Building Bridges

Note: Limited sex. More focus on the emotional relationship of a married couple.

* * *

"Guess what, Len? I'm gonna get a big one!"

Inês was too excited to let me try and answer her question. but I was delighted by her answer. She'd put in the work and deserved getting leadership of a big project.

"It's going to be a major bridge. Let me show you where."

She pulled out her iPad and zoomed in on a river in southern Africa.

"It's going here and we're going to live in the suburbs of this city... here," pointing at a place that didn't look far from the river. And I'm going to take charge. I get to make all the decisions."

"I'm so pleased for you. For us. You know I'm your biggest supporter. When do we leave?"

"About three months, although I might make a trip ahead to make sure that we get the home the company has promised. It should be good. A garden with a gardener. A limo with a driver. We are going to love it. I just need to make sure you can write novels on your visa. I have one of the company lawyers sorting that out for us."

* * *

"I hope you weren't disappointed." I said when Inês got home from her advanced visit.

"Oh, no! I think it's going to be brilliant. I met some of the team and they are brilliant. Much better than I expected. I can build on what they already have and increase their efficiency. I need to do that. Women get judged to a higher standard. I want more big projects. I must hit the quality thresholds and come in on schedule or under budget."

"You're the star project architect, Inês. You're only 25 and you have a multi-million pound project in Africa! You know they think nearly as highly of you as I do. But what about our home? What about where we'll live?"

"Oh Len, it's going to be so lovely. It'll be nice to speak Portuguese at home again. It's sort of like upstairs downstairs. We'll have three servants: a cook, a driver, and a gardener. They literally live in rooms in the attic and they really look the part."

"What do you mean?"

Her tone changed. She moved from high powered architect to innuendo, knowing how much I love her to tease me.

"Well take Amadeu, our gardener. He's out there raking and clipping and planting seeds all day. The gardens look exquisite and he barely fits in his little t-shirt and shorts. Or João, our driver. He doesn't just drive, he maintains the car, too. So he wears a uniform and a cap when he's out and about. Then he changes into a greasy overall to do work on the engine or wash the body. He looks so lovely making that black shiny exterior all soapy."

"Wow, Inês. Am I hearing what you're telling me?"

"What do you think I'm telling you?"

"You know. When we met at university and you were still going out with Chris. I told you how I loved seeing you after you'd spent time with him."

"Len! I have an important job to do. I will be the local lead for a huge project. It's a tremendous responsibility. I can't afford to spend too much time enjoying Miguel, our cook's, creamy aubergine!"

"Inês, we'll be cut off from everyone in Scotland. I know you'll have to spend a lot of time at the site and in meetings. But if you don't get time to decompress then the level of tension will just grow and grow. You said it's 18 months. Maybe Amadeu, João, and Miguel could be persuaded to make sure you can properly relax."

"You want me to cuckold you." Suddenly, her voice was flat, all innuendo gone.

"Of course I do. I loved it when you cuckolded me with Chris and I'm hoping you'll agree to cuckold me again."

"I did not cuckold you with Chris. Chris and I had not broken up."

"It felt like it to me. You let me see you after he visited. You let me go down on you and lick up his cum. And if I remember, you not only came on my tongue, you teased me about licking up his black baby batter."

"I did, didn't I. That was cruel of me. I'm sorry."

"Cruel? It was lovely. It is a genuine sexual highlight for me -- and I hope it was for you! What do you think influences my novels?"

"What do you mean? You write crime stories, not romances."

"You haven't really been reading them, have you. There's always one character who looks like me. Redhead or blond, a bit weedy. And his wife cuckolds him to their great pleasure. It's never a main theme because you can't suddenly change genre: the readers don't like it. But I work something in each time."

"I'm not sure about this Len. I don't understand why you suddenly want this. And even if I wanted it I can't have it affect my career. But we'll have sex. I'll get the doctor to give me prescriptions for six Depo shots before I leave."

"Are you sure that's best? It can take a year for fertility to resume after that. It's just three months for the pill."

"Well you're very well informed about this for a male crime novelist. What gives?"

"Oh, you know. I told you I always have someone like me in each novel. I spent two days researching different types of contraceptives. It was so they could discuss choices in a scene. In that book he was very keen for her new lover to get her pregnant."

"Still waters run deep, don't they. I didn't know you still felt like this about licking out Chris's cum. But one thing you are right about is that I want a baby. Not right now but not so late that I can't fit a family in because I sold out to the company. I need to think it through."

* * *

Inês picked up the conversation in the middle of the night, after I'd got up for a piss.

"Anyway, why would any of the servants even want to bed me? I only spoke with them about how they run the house. I didn't ask if they were dating or anything."

"You said they live in rooms in the attic. Do you think they'd be living there if they were married with kids?"

"True. But it's all moot. It's just too unlikely."

"Well, you should decide on two things."

"What's that?"

"You should decide whether you're willing to have sex with any of them. If you are, you need to decide what kind of contraception you want to use. If you want to use any."

"Len Campbell! Are you suggesting that you'd be happy for me to get pregnant with their baby?"

"I don't want you to do anything you'd be uncomfortable with. But I'll support you completely if you choose to come home pregnant. It's your body so you're in charge."

"But you sort of want me to. Oh, I see that Little Len is answering for you. You do want me to."

I looked sheepish. Both because my body had spoken for me and because we named Little Len that way because it's so accurate. Inês married me because we get along really well, not because I can give her mind blowing sex. I try, of course. Especially with oral. But the chances were that Amadeu, João, and Miguel -- or any three men from anywhere -- would be better endowed than me.

There was something deeper, too. I had been putting the little cuckolding cameos into my novels for years as a kind of public statement. They always had relevance to the plot and the characters, so my editors didn't ask for changes there. But I knew that Inês reads my novels and she had either missed it or decided not to recognise it. I decided that she needed to make her own decision first.

But what I wanted was for Inês to speak for me and speak louder than I could. I'm a skinny, short, pale, red headed Scot. If her baby clearly had an African father then everyone would know. And Inês would be likely to continue cuckolding me. For me, that would be two huge wins.

* * *

At breakfast the next morning, Inês wanted more from me. And fair enough.

"Len, you've always been honest about how you enjoyed me 'cuckolding' you with Chris. Though I insist that it wasn't cuckolding. I can feel how much you want me to cuckold you on this new assignment. But I don't really understand it. Why? What is the attraction? We both know it was seen as a huge dishonour in the Middle Ages. What makes you different?"

This was a hard question to answer. I knew what I wanted but did I know why? Could I put it into words? I paused to think and put on the kettle.

"I think at least part of it is Little Len. When you let me clean you up after Chris had cum inside you you'd tell me what an incredible lover he was. He had the right tool, he knew how to use it and he came a lot. I don't think I can offer that but I have done my best to satisfy you sexually."

"You do, Len! You do a great job."

"I do an adequate job and maybe I reach the giddy heights of 'satisfactory' but I never go past them. And I'm not getting any younger. You haven't reached your sexual peak yet. I bet I have. So, I worry about sustaining our relationship."

"And you want to do that by having me cuckold you?"

"Inês, when the side window broke in last year's storm, I didn't try to fix it myself. I called a glazier. He had the tools for the job. I can do many other things but not that. We are householders but we don't attempt to do all the house things. And we're also married. You make me laugh, you share the same taste in trashy TV as me, and you let me offload when I get writers' block. I love you and I don't want you to decide that you have to leave me in a few years because I can't even 'satisfy' you anymore. So I want to find men who can take you past satisfaction and fulfil that part of what you need, so that the other part works."

"Wait, Len."

But I interrupted her.

"Wait, I haven't finished. That was about my fears. Now I need to tell you about my desires. I think you've always known to some extent. I always tried to put your pleasure first. And a part of that was self defence: I needed you to want to stay married to me. But there's another part. In that part of our relationship I need you to take the lead. I don't want to be an equal partner, I need you to be in command. I am sure I can come up with some kind of rationalisation. But would it be the truth or just something I made up to try and explain myself? I don't know for sure. I think this is deep inside me. A rationalisation would just be some vaguely plausible sounding words."

Silence.

"Have I said too much? Have I destroyed our marriage?"

Inês's tone was kind.

"No, Len. You haven't. You've been honest and made yourself vulnerable. Look. I can't make an instant decision on this. I need to have a bit of a think. We'll talk later."

* * *

Later wasn't that evening. It was two days later. I was bricking it. I sat at my desk and I couldn't write. I went for walks and I couldn't plan what to write. I tried listening to music or podcasts, watching a movie. I even tried reading novels, which I never do when writing. I couldn't do anything. No attention span. My stomach was in knots.

But then Inês sat me down for a chat.

"You know, Len, for someone who earns a decent living writing novels you could do a better job when it comes to communication. Four years of hints hidden in novels and quickly spoken phrases during love making. But you didn't have a plan. You just sort of hoped, didn't you?"

"Yes. That's a fair assessment. I am sorry. I must have shocked you and you deserve better. I..."

"Stop. This is my turn. I will talk and I'll let you know when you can speak. Finger on lips!" I didn't move. "Finger on lips. Really. I mean it."

I put my finger over my lips like a small child would when being disciplined by a teacher.

"Now, you did a bloody awful job of communicating until breakfast the other day. But when pushed, you spoke clearly and from the heart. I am glad you shared your fears about our marriage. I didn't see things like you but I can understand your perspective. You are right to want to protect it but your approach was sloppy and poorly executed."

She sighed and continued.

"But, I have to admit fault, too. I led you on with smutty innuendo about the servants. I can understand why you might have thought I was suggesting that we had three readymade bed partners who would fuck me ragged night after night. Fuck me full of cum that you wanted me to command you to clean up."

I started to rally inside. Inês wouldn't talk about sex like that if she wasn't seriously considering what I wanted. But I held my finger to my lips and continued to listen.

"So, this is my decision. I am now in command of our sexual relationship. You may make requests but we don't reach agreements; I give orders and you comply. Você entende?"

I took my finger from my lip to say that I understood and put it back.

"Good. So you understand that our relationship has a new dynamic; I think you will like it. Now, I don't have to cuckold you with Amadeu, João, and Miguel -- or anyone. But your point about or sex life being merely satisfactory was valid. I have not made a decision yet and won't until we get there but I have got a prescription for a year's supply of the pill. We will come back at Christmas and I can get more if we need. You may speak."

"Thank you. I am very sorry about how poorly I communicated. You are right. I fucked up and I'm sorry. I hope I can make it up to you. I will think hard and discuss ideas or problems with you properly in future. And thank you for taking command of our sex life."

"A satisfactory apology. Now, Little Len will be benched for a bit but Little Inês is going to take centre stage tonight. I will be giving some orders when we go to bed. You must follow them precisely."

* * *

It was so different from Scotland. Hot! I needed to stay out of the sun or my skin would go as red as my hair. Inês, on the other hand, was in her element. She spoke the language, loved the sun, and the team was doing a really good job getting the work on the bridge going.

I stayed inside and worked in a room I had turned into my office. Meanwhile, I could look out the window and see Amadeu looking after the garden and João working on the car. And Miguel did actually make several delicious aubergine dishes. In fact, with reminders to eat I was starting to put on weight, if not muscle.

We'd been there for a month and Inês had not cuckolded me yet. But our sex life was much improved. I was glad she had taken full control and I loved the orders she was giving. I also loved that I was being given orders. I made sure she knew that. Both because I wanted it to continue and I wanted to make sure I practised good communication.

So, I was delighted and surprised when we spoke in bed one night.

"I had a chat with Amadeu. I asked him if he was lonely living in the attic. He is and he's been single for over three years now. I think I know why he's single, too. He thinks hard but he's not very good at speaking to women. I think he's someone who struggles in social situations. But he's a sweet man and I think you'll agree that he's incredibly fit."

I nodded but was too afraid to open my mouth and say anything. I hoped I knew where this was going. But I was too scared it might end up going in a different direction than I hoped.

"Anyway, I told him that you couldn't satisfy me -- which is a little lie I hope you don't mind. I explained that I was all alone, away from our family and friends in Scotland. And I occasionally need some male company."

I nodded again. This time I was feeling better and I started grinning.

"So, you won't see him tomorrow."

I was shocked. Was this the twist in the tail that I had feared?

"I'm sending him into town to get a full set of STI tests. If the results all come back negative, I might send you out of the bedroom for an hour or two some nights. Or, if he's happy with it, I might let you watch."

"May I kiss you?"

We kissed.

"I want this to be good for you, you know. I was clumsy before. I mixed up fantasies with my fears about our marriage. But at heart, I really do want you to have mind blowingly good sex. I hope that sexual fulfilment from Amadeu, or anyone else you chose, will mean that my limited capacity can never be a sticking point for us. And also, while we're here, you have such huge responsibilities. You need some time when you're not thinking about budgets, logistics and work assignments."

"You're improving, Len. The words coming out of your mouth are starting to make more sense. Also, your close attention to my orders means that your oral ministrations are also much improved. And that is a good thing as you will be required in that capacity when Amadeu goes back upstairs."

"You are very kind."

"I don't know about that. But remember that this is all contingent. He has to come back with a clean bill of health. If he doesn't, he won't be leaving you a mess to clean up."

* * *

That first session was a huge success. Inês sent João and Miguel out to find a bar or a restaurant. I was kicked out of the room but was able to listen. It turns out that Little Amadeu isn't so little. In fact, Inês described him as a very tight fit. While I couldn't hear all the details, Inês's moans and cries carried. In fact, I went up into the attic and I could hear them there. I drew closer and stood in the room next door as I heard them approach climax. Just before the moment came, Inês yelled out in Portuguese. I don't speak it properly but given the context, I think she wanted him to cum inside her.

He left our bedroom a couple of minutes later and I heard my name being called.

I was given very explicit instructions on what to do and I followed them to the letter. I was overjoyed and Inês was clearly very happy, too. When I had cleaned her up to her satisfaction -- in fact more than satisfaction -- we spoke.

"This could work," she said. "He is a quiet man and has been lonely. I think this will be good for him as well as us."

"I am glad. I should tell you something, though. You were wise to send João and Miguel out. Your moans and cries were lovely to listen to and I could hear them all the way up in the attic."

"I don't think that will be a problem. Amadeu might be quiet but he's not made of stone. João and Miguel will find out when they have breakfast tomorrow, I expect. But you identified something important when we spoke before we left Scotland. I am approaching my sexual peak. But men hit their at around 18. Amadeu performed beautifully tonight. But could he keep up with me? I think I will need João, and Miguel, too."

I didn't say anything but I did grin. It's what I had hoped.

"And there's something else. You were right. Getting fucked like that is really refreshing. It stopped me worrying about work non-stop. You're a solid thinker. And I'll make a communicator of you yet. You can also expect solid grades on your oral. But some improvement is needed, so I will require you to do extra practise every night after school."

"Thank you, teach!"

* * *

João and Miguel's checks came back negative for everything, too.

Inês, ever the leader, created a schedule. She got to fuck each of them two nights a week, with Sunday off for a rest. And I was like a pig in muck. Because Inês was now much happier, I was becoming productive again. I was making good progress on my next novel when we had another talk.

"Do you know what this is?" She said, holding up a white cardboard box of her contraceptive pills.

"It's your pills."

"Yes and no. It's my last box of pills. Once I've finished this my fertility will return."

"Oh."

"Just 'Oh'. You're not going to add a comment?"

"My comments wouldn't be useful. This is an area where I have ceded all control to you. I am literally happy for you to make the choice that makes you happy. And, I have to admit that I'm a little scared to discuss it with you. I know that what I'd say is more driven by feeling than rational analysis."

"You are saying that you'd stay with me if I had a baby."

"Do you doubt it? Really?"

"But Len, our only sex is oral. If I get pregnant then there's no chance it's yours. I'm worried that if I get pregnant with a baby that couldn't be mistaken for yours then you'll be humiliated and our marriage will fail."