Box Shaped Heart Ch. 25

"Yes, my name is Mark, well, at least, the name I use when I get down here for field work," the guest explained. "Yes, in a way, you could say that I am your assistant. You did give me quite a fright with the accident, though. Until then, I think you were my most no-nonsense charge. But I suppose that was to be expected," Mark added the last words, like they were directed at himself rather than his host.

"Ah, so you're like my ... guardian angel?" Carter barely managed to get out the words.

It was clear. He was insane. He was going to go to sleep, and the first thing in the morning he was going to get himself checked in a nice facility with padded walls where nice people in white were going to try to understand what the hell was wrong with his brain.

"There is nothing wrong with your brain," Mark spoke.

"Can you, like, read my mind?" Carter whispered. "Are you really my guardian angel?"

"That is quite a pompous name, don't you think?" Mark smiled. "We are created to watch over ... you. But let's not waste precious time with definitions and whatnot. I'm here for something else, now that you are back into your own body."

"To tell me how the accident happened?" Carter asked, feeling hopeful.

The dog made a small whiny sound and looked at him.

"You're a nice doggy," he patted the animal's warm head.

"Not exactly," Mark said. "I will tell you about the accident if that is what you wish ..."

"Yeah, I would like to hear about that freakish accident," Carter said. "Alex says I pushed him ... Oh, no, please don't tell me I pushed him!"

Mark smiled.

"It is uncanny how little you seem to know yourself sometimes, Carter Malis. But please let me finish. I am here to offer you an alternative. The one you choose will decide how your life will be from this point forward."

"That sounds serious," Carter mumbled.

"It is," Mark said. "So please listen carefully, so you make the choice you think it's right for you."

"Aren't you going to point me out to the right one?"

"No," Mark shook his head. "It is not my place to do that. You have free will, Carter, there's no invisible hand that pushes people to do right or wrong."

"Aha," Carter said, for lack of a better word. "So, what are the alternatives? And really shouldn't I bring you anything? A glass of juice, at least? I feel like this is important and I don't ..."

"Don't worry about a thing," Mark waved. "Now, pay attention. I could tell you how the accident happened and you will get all the memories from that particular event back. But each choice comes with a price. If you pick this one, you will forget everything that happened during the body swap. Actually, you will wipe clean all that happened."

"Can I do that?!" Carter exclaimed. "Wait, so I will forget everything? About Aron? About ..."

How we made love and ...

"Ah, sorry," he added quickly, remembering that Mark had no troubles reading his mind.

"No problem," Mark said brightly. "The answer is yes, you will forget about everything that happened between you and Aron."

"Ah, damn," Carter mumbled. "What's the other choice?"

"It's simple, just the other way around. You get to keep all the memories about the body swap, but I cannot tell you about the accident, or give you back the memories from that event."

Carter stared blankly in front of him.

"No memories of how I kissed Aron?" he mumbled. "Not one thing about how he used to crush on me when we were 14 and all that?"

"No," Mark shook his head. "I'm sorry. These are the rules."

"Then the choice is easy," Carter spoke. "I won't forget about Aron. Screw the accident," he shrugged.

Mark smiled.

"Okay then," the guest spoke.

"Wait, was that it?" Carter asked, surprised. "Aren't you going to give me to choose between a blue pill and a red pill? Do I stay in Wonderland? Just like that?"

"Do I look like Morpheus to you?" Mark joked. "No pills. You cannot believe how many jokes we say about that movie ..."

"Do you watch Matrix in heaven?" Carter asked, more and more confused.

Mark waved.

"We know everything. It's a bit too much, really, and most things are redundant, but well, sometimes, something happens and it's no longer a boring day at the office," Mark said. "But I do need to make sure that you understand your choice. Not knowing what happened during the accident will have consequences. You already know what Alex is saying. He could poison Aron's mind, you know?"

Mark looked at him as if he was expecting Carter to reconsider his decision. But Carter just shook his head.

"That's a risk I'm willing to take. Aron won't believe Alex. And I could not have pushed him. I just know it, even though I don't remember a thing."

"Are you sure? Aron loves Alex. Love can make people blind," Mark insisted. "What if Aron begins to see you with different eyes? What are you going to do?"

Carter could feel his heart getting heavy with each of Mark's words.

"Aron won't do that."

"He did think you were a homophobe and didn't speak to you for two years."

"I didn't speak to him for two years either," Carter replied. "And I was wrong. And Aron ... He was always there for me, for so many years. Even if he never talks to me again, ever, even if he believes Alex, I don't care. I won't forget the fact that I lo ..."

He swallowed the words. Mark sighed, but didn't protest against his charge's cowardice.

"Then your choice is made?"

"Yes," Carter said loud and clear.

"Then my job here is done," Mark said with satisfaction. "I should get going. If I can say so, I'm glad for you, Carter, and I hope that you won't need me again, until when you're very old and grey and we'll meet again."

"Wait," Carter spoke, expecting his visitor to disappear into thin air. "I just have so many questions."

"Well, you can ask me anything, but I won't promise that I can answer them. Go ahead."

Carter pointed toward the dog.

"You say he is my dog. How?"

"You invented Taz. He was your imaginary dog while you were a kid," Mark began. "And since you were the type of kid never asking for too much, it was a common decision we reached that Taz should exist. I took him from the shelter the moment I got here, on earth, and could not wait to hand him to you."

"Oh," Carter replied. "So if I were to choose to remember the accident, then Taz ..."

"I'm afraid he was going to need another home," Mark confirmed.

Taz barked, to confirm the guest's words.

"And that day, at the office, when you didn't want to hug me, like everyone else ... What was that all about?"

"Ah, we are not allowed to touch humans too much. There is a risk to reveal our true nature. When I came into your office the first time, and shook hands with you, you saw something, right? I could read it on your face, although you didn't think much about it," Mark replied promptly.

"Your eyes ..." Carter murmured. "They were like all kinds of colors."

Mark nodded thoughtfully.

"Anything else?"

"Yeah, I'm sorry, I still need to know ... What about that ... scandal? Why were you saying you were sorry? About the video that leaked ..."

He was talking to an angel or a heaven assistant, whatever the guy was, and he was talking sex tapes. Great. Way to go making an impression on his guardian angel.

"It is your right to know," Mark stopped his train of thought. "It was my fault for not paying attention. The next day I was still focused on you to notice what was happening with Aron's phone. Ah, and there goes a point on my record," Mark shook his head with mirth.

"Ah, damn, I'm so sorry," Carter whispered. "And thanks for telling me you weren't watching me and Aron ... Oh, but why did you come here?" he changed the topic, feeling his cheeks ablaze. "I mean, if you're not supposed to intervene ..."

"I had to watch over you, so that you don't end up in trouble by trying to tell someone about who you really were. Also, to offer my guidance, should you have asked for it."

"Ah, that's why it seemed as if you were waiting for me to ask for help!" Carter exclaimed. "Oh, wait, that e-mail to Aron ... That was you? Penis enlargement pills?" he said without thinking.

Mark laughed.

"It was a pretty good joke, wasn't it?" the guest said.

Carter nodded.

"Yeah, I guess it was. Aron didn't think so, though."

"Of course, he has a more stern personality. You should see the guy in charge of him," Mark laughed.

"Does Aron have a guardian angel, too?" Carter asked, feeling like he was on the cusp of finding something amazing, but he was busy asking about trifle things.

"Everyone does, although this is not the correct term," Mark spoke.

"But how come there are still so many bad things happening in the world?" Carter finally found his brain and the courage to ask a really important question, for once.

Mark's face clouded.

"The world is not a perfect place, and we are not perfect either. We do have flaws, and sometimes we're overworked and ... But don't let me bother you with this," Mark said quickly. "In the end, people make their own lives, and sometimes, their choices influence the others. That is why accidents still happen, and other bad things, as you say. We do not control everything. There is, sometimes, too little we can do, but, in your case, I needed to step up and ask to be sent down here, and watch over you for a little while."

Carter felt like he only had more questions now. But he knew he could not insist on this.

"But the body swap? Why did it happen?"

Mark smiled fondly.

"That was something quite unexpected. And it was, you know, caused by your most ardent wish."

"My most ardent wish?" Carter mumbled.

"Don't ask me what it was. You know it much better than I do. And now, if you don't have any other questions, I should hurry back. I have a ton of paperwork to file in."

"Wait, is Alex given a choice like mine? I mean, he seems to remember the accident and ..."

Mark smiled again.

"That is between he and his, as you say, guardian angel. That is when that guy will return from his pleasure trip. And just to give you a hint, since I like you," Mark laughed, "Alex doesn't know what happened during the accident, either."

"He doesn't? Then why is he spewing all those lies?" Carter asked.

Mark shook his head slowly.

"It is up to Alex whether he learns something from this experience or not."

"Wow," Carter expressed what he felt inside. "That's ... I mean ... I guess I should say 'thank you'. You saved my life, right?"

Mark's face filled with warmth.

"Carter Malis, I hope you will have a great life," the visitor said. "Now I really need to get going."

"Are you going to fly out the window? Or just disappear?" Carter questioned, curiosity gnawing at him.

"I'm afraid I just need to catch a certain train. Passing from this world to the other is nothing as glamorous as some people make it to be."

"Okay," Carter mumbled and stood up to see his guest to the door.

"Just for the record," Mark said, "I did want to hug you that day."

He felt warmth, all engulfing, as his ex-assistant/not exactly guardian angel embraced him. All right, he thought. It was all going to be all right.

TBC

Author's note: Thank you for reading and I hope you enjoyed seeing Mark again :)