Caddy for Hire

"Okay, then. Do you want to ride with me or follow me there?"

"I suppose that depends on the direction we're going in," Renee replied in a rather sweet kind of way, something else Marc liked just as much.

He made a suggestion, and because going there would require him to bring her back the 'wrong' way from her house, she opted to follow him. But she no sooner got in her car that she found herself wishing she'd made a different decision.

When she realized the reason she felt that way, she told herself to 'get a grip'. When some other part of her brain tried to argue, she reminded it that very attractive, 26 year-old men didn't date 40-year old women.

"Not even 40-year old women who still looked good--for their age," she reminded herself yet again.

"Especially once they find out that older woman has a child," she thought before dropping it.

Marc turned onto Middleburg Drive and as Renee followed, she saw Band Boys Cafe just ahead. She'd been there once before and really enjoyed it. They offered both indoor and outdoor seating, and she didn't really care which one Marc preferred.

"In or out?" he asked after opening her door for her and helping her out.

Before answering she looked at the door then said, "Aren't I the one who's supposed to do stuff like that for you?"

Marc laughed then told her if she ever did open his door he'd fire her.

That made her laugh and promise she never would.

"You might be my caddy who carries my golf clubs, but to me, anyway, you're a woman first everywhere off the golf course."

What he said came across neither as condescending nor offensive. It was actually a refreshing breath of fresh air in a world where many men no longer treated women differently. And who could blame them after 60 years of being told women are no different than men or that women didn't need men except as...sperm donors.

As she was still thinking about what he said, they reached the entrance where he opened that door, too, then told her, "And I hope it's okay, especially after this morning, if I tell you you really are a very attractive woman."

She stepped inside, let him catch up then said rather sweetly, "I don't mind at all. And thank you for saying that."

A perky young girl of maybe 17 or so welcomed them and asked if they'd be dining inside or out. She looked at Renee for the answer, but she just looked at Marc.

"We've been outside for hours. Do you mind if we eat inside?"

She then turned back to the hostess and said, "We'll be eating in."

Marc helped her with her chair, another unexpected surprise, and the two of them started looking over the menu.

"Anything look good?" he asked her as they continued scanning.

"Actually, everything looks good!"

"I'm starving," Marc admitted. "I want a sandwich but can't decide which one. All of them are making my mouth water."

"I haven't had corned beef in forever," Renee mused as something called The New Yorker caught her eye.

"Oh, yeah. That looks great. Two New Yorkers?"

"Please!"

Marc ordered for them both, and as they waited for their food he spoke first.

"I can't tell you how glad I am to have found you."

"Oh, gosh. I can't you how glad I am that you did," she told him with all sincerity.

"You were on the tour. Do you miss it?" he asked her.

"Yes and no. I love golf, and were I good enough to make a living at it, I'd still be out there. But I was only an average player, and while I did make a little money, it was never anything significant."

"Just making the tour means you're a lot better than average," Marc said in a friendly way.

"True. But among those on the tour, I was average, at best," she said correcting him but in that polite, pleasant way he found charming.

Marc sighed then told her she was right before saying, "That's me, too."

"Wait. You haven't been on the tour long enough to say that," Renee countered with a little laugh as their meals came, the corned beef piled high with melted Swiss cheese on marble rye buns.

"Fair enough, but I see these guys play, and I gotta tell you, I'm in awe."

"Marc? You made more money in your first cash than I did my first four years on the tour. I've seen a ton of players come and go, and you're not giving yourself nearly enough credit."

He took a monster sized bite while she spoke and was still chewing. When enough of it was gone to allow him to talk he replied.

"It certainly helps to have someone who believes in you."

He looked right at her, and the way he said it made her feel warm all over.

"What about your family? Your brother's been your caddy since day one, right?"

"He has. Tyler's a great guy, and he knows golf. I mean, he lives and breathes it. But his head isn't always exactly in the game."

"I'd ask what you mean but that's none of my business," Renee said before taking a small first bite of her own.

"No, it's okay. Tyler is well, Tyler tends to be...all about Tyler. Don't get me wrong. I love my brother to death. It's just that we're such different people."

"May I ask, 'How so'?"

"Renee? You can ask me anything," he told her before taking another manly-sized bite.

Again, he started speaking before he finished chewing, but that's just what guys did, and it didn't bother Renee in the least. She was thoroughly enjoying the company and the food.

"That's tough. I know why I say that, but telling someone else feels...."

"Disloyal?" she offered, feeling bad for prying.

"I was gonna say 'wrong' but maybe that's true, too. At any rate I'll just say that altruism isn't in my brother's vocabulary. Not to get into politics, but we're both Libertarians, and Libertarians aren't exactly known for our altruism."

Renee kind of tilted her head, smiled again then said, "Something tells me you're the exception to the rule."

Marc lowered his head a little in modesty then told her he hoped that was true.

Now unsure of whether or not she should say anything else, Renee just took another bite and chewed.

"May I ask you something?"

She finished the bite then told him what he'd told her.

"Sure. Anything."

"You um, you mentioned losing your husband. I really am sorry that happened, Renee. Do you mind telling me how or when?"

For the first time since she lost the only man she'd ever loved, Renee didn't choke up when she spoke of her late husband. She quietly explained what happened, how long ago it had been, and that it had been far more difficult that she could have imagined.

"I'm uh, I'm not a very...religious person," Marc began. "But I am aware of how short life is and that it, or the life of someone we love, can be taken away in an instant. I think that awareness is a kind of driving influence in my life."

"No pun intended, right?" Renee teased.

It took him a second to get the reference to 'driving', but that, her smile, and the pleasant way she said it made him laugh.

"I really am glad I...we...found each other."

Again, his words made her feel flushed, and the realization that she could possibly have feelings for this younger man caused her to look down at her food rather than run the risk of her facial expression giving him any hint as to what she was thinking.

"This is really good," she said before picking the partly eaten first half of the sandwich back up.

Marc was well into the second half of his and told her he agreed.

"The company's really good, too," he told her with a smile.

Without looking at him Renee said, "Yes. Yes it is."

As he sipped his iced tea, or 'sweet tea' as any respectable southerner called it, Renee asked him what was next.

"Another 18 holes tomorrow," he told her.

"Same time?"

"Same time. Same place."

They talked golf until she was finished, and when it was time to leave, Renee planned to pay for her meal, but Marc wouldn't have it.

"Uh-uh. No way. Never. When I invite a woman to go anywhere with me, she's not paying," he told her as he handed $25 to their server to cover the meal plus 15%.

"Okay," she replied somewhat quietly before thanking him for lunch.

"And for the job. And for the company."

They were getting up as she said that, and Marc told her, "The pleasure was all mine. In every respect."

He again opened her doors, and as she got in her car, she found herself going back to the same thing that had bothered her on the drive over. How could she possibly have feelings for him? Or for anyone she'd just met, for that matter? But especially someone who was 14 years younger than her? And not just him but also...why now?

As she drove home she told herself not to be so harsh.

"You've never had feelings for anyone but Don since the day you met him," she told herself as she tried to sort through her jumbled emotions.

Marc was definitely handsome, but perhaps more importantly, he'd hired her when she was getting close to being desperate for work. Or was it more that he'd been so nice to her? Perhaps it was how he'd been so thoughtful and understanding when it came to losing her husband. As she pulled into the driveway she thought it was probably a combination of all those things and that was it. There just wasn't anything more to it.

She no sooner opened the door than all her worries melted away as Lexi came running and calling her name.

"Mommy's home!" she heard her daughter call out as the garage door to the house opened.

"Hey, sweet pea! How was your day?"

"Fine! We played Simon Says in school and me and Grandma made cookies!"

"You mean Grandma and I, right?" her mom only partly teased as she hoisted her daughter up and gave her a hug.

"Yes. Grandma and I made cookies. Wanna see?"

"I wanna EAT them. And YOU!" her mom said, showing her teeth like the Big, Bad Wolf.

Lexi laughed and screamed in joy as they headed to smell of freshly baked cookies.

"Hey, Mom!" Renee said as she set her daughter down.

"Hi, honey! How'd it go?"

She picked up a still-warm cookie, took a little bite, and went, "Mmmm. It uh, it went as great as these cookies taste."

Her mother smiled then said, "Really? Tell me everything!"

Lexi had no interest in golf, and she was too young to worry about money and bills and jobs, so a cookie and a glass of milk made her happy as she went off by herself.

Renee and her mom had always been close, but since Don's passing, they'd become more like sisters who were best friends than mother-daughter.

She started with the golfing side of things from the moment she saw Marc until they finished the 18th hole then moved on to more personal stuff like their conversation at the restaurant. Her mom listened, something she always did, and never interrupted unless she needed clarification.

"So I suppose it's just...everything all at once, you know?" Renee said, summing up her previous mental conversation the best she could.

"You're probably right, honey," she told her daughter. "There hasn't been anyone in your life but Don for...ever. So even a younger or...much-younger man...who hires you to do what you love and who's polite and kind and evidently very handsome...who wouldn't enjoy that kind of attention?"

Renee and her mom had sat down at the kitchen table, but after hearing those words, Renee got up and gave her mom a hug.

"You are the smartest person I know, Mom."

Her mother hugged her back then laughed.

"You sure weren't saying that when you were 14 or 15."

Renee laughed, too, because her mom was right. Like so many other teenagers, Renee thought she knew far more than either of her parents, and it took another 5-7 years for her mom to 'catch up' in terms of intelligence. Shortly after getting married, she realized her mom had always been the smarter of the two and still was.

"Renee?"

Her daughter sat back down without answering and just listened.

"Just be careful, okay?"

Her mother didn't need to elaborate. She wasn't being 'bossy'. She was just being a friend, and friends looked out for one another. In this case, a 40-year old woman who had just become aware of how lonely she was, and who was now working directly with a very attractive man--of any age--could easily make a serious mistake that might well end in heartbreak.

Renee had never been, and even now still wasn't, the kind of woman who 'hooked up'. That might work well for a lot of other people in her situation, but it would never be okay for her. So any future romance she would ever consider entering into could well lead to something serious, and having a daughter, she needed to be very careful.

"I will, Mom," she promised before again putting Marc Hardison out of her mind--again.

At least until the 1st tee the following morning.

This time, Renee had her boss's clubs with her and was waiting for him. He smiled at her and waved the moment he saw her, and Renee, who felt her pulse quicken waved back, as she returned the smile.

She was wearing a powder blue shirt, dark blue shorts, and the same white visor and shoes. The visor and shoes weren't the same, but to Marc they looked like they were. The only real difference was that her hair was in a regular ponytail held in place with a scrunchie.

"Where's my caddy?" Marc asked very seriously.

Renee shook her head real quick making Marc laugh.

"Yeah, I came out expecting my caddy and there's a model on the first tee."

"Ha! Yeah, right!" Renee said as though that was pure nonsense. But if it was, why did the feelings she'd tried so hard to stifle come back with a vengeance?

As he warmed up Renee asked if he ever golfed anywhere else in town.

"I do. It's just that this is the only course I can play for free."

"Oh, right. I uh, I did notice your smiling face in the on the poster in the clubhouse."

He chuckled then told her that was all there was to it.

"I worked at here when I was in high school, and they let me golf for free as compensation. Now they use my face and name, and I still play for free."

"Marc? They really should be paying you for that," she suggested in the nicest way possible.

"Maybe someday. If I ever win a tournament," he replied in his typically modest way.

He reached for driver which Renee had ready, and she said, "You will. It's just a matter of time."

"Well, if I don't qualify next Monday, it's going to be an even longer wait."

He pushed in the tee then said, "For now, I'd settle for just cashing again."

Renee wanted to give him a pep talk, but she realized he didn't need it. Marc didn't lack confidence, he was just modest. And she liked modesty in men. Especially ones as handsome as Marc who could easily be...a pompous ass...and probably mostly get away with it.

Several hours and 18 holes later, he finished eight under for the day and couldn't stop talking about how much of a help Renee had been.

"I knew caddies were supposed to be a second set of eyes, but you're amazing."

"I appreciate that, Marc, but I feel like there's still so much to learn and do. I do know golf, but playing and caddying are two very different things. I'm just happy to at least not be hurting your game."

"Hurting? Are you serious?" he told her as he stopped walking then faced her when she stopped, too.

"I just mean I don't have all that much experience caddying, and I could easily cost you several strokes on the course during a tournament when it counts."

He moved a little closer, and Renee's heart began beating a little faster. When he gently touched her lower arm, she felt a jolt of something pass through her body, as no other man but her husband had touched her that way in so long she'd forgotten what it was like.

"I probably shouldn't say this, but I'm just happy to have you...."

He stopped in mid-sentence then said something other than what he wanted to say.

"As my caddy."

"Oh. I...I'm happy to be...your caddy," she told him, feeling certain there was something more he wanted to say. But he didn't and that realization brought those same doubts and negative feelings back again, and this time they were just as strong as before.

"I uh, I should probably get going," Marc said as he kind of turned toward the clubhouse.

"Right. Um...me, too," Renee said, sensing the tension between them but misreading the reason for it completely.

"So uh, thanks again. For everything," he told her as he opened the door for her.

"Sure. My pleasure," she replied, forcing a smile.

She turned to walk away when he called her name. She stopped, turned around, and said, "Yes?"

Again, she knew he wanted to say something but didn't.

"That's okay. It...it wasn't important. Have a nice evening, okay?"

"You, too," she said as she turned back around.

But after two steps she stopped and turned back the other way yet again.

"Marc?"

He'd never moved and was staring at her. She startled him, and that told her he'd been looking at her, and that knowledge emboldened her as she smiled again.

"Would you maybe like to join Lexi and me for dinner?"

Of all the crazy thoughts she could have, she thought about how the proper grammar in this situation was 'Lexi and me' because they weren't the subject of the sentence. A huge smile broke out on his face, answering her question and causing her to give up on grammar in favor of something more interesting.

"I...I'd love to. Yes. Definitely!" he said, utterly surprised at the offer. "Just let me know when."

"Great. Um...is seven okay?"

"Tonight?" he asked, hoping that's what she meant but causing Renee to assume she'd pushed too hard.

"Oh. If that doesn't work for you, or if you had plans, it could be some other time," she told him, speaking faster than normal.

"No. Tonight is perfect," he told her. "I'll see you then."

She knew he didn't know where she lived and tried not to laugh.

"Do you need my address?" she asked rather sweetly as she walked back toward him.

"Oh. Duh. Yeah, that might help, huh?" he told her a little sheepishly as she got out her phone.

"There you go," she said, texting it to his number which he'd shared with her the first time they talked.

"Got it," he told her as he looked at his phone. "I'll uh, I'll see you tonight. At...seven."

"I'm looking forward to it," she said, feeling like she was 16 again after asking a cute boy to the Sadi Hawkins dance at school and hearing him say 'yes'.

Renee was a pretty decent cook, and when Don was alive she loved making dinners for them, especially once Lexi was old enough to eat. Sadly, their little girl didn't have a lot of those meals with her father, and Renee tried not to think about that too much as she wondered what to make.

The excitement she was experiencing came to a screeching halt when she realized she didn't know whether or not Marc ate meat. Or even fish. There was a time when people wouldn't even think of asking such a thing, but she personally knew people who wore their veganism on their sleeves like a badge of honor.

"So just call him," she thought as she said 'duh' to herself.

Renee enjoyed talking to people, but the truth was, she preferred texts, so she began pecking at the keyboard on her phone.

Marc replied within seconds, and just seeing his words made her happy.

"I'll eat anything!"

It was quickly followed by, "Except for slimy spinach and stewed tomatoes. Not wild about okra, either."

He put a 'barf' emoji after them, and that made her laugh.

"No slimy vegetables. Got it!" she wrote back, aware that she was feeling better than she had since that most horrible of days.

She really wanted to make a sheet-pan Paella with shrimp and chorizo, but it had cooked peppers in it, and that was too close for comfort. So she went with her second choice of Prosciutto-wrapped chicken with lemon orzo and peas. It had been well over three years since she'd made either of them, and her mouth was watering just thinking about it.

But as she got to work on it, she had another panic attack.