All Comments on 'Chicago Hotel Adventure'

love the romance and the quiet kids turning out to be passionate lovers. Could do with a sequel (Big Hint)

I certainly enjoyed this story immensely.

Would love a sequel...

Far and away one of the best stories of I have read her for a very long time.

Perfectly written, intelligently written, with style and language that you would never expect.

A brilliant job. You MUST write more!

Sequel, please! I love the characters.

Finish the story, don't leave us hanging.

Great story, love the situation and the thought process of the main character. The pillow talk is really hot, although it gets a little silly after awhile, especially his, I would have ended it after the oral.

You people are insatiable! Give me a little fucking time to write, will ya? But I love your passion and appreciate your comments. Don't worry, I'll show you what happened all four nights. SATISFIED? That's my good gaggle of monkeys. Bananas to follow...

Great story, really well done. Keep it up, but need an edit to pick up things like -- she shuddered-(shook), not --she shuttered-(closed off the window opening with solid panels)

What a great story. Romantic and sexy. Defitnetly need to expand these characters are very well written and they need to stay together. Hell you could probably write a full length novel on these two. Good work.

Well written, great character development, enjoyable theme. As the other reader said, watch out for the shutter/shudder mistakes.

Very well done!

Pardon my lack of constructive criticism, I'm far too 'gone' to care. Thank. You. I came so hard. Eagerly awaiting bananas. That is all, you have a great day now.

Many years ago I had a similar experience as in your story. It took several weeks to the final act but the memory of the moment in time still lingers. She died in a car accident a few month later and I eventually married, but I will not forget her as long as live... Thanks again for your work.. Wish you lot of success int the future.

Please understand that comments about grammatical errors are (as they are meant to be) "constructive" criticism. Trust me, those do take away from your story, which is absolutely wonderful. A reader should not have to be distracted by silly little mistakes like that. Example : I've recently read a story where a guy poured warm oil in his hands and began to "message" her naked skin...now did he really send her a message, or did he "massage" her?? Distracting, isn't it!

Please try to be more careful about grammatical usage, your stories will be better for it. You are a wonderful writer, please accept constructive criticism for what it is meant to be.

Thanks for listening!

First, and most importantly, I really, really liked this story! Not being verbal myself, I found it astounding how much of a turn-on all the talking was! I'd love to see more of these two.

I do want to add that I did find myself distracted by misuse of words - the shutter/shudder thing (which another favorite author does a lot), etc. It doesn't mean the story is less fine, but it means that while I'm getting into it, my mind keeps running into these word things like road-blocks.

I normally try and just skip over these, but because I see the argumnet going on, I just had to kind of throw in my two cents. Keep up the good work and please don't be insulted at any of this well-meaning other stuff.

The story was well-developed, and the characters flowed - very nice. You've got a good gift, and now I have to go read anything else you've done. This was my first story by you, and now I want to see more.

Deb (can't rememeber my username/password, sorry to appear anonymously)

E-mail me copy edits. E-mail me copy edits. E-mail me copy edits. Don't embarrass me in public about the shortcomings of the story unless you find edits that other writers can learn from. You kids keep telling me that typos distract you from a good story. They distract me too! Goddamn it! Fuck! I can't correct the error! I can't do it! No one but the Literotica administrator can! Please tell me how the "shutter" criticism was constructive, and tell me why it couldn't have been e-mailed to me. Tell me!!! Goddamn it!! Am I getting through? E-mail me copy edits!

well, sort of. Once again, this is a wonderful story!!! I only hope the author can cease characterizing grammatical errors as 'typos'. The whole point is to help you, silly! Please don't pull your hair out because you can't correct 'this' story, just try to watch grammar usage in future stories. That's all anyone can ask. Please, relax and enjoy the process, accept the helpful comments gracefully. And the story was posted in a public forum, comments are also public. Nothing to be upset about! Have a great day, keep writing! You are VERY good at it, don't let a silly grammatical error complicate your life! :-)

A very hot story; I like how it developed the eroticism from the head down, so to speak. Their relationship was attractive in an open & honest way, not just a "she was hot so i banged her" level. I actually came away from the story feeling like I learned something.

You have a gift. Thank god you don't just use it for good!

superb story.... i love the talking bit....and the characters are wonderful... can't wait to read part II and III

Fucking great story. Can't wait to read more...

I have never been so hot in all of my life. keep it up, and I'll keep my fingers burried.

Wonderful Story. Your emphasis on their talking was superb. Beginning early in their relationship, talking moved them quickly together; then, as their primal-urge sex got deeper and more demanding, it kept the reader focused on them, on their character, on who they are--not just on what they were doing. You turned a great stroke story into an even greater romantic story inhabited with real people. Good writing.

Vvvvery well designed and better put. Sperb

This is one of the best series I ever read. Keep it up. Great characters and great sex! What a combo.

This story was so hot it could melt lead. I loved the way you developed the characters, as the story progressed. This is the 1st story I have read by you, but not the last. Hope you continue the tale for the rest of their trip.

This is one of the better stories I have read. I realize I am a Johnny come lately this being '06 But the story has not lost any of its impact.

Good job! Well written and a hot premise. Keep writing.

will roger and faith end up in a foursome with wes and sylvia?

that was awesome! I especially liked that she was a cellist cause that's what i play haha.

Great story, reminds me of my youth and my first ever fuck in a hotel. There were four of us, two sisters two brothers, I leave the rest up to your imagination, unly to add that I did get to fuck both sisters!

Keep writing, hope you have time to read my first one.

Tom.

PS Sue got off reading this too!

Absolutely fantastic! The details and the sexual conversation was amazing! Excellent work!

This was good work both from a literature point of view and the sex view. You should continue with it turning it into a short romantic novel. Good luck.

Please be advised that you were granted admittance to the LITEROTICA 1000+ VOTE club today when your story “Chicago Hotel Adventure” recently received its 1000th vote.

You are now one of only 79 authors in the storied history of the site who have achieved this recognition – CONGRATULATIONS!

Gabriella L.

Club Sectretary, “1000+ VOTE CLUB”

Very hot!

I don't usually find myself drawn to stories in the Erotica Couplings category, they rarely hold my attention. But I couldn't stop reading this and on to the following chapters. Well done!

can there be a threesome between faith, Wes, and sylvia that would be hot

Wonderfully written and very sexy

I've never understood why people do story tags like that. Is 'Wes mouth' something people search for? Seems unlikely.

Oh, and the story is of middling quality.

Amazing story. No words will do it justice.

Hands down, one of my all time favourite stories. I just spent the better part of an hour searching for it! I'm so glad I found it and look forward to, uh, enjoying it over and over and over.

This author writes very well, but this story is a Romance, not an Erotic Couplings.

Good premise.

But the sex, when it happens, happens much to fast.

To me it'd have been better if they'd been far less experienced, maybe even virgins. The making out could/should have been slower paced. Step by step. Slowly exposing each other's bodies, touching, kissing, licking -- all above the waist initially.

Disappointing. Frankly, I don't understand all the great reviews.

Three stars.

Another fantastic story. Made me wish my wife were still active. Definitely 5 stars but deserved more.

Bill S.