All Comments on 'Casey's Recovery Ch. 03'

This story had so much potential. I can't tell how shitty your dialog is DW.

Really like it. keep up the good work.

Now your talkin my language. I made no comment on the first couple pages because they weren't worth a comment.

This page made me want to grab Lillian suck her tits, finger her cunt & give her the best tonguefuck she ever had. I do like big women.

So now Carry On!!!

The dialog is blocky and jerky, doesn't flow smoothly and you need to use contractions on a regular basis. Write like people talk.

...most guys dont pull and stroke their dick when they get undressed, might scratch our balls but thats about it.

...cant speak for anyone else but if Im a young, healthy decent looking guy then seeing, much less banging, an old, stocky chunky lady is on the bottom of my list. Think I would have went back inside and visited with mom after the lady went home. ...and again with the fucking jacking off in the kitchen into a hand towel! Use a paper towel or better yet make the five second trip to the bathroom! I cant read any more of this, yeesh!

Finally all the boring stuff is over and the fucking begins. Good job so Far.

Just belly flopped. What a waste of my reading time to end up in degenerative bad drunk not-even-good-enough-to-be-called sex.

It had started okay, now I feel sorry for the sister who will be unable to defend herself.

This chapter is not worth a comment. The sex in this chapter was emotionless, loveless, and totally lacking in sensitivity.