Can the Phoenix Rise

"Ben's blow up meant what little remained of our marriage due to my behaviour went up in flames. Julian saw Nancy's response and thought she had slept with him. She hadn't. Her guilt over what was happening caused her to accept that rather than tell the truth. It would expose so many others.

"Ben's words with Dewar meant he backed off for a few weeks. It may have been helped by someone beating the fuck out of him the next weekend."

She was looking sadly at the kids as she went on. "When your dad and I finally spoke, I lied to him. I told him Dewar touching my hair, my back was arousing me, making my nipples expand though he couldn't see them due to my bras which your dad hates. I told him my cotton monsters were catching the flow out of me and Dewar could smell it. If I fucked him it would revitalise our sex life. Your dad couldn't believe what I was telling him. I never allowed us to speak about our poor sex life.

"In truth, I just stopped myself throwing up. I was never aroused by him or any of the others. The only man who has ever caused me to be aroused is your dad."

She turned to me, "It was Dewar who forced the restraining order not Nancy. He was mad at you and wanted his revenge. I had to act as though everything was good so you'd breach it. He even told me to fuck you if necessary. I couldn't. I didn't deserve your love.

"The divorce options you showed me just confirmed what I already knew. I had destroyed your love and the love of my family. I couldn't leave the firm as Ben had suggested.

"After you left, I lost my self-control. I went out with Nancy, Susanna and we all got drunk. We didn't fuck anyone. We refused male company. We were all in a bad place. Matheson had fucked Susanna. He showed her the video. She'd no idea how she did that. She was devastated. We couldn't see any way out.

"At home, I saw the anger, the sadness in our children. All because of me. I withdrew more. I couldn't tell them what I did so their father couldn't contact them. I was drowning in a sea of lies. I couldn't support them as I should have as my guilt told me I wasn't a mother anymore. Even then, I was seriously contemplating taking my own life, what did I have to live for.

"At the firm's dance, it finally happened. We'd no choice but to attend. Ben said at the divorce he'd been given the video of us but hadn't watched it. He may after this to confirm what I'm about to say. During the night, we tried to stay away from those bastards but Dewar and Matheson found Nancy and me. Shortly afterwards, I found myself in my room with Dewar. I'd no recollection of getting there. Dewar undressed me. He kissed me, fondled my breasts before moving to kiss them. I couldn't stop him. I don't recall my nipples being aroused. Your dad loves they do expand a great deal when he was playing with them while I get embarrassed at them."

She was blushing as she continued, "He opened my legs and played with my pussy before he moved down and ate me out. He couldn't have been any good as I never felt any response. He undressed and I laughed. He wasn't happy. Well, his dick was three inches and thin at best. Normal sausages are bigger and probably stiffer.

"As he moved between my legs, my hand stroked his dick a few times. He came over my thighs. He never managed another erection. He just upped and left. I showered and went to sleep as I was so tired for some reason. I spent the weekend so down as I knew the other eight would now be after me. The question always in my mind was "Why? Why did I allow him to my room?"

"Nancy and I talked over what had happened to us. Matheson and she had gone to her room. He wanted to play with her great breasts so she wanked him off over them. He left afterwards. She didn't know why she went with him either.

"On the Monday, I saw Jennifer in the office but we didn't speak. It was when I was interviewed by the Police I learned she had found some real dirt on those bastards. She had put monitoring stuff in the building and on the computers. The Police used what she had found to make more enquiries. I had to give a hair sample.

"To cut the summary down, they used drugs which the tea service served at the work to override the woman's ability to give consent. The reason I did so little when you confronted Dewar was because they'd given me a dose earlier. He had been going to take me to the hotel. So, thank you again for standing up for me.

"The hair samples showed remnants of the drugs they used to overcome our resistance. It's one of the reasons they were left with no option but to plead when the judge accepted the warrants.

"What none of us knew until the mess was exposed was that they were using their control of those they had fucked to entertain clients including your old boss Ben. They didn't need drugs as they had the videos to control them. The Police said the enquiries have uncovered quite a few more who will be appearing in court soon.

"I've given a written victim statement dealing everything they did, how they coerced and controlled us. How that impacted on my life, my family and the fact I have no future. I only started to become who I was when the Police started arresting them. I could see some light at last. I wouldn't be a rape victim as so many others were. The downside, I had lost those closest to me. It's that which hurts me the most. I have an empty space within me.

"What is worse is that because of me I know you all endured so much pain, rage, disbelief at my actions.

"Our group of friends has been so badly damaged as well. So many lives turned upside down because we worked for that company.

"Both Nancy and Susanna will tell their husbands today what happened to them. Both expect to be divorced soon.

"You all have every right to be bloody mad at me for not putting my family first. I should have. I know Ben would have believed me at the beginning but as things worsened between us, he'd only see the reason as me wanting to fuck others. He'd have been given those videos to prove it.

"No one did this willingly. It's easy to say had we known everything to come, we would have told you. I'm not sure. They caused so much fear amongst us. The Police think they have done this at other places and are investigating further. The way they behaved I think they are right. They knew how to control all of us.

"The damage to everyone is immense. I've lost the love of my life, my relationships with my children, my parents, friends will never be the same.

"I'll do my best to be the mum you all deserve."

She laughed as she looked at me, "I won't be putting a red light over the door unless it's for you."

I blushed.

We all asked questions and she answered them. It was a toxic environment. The owner had been forced into putting the business up for sale. Well, he would be in jail for a long time hopefully. The perspective new owners know the value of the staff. They want the staff to remain as they are bloody good even if the atmosphere is poor now. As regards what went on they have said openly, they will not tolerate any such behaviour.

The firm had been doing very well. It was the group who approached the owner at some function and explained what they could do. His claims changes were needed to save the firm was false. It was only to allow him and them to abuse his staff.

Judith asked about Dewar. Sam blushed as she looked at me, "Your dad threatened to remove his dick and balls. Someone did. He's known now as Simone apparently. His friends couldn't believe your dad wasn't in jail. The Police couldn't break his alibi. Hell, if he needed one, I'd have given him one. Tied to our bed as I tried to persuade him to give me a chance to prove I could be the loving wife he deserved. He'd need a splint!"

Our children were blushing at the image their mum had presented. Me too. Sam never spoke about sex like that.

When all the questions were over the two mums went to prepare a meal. I took the opportunity to speak to Sam and the kids about where they wished to stay for the school term. The decision was Dundee. Sam and I would go to the school on Monday to speak about the rumours and the need to be aware so they could help the many children the court case impacted upon.

On the Monday morning, I spoke with Brian and Jennifer about the changes. He would arrange the necessary agreement of the court but didn't think it would be a problem. We had agreed how much I would pay when they were with her. I told them what she said about Dewar cumming over her thighs.

Jennifer excused herself. She came back ten minutes later. She was shocked, "I'm sorry Ben. She was telling the truth. From the one camera angle I looked at, he was mounting her and it was over very quickly. He looked to be almost where a normal man would have been as he entered the woman. I've looked at another camera angle and it is as she said, she stroked him and he came within about ten strokes. He was so small, he wasn't close. It also showed Sam wasn't truly aware of what was going on. She was emotionless. I should have looked further."

I told her we had already been separated by her actions so it made no difference. I asked about how she'd found the evidence.

Jennifer's first words shocked me, "Sam covered for me. I'd been spotted by one of the bastards but Sam said, "I was there to work on her graphic lightbox which was playing up." She'd done something so it was intermittently flashing. He believed her. She must have recognised me from being at Michael's previously. She knows what I do. Did she suspect I was looking to get evidence against them?"

I was shocked, "She never mentioned this when she told us everything on Saturday, only she'd seen you. Judith asked about Dewar and Sam told her what had happened to him. She added, if I'd needed an alibi she'd have given it to me, tied to our bed as she persuaded me that she could be the wife I deserved."

Jennifer asked, "Who is that Sam? She never came across like that when I met her at Michael's." Jennifer gave more details about what she had found. She finished by saying, "Don't be surprised you hear others you may know are appearing in court. This involves a number of firms. They have done this before."

I left them and headed to meet Sam as we had an appointment at the school. Sam laid out what had happened in general terms and where the rumour mill was wrong. Our children and many more would be the subject of much comment. They undertook to make all the staff, especially the guidance staff aware and would clamp down on any bad behaviour.

I suggested we head for a coffee afterwards. Sam suggested our own home so we could speak freely. She'd seen I had questions.

Once there I noticed she'd been decorating. I congratulated her on the design. She smiled, "We talked about it but never got round to it. I had nothing else to occupy myself so I started. I have Eileen's room to complete. Our bedroom is the last. It needs done but I don't want to as it will extinguish the last memory of us here.

"What's troubling you?"

I started slowly, "I saw Brian and Jennifer today. He's happy with what we discussed regarding the support for the kids. He'll put it to the court to rubber stamp it. The Sheriff will be happy as she gave us six months to sort it out. She must have realised the kids would lose their anger.

"I told them what you'd said about Dewar cumming over your thighs. Jennifer was shocked and disappeared. She came back apologetic. She'd seen one camera angle which looked like he'd mounted you and cum very quickly. As he sat up she saw his small dick but assumed it was that size as he'd just cum. She looked at another camera angle and it confirmed what you said. It showed him quite a distance from your pussy as he came. She was so sorry she'd misled me. It was obvious you weren't engaged at all with him. This would confirm what you said about not knowing why until the Police told you about the drugs they used.

"She then told me you'd covered for her. You never mentioned that on Saturday. Why not?"

Sam looked at me sadly, "I was going to. It was on my notes but I couldn't. If I spoke about it you would be angry at my sheer stupidity. Seeing Jennifer caused me such conflict. I had two emotions. One was easy, you wanted the evidence to support the divorce my behaviour more than warranted so why not allow her to find it. The second one was the one I wanted to believe but knew if I said it, you'd rightly fly off into a rage.

"I told myself you were showing your love for me, trying to help me out of this situation. There was still hope for us. Stupid. I'd already killed any chance you could care for me in the future.

"You caused the whole thing to fall down. Jennifer's bugs, videos destroyed them. I knew nothing more until the Police interviewed me. Their revelations shocked all of us.

"At the divorce hearing after Jennifer spoke, I saw how my brief dalliance with a fantasy reconciliation was just that - a fantasy.

"I've been seeing a counsellor Dawn to help with my depression. She's still delving into how my behaviour long before all this was breaking us apart. You said how cold we'd become. It wasn't true. It was me. It can't have been pleasant to have your wife reject you more often than welcome your lovemaking. She's brought out some reasons and says there are more to come. Once there she hopes to help rebuild me.

"If you wish to make joint appointments with Nikki or my counsellor to help you find your answers, I'll do it. It's the very least I can do. Hopefully, it will allow us to be able to discuss things better so we become even better parents. Mark's scared now, he has to match Judith as Dux."

I laughed, "It's not a competition. As long as they do their best and achieve their dreams, not ours, I'll be happy. Judith said you took Eileen and her for feminine items. Thank you. I dreaded that. Mum spoke with Judith a few times about such stuff as well."

Sam laughed, "They are growing into fine girls. Judith didn't half put my parents in their place. We've spoken a few times since. They were scared to speak to me after their bust up in case I returned it with interest. We're slowly rebuilding our relationship. Judith takes the drive to theirs in her stride. I hate that road; so many blind corners and house drives straight onto it. It's a nightmare.

"Judith called me last night. She was asking if I'd been your alibi. I told her no unfortunately. There were a number of people who heard her dad threaten Dewar so any of them could have done it. She asked about what I meant so we'll discuss that when she is here. You'll find it hard to believe that I talk about sex with our daughters, even Mark on occasion. Dawn found my triggers which caused me to fail you. She's helping me look forward so I can help the kids."

I was shocked, "It certainly confused me. I didn't recognise you when you spoke about tying me up. My mind conjured up some confusing images. How are you managing speaking with them about sex?"

Sam spoke softly, "Dawn has helped me so much. It all starts with self-respect. Never be forced to do something. If they are forcing you, they don't care for you. They've learned in school about the details but while we'll speak about that, I emphasise the relationship aspect. How sex with someone you care about is so much better as each of you looks to please the other. I don't say, not that your dad would think that ever happened in our marriage. You'd be right.

"My life appears to be one full of regrets. Regret that I wasn't the wife you deserved, regret I ever joined that firm. Regret I see no future as I don't want anyone other than you. The only person responsible for that is me."

I blushed. I don't know why. I answered, "Looking at everything, I see what Nikki was saying was correct. You've given some answers but there are others like you've suggested, long before Dewar which play on my mind. If you're comfortable with your counsellor we'll use her. She knows you so will be able to ensure the questions give you the ability to be open. Nikki learned to open me so much, I'm sure she turned me outside in at times."

Sam laughed, "I asked her why she didn't say torturer instead of counsellor. She laughed and said it wasn't good for business."

As I was leaving Sam caused me to stop in my tracks. She was smiling as she said softly, "If you want to experience what I'd have done for your alibi, let me know. I've bought the restraints as well as some other stuff the counsellor suggested for me. I'll even put a red bulb in the front door light. It will have to be this week before the kids come back for school next week."

My jaw dropped. Who was this Sam?

Once home, I told the kids about speaking with the school so they knew who to approach if anyone started making life difficult. I also told them Sam had helped Jennifer gather the evidence but didn't want to mention that to us.

Later I updated my parents. They were surprised about her helping Jennifer. Dad laughed as he asked, "Did you ask what she meant about giving you an alibi?"

I blushed, "No. It was something we had discussed many years ago. She wasn't receptive. She offered to give me the experience this week as the kids will be back next week for school. I don't know who this Sam is?"

Mum asked, "Is she seeing a counsellor?"

I nodded, "She's suggested joint sessions as I have so many unanswered questions. Nikki said the same. Not only from the event but previously."

Mum nodded, "She'll be like you, exposed, vulnerable. She'll have questions of you as well. It will help both of you. If you can relate better it will rub off on the kids. Saturday was the first time I could say, I saw someone who was Sam since this all began. She was such a wreck before the trial started. Had we not been there she may well have killed herself. She never spoke about anything positive. All she saw was what she'd destroyed. Her biggest hope was we wouldn't hate her for ever. What she said took a lot of nerve. She was squirming at bits but knew you and the kids needed to know all the details. Your dad and I have discussed it. We can't come to an answer about what she should have done. The pressure, the conflict must have been immense.

"You can help each other."

Over the week I took a few loads of stuff for the kids back to the house. Sam did ask if she should put a red bulb in. I declined. On Saturday, the kids moved. Mum and dad helped as well. There were several things they needed so Sam and my mum took the girls. Judith drove them as she had her test in six weeks. She hoped it wouldn't be postponed like many had been. She'd aced the preliminary theory test.

Dad and I took Mark. After getting his school clothes and trainers, do youths own shoes? Mark asked if we could go to the computer shop, "My computer is struggling. I want to see if some more memory, a better graphic card or maybe a new processor will help. We had it built so it could be upgraded. Once I know, I can find some work and save for the bits."

The guy remembered us. He had been at the school awards and congratulated Mark and his friends. He brought up our system from his records. He spoke to Mark about his usage and the problems he was encountering. He looked thoughtful. "The processor is more than capable. An upgraded graphic card and more memory would work. With the level of use, I'd suggest an upgraded fan system to keep everything cool."

He gave a cost and I bought the stuff. Mark knew how to replace everything. The guy said, "If you have another more standard computer with graphics inbuilt on the motherboard, that existing card would boost the performance there. Just change the settings." Mark smiled. He knew what to do. Dad and I were confused.

Mark said as we were going home, I didn't have to pay for this but I told him, it was for his education.