Coming Together Camping

No doubt about it, my brother Josh was always Mom's favorite. Not that it bothered me that much; I just always took it for granted that that's how it was. She didn't hate me, or anything like that; she just treated me different than him. From the beginning, he could always get whatever toys he wanted and anything he liked for dessert. Mom would criticize me and sing Josh's praises, give me chores to do while he got to play, and then say things to me like, "Emily, why can't you be more like your brother?"

It wasn't that bad, really, not being her pet. Josh was always Mom's little angel, which left me free to be a little bit of a devil sometimes. I was never afraid to be a bad girl. I'd argue with Mom when I had to, or say and do things I wasn't supposed to. Mom never expected any more of me. In fact, a lot of the time she ignored me, and that was just fine. I learned to be independent and strong.

Josh's problem was that he was basically a nice guy who didn't mind being adored by Mom. In Mom's mind, Josh was always her baby boy. She saw him through rose-colored glasses, and she indulged him. In return he felt obliged to be a good boy. He never did anything he wasn't supposed to do, or at least never let her catch him at it.

Don't get me wrong; I love Josh a lot. There's always been a special bond between us that goes all the way back to our time sharing Mom's womb. We're twins, you see, and I've always been able to feel what he's feeling and sometimes even to think what he's thinking. In my own way, I feel protective of him too. He's always been my little brother, even though he's only nineteen minutes younger than me.

He was sickly as a child; I've even been told that as a baby, he almost died. I was always the healthy one, so naturally, Mom was less protective of me. But I think there's even more to it than that, and I've always trusted my intuition about such things.

It seems to me that Josh filled a peculiar need in Mom for male energy after she separated from Dad. Nothing sexual was going on between them; it was more of a psychological thing. Mom was emotionally raw and confused when she broke up with Dad, which I can easily understand because so was I. He was screwing other women, though I didn't know that at the time. I was just a child, and all I knew was that something deep, dark and hidden was going wrong between them; Daddy wanted something that he didn't get from Mommy, and so he went away. Mom felt betrayed by Dad, and by extension by all men, and she never took up looking for a man to replace him as a husband or even boyfriend after the divorce. Instead, she glommed onto the only safe, compliant guy she knew who she could never imagine betraying her, her darling son.

By the time Josh was eighteen, the way Mom coddled and protected him was beginning to seem kind of weird. To make matters worse, although he wasn't shy with Mom and me, Josh lacked self-confidence with girls. At eighteen I'm sure he was still a virgin.

From the time his voice changed, I would have loved to see Josh declare to Mom in a moment of rebellion, "I'm not your little boy any more. I'm a man;" but he never did, until his dick did it for him that time when we were eighteen and Mom took both of us camping.

That camping trip was all very spur-of-the-moment. Josh and I were getting old enough to leave home, and Mom had a sudden urge to share something special with us as a family before we did. We hadn't been camping since we were kids and Dad was around. Mom almost couldn't talk me into going. At eighteen, going camping with my family wasn't on the top of my list of things to do, but nothing else was happening that weekend and I felt bored.

"I haven't been camping since summer camp in seventh grade," I told her. "I don't even have a sleeping bag anymore."

"Neither do I," said Mom, "but we still have your Dad's old tent, and a big air mattress with an electric pump, and plenty of bedding. The forecast is for warm nights, even up there, so I'm sure we'll keep each other plenty warm."

I had a funny feeling about that sleeping arrangement even then, but I didn't say anything about it. I wasn't concerned for myself, but I had a feeling it might be kind of weird for Josh. Mom was excited about it though. She thought it would be intimate and snug.

"We haven't done anything special together as a family for a long time," she told us. "We really ought to share the things we enjoy together now, while we still can. We all like the outdoors. It's something we have in common, but somehow we've never taken the time to go camping. I sometimes feel like there are so many things I don't know about you anymore. This trip will give us a chance to have fun together and get to know each other again."

Mom got off work early on Friday so we could get an early start. We packed our gear into the car and headed out. Josh rode shotgun in the front with Mom, leaving me the whole back seat to relax in. Knowing we'd reach the campground late, we stopped along the way at a cafe for dinner. By the time we arrived at the campsite, the sun was already going down.

The campground was pretty isolated, up in the foothills, crowded with trees. We turned off a dirt road onto an even dirtier and ruttier road that led to the camp. A hundred yards or more before we reached it, we passed an outhouse.

"I remember this place now," said Josh. "We were here when I was a kid. It didn't have proper toilets, just that thing."

I remembered it too. I had a vivid memory of the outhouse. "I hope it smells better that the last time we were here," I said.

Three tents were already erected in the clearing. A few people wandered around or sat beside fires, cooking and eating. There were at least a half a dozen children playing noisily. Mom chose a spot as far away from the others and as private as we could find. She made us help her pitch the tent, and then we brought in everything we needed for the night. Josh eyed our bedding as the pump inflating our mattress whirred. The mattress was about queen size, taking up almost the whole floor of our little tent. One side and the head were practically touching the wall, and the little bit of space left at the foot was full of our stuff. Mom had brought one set of bedding that would cover us all.

"Is that really where we're sleeping?" Josh asked. "All together?"

"Sure honey," Mom said. "Didn't I tell you? A family bed. Historically, most families slept together like this. Don't worry. We'll be quite cozy. It will be great to be a bit intimate with each other for a change. "

By then, the sun was already behind the hill, and Mom was anxious for us to all get a chance to pee before it got any darker. We went all together to the outhouse, Mom shining a flashlight in front of us, though it was really still light enough to see the way without it. The outhouse was even worse than I remembered, all smelly and riddled with flies, and when you waited your turn outside you could hear, right through the door, pee and anything else splashing down into the noxious pit below.

"It's a long way to go to that place in the dark," Mom told us as we walked back to our tent. "If either of you need to go in the night, maybe you'd better stay in the clearing. And I don't want you going into the bushes either. You might trip over something you can't see, or there might be poison ivy, or ticks, or snakes, or bears."

"But Mom," Josh said, "it's against the rules to pee in the camp."

"I don't care about rules when your safety's at stake," Mom said. "It's only pee."

We hadn't had time to build a fire, so with it getting dark and nothing else to do, we all got into the tent and switched on our battery-powered lantern. Mom tried to read, and Josh and I tried to find something to talk about that we didn't mind Mom hearing, but soon enough we all got tired of that and decided it was time to sleep.

At home we all had our own rooms, so it was strange getting undressed together in such a tiny space. I tried to turn my back to the others while I took off my bra and put on my sleep-shirt, but they probably both saw my tits anyway, we were all so close. What came as a surprise to me was that I really didn't care. It didn't seem like a big deal at all if my family saw my boobs.

I pulled off my shorts, leaving on my panties, and I was ready for bed. Mom meanwhile stripped down to her bra and panties and put on a short, plain nightgown. Josh took off everything but his boxer shorts. He got into bed first, and Mom made him scoot to the far side to make room for us. I got into the middle, and Mom lay down at the outer edge.

"Everybody ready for lights out? "Mom asked brightly before she switched off the lamp.

The night was warm, verging on hot, and right away I began to resent having to wear a t-shirt. Guys are lucky; Josh only had to wear his boxers. I pushed my share of the covers down to my waist, and the others must have been hot as well because they followed suit and pushed theirs down too. I was drowsy, and I would have gone to sleep immediately if Josh hadn't been so restless. I could feel the covers moving every time he fidgeted, turned or moved his legs.

"Try to go to sleep, honey," Mom said to him. "You're keeping us all awake."

"I'm trying to," Josh said. "I just can't."

In a flash of intuition, like I get sometimes, I knew what the problem was. "He needs to jack off, Mom," I impulsively said. I'd never learned to keep my big mouth shut. Josh gave me a swift kick.

I'd never really thought about Josh jacking off before. I guess part of me had always believed it when Mom said he was an angel. But in that flash of intuition I realized that my brother was just an ordinary, horny young guy.

"Don't be coarse, Emily," Mom said. "He's just excited about being out in nature. Aren't you, Josh?"

But it must have set Mom wondering, for a minute later she lifted up the blankets and looked across me to where Josh lay. Josh and I both complained at the same time.

"What's going on?" Josh asked anxiously.

"What are you doing, Mom?" I exclaimed.

"Keep out of this, Emily", Mom said. "It's not your concern."

It was dark under the covers, so Mom leaned over me until her face was almost touching Josh's crotch. "Mom!" Josh exclaimed as her face approached him.

Mom sighed. "Oh my god," she said in disbelief. "Honey, do you have an erection?"

"I'm sorry Mom," Josh replied remorsefully. "I'm trying to go to sleep. It's just that usually I can take care of that before I do. I haven't had a chance to do it all day."

"Well, why didn't you think of that earlier, when we went out to pee?" Mom asked him.

"I never think of it beforehand. It just happens," he replied despairingly. "Besides, I couldn't have done it there. That place is disgusting, and people who are waiting can hear right through the door. Am I in trouble Mom?"

"Of course not, darling," she told him. "What's happening is only natural. I'm just a bit shocked to see it, is all. Maybe you should go outside and relieve yourself. You know what I'm talking about, don't you, dear?"

"Mom!" I protested. "You can't really mean to make him do it outside."

"Keep your voice down!" whispered Mom. "The walls are just cloth, you know. Go ahead, sweetie. Find a place where no one can see you. You can do it."

"Mom!" I protested. "There's so many other people. He might get caught."

"I'm not talking to you, young lady," Mom told me, then asked, "What would you suggest, anyway? You felt how fidgety he is. None of us can sleep."

"So why can't he just do it here?" I asked.

"Emily!" exclaimed Mom. "Really! You can't be serious!"

But I was. No matter how outrageous my idea sounded, even to me, it was better than him doing it outside and getting caught by strangers. We were family, after all. "It's just masturbation, Mom," I told her. "It's not a big deal. We should let him do it in here where he's safe."

Mom sighed again. "What an idea! But I suppose you're right. We can't risk him getting caught by the others."

"To say nothing of the bears," I added, but Mom was in no mood for humor. She rolled out of bed and turned on the light and started rummaging through her belongings.

"Now, Joshua," Mom said as she searched, "Emily and I are going to go and wait outside so you can relieve yourself. OK?"

"Mom!" Josh exclaimed in shock.

"There's no need to feel ashamed," she told him. "Mommy understands how it is for boys. We'll leave you alone to do what you need to do."

"Really?" Josh asked, skeptically. "Mom, is it really OK?"

"Of course it is, baby," Mom told him. "Just this one time. Otherwise, none of us will ever get to sleep. There they are." She pulled out a box of tissues from one of her bags and handed it to me. "Give this to your brother," she told me.

"Why do we need to go out?" I complained. "Can't we just close our eyes?"

"Of course not," Mom said, and she turned off the light. "Joshua, don't you dare get anything on the sheets. Use the tissues and do try to keep quiet. Come on, Emily, let's go. Let's give your brother his privacy."

I followed Mom out of the tent. "Close it up behind you, will you?" she told me.

I zipped the mosquito screen closed and untied the flaps so that they fell down across the opening of the door. We went around to the side of the tent and stood together for a while in awkward silence.

"How are we going to know when we can go back in?" I asked her.

Mom was taken aback. "Oh," she murmured, "I hadn't thought that through."

There was a shadowy motion at the tent across from us. A man emerged from it, followed by a little boy. Surprised by our presence, he turned on his flashlight and pointed its beam our way.

"Is everything OK?" he asked, grabbing the boy by the hand.

"We're fine," said Mom. "Just taking some air."

"It's a beautiful night, isn't it?" he said, as he slowly approached us.

He must have been about thirty. He was tall and thin, with scruffy light-brown hair and soulful eyes. I'd noticed him checking me out after we'd arrived, when he thought his wife wasn't looking. I thought he was kind of cute for an older guy. Even with his light shining toward us, I could make out his smile, and I felt sure it was meant for me. I also felt sure that his approaching us was just an excuse for shining his light on my legs. He had a great view of them: my sleep shirt barely covered my panties. I smiled back at him and pretended to adjust my hair. When I raised my hand to my head, my shirt lifted up even more.

"Could you turn off the light," Mom snapped. "It's getting in our eyes."

"Sorry" said the man, switching off the flashlight and stopping a few feet away.

The boy struggled to pull his father away. "I need to go!" he whispered.

The man seemed reluctant to leave. "I guess I'd better get him down there," he said, regretfully. "Goodnight." With another smile, he turned and led the boy away. He switched his flashlight back on, and we watched him and the boy make their way toward the outhouse.

"Can you believe that guy," Mom said in a hushed tone, when she thought he was out of earshot, "shining his flashlight on us when we're dressed in our night clothes? Some men have just no manners at all."

I brushed away a mosquito I heard buzzing in my ear. Mom slapped her arm.

"Maybe one of us should go in and look for the mosquito repellent," I said.

"We need to leave him alone," whispered Mom.

"He may even be finished, and we just don't know it," I whispered back. "We'd better check." Without another word, I darted around to the back of the tent.

"Emily, no," Mom whispered after me, but I wasn't about to stop. I stood on tiptoe and peered in through the little triangle shaped window that was open in the back. My eyes were adjusted enough to the darkness that I could see Josh lying on his back. He'd taken his underwear right off, and I saw the shadowy motion of his hand sliding up and down his penis. It seemed pretty big, so much so that it was suddenly hard to think of him as my little brother anymore.

Mom had come behind me and pulled me away from the window by the arm. "Emily, no," she repeated.

"He's not finished yet," I whispered back to her.

"You mean you saw him?" she asked in quiet alarm. "You saw your brother doing it?"

"It's no big deal," I told her. "I masturbate all the time. Don't you?" I could hardly believe I'd blurted that out, even if was only a whisper. Sure, I could be outspoken at times. I'd even bragged to Mom when I lost my virginity, though, no surprise, it had started a big fight with her that ended in me being grounded. But I'd never hinted to her, or to anyone, that I masturbated before, though I'd been doing it since I was thirteen.

Mom was flustered. Though it was too dark to tell for sure, I think she even flushed. "What a question," she said. "I'm not going to answer that."

I took her reaction as an admission of guilt and slapped at a mosquito on my thigh.

"I should have realized something like this could happen," Mom mused. "I should know how boys Josh's age are. Do you think that makes me a bad mom? Not knowing this would come up, and then, when it did, insisting he do it?"

"I think you're a great mom for insisting he do it," I told her. "It's obvious he needs to. But we definitely should have stayed inside and just turned around and closed our eyes. These mosquitos are eating me alive."

"We're a family, Emily," said Mom. "Sometimes we have to make sacrifices for each other. But I do hope he finishes soon. They're eating me too. I wonder how he's doing."

Mom surprised me after she said that by going to the little triangular window and peeking inside. Satisfied with what she saw, she took a step away. "Are you done yet, darling?" she whispered into the tent.

"Yeah," came Josh's muffled reply.

"Make yourself decent then, darling," Mom whispered back. "Your sister and I are coming in."

Josh had covered himself with the sheet up to his waist and was lying on his side facing us when we entered the tent. Beside him on the bed was his discarded underwear and a little, crumpled pile of tissues.

"Is that better now, darling?" Mom sang out buoyantly to Josh.

"Uh-huh," he answered faintly.

"Good," she told him. "Now let's see if we can all get some sleep." Mom picked up the used tissues gingerly and deposited them in a bag she had for garbage at the side of the bed.

"Mom?" Josh asked, quietly.

"Yes, dear," she answered.

"How did you know I was finished?" he asked. "Were you spying on me through the window?"

"There are mosquitoes out there, darling," Mom said. "We just wanted to see if you were ready for us to come back in."

"We?" Josh asked, surprised. He looked at me accusingly. "Were you spying too?"

"Just for a second," I answered guiltily.

"Oh," he said, and for a moment, no one knew what to say. Josh seemed to be taking it all in. "You aren't mad at me, are you, Mom?" he finally asked.

"Of course, I'm not mad at you, darling," she answered. "You did just what I asked you to do. But now that that's done, let's all try to get some sleep."

By the time Mom and I were settled back into bed, Josh was already fading. Mom leaned over me to give him a goodnight kiss. A few minutes later, he was breathing like he'd fallen sound asleep. I must have dozed off myself very soon after.

I woke up later that night, probably because both Josh and Mom, though still asleep, were so restless. Stuck in the middle like I was, every move either of them made disturbed me. The moon had come out, and everything in the tent was much brighter. I couldn't help noticing how good Mom looked for someone who had two grown teenage children. Her breasts filled the top of her nightie and her hips, under the bedding, rose up in a voluptuous mound.