Blessed Ch. 05: Slow Learning

There was a moment of silence as the Priestess seemed to look at me expectantly. "Er... what did she... 'Her Radiance?' What did she have to say?"

"Her Radiance Kheseila encourages you to continue your training here, in the monastery, which is one of our most sacred places - she feels that your appearing here, rather than anywhere else, is not coincidence. Once you are prepared to embark on your quest, she requested that you first journey to Nadrestia and see her, as she shall endeavour to gather what information and other resources she can to aid you in your task."

I swallowed. In other words, the Pope wants to see me in the not-too-distant-future. While I did hold some residual concern about the potential political backstabbery that such a powerful figure may engage in, from what I'd seen of the Disciples of Au'rea, the anxiety that I felt at 'Her Radiance's' invitation was more like if one of my idols had asked to see me. Or maybe the reverse? Gladra was hardly a regular person, being the leader of a monastery - and why was I just now hearing that this was one of the Diciples' most sacred locations? - certainly meant that she held at least some power among the Disciples, and despite two months' time to get used to it, it still unnerved me when I caught looks of near-reverence from her. What should I expect from Kheseila? More of the same? Would she treat me more as an equal? Or would I be expected to defer to her?

There was a reason I never wanted to be super popular - I had no idea how to act, what the hierarchy was and where everyone else was on it, and I couldn't figure out how to treat everyone else. I suppose some good came from being a loner who preferred his video games.

After a moment, I realized everyone was looking at me, as I stood there, like an idiot, lost in thought. "Uh, I'm... honored..." I blurted without thinking, my face warm. Gladra smothered a laugh, but I saw the corners of her lips quirk up briefly.

"There, um... is more. Priestess... er... Blessed of Au'rea," Chio hesitantly spoke up giving tiny nods in deference towards Gladra and I.

The Priestess allowed her smile to show, though it was now a kind one rather than an amused smirk. "Ah, yes. Her Radiance did include that in her missive. I take it she spoke with you about her request?"

The rabbit-girl swallowed audibly. "She did... Priestess."

"Then assuming Aaron has no objections, you can begin your period of... observation and interaction with him. I believe Her Radiance requested you return in three months' time, giving you two months?"

Chio nodded, while I stared. "Kheseila wants Chio to... 'observe' me?"

Di'ia failed to smother a laugh behind me, turning it into a snort. Chio stared openly at me with something akin to awe, while Gladra finally broke and burst out laughing. It took me a moment to realize I had used 'Her Radiance's' actual name, without the title. At least they didn't seem offended.

After a minute, Gladra managed to regain control of herself, and replied, "Yes, Aaron, Her Radiance Kheseila requested that Chio get to know you, as Her Radiance wishes to understand what kind of man Au'rea would Bless." She paused for a moment, studying my expression. "I do not think you need worry - Her Radiance is a kind soul, not given to jealousy or envy; I doubt she would feel threatened or insulted that Au'rea Blessed a man and not one of Her Disciples."

A tension I hadn't even realized I'd had drained from me. I guess hearing that the leader of Au'rea's Disciples wanted to 'keep tabs on me' had put me on guard. "I'm sure I would too, were I in her shoes." I glanced at Chio, before looking back at Gladra. "What exactly would this 'observation' look like?"

The Priestess smiled kindly, amusement still lingering in her eyes. "On the whole, she would simply accompany you throughout your day. The idea would be for her to get to know you, possibly befriend you." A slight pause before 'befriend' made me squint slightly at the woman. Had she just been looking for the right word? Or was she implying something more? Given all of the... well, everything to do with the Disciples and Au'rea's teachings regarding intimacy, it could be either.

A quick glance towards Di'ia out of the corner of my eye, who grinned back lasciviously... yeah, probably more towards 'something more.' Though at the same time, consent and mutual enjoyment was also an important part of Au'rea's teachings, so if either of us didn't want more...

At the same time as all those thoughts ran through my head, I also fought off a brief surge of guilt, borne from years on Earth decrying my even considering being with another woman while I was already with... well, hold on a second, I was already 'with' both Rhaliyah and Di'ia, and regularly slept with Kyuku, and had been considering talking to Stheskiths about what - if anything - she wanted, so why have any sort of negative reaction to thinking about being with Chio?

Unconscious, socialized responses suck. Just sayin.'

I swallowed and cleared my throat. "I... don't see any problem with that." A deep breath, and I looked over at Chio, giving her what I hoped was a friendly smile. "I, uh... I'm pleased to meet you."

The bunny-girl's nose twitched along with her ears. "G-Good to meet you, Blessed," she replied. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed her leg shake again.

Gladra beamed, gazing between the two of us, then softly clearing her throat. "Now, with that matter settled, let us be about our days." Everyone else nodded, and with a quick farewell to the others, Di'ia, Chio and I made our way to the Altar of Magic for my daily deposit. Chio followed behind the Kitsune and myself, and stayed near the door while I siphoned off much of my mana, though she was clearly paying attention, if the gasp she let out when I began to shift my mana was any indication - hardly surprising, given that the amount of mana I was donating was easily two or three times what anyone else at the Monastery would give under most circumstances.

When I was done, I turned and found Di'ia standing by with a contented grin. I rolled my eyes at her, and she just laughed softly. "What? I've told you I'll never get tired of the sensation of you moving your mana - it's wonderful!" Since I had yet to learn what sense Di'ia had for magic - I was pretty sure it wasn't taste, but that's all I'd been able to figure out - and the Kitsune liked to tease me, she kept using vague language around 'sensing' my mana every day.

In response, I let out a snort, then glanced over at Chio. The rabbit-girl was staring at me with wide eyes, her bunny ears twitching slightly. "That was..." she breathed, before noticing my gaze and blushing slightly, looking away while her leg shook once again.

I couldn't help but stand a little straighter, momentarily preening for a cute girl's admiration. Then I paused, remembering what was at least partially responsible for that awed expression - namely, my status as Blessed - and coughed uncomfortably. "J-Just trying to help out," I mumbled.

Chio glanced up, a touch of awe mixing with 'I'm unconvinced,' before she looked to the side again, her blush deepening. I gave Di'ia a small glare when she hummed in amusement before leading us out of the Altar and to the classrooms.

The next few days were even weirder for me than all the days before. Having Chio constantly shadowing me gave me the sense of always being on stage. Since she was going to report back to someone incredibly important, I felt the need to be on my best behavior, and it felt extremely embarrassing when Di'ia, Rhaliyah, or - most often - Kyuku dragged me off for a round of sex. Someone who was almost a stranger was watching, and given that she was supposed to observe most of the everything about me, I almost felt compelled to invite her along.

Though I'd be lying if I said it was only because 'she was supposed to observe all of my day.'

About two weeks after Chio started shadowing me, the event that started the biggest change to my life thus far occurred.

It was during the evening meal, which I shared with five others now - Rhaliyah, Di'ia, Kyuku, Stheskiths, and now Chio. Kyuku had started to cast meaningful glances my way, overshadowing the usual stream of looks I got almost all day, when suddenly, I was struck by a surprisingly intense look. I looked around, startled by the sheer intensity, and eventually caught sight of a tall, willowy young woman approaching. Her leaf-like hair, almost bark-like skin, and lack of robe (instead being covered by strategically-placed foliage growing from her own body) identified her as a Melia. Behind her, a trio of equally young-looking women - a Human, Orc, and Satyr - were grinning and quietly cheering her on.

As the Melia approached, the dining hall grew quieter and quieter as the other diners noticed the Melia's determined, nervous approach. When she reached our table, all but the faintest of conversations had ceased, and nearly every eye was watching with curiosity.

For a second, the woman stared at me, looking about ready to bolt. "I... um... I..." She stopped her stammering, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. But, rather than let it out before speaking again, she exhaled while rapidly saying, "IwaswonderingifyouwouldcaretohavesexwithmeBlessed."

I blinked at her as she opened her eyes, her wood-tinted skin burgundy with her flush. "I... what?"

The Melia's blush deepened and she again seemed about ready to run away. "I was wondering if you... wanted to..." She took another deep breath. "Wantedtohavesexwithme." She blinked, as though realizing something, then added, "Blessed."

That time, I was able to make out the half-dozen words she strung together. And, as the words registered, my brain crashed. Aaron.exe encountered a problem and needed to reboot.

Thankfully, the Melia seemed to understand my hesitation (my mouth hanging open in shock probably helped), and waited - impatiently - for my response, shuffling uncomfortably while everyone in the hall stared at us, eager to see how things played out.

After about a dozen seconds, Rhaliyah nudged me with her elbow. At my dumb look, she rolled her eyes. "It's not nice to keep people waiting, you know," she said with an amused smirk.

Wait, was she... telling me to go for it? I glanced around the table. Di'ia had leaned forward, an eager, mischievous smirk on her face as she glanced between me and the Melia. Unsurprisingly, Stheskiths and Chio were both glancing between me and somewhere other than me, blushes on their faces. I turned to Kyuku, who had seemed about ready to drag me off for sex before the Melia had approached. "Weren't..." I started to ask.

The Oni was grinning when she shoved me off the bench and into a standing position. "We've always got some other time," she interrupted, an easy, amused smirk on her face.

I turned and found myself standing right in front of the blushing, nervous Melia. "I, um..." I glanced back at the table to see Di'ia, Rhaliyah, and Kyuku shoo me away. "Y-Yes?" I replied finally, a note of uncertainty in my voice.

The Melia seemed to shrink away. "I-If you don't want to, that's..."

"N-No! I didn't mean..." I took a deep breath. "Where I'm from, all this... open love and sexuality... it wasn't... it'd be frowned on. But..." I looked the girl in the eyes. "What's your name?"

She looked up sharply, her blush deepening slightly. "Amyeris," she replied shyly.

I smiled kindly back at her. "Your quarters, or mine?"

She blinked, eyes wide. "I-I don't..."

I gently caught up her hands, which she was wringing in front of herself, holding them loosely enough that she could easily slip away if she wanted to. "Yours, or mine?" I repeated softly.

Amyeris stared at our hands for a long moment, then at me for an even longer one. "I think my quarters are closer," she all but whispered.

My smile grew, and I nodded to her. "Lead the way."

With a smile of mixed excitement and bashfulness, the Melia turned and guided me away from the table, her hand lightly pulling mine. As seemed to be becoming the norm, I was struck by surprise when I realized how easily I had navigated the potentially-dramatic conversation, likely Au'rea's Blessing lending a hand to help me get laid. For the first time, however, that realization didn't come with the sudden 'return' of my normal self, in the sense that I was still confident, still had an idea as to how to go about this encounter with Amyeris.

Unlike my pervious partners, the Melia was fairly inexperienced, leading to a session where I ended up taking more of the lead, catering to her desires (laid bare by my Blessing) and sating myself with her satisfaction. She seemed almost embarrassed by my behavior afterwards, or perhaps her lack of active participation, but my reassurance that there could be more opportunities for us to enjoy each other seemed to calm her.

Of course, it was when we returned to the dining hall, and my friends' trio of smirks, that the support of my Blessing fell away, and out came bashful, nervous Aaron once again.

* * * * *

Two weeks after my first encounter with Amyeris saw me in something of a funk. While my combat training with Rhaliyah was coming along decently, I had become stalled in my magic training with Di'ia for over a week. Further, after that encounter with the Melia, more and more Disciples had begun to approach me with propositions of sex. On the one hand, that was, in a word, awesome.

On the other hand, I felt like an imposter. After all, as far as I could see, the main reason they wanted to have sex with me was because I was Au'rea's Blessed. And while I had accepted that I had been granted a Blessing by Au'rea, I refused to believe that made me particularly special. I was still just Aaron, the bumbling mess from the Midwest. The fact that I'd stalled out in learning magic only seemed to cement that fact, while I also felt like I was somehow cheating to get all the female attention.

What felt even worse was that I still accepted propositions from the Disciples that approached me, despite feeling like I was taking advantage of a beneficial mistake, in some vain effort to lose myself, even just for a few minutes, in the physical pleasure.

As a result of my deteriorating mood, my sword training began to suffer. It all came to a head when, for about the third day in a row, I simply couldn't pick up a blade technique, deflecting a specific thrust and using the created opening to gut the attacker. Sighing in exasperation, Rhaliyah called a pause to our training, and while I leaned against the wall sullenly, the Elfess stared at me thoughtfully. After a minute, she suggested, "well, if technique isn't working, let's try stress."

I looked up, confused. "Wha..." I started, then ducked, eyes going wide, as my lover's practice blade went sailing through where my head was. Dodging out of the way, I backed up, shakily asking, "What the hell, Rhaliyah?!"

"Stop thinking," she replied simply, taking another lunge.

A sloppy parry. "What do you mean?"

This time, the strike came towards my legs. "You think too much," she said, voice hard. "Both in here, and in life. You need to stop."

A flurry of attacks came at me, and I only just managed to bat them away. What the hell was she talking about? And where was her next strike...

I went stumbling away as the Elfess' sword lashed out and caught me on the jaw. "Stop thinking." She advanced on me.

"W-Wait" I exclaimed, holding out a hand. "That's enough!"

I ducked another head shot.

"Stop thinking."

I dodged around for another few minutes, fending off Rhaliyah's attacks feebly and taking several bruises, cuts, and scrapes. And with every attack, my lover simply stated, "Stop thinking."

And eventually I did. I got pissed instead, the monotony of her voice, the building pressure inside me, and my growing self-loathing. All of it came bursting out as I made a strike at Rhaliyah. Then another. And another. The Elfess dodged and parried nimbly, dancing away from my blows with infuriating ease as I followed after, raining cut after slash after thrust at her.

Then, with fluid ease, Rhaliyah deflected one of my strikes and countered, striking me cleanly in the gut. As I stumbled back, her monotone came again. "Don't feel either."

I looked up, glaring, then dodged aside, away from her powerful overhand attack. The anger was still with me, and my thoughts now returned, skulking in the comforting embrace of rage. How dare she mock me? Why the hell was she even doing this? She had who-knows-how-long to practice and perfect her swordsmanship, while I had only started weeks ago!

As I allowed my angry thoughts to simmer inside me, I slapped away Rhaliyah's attacks, replying with my own rage-fueled blows. And still, my frustration festered. What was she even talking about? Not thinking? Not feeling? What did that have to do with...

I faltered, pausing for a moment, long enough that Rhaliyah lunged at me.

Using the exact thrust we had been practicing against.

Only, I didn't realize until after. After my body moved of its own accord, sliding my practice blade against Rhailyah's, edging the thrust just out of alignment with my body, then stepping past her, my sword almost dragging behind, to catch on the Elfess's stomach - and, had these been real swords, spilling her intestines all over the place.

There was a long moment of quiet, broken only by our panting breaths. A drip of sweat.

"Don't think. Don't feel. Not while fighting. Just... do."

"Mushin," I murmured, the white glow of wikipedia flashing across my memory for a moment.

Then, as the adrenalin leeched from my body, I allowed myself to collapse against the nearby sall, eventually laying down with a groan as my eyes closed. Rhaliyah had avoided giving me any permanent damage, but all the various bumps and scrapes still hurt.

My lover knelt beside me, and I felt a heat across my body, an odd tingle where my minor injuries were, and tasted her magic. Life essence. Living. Growing.

"Lifecraft," I sighed as the aches and pains eased away.

"Mmm," Rhaliyah hummed in confirmation. "My one Craft."

I blinked my eyes open, looking at the Elfess. Rhaliyah ignored my gaze, focusing with a frown of concentration on my injuries. And maybe a bit of frustration. As she finished, she shot me a look, and I could definitely see the irritation in her eyes.

"I've been an idiot, haven't I?" I asked, sitting up.

She arched an eyebrow with a sardonic smirk as she settled into a half-reclined sitting position. "Only just figuring that out?"

I grimaced. "I..." A long sigh. "Can I get your advice? Without any, 'you're so impressive and the Blessed,' stuff?"

Rhaliyah looked me in the eye, seeming to search for something in my gaze. Eventually, she nodded once.

I took a deep breath. "I have... absolutely no idea how to handle being Au'rea's Blessed. At all. It's like... everyone I meet here thinks I'm some kind of savant, or hero or..." I gesture vaguely. "I don't know. But they all seem to think I'm more than I really am."

A small smile tugged at the corner of the Elfess' lips. "Didn't we already have this conversation?"

I gave her an unamused - though not harsh - glare. "This is... different. Last time we talked about this, I was just... anticipating? And, honestly, trying to avoid being responsible for saving the world or anything - which, look where that got me." I sighed again. "But now... now there's so much expected of me. Everyone looks at me with this... reverence. Worship! It's all sorts of wrong, I'm just... I'm just me! I'm no hero, no savior. Hell, I'm still not sure what I think of Au'rea and the rest of the Divines! Are they extremely powerful beings? Sure, obviously - Au'rea seems to have pulled me from one world to another! But even according to their own doctrine, they aren't perfect, or infallible. And I can't help thinking she made the wrong choice. And all the disciples... they look at me and see 'Blessed Aaron, chosen of Au'rea.' But I'm just..." I fell silent again, thinking. "I've conceded that I've been blessed by Au'rea. But receiving a blessing and being Blessed... those are very different, at least in my mind. The Disciples act as though I'm some kind of... icon, or figure of import who needs to be revered." I snorted. "Someone whose opinion matters."