Broken Salvation

Even with how fast things were moving, it seemed like Matthew was taking his time to get to know my body. He was touching me so softly, fingers probing at my opening, but not fully going in. Just gathering my wetness so he could use it on my clit while he rubbed slow circles around it, making me whine.

Matthew looked up to me as he played with my pussy, smirking a little when he saw the desperate look on my face. "You really want it, don't you?" he asked, finally sliding his finger inside me slowly. The stretching hurt a little, but it was replaced with waves of pleasure as he curled his finger just right to hit my g-spot. My hands came down to hold tightly onto his shoulders, not wanting to fall over from the shocking euphoria. "Damn, you're so tight." Matthew commented as he slipped his finger in and out slowly, making sure to hit that perfect spot each time. Before deciding to add another, he pulled the one he had out of me and led me to sit on the step that led up to the pulpit.

The hard floor was cold against my bare butt as I leaned back, my elbows propped up on the stage with the altar right behind me. Matthew kneeled right between my legs, scotting up until the head of his cock was pressing against my pussy in a way that reminded me of how it had been with Father Boss the last time we were together. This time was different though, Matthew was the one dragging his tip between my lips, getting it nice and coated with my juices before he pressed it against my small entrance. "Can I?" He asked in a low tone.

I was nervous, but at the same time this was exactly what I wanted. I had gotten to this point a few weeks ago. I had dreamed of the next bit so many times in the last few days., I grinned and nodded, doing my best to relax my bottom section for the man as I felt him as he started to push into me. It was a lot at once. I gasped as I felt myself stretching around his cock as it was buried inside me. It burned a bit, but I was fighting against the discomfort as he groaned from the feeling of my tight walls surrounding him. Once he was all the way in, he stayed put for a moment, breathing hard as he looked down at me, pressing our foreheads against one another again.

I gazed up at him, my arms moving to wrap around his neck. "Does it hurt?" Matthew asked, being as still as he possibly could.

"A-A little," I answered. "Not too bad though. You... can move if you want." I wished at that moment that I could be more sexy. Like the girls in the movies I had seen recently. I must have been enough though because Matthew slowly began to pull out before sinking himself right back into me, I couldn't help but continue moaning gently as he did. That was his pace at first, slow and steady as he thrusted in and out of my throbbing pussy. It was an amazing feeling.

It wasn't long before he was speeding up though. As the speed was changing up, the feeling of him inside me began to change. The discomfort was fading out and it soon felt really nice having his cock pounding into me, pushing my butt down against the step under us. I began to moan, still trying to keep myself as quiet as it could, but it wasn't really working. Not when he was filling me up so well.

"M-Matthew!" I tossed my head back, now dragging my nails down his back and leaving behind small scratches on his skin. "Oh! Feels so good!" I shouted. There was no keeping me quiet at that point. My own voice was bouncing off the walls and coming right back to me. My face was flushed but in excitement, not only tinged with embarrassment. I felt like my whole body was heating up like crazy with him on top of me like that, making me feel so good.

Maybe I had been pent up for too long because it took what seemed like no time for me to start to cum around his cock. Thankfully, it was not as messy as it had been last time with Father Boss. My pussy just clamped around him and gripped his cock as he kept pumping away until he hit his end and we were both left on the steps of the altar, panting and staring at one another. We kissed hard as we hugged.

I couldn't believe I had really done something that amazing and personal in a holy place. Thankfully, it would only be known between me and Matthew. No one else had to know.

In the eyes of the others, I could still be a good girl. But definitely not the eyes of the Lord.

Epilogue

Smacking down my new pack of cigarettes against the palm of my hand as I'd seen Father Boss do hundreds of times, it had been over four hours since my last smoke. I wasn't going to wait any longer for my next. I took a deep breath of fresh air in preparation as I stood outside the bookstore I began working at a few months before. Life had changed a lot for me, not only just moving out from Father Boss' place to my apartment above Margaret's garage. Matthew and I were growing closer and closer as time went on, our relationship flourishing.

Father Boss and I were still very close, through working with each other, but hanging out with Matthew meant I didn't have as much free time to hang around the church. When I was there, Boss and I would still regularly sneak out for a cigarette together, but often with Matthew in tow as well since he began to pick up the habit from me. It was nice, now I had more than just one smoking buddy to spend time on the back step with. It's no fun sitting on a freezing cold step in the rain on your own. Needless to say, I did not quit after that pack Matt had bought for me that day, but I did try my best to keep an eye on how much I was smoking. I am not stupid to know that it's not a brilliant thing to be doing. I tried to convince myself that as Father Boss taught me, my smoking must have God's blessing. Talking of which, back at the apartment I made good use of the glass ashtray that sat pride of place right next to the sewing machine I had set up at the small kitchen table. I am better at emptying that one compared to the plant pot.

As for the apartment, Margaret would drop by here and there, normally on Fridays with a casserole or something from the crockpot for dinner. Plus the occasional bunch of flowers. I appreciated the meals as I didn't have to cook every day for myself and unless Matthew was staying over I would always have leftovers for the night after as well. She really helped me get new furniture as well, putting a request in the newsletter at church asking for donations of used, but still in good condition pieces. I ended up with some nice stuff that was far more comfortable and far less dated than what had been there before.

Still standing outside the book shop I quickly unwrapped the plastic surround from my cigarette pack making sure not to litter it was stuffed back in my bag, looking up, I smiled happily as by the time I had the filter between my lips and the lighter in my hand, Matthew was pulling up in his "new" old car he had bought to make it easier for him to get to and from work. Thankfully, that meant I also had a ride home a lot of the time too. It was also nice that he let me smoke in his car, so when I got in the passenger's side I lit up the end and took in a long, much needed inhale. 4 and half hours is a long time. After taking the filter from between my lips, Matthew leaned over and kissed me before I could even let the smoke out. He liked to tease me like that.

"Hey Jules, fun day at work?" He asked as he knew to wait to ask me anything until I had lit my cigarette and had dragged on it, as he then started driving down the road.

I rolled my eyes and before saying anything I pulled once again and then blew the smoke out the cracked open window. "I wouldn't say it was fun, we had that old guy Albert asking about obscure almost out of print books. We eventually found a single copy for him, but in all it was a nice enough time." I answered before bringing the filter back to my lips. Since it was Tuesday, we headed the short distance to the church so Matthew could do choir practice and I could straighten up in the Sunday school room. I was still very devoted to the church and the teachings there, but working at the bookstore really opened up the world to me in a way it never had been before. I could read and learn a lot about the world around me there and the lives of different people who were not a part of the church.

Because of that I made a lot of changes about myself. My skirts were forever getting shorter, most of them coming up well up over my knee, on warm days they were half way up my thigh. I was even sometimes wearing tight fitting pants. I also spent more time looking at and using my hands as such my nails were always now painted all kinds of different colors. Reds, blues, pinks, and just for Matthew on special days if I was even wearing any, they often matched my panties. I felt like I was really finding myself those days and it was so nice.

Things with my parents seemed to go back to normal. Mom came back home after Granny got better and it was actually nice to see them every Sunday at church. It was good to see my Dad looking better than he did. They both properly met Matthew and seemed to like him, though that wasn't too surprising. Who wouldn't? I love him. The last time they chatted my Dad even shook his hand. We all got along well enough, having more of a respectful relationship than what we had before. They still didn't know I was smoking, on Sunday mornings I was freshly showered and doused in body spray. I could never come clean about it to them specifically. Even so, I was enjoying seeing them and the renewed connection we were forming.

Getting to the church, we parked up and sat in the car as we waited as I nearly finished my cigarette. Heading to the church I stubbed it out in the plant pot before we hurriedly went inside via the back door and were soon met with most of the choir and Father Boss already prowling around in there. "Glad you could join us." Father Boss teased, pointing to his watch on his arm as Matthew practically sprinted over to the group and I went off to the basement to start getting things ready. I cleaned up around there first, listening to practice like I had gotten so used to doing those days. The games they played before they sang beautifully, only messing up here and there. I sat down at my desk and got so into working on the lesson plan for Sunday. I was so focused on my own words and no natural light, I didn't even realize the time passing and that they had finished until I jumped as the speaker squeaked. I then heard Father Boss and Matthew voices. I stopped what I was doing. They must have been close to the mic that was connected to the speaker.

"Do you really think you're ready for such a big leap?" Father Boss asked, his tone sounded a bit worried. "How do you think Julia will take it?"

Hearing my name, my ears perked and I looked over to the speaker. Wishing it could give me more answers.

"I think she will understand. It's... the normal next step for a man my age, right?" Matthew sounded unsure himself and I wondered just what they could be talking about. My blood felt like it was running cold though. Was he leaving me? Was what we had over?

I was frustrated and annoyed that I couldn't hear anymore since they must have walked away from the mic, but it made me really curious. My mind was spinning. I couldn't even keep working on my lesson plan. I now couldn't focus on it, I would have to come back to it later on that week. Instead I went back up to the main floor, my heart was thumping and my head was confused. At that moment I realized I was still sucking and chewing the end of the pen. I knew I then needed a cigarette before anything else. At the top of the stairs I found the two men still in the same area, talking in hushed terms, obviously shutting up and changing the topic as soon as they saw me. They have never discussed the weather that loudly before.

I waved at the two of them and they smiled happily back at me. I put two fingers to my lips a couple of times in an exaggerated way, to let them know where I was going. "I will be out in a minute to join you." Matthew declared almost at the top of his voice from near the pulpit. I guessed it wasn't going to start raining.

Him joining me and "borrowing the cigarette" for a couple of drags was happening more and more often now, but he had to be careful because he was acutely aware of his singing voice. I just loved the company. Spending more and more time with him. Cigarette or not. But at this moment I was more concerned as to what he was currently thinking. He had said nothing about anything different this morning when getting out of bed.

I sat down tucking my short skirt the best I could under my bottom as I settled in on my spot on the cold back step and focused on my hand as I flicked the lighter. The smoke could not hit my lungs soon enough. The tip fizzed loudly as my lungs worked as my brain was frazzled. I pulled hard on the cigarette for long three drags. Just wishing the nicotine would hurry up and do its job and relax me. As I sat there and soon heard Matthew's loud footsteps bounding through the church. The soles of his shoes created a thudding echo on the tiled floor. He was then standing in front of me, he affectionately squeezed my shoulders before his fingers stretched out asking for me to share the cigarette. I smiled back and handed it to him, he took an equally big drag, for him.

"Hey Jules, when you're finished Boss wants to meet you in the Sanctuary, near our spot to discuss something important." He stated as if it had been prepared.

I looked confused, "our spot" was where I lost my virginity with him. It was our in joke we would giggle as to what we had done when Boss stood there and gave his weekly sermon. Why wouldn't Boss ask me himself if he wanted to talk to me! Either way as I asked with my fingers and then took the cigarette back I agreed. "Give me five minutes!" I grinned and blew a kiss before I rubbed my tongue along my lips together tasting the hint of tobacco and again focused on my hand and pulled much needed smoke into my lungs.

With my cloudy exhale Matthew disappeared back inside leaving me alone with my now half smoked cigarette. What was going on with the two most important men in my life? Why were they talking to each other and to me in riddles? I sat there extremely confused and set about as quickly as possible finishing off the cigarette with the deepest drags I could do. I stubbed it out on the stone floor and then squished the butt into the near mountain of others in the terracotta pot. I again noted I really needed to empty it. Boss just kept ignoring it.

I got up, gently coughed as I wiggled my hips, adjusting the hem of my skirt down my thighs a little, and then straightened my blouse. With a deep breath of trepidation wiping the growing sweat off the palms of my hands on my skirt Ithen headed inside. In the last twelve months or so after spending so much time in the church there had personally been a lot of changes. I've grown up, I've developed whilst I have lost and found something new, but in the process I've met some amazing people. But as I looked around many things have stayed the same. There along from the big wooden doors, dotted by the walls were the nice smelling flowers showing off stained glass windows, but there in the middle was not Boss, but Matthew all dressed up nicely as if he was performing in the choir. Under the bright lights he looked both handsome and amazing.

Feeling even more confused I looked around for Boss but he was not there. I took another deep breath and sighed, what was I going to do now? Talk to Matthew or go to Father Boss's office.

Before I could ask Matthew what I was meant to do, as I got closer he dropped down to one knee in front of me, smiling whilst looking at me. I came closer until I was standing right in front of him. I felt as if I was holding my breath, my eyes instantly followed his right hand and widened when they focused on a black velvet box that he brought out of his pocket.

"I know it hasn't been that long since we met... I just know what I want for the rest of my life." He explained as his fingers pincered open the box, holding it up to me. Inside was a beautiful shimmering diamond ring with a gold band. It looked old, but stunning at the same time.

I quietly gasped as I felt myself starting to breathe again. My heart was already thumping like crazy and now after the cigarette my mouth was feeling very dry as I stared down at him and the gorgeous ring nestled in the box. I was speechless. Tears started forming in my eyes. I couldn't believe what was about to happen.

"Julia Ruth Green, will you marry me?" He smiled looking hopeful up at me as his words flowed out so smoothly. I started slowly nodding in agreement as a tear of happiness trickled down the side of my nose. How could I say no to that?

I blurted "Yes of course!" As I put out my shaking left hand in front of me. He held it still and carefully slid the ring on my finger and stood up.

More happy tears poured down my face as we kissed and hugged. I couldn't stop telling Matthew how much I truly loved him. We stood there hugging, kissing, and crying for what felt like ages. Not really sure what we had to do next. It was then I caught out of the corner of my eye Father Boss standing outside his office door. His hands clasped together almost praying whilst his face had tears as well. It was then I noticed that he showed off the proudest, biggest grin.

I am a good girl.

The end.