Breaking Up and Making Up

Carl opened the front door and shouted to see if Danny was home. He didn't hear any reply, so he dropped his bag in his room, picked up his mail and sat at the kitchen table reading. Sometime later he heard the front door open and Siobhan shouting something about making tea. Good, he thought, Danny must be with her. Carl knew he wasn't good at being on his own, and this week he had missed Danny's company and looked forward to catching up with him.

He looked up as Siobhan breezed into the kitchen, saw him sitting there and stopped dead. Her mouth dropped open, and she looked shocked.

'What's up? You look as if you've seen a ghost,' he said, completely puzzled by her reaction.

He heard the toilet flush and what sounded like Danny saying something about the toilet. It was Carl's turn to look puzzled as he watched Siobhan turn and said 'Danny...' He turned to look at the door as a woman walked through. She too stopped, and he thought she might pass out with shock. Time seemed to stand still as they all looked at each other without saying anything for a fraction of a second, and then they all started to talk at once.

'Carl, it's all my fault...' said Siobhan.

'Oh, fuck, I'm so sorry...' said Danny

'What the hell is going on?' said Carl.

Danny and Carl both started to speak, and Carl held his hand up and said, 'One at a time, please. Siobhan, you first, who is this?' he asked, nodding towards Danny.

Siobhan opened her mouth but Danny beat her to it.

'Carl, it's me, it's Danny.' He sat down on one of the chairs because he thought he would otherwise fall down.

'Danny? What are you talking about?' Carl suddenly recognised Danny's blue eyes. 'Oh my God, it is you. What the hell is going on?' Carl felt his heart jump as he looked at Danny, who looked about to burst into tears.

Siobhan jumped in. 'It's all my doing, Carl. You remember Peta, the PR from the charity? Their in-house designer resigned, and she needed someone to replace them. I told her about Danny being a designer, but she only wanted to use someone in the TG community. I told her that Danny was actually beginning to transition.'

She paused and Danny put his head in his hands.

'Danny agreed to go to an interview dressed like this, to see if he could get some work. We spent the last few days getting him, I mean her, Danni, that's with an i, ready. He had the interview today...' her voice trailed off. 'We thought you would be back tomorrow, so you wouldn't find out about it.'

'I finished the project early and got home this afternoon.'

Danny looked up and said, 'I'm so sorry, Carl. I'll move out of the flat as soon as I can.'

'Whoa, hang on,' said Carl. 'What are you talking about?'

'Well, after this, you won't want me staying will you?'

Carl didn't say anything for a while, then looked first at Siobhan and then Danny.

'You two are priceless, you know, coming up with such a crazy idea. Did you honestly think you were going to get away with it?'

A big grin spread across Siobhan's face, 'Well, he got the job, or, rather, she got the job.'

Carl laughed, 'I wish I had been there to see that.'

'No, really. He was great, knocked her out with his portfolio.' Siobhan looked anxiously at Danny, who looked like he wanted to be sick.

Carl looked at him, 'Danny, that's great, you are a talented designer so I'm not surprised they want you.' Danny looked up as Carl spoke. 'And as for moving out, why do you want to do that? I thought we were mates?'

Danny looked at Carl to see if he was serious. 'You mean that?' he said.

'Yes, of course. Why did you think I would want you to leave?'

'Well, after this, I thought you would hate me...'

Carl smiled, 'No, we're friends. That counts for more than anything, doesn't it? Of course I don't want you to leave.'

Danny shook his head, 'Well, I don't think it's going to happen anyway, Peta wants me to go to a press party on Saturday night. I don't think I can go through it all again.'

Siobhan said, 'Before anybody says anything else, I need a drink, anyone want to join me?'

'There's a bottle of white wine in the fridge, I could do with one too,' said Carl, 'Danny, you too?'

He nodded, and Siobhan poured them all a glass, before she too sat around the table.

Carl took a sip and said, 'Why can't you go through it again? I think you look pretty convincing to me.'

Danny couldn't believe his ears. 'You really think so?'

Siobhan butted in. 'See, I have been telling him, her, whatever, the same thing all this week. Now, will you believe me?'

'Well, there's the other thing too,' said Danny, glaring at Siobhan, who immediately went bright pink.

'What other thing?' said Carl, wondering why Siobhan looked so embarrassed.

'Um, I sort of hinted that Danny had a boyfriend.'

'More than hinted,' said Danny.

'Who?' asked Carl.

'Well, er, you actually,' said Siobhan.

'What? Me? What made you do that?' Carl felt stunned by what Siobhan had said.

The normally imperturbable and super cool Siobhan squirmed now. 'Peta remembered you from the show and asked if you were Danny's boyfriend. I got carried away and said yes. I honestly didn't think it would matter. You would never have found out. Then Peta invited Danny and you to the party on Saturday night.'

'And Siobhan accepted for both of us.'

'But we talked about that, Danny can say you were away on business and go on his own. I'm so sorry, Carl. It was me and my big mouth.'

Carl looked from one to the other, started to giggle, and then laughed out loud. 'You should see the look on both your faces. You look as if the world is about to end in a few minutes.'

Siobhan began to smile and punched Danny gently on the arm. He began to grin too and then all of them were laughing out loud. Siobhan refilled their glasses and suddenly the mood in the room had turned. Carl managed to stop laughing first and held his hand up to get their attention. 'Tell me about this party on Saturday.'

'It's a press party to follow up on the fashion show, which has been a great success for the charity. Peta wanted Danny to meet the other team members there.'

Carl stayed silent for a moment, struggling with his thoughts, and then said something he hoped he wouldn't live to regret. 'Danny, I know Siobhan said you would go on your own, but what if you had someone there to support you?'

Both Siobhan and Danny's mouths fell open at the same time.

Siobhan spoke first, 'Carl, who do you mean?'

'Me, of course.' He said it with rather more confidence than he felt. 'But you can't.' said Danny.

'Why not? If it would help you, I'll do it.'

Siobhan emptied the remains of the bottle into their glasses, and without even asking opened another.

'Do you know what you're saying, Carl? You would come with me? You know I would be dressed like this?'

'Danny, yes I know, and yes, I would do it.'

Siobhan had a smile on her face as she refilled their glasses yet again.

'Carl, if you're sure, I would be so happy. Just for the support, I mean, not as a boyfriend.'

'God, of course not.' said Carl. 'No touching or stuff like that.'

'You are sure aren't you? You're not having me on?' said Danny.

Carl shook his head, 'No, I mean it.'

Siobhan raised her glass, 'To Danni, and Carl.'

They all drank to the toast, and they all thought it made them sound like a couple.

The evening had ended after a couple more bottles of wine and a Chinese takeaway. Danny couldn't remember exactly when, but at some point in the evening he stopped being conscious of the way he was dressed. He felt at ease being Danni and started to enjoy the experience. Carl and Siobhan exchanged a quiet look as they saw how much he seemed to be enjoying himself in his feminine persona. Danny and Siobhan told Carl about what they had done over the last few days and the interview with Peta. They were all rolling around with laughter at some points in the story until, eventually Siobhan said she had to go to bed or she would end up sleeping on the sofa. She staggered off after kissing Carl and Danny goodnight, leaving them sitting on the sofa to finish off the last of the wine.

Carl looked at Danny over the top of his glass. 'Danny, do you feel OK with all this.' He waved his arm vaguely in Danny's direction.

'Dunno honestly. It was a bit bizarre at first, I must have thought about saying No to Siobhan about ten times a minute, then when she did the first makeover, it began to feel alright. I mean, I thought I looked alright. It felt odd, but nice. Like a dream I guess. It didn't feel quite real. Like an out-of-body experience. It felt like there was another person trying to get out.' He giggled, 'Maybe I'm a schizophrenic. At one point I kept thinking about Jack Lemmon in Some Like It Hot.'

'With Siobhan as Marilyn Monroe,' said Carl.

'Does that make you Tony Curtis?' Danny almost fell off the sofa laughing.

At that point they decided they should call it a night before it got too silly. Danny found he couldn't get up from the sofa in his skirt and he thrust out a hand to Carl.

'Help me up, please.'

Carl grabbed his hand and pulled Danny up from the sofa who overbalanced and fell against Carl. He instinctively put out his arms to catch Danny and ended up with his arms around Danny, looking into his blue eyes and he felt his heart jump. Danny felt Carl's arms around him and he didn't want him to let go. For a split second they stood there, each waiting for something to happen and then they both jumped back and began to laugh sheepishly.

'I'm so plastered, I have to go to bed,' mumbled Carl.

'Me too, goodnight Carl. See you in the morning.'

Each went off to their own rooms, their minds racing with what had, or hadn't happened. Danny fell onto his bed, his hands over his face as he tried to make sense of it all. Sure, he felt drunk, but sober enough that when he looked into Carl's eyes he had seen the same look that Romeo had given him all those years ago. God, he thought, what a fucking mess I've made. He rolled over and thumped the bed with his fist. This has to stop, I can't put my friendship with Carl at risk. It had felt good when Carl put his arms around him, though, and with that thought in his mind, he fell asleep.

Carl sat on the edge of his bed, and all he could think of was Danny's face, looking for all the world as if he were asking Carl to kiss him. He fell back onto the bed and moaned out loud. No, he couldn't do this again he thought. Look what it had caused last time. The last image that flashed into his mind before he fell to sleep was Danny's tongue sliding across his pink lips.

Chapter Thirteen

They both woke late, Danny had fallen asleep still fully dressed and his head pounding. He lay there for a few minutes unable to think clearly, and then the memories of the evening barged their way into his mind. When Carl had held him, Danny had felt like he had with Romeo; he had almost kissed Carl before they had taken a step backwards. What a farce that would have been. He groaned, how would he be able to face Carl now?

The first thing he had to do was to get out of the dress and clean himself up. He swore that he would never dress again, it caused too much trouble. Every time he wore a dress something happened that he couldn't control. He couldn't cope with the emotional turmoil it set up in him. He would have to call Peta and tell her the truth. It was a pity, though, he had begun to enjoy the feeling of being Danni for a while. He stumbled into the bathroom and set about removing his ravaged makeup as Siobhan had taught him.

Carl slowly woke up, a massive headache beginning to form behind his eyes. He opened them once, and then rapidly closed them again. He wondered if Danny felt as bad, and then what had happened last night flooded into his mind. Carl remembered how he had felt when Danny had fallen into his arms. He had come so close to kissing him and he thought he had seen a glimmer in Danny's eyes at the moment before they both pulled back. God, what would have happened if he had kissed him? Carl felt his face go red as he thought about how close he had come to disaster. He groaned, how would he be able to face Danny now?

He needed some coffee and paracetamol first before deciding to do anything. He took off his Armani suit trousers, thinking he hadn't been the best idea to sleep in them. They would have to go the cleaners today. He pulled on some Levis and a white t-shirt before heading out into the kitchen. Having taken a couple of paracetamol with some orange juice, he started the coffee percolator and sat down at the table.

Having cleaned himself up, Danny put on a pair of loose sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt. He heard Carl moving around outside and he smelled the coffee brewing. He hesitated before opening the door, but he knew it couldn't be put off any more. He eased open the door to see Carl with his back to him, in blue jeans and a white t-shirt. Before he could stop himself he thought how good Carl looked. He shook his head, he had to stop thinking like that.

Carl heard Danny open his door, and he didn't want to turn round. He wondered if Danny would still be dressed as a woman and he frankly didn't know how he would react if he was. He finally turned round with a cup of coffee and felt almost disappointed to see Danny in sweatpants and a t-shirt with his hair in its ponytail. The second thing he noticed were those damn blue eyes, and he moaned inwardly.

'Coffee, Danny? Paracetamol are over there if you need them.'

'Coffee, please, Carl. Can I take the whole bottle?'

'Only if you want to end up in A&E at the hospital,' said Carl.

'Don't tempt me, the way I'm feeling, that might be a good option.'

Danny took a couple of tablets, and coffee in hand, sat down opposite Carl.

'Look, about last night...' Both spoke at the same time and they laughed.

Danny held his hand up, 'Me first, Miss.'

Carl smiled and nodded.

'I wanted to say that I've thought about everything and I have decided not to go tomorrow. I'm going to tell Peta the truth and move on. It's easier all round. What were you going to say about last night?'

Carl was caught off guard, he hadn't expected Danny to say that. He took a long drink from his coffee to give him time to think.

'Oh, it doesn't matter. Why? I thought you were keen to go ahead last night. You seemed to be so at ease with yourself. I haven't seen you so happy for a while.'

'I don't want to impose on you. I know it would be embarrassing for you to be seen with me, and for everyone to think we're together. I couldn't do it to you.'

'Danny, I wouldn't have offered if I didn't want to do it. It will only be for one night after all.' He paused, and felt a rush of blood as he said, 'Anyway, I could never be embarrassed to be seen with you looking as good as you did last night.'

Carl's words hung in the air, as both of them thought about what they meant.

'Carl, that's nice of you, but I've made up my mind.' As he said it, it occurred to him there might be something more behind Carl's encouragement.

'OK, Danny, if that's your decision, when will you tell Siobhan?'

'It's nothing to do with Siobhan, it's what I want to do.' Danny said tetchily.

'OK, OK. It's your decision, I know. Look, I've got to start my report for the project, so I'll see you later on? Fancy a drink at the pub?'

'Yeah, that would be great, Carl. I've got a commission to work on so that would be good.'

Both headed off to their rooms, each thinking that somehow they had upset the other.

Danny didn't have anything to work on, as his pipeline had dried up, but he didn't want Carl to know that. He spent the rest of the day making cold calls and trying to chase up old contacts. He got a couple of small jobs from the calls but they wouldn't pay much, almost doing them for nothing to keep the contacts alive. Maybe he had been too hasty in deciding not to go for the charity work, it would give him an income stream and he was sure he could leverage it into other work. He pushed back his chair and stared at the wall. He thought about what Carl had said about him being so relaxed when he was dressed as Danni; was it true? When he became Danni, he did feel different. He stood up and went to the wardrobe where he had hung the dress he had been wearing yesterday. He would have to get it cleaned and pressed.

He picked up the panties and the bra from the chair where he had laid them this morning. His fingers ran over the silky material and he felt his cock stir as he did so. He closed his eyes as his fingers pushed down his sweatpants and wrapped themselves around his hardening cock. He found himself pushing down his sweats, kicking them into a corner of the room. Almost without thinking, he pulled the panties up his legs and sighed as they cradled his balls.

His cock had now become fully erect, and he began stroking it with one hand whilst the other caressed the material now stretched across his backside. He closed his eyes once more and his hand moved faster along his cock. He felt his climax approaching and at that moment it burst forth into his hand, he realised he had been thinking about Carl.

Carl had tried to concentrate on his report but his mind kept floating off to last night. He thought Danny had looked so pretty in the dress and the makeup Siobhan had created. His hair was different too, how had he achieved such a feminine style? Carl sighed, what was happening here? He kept coming back to that moment when Danny had fallen against him. He had been sure he saw a longing in Danny's eyes, but neither of them had done anything. Carl felt his cock begin to swell as he thought about that moment. Well it was a moot point, he thought, as Danny had decided not to go ahead with the charity work, so there would be no need for them to go the party.

Carl finally got his attention focused on his report and by late afternoon, he had wrapped most of it up, it only needed a little polishing. He pushed back his chair and decided he would celebrate with a drink. He knocked on Danny's door.

'Danny, I'm heading to the pub, do you want to come?'

'OK, give me a minute, got to change.' Danny called back.

Carl sent a text to Siobhan, 'off 2 pub, u want 2 come?'

His phone beeped with a reply, 'sure c u in 2 mins. Jools 2'

Danny came out of his room as the doorbell rang.

'I asked the girls if they wanted to come, is that OK?'

Danny shrugged, 'Yeah, it's fine by me.'

Carl opened the door and Siobhan and Julia burst in, all smiles and kissing cheeks. Julia hooked her arm into Danny's. 'How have you been Danny? What trouble have you got into while i've been away?'

Danny looked desperately at Siobhan, but she had her arm In Carl's and was facing the other way.

'Nothing much, how about you? How was the shoot?'

'Daaahling, St Moritz is so last year, don't you think?' she drawled. 'They were all a bunch of upper class pillocks, Darling this and Darling that. Hated them, but the money was good.' She squeezed his arm, and they followed the other two out of the door. 'Now, tell me the truth about what you and wifey got up to.' They were walking a few paces behind the others and Danny wished he knew what Siobhan had told her.

'What did she tell you?'

'Everything Danny, no secrets between us.'

Danny gulped and knew he had gone pink. 'Well, if you know why do you want me to tell you?'

'Touché, Danny boy. You and her got up to something that I know. But she won't tell me what. Yet, that is. But I will wheedle it out of you before the night is finished.'

Danny heaved a sigh of relief, Siobhan hadn't told Julia, so he wasn't going to say anything. They chatted on the way down to the Duke's Head and were lucky enough to find a table with a view of the river. The sun glinted off the water where rowers from the nearby rowing clubs were still out on the river. It was one of those spring evenings when you could almost smell summer around the corner. Julia made everyone laugh about the people she had met on the shoot for an upmarket society magazine. There came one of those pauses that happens when the laughter dies away and nobody says anything. Siobhan broke the silence. 'So, Danny, my boy, are you up for the party tomorrow?'