Community College

"Hallelujah, hallelujah, Hallelujah......."

I almost didn't want it to end as my soul felt so good, this song was simply a balm for my weary soul, I decided I should play it nightly, if it made me feel this good I would sleep like a baby, no more the waking in a sweat as I was carelessly discarded again and again.

I looked up to find Helen crying, silent tears fell down her cheeks and I was suddenly distraught that I could have caused her pain when I felt so good. She must have realised what I was thinking, as she reached out and hugged me,

She whispered "Don't you dare, these are the happiest tears I can remember, that is without a doubt my favourite song of all time and you were perfect so very perfect, your pitch the notes the soul of your voice, no I mean the sound of your voice, don't I?" She asked the question as if it held the meaning to the world, and my breath caught in my throat, she had said my soul.

"How? How do you do that? It sounds as if you singing with your very soul?," she asked the question, I never knew I needed to answer as I'd always just done it.

"I do, doesn't everybody? I mean I don't even think about it, I just open my mouth and the words come out, they come out as they want to I don't make them, I just let them be themselves," I was whispering an answer to myself as much as to Helen.

She was once again floored, an open-mouthed guppy fish, don't get me wrong she was still beautiful, a very sexy woman whose open mouth I could ......

"Don't you dare try and run away, please not today," she gasped, " I just want a few answers and then I'll stop I promise, please" she begged, she was too beautiful to have to beg anyone for anything,

"Ok ask away, But I do need to swap a book at the library," I said quietly,

"You taught yourself?" She asked, and at my nod, she continued, "First song you ever learned, No! Don't tell me to sing it, please...." She pleaded, her eyes so big that I just started to play,

"Just about a year ago, I set out on the road, Seeking my fame and fortune, Lookin for a pot of gold...."

As I finished that one I was worried for her, as the tears continued to fall, Man, they made me so happy I hated to see her cry so I handed her the guitar back.

"What! Why? No one more please James, I will beg you!" She gasped and pleaded with me her eyes wide.

"I can't I'm sorry, but they make me so very happy and they are making you so sad, I can't do it any more eyes closed or not, you're just too Beautiful for tears I'm sorry,....." she was kissing my lips so softly it could be a dream, but it wasn't t, she kissed me.

"You silly boy, you are making me the happiest woman alive, this is heaven for me I love all music and to see you make such sweet love to my guitar as well as the songs you sing, Well it's heaven for me it is, One more please," she begged, she knew how to beat me, "Singer's choice Go on surprise me, What will it be I wonder," she whispered as her eyes danced mischievously with sparkling stars.

"You may not like this one as much, but I listened to it three times that afternoon when you gave me the album and this one well it blew my mind!..." I said, but she stopped me from telling her the title with her hand over my lips.

So I closed my eyes and let my fingers play the intro and she gasped as I sang...

"It's all the same, Only the names will change, Every day, it seems we're wastin' away, another place where the faces are so cold, I'd drive all night just to get back home........."

"You heard and learned this a few weeks ago in my shop? Seriously! This was the song that made you smile so much that evening, wasn't it," she said, as she sat there shaking,

"Yeah, you handed me this and blew my mind!" I said smiling broadly, "Now I'm sorry, but I need some lunch, my body eats itself otherwise," at that she looked confused as all she could see was a mass of baggy clothes until I told her I swim a lot, at that she started staring at my body.

"One more, no wait, wait, one more with your eyes open, please?," she asked, I figured I might as well try it as I would have to eventually play to an audience with my eyes open. I nodded but someone knocked on the door and the spell was broken,

As she answered the door, I put her guitar down as gently as I would a baby and slipped around her to freedom, my home cut sandwiches made by old Nan were calling to me, the library could wait. I'd work out harder and fall asleep listening to hallelujah as I'd taped myself singing it in there, the acoustics were off the charts.

Computer science class continued to be a breeze even though I was learning new stuff, The ease I was learning it was amazing to me, I may have a real shot at a nice life if I could keep my head down and not be noticed long enough here.

Everything went easily again for the rest of the week, right up until Friday when once again Helen was my teacher in music class and she was ready for me. Nothing during class gave her away as the usual idiots held court, wasting air with their over-inflated egos, But she dismissed the class with her hand on my shoulder. I Ignored the hateful looks from the wannabe rockstars, who thought it was their god-given right to have the Hot teacher fawn over their nonexistent musical talent.

"James how is it you're never around town? I mean you haven't even been back to my store? Why is that James?" she asked, seeming to like the sound of my name rolling on her tongue.

"I work for a living ma'am, I find a need to earn money outweighs the rest of life's little pleasures," I said respectfully,

She went to correct me about her name, before noticing a few stragglers were hanging around so she proceeded to clear the room, while once again holding my shoulder. It was now just me Helen and her niece left in the room.

"Aunt Helen, why are you holding his shoulder? It's a little forward don't you think?" Her niece asked smirking.

"Because my dearest Lucy, he ghosts away as soon as he can every chance he gets. I've found holding on to him is the only way to prevent this," she replied to her niece, her hand still on my shoulder,

"Is that right Jim? Do you ghost my Aunt every chance you get?" Lucy asked smirking, she was nowhere near as hot as her Aunt,

"As I said, I work a lot and I don't have time to waste chatting, respectfully that is ma'am," I said the last part aimed at Helen who smiled, but Lucy did not.

"I grabbed you this time James because there's a Christmas fate," she said smiling, "Kind of like a party, we break for Christmas in three weeks and don't reconvene for six," she explained

"What, Six weeks' holiday Damn!" I said, "Maybe I could afford a cheap second-hand wet suit," I mumbled to myself.

"What seriously? You don't swim at the minute out there without one do you? It's freezing," Lucy asked, actually looking concerned.

" Don't be silly of course he doesn't, Do you, James?" Helen asked after seeing my face,

"It's cold, I wouldn't say it was freezing yet, I do try and stay out of the deeper waters though lately," I said to allay any fears.

"You'll catch your death of cold! For God's sake James!" Helen yelled at me and Lucy laughed as I winced.

"So the reason for today's kidnap would be? I'm just asking as I do have another class." I said, smiling at her as if it were just the two of us in the room.

"Oh right sorry, Well we are having a singing/talent competition, it's an annual thing and I would like to win for once, Ok The first time actually," she said, getting flustered as I just sat smiling my best smile at her,

"And? You're telling me because it's a requirement?" I asked her seriously,

"Yeah maybe he's too busy with his highflying job, Auntie," Lucy said, mocking me

"Hey now, we can't all have a great Aunt who'll give us cushy jobs in a record store," I fired back at her,

"What! Wait now you two don't fight, ok seriously you may be busy but I know it would take you what ten minutes to prepare a song after what you told me, so would you do it for me, James please?" she asked using that great pleading look on me again, if I were Superman she would be my Kryptonite.

"Hang on, if I agree and it's a big if, But that would be the last time you get to use the pleading look on me this year, Yes?" I said sighing, She was already celebrating and Lucy was giving her a strange 'what the hell' look.

"Agreed,! But A, it would need to be a different song from your song for the end-of-year competition and B" she rushed, As she knew I was about to complain about singing in front of a crowd twice! "B, no more swimming without a wetsuit ok, I mean that it's way too cold. Why aren't you on the swim team if you like to swim so much?" She was smiling, knowing she'd pulled a fast one on me there.

"Damn Two? You want me to sing in front of people twice? And yeah No can do, I need to stay in shape and I am waiting for the swim team to start, I'm on the list," I replied, while Lucy just looked at us both strangely again.

"Well the Swim teams have been running for six weeks, did you not put your number down on your application?" Helen asked, shit No! That would be the answer as I didn't have one at that time.

"Damn! No, I didn't have a phone then, Could I still turn up?" I asked her hopefully but I had a sinking feeling at the way she smiled,

"Well I could pull a few strings, but you'd probably have to have a swim-off at your preferred distance. You'd have had to at the start anyway it's just they've had six weeks more training than you, but it would cost you two songs, Yes two Songs! For me to help, that is," she said so cheekily, she was, unfortunately fucking adorable.

"Sheesh Get a room why don't you! And if you're so busy working could you even fit the swim team in, they practise like six days a week dude," Lucy helpfully added, "Also how is he Our big hope, if he doesn't even like singing in front of people?" she added, she had a point there.

"Seriously! That much, yeah there's no way I can afford that much time off Damn! But if you want me to sing I'd still like the swim off, Just to see what I'm missing," I said dejected as my mood soured.

"Ok will do, Sorry about the bad news but you're a student here shouldn't your loans cover your expenses, you know so you don't have to work so much? Or are you taking care of your family or something?" She asked yet again fishing for information.

"Er, No on the family as it's always just been me, but what about these loans? And why would they give them to me?" I asked her quietly,

"Student loans, Every student is allowed them! How can you not know this? James who is your guardian and why haven't they helped you with all of this?" she asked softly, her and Lucy both now leaning In interest.

"That's a long and extremely complicated story, that I neither have time for nor want to get into," I said my mood getting lower now, she had fucked me over yet again hadn't she, the Bitch that was my StepMother.

"Okay last thing, As I'm roping Lucy in to help me with the competition this year, Sing us a song and show her why you're our star, it will cheer you up you know it will," she said kindly,

"No I have to go sorry and I don't feel like it now, Actually if I sang now you'd cry sad tears and so would I, So sorry let her hear the tape I know you recorded me, Hell I did, Hallelujah sings me to sleep most nights to keep the dreams away," I mumbled to myself, not meaning to say that out loud.

"Ok, so when will you rehearse? You will need to rehearse James," she said seriously but looking at me strangely now.

" I could, Oh Man it would have to be free periods during school time as I work after school. Then I Workout and swim so I'm not finished until nine most nights, although weekends I'm finished by seven," I said, reeling off the times for myself more so than for them,

"Wait, You seriously work seven days a week straight, every week?" Lucy asked as they both stared at me now,

"Well yeah you never know when you're going to be homeless, so I need to save up and I'm pretty sure she will kick me out soon, especially if she finds out they have been giving me sandwiches and good meals twice a day," I said, I was seriously depressing myself now as they both just stared at me open-mouthed, Which allowed me to slip away, I was already late.

I was quiet the rest of the day and I was seriously bummed out, Seeing Helen and Lucy waiting for me again at the door did not lift my mood, I needed to work.

" Look I'm sorry, but I do need to get to work, so....." I started to say, as Helen grabbed me, pulling me over to the side.

"Here's fifty dollars, No take it, I do want to win it's not that big a deal to me. Come to the studio and show Lucy that I'm not mad and I promise I will help you with the loan forms after, say yes please," she pleaded. Which broke our agreement about the pleadings, but damn if that pout wasn't the most adorable thing in the world.

I rang in quickly to let the mill know, but they said as long as I was still In tomorrow it was no big deal, then I let myself be led to the studio where she had the amazing guitar waiting for me again.

As we got settled I could tell Lucy thought this was a waste of time and money, I wasn't going to take her money really, I just couldn't turn Helen down as she was just too damn adorable. I'd even stopped wanking as her face was the one I kept seeing and I thought it was too disrespectful. Damn, I was backed up! especially seeing her there in those jeans Man her ass alone could set a man on fire!

"So," she said loudly, smiling at me as she'd caught me staring at her yet again, Lucy did not look amused, "So fifty dollars buys me three songs I think," she said mischievously, "we will just have to pick the right songs," I could see her mind struggling through an imaginary list,

"Five! Fifty dollars will buy you five songs Ma'am," I said resigned to my fate, "but I can't promise you won't be as depressed as I am after listening to me,"

"If it's just Lucy with me Call me Helen, as you're making me feel old," she said laughing, she was trying to cheer me up, but her handing me her guitar kinda did.

I would need to get used to holding this baby, it was almost as perfect as she was.

"So what's your poison?" I asked and they went into a huddle, I strummed it softly getting the feel again,

"I won't say hallelujah yet in case it gets you down, so Lucy what do you want to hear?" She asked, but Lucy did not look bothered, bored perhaps "Ok I'll choose, you two are depressing. So first off let me hear Wanted Dead or Alive and blow our socks off! Remember eyes closed deep breaths," she said, Calming me as Lucy looked at her as if she were mad.

"Yeah and don't look at Lucy," she added helpfully, getting a dirty glare back from Lucy,

Ok, come on you can do this and if you can't, well that'll get you out of it! So it's a win-win,

I closed my eyes and started the intro which soothed me and the words flowed out on their own,

"It's all the same, Only the names will change, Every day, it seems we're wastin' away, another place where the faces are so cold, I'd drive all night just to get back home........."

When I came back to myself I was much happier, I opened my eyes to see a beaming smiling Helen and an awe-struck Lucy,

"What the actual Fuck! How! How? No seriously how is that possible?" Lucy asked, now completely baffled.

"Didn't I say he would win it for me? I told you Lucy, now pick a song for him to try with the competition in mind. I've my choices locked in but hell let's jam," she said, looking at me so happily that I may have melted, "Now Sing monkey Sing!" She cackled,

"Ok, first off Does it have to be acoustic?" Lucy asked she was getting serious now as she started smiling along with Helen,

"Oooh I'd never even considered electric! How about it Star, can you play us an electric song? We have a spare one here locked in the cupboard," Helen asked, then she looked concerned as I went quiet, " don't worry if you can't though, But why the sad face?" She asked so kindly I had to answer honestly now.

"Never tried," I whispered embarrassed, as now they'd find out I was a hoax,

"Wait, what? How is that even possible?" Lucy asked loudly,

"Hold off a minute Lucy, James seriously you've never tried? She's right in a way it does seem impossible," she asked me softly, standing in front of me now so Lucy couldn't embarrass me any further, it was a very sweet thing to think to do and I was grateful,

"Er I just never had the chance, I'm sorry can I go now? you can keep your money," I said in a whisper, sadly

"What fuck! Hell no, what is he a savant,...." Lucy raged but Helen cut her off,

"OUT! Go on out, just give us the room for five minutes please," she said firmly and a seriously pouting Lucy left,

"Now James, I feel as if I'm missing a big part of this story so please fill in some blanks for me ok hon," she said so sweetly, that I had to tell her some,

"So I can't say everything or I'd be kicked out, so bear with me it's a long story," I said shaking,

"Nope! No uh uh," she said "Nobody's forcing you her baby," she cooed soothing me, "come on lets you and me go grab a coffee, you can talk as much or as little as you like. Then after maybe you sing the rest of my songs for me at the shop, or in my apartment, the acoustics aren't as good but we'll struggle by ok," She was like a balm to my wounded soul, I couldn't say no and she led me out of school and over to her apartment above her shop, After promising a pissed off looking Lucy she could be there when I sang.

She made me a coffee and sat me down on a lovely worn but oh-so-comfortable tan leather couch in her living room, which was like the couch, worn looking maybe, but lived in and loved, I felt at home there.

I started from the beginning, changing some names and she picked up on it when I did, but she played her recording of me singing Hallelujah in the background. It was as if she had picked up on me saying it soothed me, she was a very clever woman.

At the end of my story, I looked up and she was weeping silent tears again, but I knew these weren't happy tears. She moved closer as if I were a skittish colt she was afraid would bolt any minute, then she slowly slipped her arms around me and gave me the first truly loving hug I'd ever received, or could ever remember receiving. There was nothing sexual in it, But it truly healed a small part of a big tear in my heart, I cried along with her for the small boy still hurting hidden inside myself.

She felt when I'd had enough, she pulled back slowly allowing me to compose myself,

"I'm sorry," I whispered, "I didn't mean to......." But she put a finger to my mouth,

"Never apologise you, poor poor sweet boy, what have they done to you," she whispered, wiping fresh tears from her eyes, "So this bitch, She made you a weapon out of spite and now she holds eviction over your head? My god, what kind of an evil bitch does that to a small boy? I am so sorry baby."

"Look forget the songs we can go through the application process, we could get you enough money to stay somewhere safe, hell with your grades it'll be a cinch," she said so kindly, that I had to look away.

"No, if it's ok with you I'd like to try an electric guitar if you have one. I've always wanted to try one out, but just us maybe, your niece is a bit intense it's as if she thinks I'm lying or something," I asked quietly,

"Ok well the guitars in the shop and she will fight me tooth and nail, but I promise I will make her behave, we will try it up here ok," she said not waiting or giving me a chance to back out as she raced to get the guitar,

They both returned a few minutes later and Lucy looked contrite as she watched me through lidded eyes, as Helen set up the guitar with a small amp, she strummed it herself as if making sure it was good enough for me to try with.