Cabin Fever: Lovechild

Paul's heart, which had begun racing at the mere mention of Marcy's name, fell deathly still.

Karen chuckled at his catatonic shock.

"What? Don't tell me you're surprised?" she teased him. "I mean, you must've figured it was bound to happen sooner or later. You know what they're like...", she remarked, referring to Jeff and Marcy, who were typically pounding away like rabbits whenever they weren't screaming obscenities at each other.

Paul felt numb as he eventually left the table. Numb, cold and lost.

It had not even occurred to him that he might be the father. At the time, he simply accepted the story at face value:Jeff had gotten Marcy pregnant. As Karen noted, they had sex so often, the alternative barely warranted any consideration.

All of Paul's wild ambitions for another sexual encounter with Marcy abandoned him, like the last dead leaves being stripped from trees by the end-of-fall winds. Having a cheap affair with her behind Jeff's back was one thing; but now that Marcy was a mother, he felt like she was untouchable, morally speaking. Even his obsessive, burning lust for her couldn't drive Paul to risk driving a wedge between two parents-to-be.

But after the initial shock subsided, Paul was surprised to discover that he wasn't really disappointed that he wasn't going to sleep with Marcy ever again. If anything, he found it relaxing to suddenly be free of his obsession. The flashbacks of his sexual encounter with her stopped completely.

It was several days before the thought occurred to him that there was a chance, however slim, that the baby Marcy was carrying might've been his. He immediately brushed it off as a stupid thought. He had only fucked Marcy once and she and Jeff were prolific, to put it mildly. The odds of their little tryst being responsible must've been a thousand to one.

Besides, he didn't even know how far along Marcy was. She may have only been one or two months pregnant, which would rule him out completely.

Nonetheless, the thought began to gnaw at him, and soon became anxiety. In fact, it made him anxious enough to finally overcome his awkwardness and actually talk to Marcy for the first time since they had sex.

He spotted her going in to the campus library one afternoon and decided to 'bump into her' while she was doing some photocopying.

"Hey! Marcy!" he greeted her, trying to sound as if he was surprised to see her.

"Oh! Hey, Paul," Marcy replied. Her expression and tone were gentle, but Paul got the impression that she was a little frustrated that he was bothering her.

"How ya been?" he asked, regardless, hiding his racing nerves behind a broad, friendly smile.

"Good. Good," she nodded.

"Yeah? That's good," Paul reflexively responded.

"I heard a rumor that you were... uh..." he prompted, while making a timid, two-handed gesture towards her belly. By this stage, half the college was aware of Marcy's condition, so Paul knew he could safely broach the subject without betraying Karen's confidence.

Marcy stared at him with a raised eyebrow, giving him the same look of scathing pity that Karen used to give him in junior high, whenever he started acting like an awkward geek around her. Thankfully, it only took her a split second to understand what was going on.

"Oh!" she responded knowingly, "Right!

"Yeah, that's right.*Jeff* and I are going to have a baby." she calmly informed him. Paul received the message loud and clear. Yet Marcy's delivery was so brilliantly subtle, had anybody overheard her, they wouldn't have thought anything of the emphasis she put on Jeff's name.

"Great!" Paul gushed in delighted relief, "That's great! Well, I mean... It's notgreat, but, well... maybe it is? I don't know...

"How... how do you feel about it?" he asked, eventually reining his confused, awkward babbling into a coherent question.

Marcy sighed.

"Well, it's uh... It takes some time to get used to," she answered frankly. "I guess we're still adjusting to it.

"But we're doing okay," she concluded with a reassuring smile.

"Great," Paul grinned, mirroring her positivity.

"Well, look, if there's ever anything you guys need, just give me a call," he told her, only half-thinking about what he was saying. He was still reeling with his immense relief that he definitely wasn't the father. His brain was on autopilot, seeking the quickest polite route to the end of this awkward conversation.

"We will," Marcy cordially nodded. "Thanks."

They said their goodbyes and Paul cut a brisk pace straight back to his dorm room, where he whispered a prayer of thanks for the good news.

That was the last Paul thought of Marcy for a good long while. With her personal confirmation that the baby she was carrying wasn't his, it seemed like he was finally free to forget about her. Marcy's future was now firmly entwined with Jeff's, and whatever it might be, it did not involve Paul. As delicious as his memories of their careless, passionate evening together may have been, it was an experience he would never get to relive. So why dwell on it?

He went home for Christmas and enjoyed the peace of mind that the season brought. Some strange looks from some of his extended family made him wonder at times if he was laying the good cheer on too thick. But Paul couldn't help but be happy.

Paul returned to college to find that Marcy had developed a distinct baby bump over the holiday break.

The moment he laid eyes upon that subtle curve, he knew.

He knew that it was his.

To hell with Marcy's unflinching assurance, and the hard, indifferent laws of probability! Paul knew! He could feel it in his bones; in the depths of his gut and beyond, that he had gotten Marcy pregnant.

And just like that, Paul once again found himself overcome with a vision of their impulsive tryst.

Except this vision was different from the ones that had tormented him throughout much of the fall. This vision was calm, clear and coherent.

The bustling sights and sounds of the college morning faded into nothingness. The sight of the gentle bulge in Marcy's belly segued seamlessly into a vivid memory of Marcy straddling him. She arched her head back, as his manly vigor thundered up into her tender womb. He could hear her hot, wanton breath panting. He could see her face, flushed with orgasmic exhaustion, as she tipped her head forward once more. Her eyes were closed. Her soft, pink lips were parted as she gasped for breath. He watched as her long, dark brown hair tumbled over her right shoulder and on to her naked breast.

He knew, beyond all doubt, that in that absolutely perfect moment, Marcy's baby had been conceived.

For weeks, his recollection of his casual fuck with Marcy had been fragmented and confused, almost like a corrupted video file. He had begun to doubt everything he thought he remembered about that night.

But seeing Marcy's pregnancy with his own eyes had finally made it all real for Paul. He really had cum inside her! The proof was right in front of him! Now, there were no more gaps in the memory; no more confusion. Every facet of detail; every sight, sound, smell and sensation was present and authentic.

In his stupor, his books slipped out of his hand and clattered to the pavement.

His body was hot with excitement. Yet unlike his previous flashbacks, this time he didn't get an involuntary erection. In fact, he didn't really feel horny at all; he felt blessed. He felt exactly the same as he had in those minutes immediately after he and Marcy had finished having sex. It was that same sense of profound contentment; that same innate pride in having done what he, as a man, was born to do.

By the time Paul finally snapped out of his musings, Marcy was long gone. He wasn't too disappointed. He would be seeing her again.

He gathered up his books and leisurely strolled back to his dormitory. He had a class that morning, but he decided to skip it. Instead, he was going to climb back into bed and jerk off.

He pleasured himself patiently and enthusiastically, as he relived that steamy evening with Marcy. He saw her large breasts heaving majestically. He saw her long, beautiful hair swaying to and fro as she bucked with such determination. He felt the hot embrace of her sweet pussy massaging his erogenous shaft.

Of course, when he eventually came into his clenched fist, it was a poor substitute for the real thing. Nonetheless, it was by far the most satisfying climax he'd had since being with Marcy.

It would not be the last time he pleasured himself to that memory, either.

The heavy responsibility of having accidentally fathered a child had not escaped him, though. Once he had cleaned up the mess he'd made in bed, Paul practically had a panic attack while he began to consider the long term implications of Marcy's pregnancy.

He didn't know what to think.

As much as the thought of being a dad and having to care for a baby terrified him, he found the idea of shirking his responsibility to Marcy and his child even less palatable.

But on the other hand, Marcy had given him a very clear signal that she didn't want him to get involved. She seemed thoroughly committed to the lie that Jeff was the baby's father. Hell, maybe she wasn't even willing to admit to herself that she had gotten pregnant from a careless, one-time affair.

Paul could hardly blame her. Having a baby with her long term boyfriend made for a much less scandalous story than the truth. She was already deeply involved with Jeff; he was there to support her, from the very beginning. Not to mention that Jeff's family was quite well off. The kid was better off being born into a family like that, rather than to a middle-class college kid like himself, who hadn't even broken into the job market yet.

Part of him desperately wanted to talk to Marcy about what was happening. But in the end, he decided it was probably less selfish to simply leave her be. Marcy had apparently settled into a comfortable arrangement. If Paul started interfering with that, he could end up causing her a great deal of trouble and perhaps even set his child up for a difficult start in life. He didn't want to risk causing that sort of pain for either of them.

The weeks rolled on. Every time Paul saw Marcy, her belly was more magnificent than the time before. He began to relish catching sight of her around the campus. He would stare into that fruitful bulge and always be drawn back into the memory of the precise moment it was seeded.

Marcy had grown into a perfect living monument to that wonderful moment. Every curve of her changing body was a testament to that hurricane of hot, natural passion they had both been swept into. Paul could hardly stop thinking about her.

He began amusing himself with an outlandish fantasy of actually marrying Marcy and spending the remainder of his life having a family with her and their lovechild. He often envisioned himself standing at the front of a bright, cream-toned chapel, facing her. Her elegant wedding gown did justice to her breathtaking natural beauty. The sphere of her immense belly was covered with its intricate, lacy embroidery. The neckline was almost exhibitionistic, showing off a canyon of cleavage between her enlarged pregnancy breasts, for all to see.

She wore an expression that was patient and humorless. Much like himself, his shotgun bride was accepting of this unintended new course in her life, though she was hardly thrilled by it. Her firm, yet demure hazel eyes stared right into his soul, shimmering just has they had when she seduced him all those months ago. Their gaze was so characteristic of Marcy: captivating, yet intimidating in its intensity. It gave him a silent ultimatum: "Iwill hold you to the promise you make here."

On occasion, Paul would envision the scene when they were middle-aged. He pictured them groaning wearily as they roused from their messy double bed for yet another dreary day at the rat races, to feed their expanded brood of two, three, or four children.

Even in his fantasies, Paul knew there would never be any love between he and Marcy; no giddy tingles of romance. Yet he could easily imagine himself watching the mother of his children lumber drowsily around their bed, her hair a mess, her practical nightwear wrinkled, and being pleased with what he saw.

They would be partners, not sweethearts; cooperating amicably in their common responsibility to raise their children healthy. Of course, they would also tend to each other's sexual needs.

Six months earlier, the prospect of such a humdrum, ordinary future would've made Paul's stomach sink.

But after getting Marcy pregnant, he suddenly found the idea more than a little tempting.

Cumming inside her had been the most perfect experience of his entire life. So perfect, in fact, that he could genuinely see himself building the remainder of his life in its echo, without any regrets. That one blissful memory of what it was to be an uninhibited, virile male could sustain him for a lifetime, if he surrounded himself with reminders of it.

But of course, they were just idle fantasies. Marcy was going to raise their baby with Jeff. They'd probably get married soon enough, too.

Paul mightn't have been foolhardy enough to get down on one knee in front of Marcy and pop the question, but as her baby bump grew, he became more and more restless with being completely cut out of the situation. He wasn't certain what he needed, exactly. But he knew he had to talk to Marcy about what was going on.

Perhaps more than anything else, he needed to hear her admit that he was the father.

He pursued her across the small quad one chilly afternoon and cornered her in the entrance hall of the campus' East Building. He had to call out her name three times before she finally stopped.

"Hey, Paul! How's it going?" she greeted with a smile. The mask of good cheer she tried to wear could not conceal the frazzled nerves beneath.

"Hey..." Paul timidly replied. "Marcy, do you, uh..."

He stalled for a moment and quickly came to regret not having a plan for what he wanted to say to her. Marcy feigned patience, but Paul could see the apprehension in her eyes.

"Do you remember that conversation we had in the library, just before Christmas? We were talking about... new arrivals? And, like... how one of the classes might be getting a new teacher?" he phrased his question discreetly. "Do you...

"Do you think it could be mine?" his voice cracked.

Marcy sighed and flexed her lips. She stared at him with serious, yet sympathetic eyes and began to shake her head while she figured out how she would respond. But after a couple seconds, the gesture weakened and soon stopped, as if she was too tired to keep it up any longer.

"Maybe," she acknowledged quietly.

Oddly enough, her response actually calmed Paul's tense heartrate. He was elated to hear the admission from her own mouth.

"Okay," he nodded absently in response.

The multitude of complications that came with Marcy acknowledging he could be father, and the immense impact those complications would likely have upon his future, had not escaped him. He filed them all away in an archive box in the back of his mind. He would definitely freak out about them, and give each and every one of them the consideration they deserved, in the near future.

But for now, Paul didn't feel weighed down by any of those problems. His normally overactive mind went unusually quiet, and a reassuring sense of peace came over him.

This was the closest he had been to Marcy since the holiday break. It felt good to be so close to her; it felt right. He and Marcy meant to be here, right now, standing before one another, having this conversation. From the moment they chose to sleep together all those months ago, they had been destined to end up here.

"So..." Paul continued, after a brief silence. He had no idea what to say to Marcy next, but they obviously had things they needed to talk about.

"Say, are you any good with cars?" Marcy suddenly interrupted.

"Uh... cars?" Paul repeated in confusion. "Uh, a little, I guess. But not..."

"I've been having a lot of trouble starting mine the past couple days," she interrupted again. "Could you maybe come out and take a look at it? It won't take long," she promised. She had composed herself remarkably well. The other people weaving here and there around them would've been utterly oblivious to the tension surging between her and Paul.

"Oh! Um, yeah, sure! I'll do what I can!" Paul agreed, having taken the hint.

He followed Marcy out into the parking lot and over to her well-kept second-hand Chevy. He instinctively headed over towards the passenger door, but Marcy beckoned him over to the driver's side.

"How are you going to check the engine from there?" she cleverly pointed out.

"Right," Paul sheepishly agreed. "Sorry. Force of habit."

They traded places; Marcy got in the passenger seat, Paul, the driver's. They closed their doors almost simultaneously.

Neither of them looked at the other. They both stared straight ahead.

Paul said nothing. He waited for Marcy to take the lead.

"Look, Paul..." she began with a sigh, "Maybe you should just forget about it.

"Iwant you to forget about it," she insisted.

Paul looked over at her, but she wouldn't meet his gaze. He didn't know how to feel about her request. He struggled to take it seriously. It wasn't so much that he felt like her suggestion was unreasonable; more like it was impossible.

"Look, we made a stupid mistake. It happens," she shrugged. "But even if that was how I got pregnant - and that's abig 'if'! It probably wasn't!"

Paul could tell that she was lying. Marcy believed that the baby was most likely his. She'd done a perfect job of hiding that suspicion from him when he confronted her in the library, before Christmas. But somehow, this time she just wasn't able to sell the charade, even though she tried very hard to do so.

"...What's done is done," she continued.

"The past is in the past. All that really matters is what's happening now.

"I'm having a baby. With Jeff. And if things were more complicated than that..." she trailed off, just as a quiver of apprehension began to trickle into her voice. "Well, I guess that's the point isn't it? Why make things complicated when they don't need to be?"

Paul didn't respond. He still had no idea what to say, or even what hewanted to say. He completely sympathized with Marcy's dilemma. But he doubted that he was capable of pretending that he wasn't the father of their baby, for the rest of his life, as Marcy was proposing. That child, and the intimate act that had created it, would define him from now on. He struggled to imagine how he could spend his future pretending that none of it had ever happened.

Marcy turned to face him for the first time since they'd gotten in the car. She was probably concerned about the growing silence.

This time, it was Paul who failed to meether gaze.

"I don't hold you responsible," she told him earnestly, as she placed her hand upon his and gave it a gentle, comforting squeeze. "You don't have anything to prove.

"It's sweet that you care, it really is. But everything's fine. It doesn't make any sense to turn your life upside down, just because of one silly little mistake.

"You've got a great life ahead of you," she continued after a brief pause. "I hear you've got some great career opportunities opening up for you. And Karen... I hear there might be some sparks going on there?"

It seemed like a lifetime ago, but Paul had once doted on Karen like crazy. Always wanting to date her, but never being able to pluck up the nerve to ask. However, ever since he had slept with Marcy, Karen had barely been in his thoughts at all.