All Comments on 'Choices Pt. 05: The Ultimatum'

What a wonderfully romantic tale - I only found it this evening and read it non stop.

You will be a superb addition to my list of favourites

Five stars and a big thank you

Stephen

Early in this 5-part history I got the impression that it was going to come down to Erin vs Deana at the closing bell. The author managed to take us on a ride all over the emotional landscape, but until the final page it was not clear where Rob was going to land. A few minor changes is events and interactions between Rob and the two women and it could have come down with Deana the winner. One could argue that if Rob had matured earlier and had thrashed it out with Erin after she wandered off to bed with Donnie there would not have needed to be the late life drama. But youth will screw up if given a chance and so Rob made the blunder as did Erin and it took 20 years to correct the mistake.

It did flow well and both the plot and the characters were well developed. The mechanics of the story (grammar and dialog) were good and there were few times when the story wasn't clear (except when the author intentionally left us hanging after the visit to Deana in Charlotte towards the end). Well done. A composite 5*

As good as any amusement park ride I’ve ever been on. Literally covers all the ups and downs, twists and turns that can and do occur in real life. It wasn’t until the last page of part 5 that you realised that the was actually light at the end of the tunnel.

Excellent story! I loved it and could not put it down.

Overcritical gave you 5*! Consider yourself lucky. This is probably the one time that I actually feel an author’s score should be a tad lower than Overcritical’s score. I don’t see why he continued to pine for Erin after the way she treated him in college and again thirty years later. I would have bet on his “little sister.”

I can't help feeling he made a terrible mistake choosing Erin.

He chose a woman that cheated on him and dumped him, over Deanna who had been besotted with him for years. By all means pump and dump Erin as payback for betraying him all those years ago, but he should've ended up with Deanna who obviously still had a massive crush on him.

From chapter 1, I was rooting for Deana. Guess that makes me the real romantic one.

I really wish he'd ended up with Deanna, she obviously cared far more for him than Erin did. 5*

Well he definitely wasnt thinking with his big head when he decided to marry Erin(also known as S*ut, Bi**h or wh**e)

Great ending to a great story! Wasn't sure who he was going to pick, but it looks like he picked the right one. Well done! 5 stars.

Great story with a great happily ever after ending. Well Done 5+++++stars

Normally I hate epilogues, but this one was aces! Well earned 5*.

Expected him to end up with Deana but it's the author's story. 4*s.

Second time through and still loved it, also feel like he should have ended up with Deanna. I like it when the couples are also best friends in stories.

Still think Erin is sick, and she never admitted that her cheating was entirely her own fault and responsibility, but it wasn't as bad as I feared. At least Deana got a happy ending.

I'm entirely with powersworder's comment.

What do Rob and Erin have going? They lust after each other, something that does occure suddenly and spontaneously and can become obsessive.

But how do you know you might be compatible long term? By going through fights, disagreements and dissappointments and see how both of you handle those. By experiencing how the other interacts with their social surrounding. Evaluating everything that has happened between Rob and Erin throughout the whole story and including Deana as an object of comparison- if I had to chose a partner between those two I'd try to win over Deana. Let's not forget we look at middle aged people here who have already gone through al lot, learned, gathered experiences. Mine say you can learn to fall in love with someone after having made a choice, especially if you feel a deep sympathy already. Lust can also spark in a relationship that started out platonic.

But anyhow, this was fun to read, I'm very grateful to be able to read this author's offerings for free.

Ugh.

Erin showed her colors early on, when she dumped one boyfriend to be with one she wanted more, our MC. To his discredit, MC has no problem with that, since he benefitted. I guess he and Erin deserved each other! At the end, I'm not very keen on either of them.

Deana never did anything like that. See the difference. Deana deserved a better man than our MC.

Thank you for your gracious feedback! Lest I overstated the case, this was a good, worthwhile read. While Deana was a very winsome character, the good here is the MC willing to try again. That's not seen enough around these parts.

Not the ending I was hoping for.

"After everything I said and all I tried to prevent it from happening, I fell into the same stupid trap."

Yes, you did. And now you're going back for thirds. If the MC was a friend, I would feel sorry for him.

I also had trouble with the 30 years in between rounds 1 and 2. Do crushes really last that long?

Sorry, the RAAC just didn't work for me. She was still a manipulative heartless bitch, playing stupid games and the only person who SHOULD have had trust issues should have been idiot Rob to worry about her cheating AGAIN. 3 stars. and only that because of throwing us a bone of getting Diana some happiness.

It was a good story but the ending was unsatisfying. Erin's character flaws limited this reader's ability to be happy for her. MC.... the heart wants what it wants. Although he was able to overcome once bitten twice shy this reader felt slightly sad that he wanted a flawed character. That said, Erin returned the necklace "if it didn't come with his love".) So she wasn't all bad.

In the end life is often messy and some relationships aren't perfect due to human beings... Perhaps this story simply reflects that.

Nice and complete... enjoyed "Choices" very much.

So he ended up with the two timing slut. As expected. You wrote a man who, at no point acted decisevly and towards his own interests. He gave silly ultimatums and always left the choice to her. You don't let others decide for you if you even have the slightest of self-respect. Your next story about this couple should be in the LW section. With the relationship dynamic you established their marriage's fate has a foregone conclusion.

Interesting story and clearly split the audience.

Whilst Erin was quite immature in her behaviour when in College, calling her 'a Slut' is a bit harsh as she only slept with Donny in a mistaken belief that she was getting revenge on Deana.

Rob is possibly a bit of a sub in wanting Erin to make decisions, or is that a bit dom in setting ultimatums?

Should he had gone with Deana? It is clear that from him there was no love spark (aka Lust for her). Without reading again I can't remember who characterised their relationship and Big Bro, Lil Sis, but if it was him is SHOUTS 'I don't think of you sexually'.

If anyone missed out on getting his full time attention it was Laurie from accounts. BTW he seemed hungup on age difference and I think that possibly affected his baseline view of Deana as partner material.

Still this is fiction and life is messy and I think that is what this story is about.

Finally "Epilogue" I think it's a good thing to have*, if you don't like the idea, don't read it, make up your own, but don't ask for another chapter.

*I have a series of One Off '1x:' stories with 'For those who like closure' to stop (reduce) the call for another part. However, in the intro, I say that people can skip that if they want and in somecases I have said they are free to have their own idea of what happend next and one commentator did.