All Comments on 'Carry That Weight'

Nice, well written with a great twist. I keep rereading it. Write a sequel.

most of the anonymous trolls on Lit are not literate or mature enough to understand a story like this. Most of all, they cannot understand the method that HDK uses when writing a LW story.

It's all about the plot twists. It's all about originality. It's all about not writing the same story that everyone else has written time and again. I challenge anyone to write a couple of dozen LW stories and have a couple of dozen different plot twists and different takes on the genre. Most writers on this site write the same story over and over again, only changing the character names.

And of course, the anon trolls are looking for one thing only: torch the bitch. That is their criteria for judging the worthiness of a story. The kind of payback used by the husband in this story is far too subtle for the limited intellectual and emotional capacities of this crowd.

Misused words. Poor sentence structure in places.

But...I still gave it a five. I loved the story. It very much worked for me.

I would suggest you read Ashely's statements out loud and see if you think a human being speaks like that. Hint: they don't. Not so much.

Still, I loved the story and your writing has improved. You do interesting stories. Grammer and spelling can be fixed with practice

Yeah, Jeff needed to lose his family. But he didn't want to hurt Amber after saving her and her baby and Jeff's daughter Amy. Jeff will have to live with that as he showed himself as not much of a man or friend.

Ashley would probably not make it very long in real life as this all will be passed around the family. Jeff will be disgraced along with her because his daughter Amy and Amber will want no longer respect Jeff for screwing the hero's wife while the hero was saving theirs.

I liked the story, and yes, a sequel would be wonderful even at this late date...

is that Jeff planned to get him drunk. There was little in the story that let me believe it was a drunken accident, though that was essentially what Ashley claimed. If you had shown where the three of them had been drinking and then he fell asleep and then it happened it would have been more believable. None the less, a good story.

Please consider a sequel. I think Ashley was sincere and it would be worthwhile to see how she held up under the stress of his distrust.

Your story leaves a lot of options for a sequel. I suspect that many of your readers would like to see a follow on.

Thanks for writing!

I have been rereading a few of HDK's stories because there just aren't many good new stories on the site.

As I read comments I must confess, I just don't get it.

Why all of the over analyzing?

HDK stories are known to be short while providing sufficient substance to allow for reader creativity.

I don't know of any other author on this site that can provide as much entertainment in as few word as HDK.

Stories like "Back to Bristol" by GaryAPB which are 22 chapters long are the type of story to analyze.

These types of stories are also good but delve into far more environmental and emotional background for the reader.

HDK's stories are just as good but are meant to be lighter and in most cases just a fun read. Doing math calculations on the the number of rooms? Seriously?

With this story as most of the HDK stories, a sequel would just detract from the original story.

I miss your writing HDK.

While there are other good authors on this site, no one currently fills the void of the types of good stories you have given us.

Thanks.

All that's missing is revenge sex with Amber.

What a pussy the bastard fucks your wife and you basically pat him on the back and tell him nice job utter bullshit

First, anon on 11/12/2011, what he did to Jeff with the head trip was far worse than what he could have done by beating the shit out of him. Jeff will carry his guilt and fear for the rest of his life. I am sorry you are not able to see that.

The story was fairly good but had one big missing for me. He never asked her why she did it. She said it was a mistake. What the hell does that mean? She could have meant "It was a mistake because I thought his dick was bigger than it was."

Regardless of the amount of alcohol, I would want to know just exactly what went through her mind when she laid down and spread her legs. If you do happen to write a sequel, which I doubt, please explore that question.

how is being disappointed in her a punishment. Parents, kids, grandparent and teachers get disappointed. Slut get divorced, not some bullshit about living with the pain of not being trusted.

than headtrip the betrayers. WBC prefer the humiliation, not let on so maybe some photos/film, then exposure to the world so the humiliation of the cuckoldry really hits home, then they blow their little loads.

the husband will get his revenge by "trusting" his wife and denying her his love. you know that the others will finally find out so this is a real ass kicking for the cheaters. and the dude will always have to call his child by the cuckolds name and fear that the wife will find out.

not my way of doing things but it sure as hell works.

He could decide on these alternatives:

1. Divorce soon after the affair, to struggle the custody (generaly lost it) to divade the assets etc. However the exhusband psichic integrity will be 100%.

2. Divorce when his less child becomes 14 years old. Te children can go to his new condo/apartman/condo freely the custody is not a obstacle to meet his children..

Some years together without love and less psichic integrity.

3. Divorce when the less child becomes 18 years old. The children are adults and the effects of their future life is the least. More years together without true love and less psichic integrity.

4. To live together long time and to hope the wife does not cheat again. If the wife a little slut the likelihood of the cheating is almost 95% (15% of the wives). If the wife is an average bitch the likelihood of the cheating is 70% (25% of the wives), if the the wife a relative fidelity wife the likelihood of the cheating is 20% (15% of the wives).

There is a 5th alternative the mutual suxual activity (swapping,swinging and the true open marriage), however to bring up children well the best the monogamous (with faithful or relative faithful spouses) family. I suggest to read on SOL (storiesonline.net) from Flavian's newer story the "Biggest and Best". Excellent example......

"Lets make suicide infront of them, that will make them feel guilty when they wake up"

God some Authors here really are into wimp-porn...

the more i believe she and he had been doing it a long time. you dont get fucked by someone and curl up with them for a nights sleep if it was a first time.

and I'm going to make goddamn good and sure you feel like shit for the rest of your fucking lives."

sounds like a fair trade to me

no one forced them to fuck, so what he did is fair and valid.

and permission given for Jess to keep fucking his wife. It will likely happen again and they will get caught, again. I guess that makes him the willing cuckold.

The story was well written and flowed well.

and to finish Tom's thoughts " that way I can keep eating Jeff' creampies he leaves in your slimy cunt". If this isn't the biggest Cuck/Wimp story on this site .. well I don't know what is! Go Cuck Yourself Harddaysknight!

the more i think about this

the more i believe she and he had been doing it a long time. you dont get fucked by someone and curl up with them for a nights sleep if it was a first time.

This isn't a real story. The author made it up. Got it? So if he says it was just once, it was just once. If he wanted us to believe it was a long term affair, he would have told us. If you want a different story, write it yourself. I do not understand readers making comments like the above. You might write something like, "I don't feel the story is consistent, because I believe that any woman who curls up and sleeps with a lover all night, wouldn't have done it if it was a first time." Of course that doesn't make sense and the author implies it isn't true, but whatever floats your boat. Just don't write as if you know more about the background of the story than the author. That makes no sense.

The closet cuckolds that dominate this category sprout wood based on long term rampant cuckoldry, not one night stands. If it isn't in the story, they fantasize and add it in. Let them get their jollies how they want.

it is a story with implication and insinuations. the wife said it happened only once and my comment was to that and it being a lie, by implication. he gave her permission to continue because that was all he could do, to save the kids. his marriage was over, it was a lie, just like her "one time" statement. of course it is fiction, like all these stories, but it was supposed to have a moral or theme, and she and lover were going to have to carry the weight, especially her. in the end the weight would crush them, others knew about it and the hero took the high ground for his kids, knowing the low ground would soon turn into quicksand, because the others would talk eventually. i like the theme, not sure about keeping the bitch, but that is not the story i read here.

Tom is a better man than me. I would not be so accommodating to my cheating wife and my friend who betrayed me. I don't know exactly how I would have handled it but it would be different. Perhaps a "Carry That Weight" Redux might be coming.

We'll see...

HA

because he doesn't have one. face up to cuckhood boy, you imagine additional infidelity even if the author omits it because that floats your boat. come out of the closet - your denials are embarrassing.

No one seems to notice that his wife wasn't drunk.......

Therefore she knew it was going to happen and gladly cheated - AND she did it bareback !!

Damned if I could do as the Author wrote.

I don't think his wife will stay true,and she will cheat again.

This story left me angry and uncomfortable,as I was not at all satisfied with the ending.....which means that it must have been a well written story !!

What a wimp of a man. Bad story, cause that wimpy excuse of a man should have tossed her halfway through the room..unsatisfying ending

Ambivalence because I understand the mindset that had him turn around and walk away from the scene after NOT suiciding (that would have been the runaway option IMHO) he had a debt of honor to the bastard and so he decided it was paid and he would walk away not everyone's choice but still has integrity. But there is not enough clear detail in the story to give any sense of comfort about WHY or how often they do make a difference in this story as laid out.

We have to assume it was planned by at least Jeff from the start it MAY have been a follow up to something from their past and Ashley was vulnerable (not excusing folks just looking for knowledge) or it could have been conspiratorial and consistent (no ground work for that - the behavior was odd enough he caught on immediately) - sooo if this was a pattern or she is capable of that level of deceit then his tactic may work for a while but is more likely to fail although not absolutely - otherwise the guilt is likely to keep her straight as an arrow longer than he is likely to care heh.

The rest of the family is likely to feed into this as they learn about what happened as is almost certain to happen.

Another "Nice" cuck story! Glad to know your readers can "count" on you just like Tom can "count" on Ashley to be "faithful" when it comes to telling the truth!!!

why did he not even the scorel he was not a wimp but his lack of action made him weak. he will get a divorce because he cannot accept her cheating and will never trust her again.

the better option - I think - is to avoide even the need to be concerned with trust issues for Ashley. Go forward without her, and maintain a happier life without her.

And Jeff, any debt is paid. Sentimentality toward the cheaters is gone, with eyes directed elsewhere.

this is just a great story. you know everyone will know she is a cheating whore and he is being the man and you know she will be dumped sooner than later. very subtle. well done.

If you cannot forgive and move on, move out

no need to suffer yourself to make someone else suffer

the old saying 'when diging a grave for revenge, dig two' is right

I have been a professional writer for over 25 years.

Your story rocks!

... HDN that was a very interesting and entertaining story. It does cry for another chapter. I would be interested on how you see the long term affect of the "weight" on these complex charactors. Will it cause a change for good or worst.

please keep writing .it looks like you slowed down lately.

You are a very gifted and talented writer. You kept the reader involved the entire story. It was a fast-paced, heart racing plot. I loved the story, but hate the notion of such a noble and courageous protagonist being stuck with a cheating bitch. Dump the bitch at the end, and its perfect.

Good story thanks for sharing.

She did it before. she went to sleep after fucking him - women don't do that on a first fuck, they get out of dodge if it is not their bed. and everyone will know - there was another family group there and they will eventually talk. the bitch and her stud will fall and damn soon.

...says it all. nicely done! I LOL'ed. I love the black humor. seems that some readers did not get it, oh well.

I read this story and actually really liked how it ended. Unexpected, but too the point. It was her problem now and he would either accept her efforts or he would decline them, but none of the groveling and wondering whether he was man enough. He KNOWS he is man enough, the question now is she woman enough?

It sorted reminded me of Clint Eastwood in Grand Tourino (sp?). A very clever way to deal with the situation. And like that movie your ending is very original and not much like many here. I wish you would write more your humor, and twists are fun to read and really to the point.

... his revenge was perfect.

Panther Fan.

Once trust is thrown away, it is gone! And the effective 'stop date' for the trust is NOT at the episode where it was destroyed ... it is from the couple's FIRST memories to the indefinite future!

This is a powerful morality play! Another tale which should be required reading for both parties before granting a marriage license, and annually ever after!

5.9 = 5*

that will go on and on. Ashley has no way out without alienating her entire family.

It is a clever attempt at revenge. Only problem is that he will be the one suffering the most. Better to simply leave her. If he stays, she will suffer in silence for a while, eventually begin to resent him, and finally become the habitual cheat he pretended she was. He becomes a cuckold. Doesn't sound like much of a revenge plan. Thanks.

Sweet revenge and be able to feel good about it. Of course, his wife is a slut and always will be. I hope she feels uneasy the rest of her life. She will pay forever.

Yes, I realize it is just a story but you made it seem real.

You are not writing much, I would enjoy to hear the rest of this story!!

this story is finished. she will forever pay. the other family members will know what happened within a week, the otehr two will say something. she fell asleep with her fuck buddy in his bed, that comes only from a casualness that comes from repitition.

and you know she will break - the pressure will be too much and he will be the good guy and she and the brother in law will be garbage. the stroy works for me just like it is.

Although, the stupid cunt got away with it [again] -that sucks!!!

Sorry but you wrote 2 different characters for Tom. The guy who saved his neice is an entirely different person from the one in the hospital. Boy he really showed Jeff too didn't he. Hoping a person who just plyed you with alcohol so he could fuck your wife in the same house as you has enough conscience to feel ashamed about it is like asking the Taliban to feel ashamed about killing americans. Not very likely so that part fell way short of intended target. A guy who is tough enough to go through all that he did while saving his neices is not the kind of guy who would just say please be discreet while fucking my wife in the future so you don't humiliate me and my standing with the family. Those 2 characteristics don't make sense in the same person. A guy like that would definitely not wimp out in the way you just had this guy do. Come to think of it though, maybe the hero action is the part that is out of character for him because he was acting real wimpy when he had the gun too. Hmmmmmmmmm!?!? Seems to be a huge contradiction here!?!?

There is a flaw in your characters revenge plan: They don't give a shit! If they were decent people they wouldn't intentionally gotten him drunk, and went of to fuck! They are selfish, low class shit. What he should have done is to be honest, let the whole family know what happened, refuse the honor of having the assholes son named after him - who'd want their name on a cheaters kid? Let all the nurses know what happened and ask them to keep those people away from you so you can heal up and get out of the hospital. Then call your lawyer and get a divorce. Move on. There is nothing worse than living a lie in a sham marriage. Fuck it.

giving a shit about doing something is different than giving a shit about others knowing and more than the fuck buddies and the hero know, so it will get out.

when cheating like this takes place, a best friend and a loving wife who didn't show any signs that she is dissatisfied with the marriage, when they cheat and it was clear that they did plan for it, thought about it, and try to make it happen, they were not both drunk and found themselves in bed by accident, she did not fuck the other guy and after the rush cooled came back running to her husband bed, SO, the question is, was this their first time, and if they are planning a first, is it logical to have it in the family house where they could be discovered, no, but if it was a full blown affair then probably they got careless because they have done before and were not caught. The eternal question is, does he know his wife and best friend enough to assume that they will feel guilty and by this he is punishing them, does the question that people change ever entered his mind and did he wonder that the man he knew all his life and the woman he fell in love have changed and he did not realize it or notice it, his wife planned on fucking another man under his nose, isn't that a clue enough that this a selfish woman who doesn't care about her husband, and her reaction after she was found out was simply as it is, being found and by a member of her family and not because that she faced the horrible truth that she has cheated on her husband, . I know that authors try to find new plot all the time and new angles the life long story of adultery, all i am trying to do here is discussing the idea of punishment by guilt,, the writing is the best as usual, thanks for sharing.

Did she or didn't she? Did they stay together or not? We will never know, because like so many LW writers this one does not have the balls to finish it. Rather let us use our imagination.

If he finishes it where they stay together, then his scores will suffer. If they divorce his score will go up.

Just finish what you started, coz what you have is good. So damn tired of these open endings

the story is finished. too many people know they were fucking and that hubby saved the studs lchildren and wife and did it with a blade in his chest, chasing the bad guy down. everyone will know it was not a secret. come on, dickens wrote the last line of a tale of two cities with something like, It is a far far better place i go than i have ever been before; it is a far far better thing i do than i have ever done before, or something like that.

was it bad because he did not write how he walked up the steps, how bad he felt, the hands on his body forcing him to kneel, placing his head in the device. his view of the bucket where other severed heads had faled before. the look of fresh blood and the smell of death in the straw that failed to soak up the blood so that it ran like water in the place de la concorde. is dickens a wimp author becasue he did not describe the act and terror of the beheading or was his last statements enough?

HDK finished it, you have to look at the beheading yourself without the description being written for you. the marriage is over, what is left is not a marriage. duh.

Sorry Cantbuymy, you went a little deep. HDK just didn't finish it. It looks a little weak. Could have used a epilogue or something. She is now free to fuck anyone. And will he be real and not have sex with her again or will he be a wimp and let his cheating bitch wife shit all over him?

You both have great views on this. But someone else does not seem to like it. they are so far up HDK's butt it is pathetic.

The author is a cuck and cock succer.

beside the above, he writes well, so ask Lit to have Cuck section and post yr crap there

Please add a sequel. It's been three years. Let Tom come to some closure. Let him bang Amy and Amber and reconcile with Ashley. Or not. It is time for Jeff to pay.

the ending is perfect the way it is. everyonbe will know she is a whore and he is a hero.

she fucked him and then slept in his arms, that is not a first time thing.

if you do write a follow up, and i hope you dont, have a DNA that makes the kids be someone elses.

you can neither spell nor use proper English, yet you berate (is that word to big for you?) one of the best authors on Literotica. And no, not all his stories are reconciliation, and this is not a reconciliation story. I suppose the concept of mental revenge is just too complicated for you. BTW - proper etiquette (sorry, another big word) in comments is to criticize the story, not the author.

Tom is obviously capable of violence, but the mind-fuck he lays on the two cheaters is truly first rate.

...and this was!!!

My epilogue, she finally gets totally annoyed, angry, hurt, cold and kurt with him because of his aloofness and unwillingness to talk about the past.

In the event the children are his and as much as he had once totally loved her, adored her and felt complete with her, he would torment her until she ran off pulling her hair out (figuratively) to her parents, a girlfriend or even someone she had worked with and then, he got total custody of the children and she would get visitation and possibly even chaperoned visitation.

You write well but this guy is too deep, too emotional, too romantic and too caring to ever be able to not constantly relive the experience of that evening and night...it's too bad but they won't make it and that is sad because he really is a good husband and a real, honest man.

Epilogue here, even after all this time, would be appreciated by many, many of us!!!!!!!!!

Thanks!

And I have to say, every time I've read this story, I am more and more horrified by it.

This is not a critique of the writing (there were a few sins in that regard). Nor is it a ding against the realism, or the quality of the mind fuck.

However...as a writer, I take a look at the plot threads and I cast them in the wind to see where they will go...and every time I do, I see agony, pain and loss, huge quantities for everyone involved.

Maybe it is because I am a drama king. Maybe because I favor dark stories. But this man, in his short sighted way of wanting to get 'mental pay back' is sowing the wind.

He will reap the whirlwind. Which is too bad because I generally like him.

hdk crapola, like jpb

The word "awesome" is overused, but is the only one I can think of to adequately describe this story; 5++++

Fuck! another little jnr wimp on the way. Connor's lepers.

burger. -0*

1 stupid mother fuck wimp ass

wimp hdk wimpy tale, maybe an autobiography

...they got off too easy for my taste. Nevertheless: Well written, even though you seemed to rush at the end.Do not let the "Anonymous´s" impress you: They are too wimpy themselves to sign with their names, a habbit they share with many "micro-cocked" (let us call them) "men".

deserves all the mistrust she gets. I hope she suffers. If this was real life instead of a story this marriage would not last.

Having laid guilt trips, doubt about their future fidelity, their character and the suggestion they keep on fucking...three things are going to happen...

1) His image of what he saw and knew would continue to manifest and grow bigger and more difficult for him to deal with!

2) She would get rattled, hurt, horny and in need of release to the point that she convinced herself that he really wanted her to cheat and to leave him alone.

2) She would feel helpless and unloved to the point that she finally decided 'What the Hell', she was a cheater and he didn't believe she was or could be faithful so...next opportunity with anyone interesting - "SHE Will Get Laid! After all, we know she didn't have any moral scruples and only needs a little flirtation or excuse to consider a little play time SO>>>>>>>

If you had written a follow-up to this fantasy story, I'm wagering that I'm on the right track. This guy is an old fashioned romantic and was totally and emotionally in love with her. What he saw, what he realized, he could never again believe her, trust her or eventually even touch her.

A follow-up would be interesting but then - we run the risk of you patching things up so - Good Ending!!!

Thanks!

But I would keep her around just so that I could spend money, none of it on her. Separate bedrooms, never touch her, certainly never fuck her. And if she complained about the lack of sex, I'd just tell her I imagine she was getting all she needed elsewhere. Plus, with an infected cunt like hers, for me to use two or three condoms at the same time wouldn't let me get the job done.

Gentlemen, there many ways to skin a cat and sometimes not divorcing and writing them off is the best form of revenge. Keep her around to keep the house clean, cook some meals and some conversation. Past that? Not much else...

I know it's pretty much complete, but I would really like to know what hppens next. Gave it a 4 instead of a 5 for that reason. Still enjoyed it though.

Why don't you ever finish your stories? Right when they start to get interesting you stop writing..... that is cheap!

the wife planned to cheat.

The cheating cousin planned to cheat.

the trusting friend/husband was set up with extra booze and disregarded.

the unsuspecting wife and daughter were deliberately scheduled to arrive the day after the rendezvous, by design.

By accident the unsuspecting cuckold saved the lives of the cheating husband's family.

Do the two cheaters deserve to get off without consequences?

Hell No!

And, the whole family knows it! Get Real!!

Yeah, he laid a head trip on Jeff. But he never got any real revenge on either of the cheaters and he admits that he was never going to trust Ashley again. Who wants to live life like that? Better to get a divorce.

If Tom owes Jeff for saving his life, then what does Jeff owe Tom for saving his wife and children ?

Started off OK,then turned to shit. So....all he gets out of this hospital stay is a cheating wife and friend,neither of which he can trust. Even though he was really trying to guilt them by his hospital bed(by giving his tacit approval),he's given his permission to cheat together.If he was to deny Ashley intimacy for any length of time,that permission to stray could be used against him,whether he really meant that approval or not.In reality he's given her Card Blanche to have affairs not just with Jeff,but anyone. Re:"Show me a small amount of respect and I won't interfere with you fucking other men." Bad,bad,move. He better be able to get it up for her,or that statement is going to come back to bite him in the ass.

The hospital would have been the perfect place to exact a fitting revenge rather than the lame ended this story had. Just imagine the two cheaters exposed in the hero's hospital room after he saved the pricks wife and daughter. There is no way in hell that I would ever take that cheating bitch back. He did not owe his friend the use of his wife that's for sure. I have saved several peoples lives over the years but I have never felt they owed me anything. I drive allot for my job and I have come across a number of motor vehicle accidents. I was there at the right time and place and able to use my safety training to help out.

Lonewolf2013

Both of them know how little they are trusted, how small they are in his eyes. While I'm a big BTB fan, this may be the ultimate. And all it takes for the next 50 years is just a dig here and there to let them both know that you assume they are still low life bottom feeding cheaters, but that you are willing to put up with their cheating.

Nice 'un!

There is no forgiveness for their unforgivable and preplanned scurrilous cheating. And, to do it so in such a physical location as to guarantee being caught. Clearly there is no respect for him. Tom should quietly divorce her (with all the family knowing the "why") and making her an outcast. He is the hero and she and Jeff are the low life villains.

Lose your head over a piece of ass. Man up Tom, you pussy.

Do you write ANY stories where the guy ACTUALLY stands up to (and punishes) his cheating spouse? Damn. You turned this guy into the biggest pussy as far as his wife's faithfulness is concerned. Really? You think slinking out of the house like a 12yr old was the best way of dealing with infidelity? I understand that he didn't have to shoot them both to teach them a life lesson,but at least wake them up...and kick someone's ass!

It is a good story and it should be further explored

Listen to what the author is trying to say! He is showing us another way how to get revenge without going all caveman on his wife and Jeff. He show he was a man by showing what he did with the kidnappers. And for his thoughts of suicide, thinking your world collapsing and family rip from you is a powerful motivator at the moment to consider suicide, albeit a bad choice.

This is one of my favorites. So many possible options in this story.

Was this an accident, was it planned, will they divorce or not.

I truly would love to see another chapter.

excellent writing.

Do they have kids? Didn't see anything about that. He did say he had a vasectomy, why if there were no kids? You see, kids are the only reason to stay with a shitty spouse. I would bet at any given moment 50% of married couples are only staying married for the sake of a stable home life for their kids. I didn't say happy home life, stable is good enough to raise a healthy kid. If they don't have kids, it is time to call the marriage quits. When it comes to cheating on your spouse, it is never an "accident". It certainly may be a mistake, but that is one that the cheater has to live with, not the cheated. So, once again the verdict is: Tell the truth! Let the other offended spouse know what she is married to. She may chose to wait another 18 years, but she has a right to know that her marriage is dead and who killed it. If you are not honest, it is just a matter of time before he does it again. One day she will find out that everyone lied to her with a lie of omission and she will hate you for it. The truth is the truth and it is the only way to sanity and one day, happiness!

Sixteenth paragraph

What would my two kids, Arlene and Jeffrey, think of me if I shot their mom?

Amber deserves to know what she is married to.

This story needs closure.

Really good concept and story line,thank you

But somehow I had missed this gem. I'm sure glad I found it! I haven't read through the comments, but I would guess that I'm not alone in wishing it was not so terse. This was a brilliant concept, executed with perfection and is complete as it is; but it raises many questions that beg to be answered. I would love to see you revisit this to flesh it out; or even better, follow it up with part two to uncover all the who, what and whys.

Sugna -- see Tw0Cr0ws quote from the story: "What would my two kids, Arlene and Jeffrey, think of me if I shot their mom?" See? Kids. As far as learning the truth goes, she is still in the process of getting the message. Carry that Weight. Get it? That's fair. You write the ending.

Tw0Cr0ws -- nobody got shot.

One of my favorite stories.

the never ending revenge. Jeff`s family loves tom and the two cheaters are torn

with never ending guilt.. to bad tom`s life is going to be crap.

Leave that sorry assed bitch. She was part of the plan. What? Can't part from the money? Fuck her.

5 stars

from any of the three. Ashley cried and dabbed her eyes. Jeff looked nervous. Tom had no emotions. I expected more from HDK.

What a deadly smack in the head !!

Has to be the best you've written - well done HDK.

exceptional foresight, or did it just happen? fate, what a word