All Comments on 'Carlotta's Rival'

But still a well written humiliating tale.

So glad she got pregnant, it was a perfect finish to a beautifully humiliating tale.

You should write a sequel about Carlotta getting revenge

Is Charlotte or March preggers? And March's deal was that she would stay away from Donald, so bringing Donald to the thing broke her deal. I can't wait to see what happens next.

It seems to me that, if I this story were to continue that is where it would be headed.

This is one story that isn't finished yet. If you can't write it down then go see FTD and see if he will finish it. By the way author, you wrote this knowing full well Marci would go after Donald, why not just let the two of them fight over him. That would surely seem to be the best outcome. Instead, we need art 2. Have Carlotta get back at her, by either setting her in a roasting pit, like you do meat being cooked for dinner. Maybe by sewing up her nether regions, or just by getting her in the wharehouse, and using her for BDSM games, only they last something like 4 months. During which time Donald has no partner, her father fires her from the job, etc. Then put her on the streets in another country as a whore. With no identity to prove who she is. That would be interesting.

That is such a bitchy thing to do to us.... She could have voiced her worries to Donald. Bitches can't always win sometimes the good women do... Come on, have a paternity test either that or rewrite an alternate ending please I know that life is sometimes unfair, but you did not give this couple a chance... She accepted way too fast, she didn't even put up any resistance, please give them a fair chance. I saw this coming, kind if but that is such an evil thing to do. He's ruined now. She needs to find the love of her life then and have Marci try again, but fail miserably and after Carlotta is happily married with her actual soulmate, have Donald realize that he made a mistake and it was a set up. I have never being any situation similar to this, but it somehow touch a nerve. I don't know . I had a feeling this would happen but there has to be a man out there that can resist her, no one is that good. It was very well written if it had that much of an impact on me. Well good luck and at least think about all these suggestions. Take care

Good start hope you continue