Butt Coin Ch. 02

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Warning!!!

Once again, this story takes place beyond space and time in a realm known as "Fiction" where all penises are bigger than average, there are no STD/STIs, and people have sex for a multitude of reasons that you might not agree with.

Just like with good anal sex, you shouldn't go into this story without first lubing up. It would be far less painful if you read the first chapter of Butt Coin, before you attempt to squeeze this story in.

Enjoy!

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By the time I left Maria's shop, I was a wreck. Not only was the jet lag killing me, but my balls and thighs ached from overuse. Also, my tongue was a little raw from when Maria made me go down on her, twice. Of course, the whole situation was a little fucked up, and there was this peculiar smell that seemed to be following me around as I walked home, but I wouldn't have changed anything.

Once I got home, I took a quick shower and promptly fell asleep until the next afternoon. For about a minute on Saturday, I entertained the idea of getting up and doing some work around my flat, but that quickly faded. Instead, I stayed up long enough to order and eat a takeaway, and I went straight back to sleep.

By the time Sunday morning rolled around I felt a lot better, but I was starving. Nearly everything in my refrigerator had gone off, plus I was out of coffee. I was about to cry, when I remember that I lived in London and there was a great café just across the street from my flat. So, I took a quick shower, threw on some sweats, and headed out.

The café was open and when I stepped inside, I was hit by the beautiful smell of unhealthy, greasy café food as it cooked. I had eaten at the café a couple times a week, since I moved to London eight years ago, so the staff knew me pretty well. They showed me to my usual seat and had me a black coffee in hand and a Full English Breakfast on the way before I knew it.

Two fried eggs, a pile of hash browns, a couple of sausages, and some beans later I almost felt human again. While I digested, and ordered another coffee, I took out my phone and started to think about everything I needed to do in the next week. I had a least a dozen projects that got pushed back because of my trip to South America, and that meant at least a dozen angry clients that I would have to deal with come Monday. I sighed and squeezed the bridge of my nose between my thumb and fore finger while I thought about the mess. When I opened my eyes again, from my seat in the café, I could just make out the front of Maria's shop.

My cock gave an uncharacteristic twinge in my grey sweatpants. For a second, I was worried that the waitress could spot my boner when she brought over my coffee, but if she did, she didn't let on.

Aside from reminding me of some of the best, and oddest, sex I've had in a long time, seeing the front of Maria's shop reminded me that I really needed to get my suits back, and that I really needed to talk to Sven about Butt Coin.

I checked my phone and texted the one number I had for Sven, but like it had for the last two months, the message simply bounced back and said that the number was no longer in service. It didn't help that I knew Sven was a privacy nut and he made it a point to scrub himself from the internet as often as some people showered. Hell, I didn't even have his email address.

I would have to go and physically track him down.

I paid my bill and walked down to the local high street in my neighbourhood. Sven lived nearby on a quiet, tree line street. Although he made a ton of money over the years, he didn't own is own home. Instead, he still rented the same room he had when he first moved to London all those years ago. The house was owned by an old Irish pensioner named Fiona.

I like Fiona, but she was a tough woman. She like to drink and loved to tell Sven and I stories about all the East End Mobsters she used to date back in the day. Sven took care of Fiona as much as she took care of him. Before I started to walk towards Fiona's house, I popped into a fancy liquor shop and bought Fiona a good bottle of Scotch, in case I needed to get her liquored up before she would tell me where Sven was hiding.

The walk to Fiona's house was pleasant. The sun was shining and from the open garage door of Fiona's neighbour, I could hear opera music playing.

I stepped up to Fiona's door, knocked, and waited.

Nothing.

I knocked again, this time a little louder, and I even used the fancy door knocker.

Still nothing. Fiona's house was silent.

I peeked through the stain glass panels on the door, to see if I could see anything. To my surprise there was a heap of fliers, letters, and magazines lying on the floor just inside the door.

Fiona hadn't been home in a while.

Partly out of worry that something had happened to Fiona, I headed next door to the neighbour's open garage. The garage was big, almost American sized, and the walls were all covered in racks of various tools. In the middle of the garage on a large makeshift table sat a large toy train set surrounded by a half painted miniature village.

I looked around but I couldn't see anyone. "Hello?" I said out loud over the opera music playing from a small radio placed near a miniature water tower on the table.

The detail of the tiny village caught my eye, so I leaned in to get a better look when suddenly from the doorway to the house, a little, bespectacled man wearing an old train conductor's hat walked into the garage carrying a cup of tea.

"Can I help you?" asked the little British man in a very polite way.

"Oh," I jumped up from looking at his tiny village. "Sorry. I'm looking for Fiona, from next door."

"Oh," he said in return as he clutched at his teacup.

"Sorry, this is fascinating," I said as I bent back down to look at his model village. "Did you do all this yourself?"

"Yes, I did," he beamed.

Ten minutes later, I knew his life story. His name was Gordon, he was a recently retired accountant and longtime miniature railway enthusiast. Him and his wife divorced years ago, over reasons he didn't go into, and he even made me a cup of tea.

"Forgive me Marty," Gordon eventually asked while he let me drive his miniature train through his half complete village. "Why did you stop by again?"

"Oh crap. Sorry. I completely forgot," I said. "I was wondering if you've seen your neighbour, Fiona. I'm friends with her lodger Sven, but I can't seem to find either one of them."

"Oh yes. Fiona," Gordon suddenly remembered. "I hadn't seen Sven in a good year, when out of the blue, I ran into him, right over there, just the other day."

"That sounds like Sven," I sighed. "He was in south America."

"Of course," Gordon nodded his head in understanding.

"Any idea when that was?" I asked.

"No more than a month ago," offered Gordon. "He said that him and Fiona were going on a trip."

"Any idea where?"

"Let me think," Gordon scratched his chin. "He said that he had a new idea that would make us all rich, and that him and Fiona were off to see...oh, to see his mother!"

"Sven's always up to something." I laughed, as suddenly the expression on Gordon's face changed.

"You know Sven?" boomed a woman with a thick Brazilian accent from behind me.

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It wasn't one woman, it was four, and for having the biggest breasts that I have ever seen outside of the internet, they all moved surprisingly quickly. Before Gordon and I even had time to protest, they grabbed us, tied our hands behind us, and sat us down on a pair of wooden chairs, before they pulled the garage door closed.

The ringleader of the group was a surprisingly tall Brazilian woman, who looked about fifty. She had a dark, almost mahogany coloured tan, with long black hair, and a bra cup size that easily stretched into the second half of the alphabet. She had strong powerful thighs, and a huge solid arse. Overall, of this, she wore a black stretch body suit that left very little to the imagination.

The muscle of the group were two women, who easily could have been twins with the same large breast, shoulder length dark hair, and wore matching pink tube tops. They looked like a slightly smaller version of the ringleader lady, just without the tan, and I would guess a couple years younger than her.

The last woman was the smallest and youngest of the group. She had dyed blonde hair, no tan, and almost regularly sized titties, as compared to her friends. And although it was a nice day for England, it must have been incredibly cold for the women from Brazil, for their nipples were all painfully erect.

"Where is Sven?" shouted the ringleader before she grabbed a pair of hedge clippers off the wall and struggled to unlatch the safety with her long fake fingernails.

"Are you alright Gordon?" I asked quickly.

Gordon didn't answer for he seemed oddly transfixed on the four women, so instead he just nodded his head up and down.

Eventually the ringleader, got the sheers open and came at me like a mad woman. "Where is Sven? Tell me where he is, or I'll chop your balls off!"

I racked my brain for a second trying to remember everything Sven told me about his fucking weird trip to south America, when it suddenly hit me. "Titiana?"

The ringleader woman jumped back, while her three friends all quickly grabbed weapons from Gordon's garage. The woman with the dyed blonde hair grabbed a wood saw off the table and shook it menacingly at Gordon at me. Of the twins, one grabbed a hammer from the wall while the other snatched up a broom.

"How you know who I am?" Titiana demanded.

"Sven told me about his trip to Brazil and he mentioned meeting a woman with enormous...," I paused a second, worried that I might offend the crazy woman threatening me with garden sheers, "...breast."

"What did he say?" she demanded and shook the garden sheers at me again.

"Sven said..." I was interrupted.

"Don't say his name," yelled the other twin with the broom before she spit on the floor of the garage.

"Oh, please don't do that," Gordon protested feebly next to me.

I started again. "He said that he met this lovely group of women while out in the jungle, and that you were dancers, and that you...," I pointed with my chin to Titiana standing in front of me. "He said that you had the nicest pair of breasts that he had ever seen."

"What else did he tell you?" Titiana demanded angerly which caused her enormous boobs to bounce up and down.

"He told me something about a tea ceremony," I offered, worried that I was giving away too much too fast. "He told me how you took him out in the jungle to your grandmother's house for the ceremony."

"What happened then!" she demanded as her nose flared.

"Sven, I mean he, said that he didn't remember what happened next and he woke up a couple weeks later in Peru."

The twins gasped, and then the four women started yelling at each other in Portuguese, which they spoke so fast and loud, I couldn't make out anything.

"Did he tell you about what happened to our tour bus?" demanded the youngest woman with the wood saw.

"No," I racked my brain, but I couldn't remember Sven saying anything about what happened to the bus. "No. I don't think so."

"He's lying," shouted the twin closest to me with the hammer.

"I'm not," I responded back. "Why? What happened with the bus?"

"Your friend stole our bus and set it on fire!" shouted the other twin with the broom.

"The day before, we just bought three months of oil for our shows and had it, along with everything else we owned, on the bus. When he set fire to our bus, we could see the flames leaping into the sky ten kilometres away," said the youngest girl.

"I'm so confused," Gordon said in a very polite way while still tied next to me. "Why were you storing flammable oil on a tour bus?"

"They are," I tried sugar coating it for the older man, "itinerate performers, who put on a traveling burlesque shows across the Amazon...."

"No," Titiana sneered. "We dance naked, none of that burlesque shit."

"Yes, um..., and Sven was their oil boy. His job was to make sure they were always well lubricated," I trailed off.

"Fascinating," said Gordon.

"Your damn friend burned down our tour bus, and now he owes us lots of money! Now tell us where he is!" yelled Titiana as she snapped the garden sheers closed.

"He owes me money too," I threw out.

"I don't care!" Titiana snapped before she lunged at me, grabbed me by the front of my sweatshirt and pulled me hard into her enormous boobs, which wasn't nearly as intimidating as she hoped it would be.

"I know where he is," offered Gordon meekly.

"Don't do it Gordon," I demanded. "Don't tell them what they want until they let us go. Never negotiate with terrorists!"

"Tell us!" shouted the young woman who grabbed Gordon by the front of his shirt and pulled him into her chest.

"Don't do it Gordon," I warned him, as I watched his glasses start to fog up while he was being smashed into the young woman's breast.

"But," whimper poor Gordon.

"Tell us old man, or we'll be forced to 'take care' of you," Titiana growled.

"Oh no," Gordon cried.

"Gordon! Stay strong. If you tell them, we'll lose any leverage we have," I warned him as I pulled at my bindings.

"We don't have time for this," Titiana growled. "Lulu, 'take care' of the old man."

"No!" I yelled, as I watched the young woman, set the wood saw down on the table, and then casually pop her lush boobs out of the top of her shirt.

"Fascinating," said Gordon as he strained to see Lulu's breast through his fogged-up glasses.

"That's not what I was expecting," I said as I looked at Titiana.

"What?" Titiana shrugged. "Did you think we were going to saw off his leg or something?"

"Kind of I guess," I said as I watched on.

Lulu began to strut around like the experienced dancer she was. She did I little spin and then threw a leg over Gordon's lap and pulled his head in between her big soft boobs. Then she reached up and took off his conductor's cap and put it on herself.

"Are you going to tell us?" Lulu cooed at Gordon.

Poor Gordon was grinning from ear to ear and was unable to answer.

Lulu shot Titiana a glance, and Titiana gave her the go ahead for whatever was next.

Deftly, Lulu shot her hand down between her and Gordon until she found poor Gordon's privates.

"No stop," whimpered Gordon.

"Are you going to tell us Papi," Lulu smile as she readjusted the conductors cap on her head.

"Of course," cried Gordon, "but first, have mercy, for I am an old man."

The four women shot each other a quick confused look. "What do you mean?" Titiana eventually asked.

"I'm an old man," Gordon whimpered again. "Can one of you please go get me a Viagra? They are in the medicine cabinet in the upstairs bathroom. And a glass of water, please."

"Is he serious?" Titiana asked me.

I just shrugged my shoulders, at the absurdity of it all.

"Vai!" Titiana yelled at the other twin.

The other twin leaned her broom against the table with the model on it, and then headed into Gordon's house.

"Go through his phone and see what we can learn," Titiana said to the twin guarding me.

The lady stepped up next to me. She was mid-height with shoulder length black hair, thick full lips, and had a pair of round G cup breast over which she wore a neon pink top.

The lady leaned over me, smashing my head into her boobs, before she began to rifle through my pockets.

"Hey," I let out a muffled cry as the lady found my phone and pulled it from my pocket.

"Got it," she said before she stood up and showed it to Titiana.

About the same time the other twin, returned carrying a little blue pill in her hand and a glass of water in the other.

Lulu, who was still standing topless next to Gordon, carefully plucked the little blue pill from her friend's hand and carefully leaned over and placed it in the old man's mouth. Then she took the glass of water and almost tenderly helped him drink it without spilling a drop.

"Where was I?" Gordon asked as he finished taking his dick medication. "Oh yes, I'll never tell you where Sven is. You'll have to torture me first," he grinned.

This cause both Titiana and me to roll our eyes.

Lulu began to gently rub one of her big nipples on the side of Gordon's face to help speed his medication along.

"Can you open his phone?" Titiana asked her friend.

"I'll never give you the code," I said, which sounded a little too dramatic.

Without even hesitating, the woman simply held up my phone to my face and it unlocked itself.

"Shit, I forgot about that," I kicked myself.

"Oh," Gordon moaned as Lulu slipped her hand down the front of his trousers.

"Meu Deau!" Lulu said in honest surprise as she pulled an unexpected monster from poor Gordon's shorts.

All four of the women, leaned in for a good look, and eventually so did I.

"Have you found anything?" Titiana asked her friend who was rifling through my phone.

"Here's the number," the woman showed Titiana Sven's number I had saved on my phone.

Titiana squinted at my phone for a second before she reached in between her boobs and pulled out a pair of reading glasses. She put them on and read the number off my phone. "No. That's the same number Sven gave us. Check his apps. Maybe he uses them to message Sven."

"Oh god," moaned Gordon next to me. The little blue pill had started to work its magic. Gordon's rather large and rather purple cock was now no longer limp as Lulu slowly worked his long shaft with her small hands.

"Now tell me Papi, where is the bad man?" Lulu cooed as she got down on her knees in front of Gordon.

"Don't tell them Gordon, not until they agree to release us," I demanded, knowing full well that the poor old man would tell them just about anything right now.

"Butt Coin?" the twin who stole my phone read out in confusion.

I tried to keep my face inscrutable, for that app was the one and only connection between Sven and myself I had on my phone, but it wasn't like his name was plastered on the app. Also, I wasn't sure why I was protecting Sven. After all he did take my money and ran away to another country.

"Wow," said the woman as she opened the Butt Coin app I had on my phone and began to look around before she showed Titiana.

"The world's first anal crypto currency," Titiana read out after she put back on her glasses. "What's this?" she demanded.

I struggled for a second, trying to think how much I should tell them. "Do you know what Bitcoin is?"

"Of course, I do," Titiana snapped. "Just because I'm Brazilian you think I don't know these things?"

"Of course not," I back tracked. "Butt Coin is like Bitcoin, but instead of using expensive computers to mine Bitcoins, it uses anal sex to mine Butt Coins."

All four of the women, including Lulu who was in the middle of giving poor Roger a tit job, nodded their heads in approval.

"And the best part," I continued, "there are these things call residuals. So, every time the Butt Coin is traded, the woman who made the Butt Coin, earns 9% on every trade."

"Every time?" questioned Titiana.

"Yes," I said.

"What if it trades 100 times?" she asked.

"Yes. Of course."

"How much are these Butt Coins worth?" asked Lulu as she continued to coax the information they wanted out of Gordon's balls.

"I made my first Butt Coin just two days ago, with this very nice lady down the street, and it immediately traded for £1500, and then traded three more times after that, before I passed out," I trailed off. "I'm not sure what it's trading at now, but you can find out on the app."

The twin with my phone began to frantically look through the app's menu before she screamed, "£2000!"

"O que?" Titiana yelled out before she pulled my phone from her friend's hands. "£2000? Who pays £2000 for this?"