All Comments on 'Brother & Sister Face Their Future'

Fun story but the dialogue was ridiculous.

Since they are a bit older than the usual senior, can they be mature enough that Scott has a dusting of chest hair across that upper chest. And maybe a light treasure trail to what we hope is a healthy pubic bush? Make him all man!

Cute story about twins that have always been in love. No surprises.

I agree with another reader. Your dialogue needs work:

"I love you more than I can express at this moment." Are the words I express.

Oh more please, they have a week together maybe after this they cant be apart and stay as a couple in secret for their college years and then tell the parents they are together forever and make some babies of their own.

A perfect relationship.

I hope they can continue.

Can’t wait for the next chapter.

As another comment or said, the dialogue is just too sappy. Way over the top for me, too. And what two people with so much love and lust care about first eating a big meal? An apple would do very nicely.

English appears to be not your first language. Your writing is stilted and awkward. Just no realism in language at all.

Scored you 3/5 for effort but lack of proper English detracted from the story.

Good start to a sexy and loving couple. I hope you keep writing about these two who are so in love. I hope they will end up together and make a baby.

She has never been kissed and yet can deep throat her brother for her first sexual act? Not too realistic.

The flow is awkward and too formal. The dialogue sounds more like a bunch of announcements or declarations of fact. .

SUCH A PATHETIC ABRUPT END

I enjoyed the story, however it was very predictable, brief, and level. There were zero emotional dynamics. It simply rode at the same level throughout.

Good story, just not finished. What happens the rest of the time at the cabin? Do the plan fir the future, immediate and long term? Does one decide to go to the other's college so they can be together? Do they tell their parents? What's their reaction? Do they figure a way to keep their love forever? Arrrrgggghhhh! MORE!

Thank you for your comments. You gave me more inspiration