by missybb
Great start. Really well written. Descriptions are brilliantly done and I can’t wait to read more. Not a criticism, but I personally would like to read more about their backgrounds and more about the office. Who else works there? Is it an isolated building or in a busy town? So much could be done with either scenario. Excellent for a first time and can’t wait to see what happens next. Maybe Anna should be caned severely for a big mistake? Anyway, I’ve said enough. Hope my comments are helpful.
Especially for a first story, this was outstanding. You write very well -- congratulations on your first submission!
I look forward to reading much more from your pen in the New Year; have a great one, by the way -- five stars and a favourite.
Love it! Definitely going to show my master, so badly want him to reenact this with me in his office! Please submit an ending!
You did a really great job with your writing style and flow. The only things that I would want changed would be safe practices (like how the plug was put in) as well as consent especially because she doesn't have a flushed out back story, what happens if this is the only job she can find and doesn't like what he is doing but is suck...... Something to note though is that these are personal preference rather then writing critiques. Well written. Especially with changing whose thoughts you're writing about! Well done! I look forward to more from you!!!
You left the story in the best moment.
missy,
I really enjoyed the story, so well written, the evolution of him from just a normal asshole boss to a domme, was magnificent. Look forward to more.
Pleaaaase continue this story, it’s so good! I’ve been waiting for what feels like ages!
It needs a good bit more painful punishment. She is getting off way to easily for breaking the rules.
Continue the story and have her break more rules so that she can get real punishment.