Cadences: Cadence's Sheets (Second Cadence)

They're so different though, that sometimes I wonder if they grew up in the same house. Andrea could meet someone and immediately make friends with them, making them love her in an instant. Drew wasn't like that at all. It takes a him a while to open up to someone, and even then he wouldn't be completely himself when he's with them. Not like he is with me. I've never seen him smile like he does when he's with me. Never heard him laugh with his friends, or share something personal. It makes me sad. And many times I wondered if something big had happened to him when he was younger, something that caused him to be so reserved and wary of other people.

I text my mother back, letting her know I'm five minutes away as I see my building peaking through the trees lining up the street were on.

**********

I arrive at my building and walk up the steps, rummaging through my bag for my house keys, then I realize I won't need them since our house is probably packed with people. The elevator doors open and I step in, mentally preparing my self for the madness that's surely going to be in my house. I heard Charlie's army buddies are coming and whenever they're around, chaos is guaranteed.

A hand shoots out and stops the doors from closing and I look up to find my favorite pair of blue eyes staring back at me. I smile widely.

His smile is a shy one but his eyes are full of mirth. I jump on him as soon as he steps in, which causes him fall back a step and I hear his chuckle against my ear. But he doesn't return the hug, he doesn't squeeze me like he always does. He gently but firmly removes my hands from around his neck and takes a step back.

I suddenly feel embarrassed which is not something I ever felt around him. I straighten my clothes and look at the floor.

"How've you been?" He asks quietly, as the elevator starts ascending.

"I've been good. How was your trip?" I ask, mostly just to avoid further awkwardness.

"It was fine, a bit boring though" he answers.

"I missed you" I blurt out. I look up at him to see his reaction.

He's looking at the floor, so I can't tell for sure but he looks pained.

"Cadence..." He sighs.

"What?" I ask sharply. I turn around and press the button to stop the elevator. When I face him again he looks a little panicked, as if the idea of being stuck with me in such a confined space scares the hell out of him. "What? Am I not allowed to say that?" I hiss.

"What is happening to us Drew? I don't want us to change because of what happened."

"We're not changing" he says firmly, finally returning my glare with his own.

"Oh really? Then what was that hug, Drew? You didn't even put you arms around me, I've seen beavers give more passionate hugs than that." I say, "and am I not allowed to miss you now? Is this going to be like the cold, distant relationship I have with my mother? Or worse yet, the indifferent, blasé, zero-chemistry relationship that you have with her?"

His eyes flare with anger, "No," he says hoarsely, "of course it's not going to be like that. I won't let that happen. I just need some time to...readjust. To be able to be around you again without feeling like I might do something I shouldn't do." He answers quietly.

'But I don't want you to do that' I want to yell at him. But I don't. I just sigh heavily and shake my head. I press the button and the elevator resumes its ascension.

The elevator doors open and I start to step out when Drew grabs my wrist making me halt at the doors. I wait for him to say something but I don't look back.

"Please don't be mad, I can't stand it when you're mad at me." He says, his voice desperate in a way that cracks my heart.

My breath catches and I look over my shoulder at him long enough to say: "I'm not mad at you, Drew. I'm just sad, and really, really tired." I say, and then I make my way to our apartment, I open the door and step in. But not before I hear him whisper: "that's even worse" behind me.

***********

As expected, our house is full of people. Some I recognize as Charlie's relatives and friends, even some of my mother's clients, others I've never seen before. I go straight to my bedroom to change before my mother catches me, thanking God I'd already showered after practice, a few more minutes and mom would've killed me for not being here on time.

In my room, I quickly change into a white high-waisted skirt and a black crop top that reveals a thin slit of my stomach, letting my hair fall over my shoulders in wavy tendrils of golden brown.

I sneak out as stealthily as I can manage, making sure my mother doesn't notice I've been here for all of four minutes, and I start to mingle with people, saying hello to the people I already know and welcoming the people I don't. Just like my mother taught me.

"Cadence, it's so nice of you to finally join us" my mother says from somewhere behind me. I excuse myself from the middle aged woman who has been talking about her carrot garden for three whole minutes, and turn back to find my mother standing in the kitchen doorway, her arms folded over her chest. She gives the woman I'd been talking to a cheeky grin that she reserves only for people she wants to impress, which is everyone except for me and Drew, and then she drags me by the wrist until she finds a quiet hallway where she can reprimand me without being overheard.

"You got here thirty minutes later than promised. Honestly Cadence, I'm not really sure what to make of this. You're about to go to college, yet you can't even bother to follow a simple schedule..." She goes on and on as I tune her out, letting her have her daily rant about how flawed I am.

Someone clears their throat from behind me, I turn around to find Andrea wearing a peachy cocktail dress and looking as beautiful as her brother is handsome. I almost sag with relief at her interruption, and I know she can tell I needed rescuing when she sees my expression.

"Sorry to interrupt, but Charlie's on his way up. We gotta get into positions and take cover," she says.

My mother nods and stalks out of the hallway without another word, I can hear her charmingly and effectively quieting everyone up. I start to follow her but Andrea stops me with a hand on my shoulder, "Don't take it personally, she's just stressed. We've been planning this party for weeks and you know how much of a perfectionist she is. I'm sure she didn't mean to take it out on you."

I might've believed her if my mother hadn't been doing this for about eighteen years.

"We both know that's not true, but thanks for trying to make me feel better." I smile a little. Sometimes I think I like Andrea more than I like my own mother. And then I want to slap myself because that's just a shitty thing to feel.

Andrea sighs and puts her arm around my shoulders, "Let's go surprise the shit out of my husband."

***********

Three hours into the party and it's still going strong. People are milling about with drinks in their hands, dancing and mingling with each other as if they have no intention of leaving any time soon. I don't mind it though, after having the pleasure of seeing Charlie indeed being surprised to the point of shitting, and dancing with Andrea and some other people who I've met tonight, I'm happy to have a mindless distraction from all the drama in my life.

I'm currently dancing alone in our living room, which has been emptied of furniture to make a makeshift dance floor, only distantly aware of the people dancing around me, bodies pressed together, moving and grinding to the beat of the music. It's almost like a club, my mother and Andrea have outdone themselves, I've never been to a party that has so many people who seem to be having fun this much fun.. Usually, I hear more than a few complaints over the booze being bad, or about how much the DJ sucks, etc. But I haven't heard one complaint since the party started. My mother is good at that, I realize. Making people feel the way she wants them to feel, manipulating people into thinking in a way that would benefit her most.

I shake my head a little to clear it, and resume my dancing. I close my eyes and let my hips move to beat of the drums, my body writhing with every note and every lyric that's being played and yelled from the loud speakers.

Male hands grab me by the waist and I almost jump out my skin. I look back to find a guy I'd met earlier when my mother was introducing me to some people. He was a client's son, maybe in his early twenties, he was nice looking and had a body that I'm sure makes it easy for him to get girls. The gleam in his eyes suggests that he knows it too.

I think his name is Reece or Raymond, maybe Rob. It definitely stars with an R though.

R-something gives me a seductive smile and before I can protest, he pulls my back against his front and starts writhing against me. I scowl and try to remove his hands off my body. "Randy, stop!" I yell at him over the music.

He chuckles against my ear, "My name's Nolan" he answers. Whoops, definitely not an R. My bad.

"Well Nolan, there's a thing called personal space and I'd like to have it"

He chuckles again, "You're funny. Come on baby girl, dance with me."

I cringe at his words,"I don't want to dance" I say, as firmly but politely as I can manage, not wanting to cause trouble and upset my mother.

"Come on cupcake, I saw you dancing so hot and sexy just now, and I couldn't help myself. I had to have my hands on you" he says, I can tell he's drunk off his ass. He smells like he drank the whole keg, and his words are a bit slurry.

"Sorry, I don't want to dance anymore" I say, and I manage to get his hands off me. I flee to my bedroom as fast as I can. I open and close the door, leaning against it as I let out a deep breath. I think I'm done dancing and schmoozing for the day. Despite the way the party started, I think my mother thinks I did a good job mingling with everyone today.

The door moves behind me and I jump for the second time in ten minutes. Nolan pops his head in and when he sees me, he smiles a very suggestive smile that makes my skin crawl.

"There you are" he says, his words slurring so much that sound more like 'there your'. I cringe.

"Get out Nolan, I don't want you here" I say, trying not to panic.

"You won't be saying that after I do this" he says, and then he grabs me by my wrists and pins me to the wall beside the door. He lifts my arms above my head and lowers his head to mine. His tongue penetrates my mouth before I can scream and I almost gag at the taste and smell of him. I try to kick at his legs, but he's so strong that he manages to spread my legs apart and grind his pelvis against mine.

I try to struggle against, but panic and fear have as strong a hold on my as his body does. He moans inside my mouth, and bile rises up my throat. I can feel my eyes watering. All I end up doing is whimper against his mouth. He takes that as a sign to continue, as he somehow manages to deepen the kiss, swirling his tongue with mine. I try to move my legs but his body is pinning to the wall so hard, that my legs are practically coming off the floor. He thrust his pelvis against mine again.

"Cadence are yo-" I hear a voice saying on my right. And then Nolan's weight is lifted off me. I almost sob with relief. I hear a grunt somewhere in the room, and only then do I realize that someone, Drew, had lifted Nolan off me.

Panic rises up again as I look at the floor to find Drew beating the hell out of Nolan. And he's not stopping.

"DREW!" I yell, running over to him and trying to pull him off Nolan. "Drew, STOP! You'll kill him!"

Someone must've heard me yelling because a second later two male bodies rush over to Drew and lift him off Nolan.

"What is going on in here?" My mother shrieks from the doorway. The two men holding Drew back, Charlie and one of his army friends Dylan, realize that as long Nolan is still in the room Drew won't stop thrashing.

"Get him out of here!" Charlie yells, and Nolan's father rushes in, lifting him over his shoulder, and glaring at everyone in their path. Another man coming over to help him. Nolan's shirt is torn, blood dripping down his face.

I'm shaking so hard that I have no choice other than to sit on the floor. I lean against the wall and hug my knees, trying to reign in the sobs that are clogging my throat.

I look up to find everyone staring at me expectantly, I think they just asked me a question. "What?" I mumble. The door is closed and only my mother, Charlie, Dylan and Drew remain in the room.

"I asked," my mother hissed, "what happened? Since Andrew is obviously too worked up to utter a coherent word" she says his name like she just found a slug in her salad.

I take a wobbly breath. And then I tell them everything.

They remain silent the whole time. Even when I stumble over my words, and when my voice breaks and I have to wipe a tear off my face. Even when a sob escapes me.

Drew's face has gone bone white. His hands are shaking and he looks like he's ready to commit murder. Charlie and Dylan look as if they'd help him. My mother is fidgeting.

Nobody says anything as I finish. And it feels like a while before Charlie says quietly," this party is over." He nods to Dylan, and they file out. I hear their loud voices thanking everyone for coming and politely asking them to leave. I almost want to go run up to them and squeeze them in a hug. I don't think I can handle all this crowd and noise right now.

My mother rubs her neck, and for the first time ever she looks totally uncomfortable. "Are you alright Cadence?" She asks, "is there anything I can do?"

I can't remember the last time she asked me something that remotely resembles that sentence, and it saddens me to know that a situation like this is what drove her to do it.

"I'm fine, I just want to take a shower and sleep" I murmur.

"Alright. I'm going out to fix this mess, I won't be back 'till morning unless you need me. Call me if you need anything." Aaaand she's back.

The room is quiet. It's so quiet. My heart is still beating so fast that I can feel thrumming in my chest.

I hear Drew's light footsteps as he makes his way over to me. He crouches down in front of me and gently, so gently that I barely feel it, puts a hand on my cheek. I cover his hand with mine pressing it to my cheek. Wanting to feel his touch on my skin, wanting to erase any memory of any other man who ever touched me.

I feel his bruised knuckles under my fingers. So I grab his hand and inspect the back of it. Surely enough, I find it covered in drying blood, some of it protruding from the bruises on his knuckles and some of it is Nolan's blood. This must hurt like a bitch. Tears fill my eyes.

"Thank you for help-" I say, but he cuts me off.

"Don't thank me Cadence." He says hoarsely. "You should have never been put in that situation. You Shouldn't have gone through that" I could swear silver is lining his eyes.

I'm left speechless. He looks at me, scanning my face then my body for injury. When he sees I'm not physically injured he nods to himself and looks back up at me. "Go take a shower, take as long as you need. I'll go make sure everyone has gone home and lock up. I'll be right back. Call out if you need anything."

I look at his hand in mine and place a lingering kiss on the back of it. Showing him how much I appreciate what he's doing. What he did. What he always does. He takes care of me, makes me laugh, makes me cry, makes me happy, makes me love him, makes me love myself. I can thank him for the rest of my life and it wouldn't be enough.

His hand squeezes mine as if he understands. I give him a small gentle smile, and I see his throat bobbing.

"Go, I'll be right back" he says. He helps me get up and ushers me into the bathroom making sure I have a towel and everything else I might need before leaving to lock up.

I step under the hot water and immediately start scrubbing my body, running the soap over every inch of my body twice to get rid of the scent of him. It takes me ten minutes longer than usual to finish my shower, and I step out of the tub, already feeling more relaxed and refreshed. I dress quickly and wrap the towel around my hair, waiting for it to dry a little so I can comb it and pull it up in a ponytail.

I get out of the bathroom to find Drew sitting on my bed, a mug of hot chocolate cupped between his palms. I smile a little. "Is that for me?" I ask him.

He returns my smile with one of his own, a dimple poking his cheek. "Of course it's for you."

"Ah, you know me so well." I sigh contentedly. He chuckles.

I walk over to him and grab the mug from his hands, taking a sip from it and placing it on the nightstand. I sit beside him on the bed as I unwrap the towel from around my head and reach for my hairbrush.

"May I?" He asks. I look at him in surprise. The last time he combed my hair was when I was thirteen years old, I could never reach the back of my head so he'd sit with me on my bed and comb my hair, cracking jokes about the people he worked with and about goofy things his employees did.

I nod, maybe a little too vigorously. And his smile widens. He takes the brush out of my hand and motions for me to turn around.

I bask in the feeling of his fingers running through my hair. His hand caressing every strand before he runs the comb through it. The feeling leaves me lightheaded, and I feel so content and safe.

"You're in trouble with mom, aren't you?" I ask him.

"Yes" he says it like he doesn't give a shit.

"I'm sorry, he just followed me in and I couldn't-" I start.

"Cadence stop, you did nothing wrong. Your mother is mad because she thinks I shouldn't have bashed his face in. She says I could've just lifted him off you, as if that's possible" he grumbles.

"Where did she go?" I ask.

"She went to kiss that dickhead's father's ass so he won't press charges and then she'll probably spend the rest of the night w-" he cuts himself off.

"What?" I look over my shoulder at him. His face softens.

"Nothing, she won't be back until tomorrow," he says.

I face forward again. I feel like there's something he's not telling me. But I'm too tired to ask. We stay silent for a while, the only sound in the room is the brush untangling the strands of my hair.

"I didn't know," he whispers, the sound of his voice spearing through the silence. "At first, when I saw you with him." His voice cracks a little and I hear him swallow. "I didn't know you didn't want it. I didn't know he was forcing you, I thought...I thought you wanted him."

I freeze. "Then why did you hit him?" I ask incredulously.

It takes him a few moments to answer and I don't dare turn around, afraid he wouldn't speak if he was looking me in the face.

"I...was jealous." He says quietly. My heart rate picks up. "I saw you with him on the dance floor and I thought you were doing it because you were upset with me and wanted to forget about what happened. I saw you going to your bedroom and I wanted to talk to you about it. And then I found you here, with him, and all of a sudden I'm punching him in the face." This time I do turn around, I look at him with wide eyes. He's looking down at the brush in his hand, trying to avoid my gaze,"I only realized what really happened when you were explaining it to everyone. And when I found out the truth...Jesus Cady, I could kill him. If I see him again I don't think I could stop myself."

I open my mouth to say something, and then close it when I realize I don't know how to respond. Does this change his decision to keep some distance between us? I'm trying really hard not to let my hopes up, but it's difficult with the way he's looking at me right now. Like he wants to pull me in his arms and comfort me, protect me from harm. Like he wants to kiss me.