, charming and witty, and draws people to him, whether they want to be drawn or not. He can also be immature, arrogant, likes to push buttons and not know when to stop testing limits. That's when I come in. If his behavior is making you uncomfortable, I will tell him to stop. Just let me know."

Ethan looked at Ciaran in complete surprise. "So you have noticed your husband overtly flirting with mine?"

Ciaran looked up at Ethan. "My husband flirts with everyone. Men and women. It's what he does."

"And it doesn't bother you at all?" Ethan asked incredulously.

"Not in the slightest," Ciaran said with confidence. "He knows where his home is. See, where so many others are drawn to him, he's only drawn to me. He won't actually cheat with anyone because one, he loves me fiercely and two, he knows I'll leave him without hesitation. He understands that about me. And I understand that he's always been a free spirit, so I give him the room to be who he is within reason."

"And you just tell him to stop and he just...does?"

"He does. For me, he will do what I ask," Ciaran said.

"Wow. You guys have a very interesting relationship."

"That's the thing about falling in love with your best friend. There are parts of you that you can't hide, because the other knows you so well. And there are parts that you just accept of the other, because you never really want to change them from being who they are. Even the parts that make you want to scream at them. I accept all of him, even the parts of him that aren't the greatest. And he accepts me as I was before, and as I am today.

"When I met Christopher I wasn't interested in men as partners. I spent the first 28 years of my life loving women. Him and I became fast friends and spilled all our secrets to each other, and then it became undeniable what we were to each other. He doesn't care what I call myself, as long as I keep loving him.

"Honestly I don't know if I'm gay now," he said with a chuckle. "I just know it is this man that I live for, and will die for, and I know without a doubt he feels the same about me."

"Wow," Ethan said again. He thought about his relationship with Jack and agreed, Jack was someone who he lives for and would die for, and he knew without a doubt that Jack felt the same.

They were quiet for a moment, then Ethan said, "I just realized this is the most you've said all night, Ciaran."

Ciaran laughed. "I am naturally more of an observer than a talker. But I felt you needed to hear this tonight."

"Yea? What have you observed about me?"

"Hmm... We're very similar, you know. I observed that like me, you are a serious fellow, but Jack's playful and youthful spirit brings out the youthfulness in you. When you're in your 30's like we are and have been through hardships, it's what you need to balance you out, the type of love they give to us. And we love them back the way they need to be loved. Your love for him is easy, natural, and completely unconditional, which is what he needs. Even when you are upset with him as you are now."

Ethan smiled. "Jack is...so easy to love and so hard to put up with sometimes. Sometimes in the same moment. But you're right. I do love him unconditionally. I know there is nothing he could do to make me stop loving him as deep as I do now." Ciaran nodded at him.

Ethan asked, "And what have you observed about Jack?"

"About Jack, I observed that he is also beautiful, charming and witty, that is why he and Chris connect so well. He can also be immature and arrogant if he wants to be. And I see that he loves you and is committed to your life here. But also, he is trying to get your attention." He raised an eyebrow at him.

Ethan thought about Jack's conversation a few months back about whether they were losing passion for each other, and the conversation they had in the bedroom earlier this evening. Maybe Jack really was struggling having Chris in the same room with him, but also maybe he was being an asshole because a part of him wanted Ethan to show some jealousy and frustration over him.

"You're cool, Ciaran. Come hang out here with us anytime," Ethan told him.

Ciaran smiled. "I'm sure you'd want me to leave my amorous other half at home, innit?"

Ethan smiled back and shook his head. "Yea, don't bring him back here."

Ciaran laughed. "Duly noted," he told him.